Author: Elizagoth

Word Count: 1,101

Rating: M (Adult subject matter)

Disclaimer: I own nothing in the following work of fiction.

It was an uneventful drive to the station. The marked cruiser followed behind us as we weaved in and out of traffic. At the precinct the uniforms led a glowering Coonan up into one of the interrogation rooms. Esposito and Ryan seemed ready to question me, no doubt about the suspicious black eye that I was sporting.

"Beckett, my office," Montgomery said, cocking his head in the direction of his door and cutting off any inquiry.

"Yes sir?" I asked, coming to stand in front of his desk.

"I was wondering when you'd come back for these," he said, pulling out my gun and shield.

"What?" I asked, confused.

I had quit the department, as far as I knew. What I remembered was turning over my badge and gun and walking out of the precinct.

"You were a good cop Beckett. The best I'd ever trained. Did you think I was going to just let you go?" he asked, leaning back in his chair. "I cashed in every favor I had and Mrs. Rogers pleaded the case with the Mayor. Officially you've been on an extended leave of absence. She convinced the Mayor that the last thing her son would have wanted was to see you quit the job you loved because of him. Of course there will be conditions that you must follow, before you can be put back in the field."

"And Coonan?" I asked, rapidly trying to process the information I'd just learned.

I realized how much I owed the man in front of me and Martha. More than I could ever hope to repay. There wasn't anything I could say. After what had happened with Castle, the fact that Martha would go to that trouble to stop me from making possibly the biggest mistake of my life was beyond what I could comprehend at that moment.

"This doesn't look like the field to me. Let Esposito take lead," Montgomery said, sliding the badge and gun across the desk.

My hands shook as I picked up the familiar holster and badge. I had left a part of me with Castle the day he died and another part here when I left my hardware behind. It felt a little like coming home. I just wished Castle was here to share it. He would whisper some smart quip in my ear and tell me to jump in and nail the bastard to the wall.

I went to walk out of the office when Captain Montgomery's voice stopped me.

"You desk is waiting for you," he said. "And Beckett?"

"Yes Sir?" I asked, turning to face him.

"You get one of these, ever. Don't make me regret my decisions."

"I won't Sir," I nodded, walking back out into the hall.

My eyebrows shot up when I caught sight of Alexis sitting in what used to be her father's chair at my desk. She was dressed for her grandmother's premiere and I sighed, knowing how disappointed she was going to be.

"Kate! There you are!" she said, standing and hugging me.

"You look great, Alexis."

"Ryan and Esposito told me about what happened. Did you really catch him?"

"It's complicated. Listen Sweetie, I'm not going to make it tonight. There's… a lot going on."

"I know. I just stopped by to bring you this," she said, pulling a duffle bag out from beside the chair. "Dr. Parish let me into your place. I thought you could use these more than a fancy dress. But I have to go. Gram will be upset if I miss the curtain. Go get him Kate, for Dad."

She hugged me again and headed out of the precinct as I watched. Frowning, I opened the bag and saw a familiar blue button-up shirt and black slacks. My old detective clothes. I hurried to the locker room to change.

Pulling off my sweater, I startled at the familiar voice behind me.

"Scout you're shaking."

I turned and there he was, leaning against the lockers and watching me closely.

"What if I can't do this?" I asked, hardly more than a whisper.

He pulled me into a hug, resting his chin on my head. For a moment we stood together as I held onto him. My hands fisted in the grey jacket he wore and I could smell cologne and laundry soap from his light blue shirt.

"You can and do you know why?"

I didn't answer, just shook my head against his chest.

"Because you have something he doesn't," he said, pulling me back so I could look in his eyes. "The truth. You know what happened and now it's time to write the beginning. Everyone needs to know how this chapter started."

"I'm not ready," I protested. "Going out there means remembering. What if I don't want to remember it. What if I can't handle it?"

What I didn't say was that closing this case meant losing another part of him. Another degree farther away from him. The thought tightened my chest painfully and I clutched his sleeves in a hard grip.

"You're Detective Kate Beckett. This is just another day at the office for you. I'll be waiting when you're finished."

Bolstered slightly by his confidence in me, I pulled the clothes from the bag. Each piece felt like a step closer to getting Detective Beckett back. First came the pants, then the shirt tucked into the pants. Every button was done up with a methodical slowness, preparing myself for what lay ahead.

Inside the bag I found a pair of my work heels and a makeup bag. Lanie had been thorough. Putting the shoes on and feeling my height boost those few inches was like a cloak of power falling over me. The proverbial Batman's cape. Another notch on my confidence meter.

I used the makeup to cover the black eye as best I could. It wasn't noticeable if one didn't care to look too close. Next I pulled my hair from the loose ponytail and brushed it to fall straight around my shoulders. Mask in place, check.

My gun was strapped to my hip, feeling the need to keep it old school. Finally my badge clipped to my belt. After all, what would a superhero be without their symbols?

I glanced up at the locker room mirror and saw Detective Beckett staring back. She looked a little thinner, a little worn around the edges, but she was there waiting for me to make the next move. Castle stood behind me, looking like he always had and for a moment it was as if nothing had changed. He was still my ever eager shadow, my partner, the love of my life.

"Aren't we pretty," he murmured, giving me a boyish grin in the mirror. "Now go get 'em Scout."

With one last resolute nod I stepped out of the locker room, ready to close this chapter of my life. Dick Coonan was the page that hadn't been written yet. The final loose end to so many of the mysteries of my past. He had the answers I needed and nothing was going to stop me from getting them.

To Be Continued…

A/N: Firstly let me apologize for the delay. It would appear that things are just beginning when you graduate from college. Job stuff is a bear, a million things to do and not enough hours in the day to do them. I hope everyone is still with me on this. Only a couple more chapters left, possibly an epilogue. I know y'all are dying to find out what happened to Castle (no pun intended). The next chapter will hopefully be up sooner than this one. There's a couple snags I still have to work out, but other than that it should be good to go. Thank you to everyone still reading. Muchos Gracias to those who take the time to leave a comment. Now back to my writing hermitage. Later days!