Author: Elizagoth
Word Count: 2,418
Rating: M (Adult subject matter)
Disclaimer: I own nothing in the following work of fiction.
I woke with a start, surprised at having nodded off. It was still early afternoon and the TV chattered quietly in the background. The ice for my eye had melted into a soggy dishtowel on the floor and I got up to toss it in the sink.
The bittersweet feeling of the dream still stuck with me. It was one of a thousand simple moments we had shared. Just a further reminder of what I had lost. The man, the father, the lover. All at center of what held our small, almost family together. It left a tangible hole in all our lives; one I found I couldn't replace.
In the bathroom I inspected the purple bruise spreading in a familiar pattern across my lid and cheek. If the pinkish scar through my eyebrow had been more raw, it would have been the same as it was after my first run in with Coonan.
My eyes slid to the wallet still sitting on my bathroom counter. Deceptive in its outward appearance. It was strange, how an object could symbolize so much. The man's face stood for what I had lost and what I might stand to gain. Not sure what I was going to do when I got there, I grabbed the wallet and put in back in my pocket. Pulling on Castle's baggy sweater, I pushed my hands through the frayed cuffs and grabbed my keys.
I had the cab drop me off a few blocks from his address, wanting to work out a game plan. My hands were shoved into the faded blue pocket of the sweater, one he'd bought at the Mets game, as I rounded the corner. Glancing at the numbers I stopped outside the building. There, on the intercom list, was his name. D. Coonan, apartment 24C. So innocent and normal. He had been here this whole time, while I suffered in a different part of the same city. The same city Castle was laid to rest in.
Backing away and leaning against a lamppost, I stared up at the windows and wondered which one was his. The memories were fuzzy, the result of me putting them as far out of my mind as possible, but as I stood there it began to come back. How we had run into Coonan in the first place. It was a tragedy born of another, similar, tragedy.
"Hey Scout, what are you doing up?" he asked, rolling to face me in bed.
I frowned slightly in the grey twilight glow, tracing the path of his bare shoulder and neck up to the curve of his jaw and back down.
"What did you find?" I asked quietly, wondering if he'd know what I was talking about.
"Find? What are you talking about?"
He moved closer to me, taking my hand and kissing my palm, tracing the sensitive skin on the inside of my wrist.
"When you looked into my mother's case. You said you had leads," I said, my tone soft and even.
"And you said you didn't want to hear it," he reminded.
"I-I think it's time," I sighed nervously. "I've been thinking about it for months and I've decided that not knowing is worse. I need to close that part of my life before I can move on, before we can move on."
He watched me closely, I could feel his eyes tracing my anxious features. The slow movement of his thumb on my wrist never stopped or slowed, consistent in a way my erratic heartbeat wasn't. I knew he could feel it under my skin, hammering away.
"If you're sure," he said, waiting for me to nod. "Then I'll call Dr. Murray later and we can go over it all. We have good leads this time, and I promise that you won't be alone. Tell me you know that."
I finally brought my teary eyes up to his, searching for some trace of dishonesty or insincerity. All I could see was a stark seriousness and the love we hadn't yet put a voice to. I nodded, pressing a kiss to his mouth.
We had began investigating after that. A few leads had gone cold with the time, but patterns could still be formed. All of the potential victims had been connected to my mother through some way. Every spare moment we had was devoted to the search for truth. Often times Castle and I would wrap up one case, just to jump back into my mother's until the next one pulled us away. We questioned a few persons of interest, but no solid suspects emerged.
Coonan hadn't even been a blip on our radar. His name had never come up during the course of our investigation, but he wasn't stupid. We must have been getting close, to something at least, for him to act.
"This is the place," Castle said, looking up at the legal aid sign above the door.
I glanced around at the street, hoping the answers would jump out at me. No such luck. With a sigh, I grabbed Castle's hand and we walked inside.
It was a typical non-profit law office. A row of chairs lined the left wall and served as a makeshift waiting room. Beyond a low, half wall divider was a series of desks scattered about, all packed high with paperwork.
"Can I help you?" a young paralegal asked.
She looked curious. Obviously we weren't the type of people that usually went through there.
"Yes, I'm Detective Kate Beckett with the NYPD and this is my associate Richard Castle. We were wondering if there was someone here who could answer a few questions."
"Sure, this way. You can have a seat there, I'll just get Larry. He's the 'guy in charge' around here."
We sat in the chairs provided on the other side of a desk with a name plate that read Lawrence St. Jean. A few minutes later the paralegal returned with a tall, scrawny, middle aged man. His glasses were on crooked and his tie was loose around his neck. The phrase underfunded and overworked came to mind.
"Thank you Christine. Detective, Mr. Castle," he said, taking up his chair and nodding to both of us. "I'm Lawrence St. Jean. How can I help you?"
"Mr. St. Jean, we have some questions about a murder that occurred here approximately ten years ago. We were wondering if you know of anyone who would be able to give us some information?"
I watched as recognition flooded his face.
"You mean Lindsay Cooper?"
"Yes, Mrs. Cooper was an attorney here at the time she was killed," I confirmed, looking down at my clipboard.
"Yeah, I know. I was just a student then," Larry said. "Lindsay would let me help out sometimes. You know, off the books. I would look stuff up, research, filing. Little stuff, but as you can see, around here, the more hands the better."
"How well did you know Mrs. Cooper?" Castle asked, interrupting the frazzled man's ramble.
"Like a co-worker, I guess. She took me out for a drink after finals once."
He rummaged through the drawers of his desk, trying to locate something.
"Had she been having any problems? Any threats that you knew of?"
Larry didn't pause in his search, but we watched him shake his head.
