October didn't know whether or not she should actually hand in the essay or write a whole new ones describing how much she loves to dance.

"Hey what are you doing?" Brooke asked October, who had now relocated herself to the kitchen table.

"Trying to decide if my English essay is good or not," October sighed.

"Let me see," Brooke said picking it up.

"No! Mom please don't look at it," October said grabbing the paper back.

"Why not? I always read your work," Brooke replied.

"It's not..finished," October said cramming the paper into her backpack, before heading back upstairs.

The next day, October woke up and she was laying on the floor of her new room.

"Crap!" she shouted, she had to hand in her English essay that morning and she fell asleep before she could write a new one.

"October, you almost ready?" Brooke yelled up the stairs.

"Yeah.." October yelled, pulling on a new pair of jeans and a plain black t-shirt, whipping her hair into a ponytail.

"Common let's go," Brooke yelled.

"I need shoes, where are they?" October yelled frantically.

"Here, wear a pair of mine, common October," Brooke said, getting slightly annoyed.

"Heels mom?" questioned October as she reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Bare feet?" Brooke replied.

"Fine," October said, cramming her feet into the shoes and wobbled over to the doors.

"Honey that shirt's dirty, and it's mine," Brooke giggled, "Did you wake up late or something?"

"Yes, I just woke up when you yelled at me, let me change my shirt I'll be quick," October said turning around to head back upstairs.

"Here, wear a tank top," Brooke said throwing a flowing purple tank top that she had designed herself at October's head, "It'll look good on you."

Brooke then yanked October hair out of her ponytail, she never wore her hair down, ever. Brooke couldn't see why. October had Brooke's dark hair, and long gorgeous waves, but she always hid it at the top of her head.

"There, you look amazing," Brooke smiled.

"I feel like a clone of you," October said looking at herself.

"Bad thing?" Brooke questioned.

"No, you always look great, thanks mom," October smiled.

Brooke wondered where all of her insecurity came from. She remembered herself being completely okay with herself, wearing what she wanted to wear, and looking awesome. October seemed to try and disappear in the background, when she could clearly stand out in any crowd, no matter what she wore.

Both sat quietly in the car as they winded around the roads of Tree Hill.

"Can I put the radio on mom?" October asked.

Brooke smiled, "Of course."

October had definately inherited Lucas' love of music.

October changed the radio to a random station and began singing along to the Placebo song that poured from the radio.

You don't want to hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware I'm tearing you asunder.
Ooh, there is thunder in our hearts.

Brooke slowly pulled into a parking space, letting October out, before driving away down the street. She listened to the words of the song, before tears welled in her eyes.

Is there so much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?
You, it's you and me.
It's you and me won't be unhappy.

October quickly made her way to the library where she slammed down her book and quickly opened her binder. She grabbed her rough copy of her essay and quickly began making a good copy. She felt a little more confident about handing it in now, and wanted to really let things flow.

That Lucas sat in his small kitchen marking the essay that were handed in that morning. He reached for the radio, bored with the silence, after marking about 6 essays that were fairly dull.
He smiled once he reached October's Essay.

Something that means something to me

By October Scott

"She does go by Scott," Lucas smiled, looking at her name.

If I were to write about everything that meant something to me, you'd be reading a novel full of dull and endless drabbles of all the places I have traveled to, the random people I have met over the sixteen years of my existence and my favorite teddy bear. It's hard to depict one single thing in my life that truly means a lot to who I am. The thing that stands out the most is having the chance to have a real relationship with my father.

Lucas took a deep breath before continuing on. He had somewhat expected her to write about something silly like basketball or shopping like the rest of the kids in the class had.

A lot sixteen year-old girls think of their fathers as ATM machines, a ride to the school dance and some think of their fathers as their hero, someone to look up to, and someone to rely on. I've never been able to experience any of these options. Until recently, I hadn't even known what my own father's name was. Then I moved far from home, to a town call Tree Hill, and suddenly I was hearing stories of how my mom left town when she found out she was pregnant with me, to stories from people gossiping around me that my dad had cheated on my mom in highschool with her best friend to accusations that I was a bastard just like him.

