LOVE UNMASKED

Sharon Pugh

CHAPTER 2

After Meg had left to leave her to get ready, Christine smoothed out her dress, and tried to fix her mind on the details of it, just to stop her thoughts leading to where they always led. The dress was like nothing Christine had ever seen, beautiful white satin and lace stretched down to the floor, like a cascade of beauty. Carefully, so as not to crease the material, Christine lifted the dress over her head and slid it down over her body. Then turning to her hair, she swept it up into a bun and watched as some curls escaped and framed her face. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she reminded herself how lucky she was. Raoul really did give Christine the best of what life could offer. Only the finest wine would ever touch her lips and only the finest materials would grace her body, and yet she yearned for the one thing that he couldn't possibly give her.

Although she fought desperately against herself, what she really wanted was to see the Phantom. Her angel of music. Without him in her life, she felt a little lost. The thought of even singing one note, let alone a whole song, filled her with dread for how could she sing after she had betrayed her angel so badly. She had condemned him to a life alone, broken his heart and after all he had taught her, the gift he had given her. Since she had abandoned her angel back at the Opera Populaire, she had lost the courage, the ability and even the desire to sing.

"Wandering child, so lost, so helpless,

Yearning for my guidance"

The Phantom's words crashed into her mind, and as usual, all other thoughts were pushed firmly to the back of her mind. He had been right after all. Without his guidance, she was lost, without his tuition, even if she wanted to, she very much doubted that she could sing now. The thought of singing in front of anyone made her feel such immense terror, she felt sick to the stomach.

Angrily, she looked away from the mirror and hated herself for allowing the Phantom to constantly invade her mind. She couldn't understand why she felt this invisible pull towards him. All she knew was that now the Phantom was no longer guiding her, she had ceased to feel anything but numbness and despair. Her love for Raoul was real, he made her happy and she knew that she would always love him but her affection for the Phantom was equally as real and as powerful and she felt unmeasurable guilt at how she had betrayed him. All he had done was love her, love her and help her achieve her dreams.

"He is a murderer!!!"

Christine reminded herself out loud. She knew that she should not ever forget the tragic deaths that had occurred out of his love for her. Could such unpleasantness really be borne out of love? What kind of love was that? Evil, dark, ruthless. And yet those words didn't seem to fit with the man she had grown to love in the darkness of the Phantom's lair.

"I shall never forget what you did for me" Christine raised her eyes above, as if hoping her words would reach him.

Suddenly, a soft tap at the door interrupted her thoughts.

"Christine, can I come in?" Raoul softly spoke

"Of course" Christine smiled.

The sound of his voice, her beloved's voice drew her back to the present, chasing the dark clouds away. THIS was what love was, surely, a happy thing, a bright sensation, filled with sunshine and joy. Not death and destruction.

Raoul entered the room and handed her a giant bouquet of white roses.

She took the flowers from him and smiled up at him brightly. She knew she loved Raoul, completely and utterly, she had been smitten with him ever since she was a child. She knew that this love was pure, healthy and that she should absorb every pleasure that came of it. Alas, At the same time, deep down in her soul, she knew that her longing to see the Phantom was increasing every day, painfully so, but that was something she knew she must never do. Fulfilling her need to meet with the phantom, even just one more time, was the one thing that would crush Raoul, and she couldn't do that. She mustn't.

"You look beautiful Christine" Raoul touched her cheek and run his hand over her face "But then you always did, you always have"

"Oh Raoul" Christine's eyes beamed as she admired the roses "Thank you Raoul, they are lovely"

"I must be the luckiest man alive" Raoul's smile faltered

"Raoul" Christine placed the flowers on her dressing table and looked worryingly at her fiancé "What is wrong?

"Its nothing.....I" Raoul failed to find the words to describe the many feelings that had clouded over his happiness over the last few weeks.

Every time he looked upon his sweet Christine, the love of his life, he had felt a sickening feeling of unease. He often questioned of himself why love had to feel this way? He had always, throughout his life, felt confident, completely sure of himself and had never even contemplated failure. He had never needed to, everything he had ever wanted, worked for, every business venture he had ploughed money into, had always been a complete success.

Including winning Christine.

He had won her heart, and now he was about to take her hand in marriage and he felt happier than he ever thought could be possible. And yet, for the first time in his life, he felt insecure. Scared that, somehow, she would be taken away from him. That he would lose her.

No matter how he despised him, he always felt that when it came to Christine, he had an affinity with the phantom. After all, they both clearly both loved her, would do anything for her and both of them felt completely broken at the thought of losing her.

But he, Raoul, had won her affections. He had to remind himself of that daily, she was his, she loved him. She had chosen HIM. And yet every time he reminded himself of this, the painful image of his love kissing that.....that monster, clouded his reason. The way she had looked into the phantom's eyes, the painful expression of emotions that Raoul could never even begin to understand, haunted both his thoughts and dreams.

"I find it hard to believe that no-one is ever going to take you away from me. I…." He reluctantly confessed

Christine placed the roses on her bed and lightly touched her finger to his lips to silence him.

"Raoul, nothing will ever take me from you" she promised "You must know that I love you"

He nodded slowly, frowning again, trying to think of how best to express how he felt.

"That night..." he began "At the Opera Populaire, I just can't help...... remembering"

"Don't, please" Christine soothed "No more, we cannot keep going over and over...."

"I will always try to make you happy Christine" Raoul embraced her "I promise you, anything you want, its yours"

Christine broke away from the embrace and looked away from him, knowing that what he said could never possibly be true. She wanted what he couldn't or wouldn't ever want to grant her.

"No more of this talk. We have a celebration to attend"

Picking up the roses, Christine kissed Raoul on the lips and smiled."I am going to find a vase for these and then I will join you in the Ballroom"

Raoul watched as she slid down the corridor in her beautiful dress. She really was exquisite, every detail about her was unique, breathtaking. He loved her more than anything and was determined that he would devote his life to making her happy. He had to do that, not just for him, not just for Christine but for the Phantom. As much as he hated him, his own love for Christine made him aware of how much the phantom had loved Christine and how crushing it must have been to lose her. Raoul couldn't even begin to think of how he would feel if he lost her. He prayed every night in the hope that that would never happen.

Shaking his head as if to rid himself of such thoughts, he resolved to concentrate on the ball and slowly made his way to the Ballroom to see if there was anything more he could do before the guests arrived.