"I didn't know her that well. Even if she did, she wouldn't have told me about it. Lindsay was a pretty private sort. Kept her home and work separate."
"Do you know what cases she was working on when she died?" Castle tried.
"I might have them some- ah ha!" he exclaimed, triumphantly holding up an old rolodex.
He flipped through a few sheets, pulling off one and offering it to me.
"That's Lindsay's old address. She had a husband, but I doubt he still lives there. It's a start thought right? Now, let's see about those files."
Larry beckoned Christine the paralegal back to his desk asking her to look something up for him. It took a few minutes, but eventually she returned with a list and a stack of files.
"Here's everything she was working on when she died. There's her original notes and then the notes of whoever picked up the case after she died. I hope that helps," Larry said, handing Castle the large stack.
"Thank you Mr. St. Jean, you've been a great help. Here's my card if you think of anything else," I handed him the card with my name and number on it.
He accepted the card and nodded, seeing us to the dividing wall. Castle and I walked the rest of the way out of the office, past the people still waiting to be seen. I opened the door as Castle's arms were full, and ended up bumping into a man talking on a cell phone outside.
"Sorry," I murmured, bending down to help Castle pick up the files that had scattered.
After we had everything, we made our way back to the precinct.
Several hours and a huge headache later, I decided we should call it a night. Castle had given up, however unwillingly, an hour ago. He had fallen asleep in the chair beside my desk with his head tilted back and an open folder on his chest.
Carefully extracting the folder, I put it on my desk and gently shook his knee.
"Castle, Castle!" I barked, keeping my voice low.
"What! I'm awake!" he protested, blinking tiredly.
"It's okay. Let's call it a night."
He nodded and helped me with my coat, letting his hands linger on my shoulders for a moment.
"Stay with me tonight," he leaned in and whispered, slowly running his hands down my arms until they fell away and to his sides.
I didn't answer, just gave a brief nod and let him lead me to the elevator on his arm. We kissed briefly in the elevator, laughing like teenagers with a secret.
"Why don't we grab a quick bite to eat, then head back to my place?" Castle suggested, turning me away from the row of cars parked out front of the station.
We wandered darkened streets that were never completely still. The city that never sleeps rolled on around us, but all I could think of was the man beside me. How he pulled me to him and kissed me under the light of a streetlamp.
It was the small moments I enjoyed most. When we weren't the detective and the author, not Beckett and Castle. We were just simply Kate and Rick, two people in love and unafraid to show it.
The 24hour diner was mostly empty when we walked in. It had the tacky 50's motif, but the food wasn't half bad. Probably the best we were going to find at the late hour. We both ordered, then the waiter left us in silence.
"What's with the serious face?" Castle asked, taking my hand. "You're off duty."
"Do you think we'll ever find them? It's just been so long," I sighed tiredly, leaning into Castle's shoulder.
"Hey now, we made real progress today. We've got some leads to look into. That one looks promising. Don't worry so much. Things have a way of working themselves out. You'll see," he said, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
The waiter appeared and set two milkshakes down in front of us. Suddenly we were back to being children. Castle took the end of his straw and painted chocolate milkshake on my nose, solely for the excuse of kissing it off and making me laugh. It wasn't long before the rest of our order arrived.
Our conversation turned to lighter topics as we finished our meal. Castle, predictably, tried to steal my fries when his own were gone and I ended up drinking more than half of his milkshake, despite my earlier arguments that vanilla was better than chocolate. We settled the tab and wandered back out into the night.
About a block from the diner, we were stopped by someone calling Castle's name. It wasn't uncommon for fans to stop him on the street, so we both turned around.
He got Castle first, before I could draw my gun. A quick syringe to the neck dropped Castle like a house of cards. Next came a quick disarming tactic that I recognized as something vaguely military, and then the sharp sting of a needle in my own neck. The last thing I heard as I lost consciousness was the man muttering 'you should have left it alone.'
The sound of a car stopping across the road pulled me from my memories and I was surprised to find the sun had faded to darkness and Ryan and Esposito walking across to meet me. There was a marked cruiser pulled up behind them, but the uniforms just leaned uninterestedly against their car.
"Hey Beckett, what are you up to?" Ryan asked, as they came to stop in front of me.
"How did you find me?" I asked, already suspecting the answer.
"Alexis called us, she was worried. And she told us about what happened today," Esposito said, bravely laying a hand on my shoulder.
"He's the one who did it," I murmured, flinching under the gentle touch. "Dick Coonan. 24C."
I handed them the wallet with the license in it and looked up at the windows again. Some were dark, but most had a light on.
"You're sure. I mean it was a… rough time," Esposito said as delicately as he could.
"I'd never forget that face or that voice. Not for as long as I live," I answered, not turning from the windows.
"Alright, we'll pick him up, but we can't hold him for long without hard evidence."
"I know," I nodded, letting Ryan lead me back to their car.
Esposito and the uniforms went up the arrest Coonan while Ryan sat me in the passenger seat of their car. It wasn't long before they appeared again, with Coonan in cuffs. My hands itched to be the one to be putting him in that car. His rights were on the tip of my tongue, waiting to escape.
"Hey Beckett, why don't you ride with us and we'll give you a lift back to the station. I think it's time you talked to the Captain," Esposito said, looking at his partner.
I nodded again, slightly confused, and Ryan got in the back seat while Esposito slid behind the wheel.
To Be Continued…
A/N: So I should have been studying for the three finals I have left this week, but I figured we all need a break. I took one and this is what happened. One chapter closer to finding out what happened to poor Castle. Hope everyone is still hanging around and waiting with baited breath… or just reading is good too. As always thanks to everyone who took the time to review, it means a lot. To my beta Kate, kudos for keeping me out of my head. --April