Lucas frowned. Were people really saying things like that. He shook his head before continuing on.

I don't know what hurts more. That my supposingly "good guy" father never tried to get to know me or that now he has the chance, I''ve had to make all of the leaps in order to speak with him. On some levels I want him to call me and just ask to hang out, to show he actually cares, but then I think back to how many years my mom spent away from him. I have to wonder why she left in the first place. Maybe he isn't such a good guy after all, and I should continue on without him like I have so far.

Lucas actually felt his heart crumble a little bit.

I usually am unable to share my feeling to those around me, I have some weird disease where I find it impossible to hurt another's feelings. I've kept all these thoughts and emotions so myself. They've always been there, but I haven't let anyone know about them.

Lucas tried to smile, as he thought of how he had often felt that way in the past.

He heard a knock at the door and quickly got up to answer it.

"Lucas.." Peyton started as soon as the door opened.

"What?" Lucas asked looking Peyton in the eyes.

"I'm so sorry," Peyton said, making her eyes fill with tears. Lucas frowned.

"I shouldn't be the one you are apologizing to," Lucas said looking away from her, "Come in, read October's Essay, you are pretty much the reason for all of this happening. If you had never lied to me, then I would've done everything I could to find them!"

"Did you ever think that maybe I just was afraid you'd leave me?" Peyton said choking up.

"So, you being afraid of me leaving you to visit my daughter every once in a while, equals to it being okay that you told me my daughter was dead Peyton?" Lucas asked, "Do you know the hell I've gone through every day since the moment you told me that?"

"No, you seemed fine," Peyton mumbled.

"Listen to this," Lucas said grabbing October's paper.

"I don't want to be this person anymore. I don't want to be gossiped about, I don't want to be a repeat of my father who's apparently a very unwanted child himself, I don't want to be the girl without a dad." Lucas said out loud," You made her that person Peyton. I know I'm to blame too, but Peyton did you never even once think about her?"

"No," Peyton admitted.

"Then I don't want to think about you ever again, go," Lucas said before closing the door. Why did everything have to be so hard? Why couldn't the people you love be honest and why couldn't you trust anyone in this messed up town.

Lucas sat down to finish the paper.

I've spent too many god damned years being that person, and all I want now is the truth. I haven't asked for much, and I think I deserve it. All I am hoping for is that he can step up, and help me move on, otherwise I don''t see the point on wasting my time hoping for something better.

This morning on my way to school, my mother and I sat in silence, and I asked to turn on the radio. I love playing the Radio game, where you ask a question, flip on a song, and that's your answer. I stupidly asked the radio about how I should handle the daddy problems I've been facing. Placebo's strange but captivating music filled the air as the lead singer sang, " Do you want to feel how it feels? Do you want to know that it doesn't hurt me? "

That's how I really feel. I don't think he understands how badly I am hurt. I believe he wants to think I am not hurt by all of this but the truth is, I am.

"You don't want to hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware I'm tearing you asunder.
Ooh, there is thunder in our hearts.
Is there so much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?
You, it's you and me.
It's you and me won't be unhappy. "

This song just fits for some reason. It may not make sense to others, but hearing just made me really think about everything, and realize that I haven't done anything wrong. I shouldn't be the one who's such a mess right now. I have the right to be angry, and I am going to angry.

Lucas, after sitting outside on his steps for about two hours, thinking about how badly everything was messed up. He was thinking about October's essay, 'How do I even mark that?" he asked himself.

I have to wonder why she left in the first place.

Lucas couldn't get that one simple sentence out of his head.

Why had Brooke left in the first place? Why had she left after October was born?

He began walking down the street, before deciding he needed to talk to Brooke.

He called Lilly to get the address, and slowly made his way towards Brooke's house.

"Hi," Lucas said looking at the ground when Brooke opened the door, after he had knocked.

"Oh, um hello," Brooke said awkwardly.

"Could, or would you, um, will you go for a walk with me?" Lucas asked.

"Yeah, uh, sure," Brooke replied, "Just let me grab my coat. OCTOBER, I'LL BE HOME SOON."

When she didn't get an answer she sighed, and walked out onto the front porch.

"Let's go," she said forcing herself to smile.