Chapter Three
"I need a better plan," James announced as he entered the dormitory he shared with his three friends.
"Always," Remus muttered from behind the book he was reading. "I should just give up on that."
"Huh?" James said stopping dead in the middle of the floor, a confused expression on his face.
"You always need a better plan," Remus clarified. "No matter how long you spend making up the ones you already have, you always need a better one. And I always give you the same suggestion, and it's the best plan you could possibly have, yet you never go with it."
"If it's the best plan," Sirius began slowly, "then why wouldn't he use it? And what is this plan you speak of, anyway?"
"Stop pranking people!" Remus exclaimed. "That's the best advice I can give you! And yet you never follow it."
"Well that explains it," Sirius said, going back to examining each Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Bean as he put them into his mouth, occasionally chucking them on the floor if he thought they looked suspicious. "Why would Prongsie—or anyone—want to stop pranking people? It's my favorite pastime!"
"Besides being a lazy bum, you mean," Peter put in.
"Well, duh," Sirius said as if it were obvious. Then, "Hey! I'm not a bum!"
"Back to what I was saying before you people all got so off track," James said suddenly, "I need a plan. A new plan; a better plan. And Moony, who ever said anything about pranking people? What does that have to do with the problem I have?"
"It has to do a lot with the problem I have," Sirius said, almost thoughtfully.
"What problem could you possibly have?" Remus asked Sirius as if he were crazy. "And crazy fangirls don't count. Neither do the girls who hate you because you dumped them and/or ditched them on a date. Of course, we've only just arrived at Hogwarts today, so I really don't see how you've already managed to divide the female population so distinctly."
"My problem," Sirius said, speaking over Remus, "Is that I don't have anybody to prank people with."
"Hey!" Peter protested, "I prank people with you!"
"What I need," Sirius said, blatantly ignoring Peter, "Is an equal. Someone with a vast expanse of knowledge regarding the delicate art of making other people's lives miserable. Someone who isn't afraid to break and bend the rules much more than occasionally. Someone who has an excuse ready at every turn and is quite gifted at getting out of detentions, yet equally able to receive a great number of such punishments in the hope of creating an unbreakable school record. It's hard to find people like that. And, you know, I used to have someone just like that," He looked pointedly at James here. "But he just had to give up that life of glory in favor of getting some girl to go out with him. Even though he knows it's totally pointless."
"Hey!" James protested. "It isn't totally pointless…well, maybe it is." He conceded after a moment's thought. "But that's why I'm here," He continued earnestly, "I need help thinking up a new plan for Lily to go out with me. The whole being nice and not pranking people and just generally making a huge personality change just really isn't working out for me. It's taking too long."
"James," Remus said sharply, putting his book down to reveal a huge frown upon his face. "It's the first time you've seen Lily in more than two months. Two months, I'd like to point out, which were spent doing a lot more planning than just being nice."
"He does have a point, you know," Sirius chimed in. "I, for one, really don't understand how you could forget the multitude of hours we spent in the grueling heat of the old tree house in your backyard."
"Where did you learn all of those words?" Remus demanded, looking baffled. "And how did you manage to use them correctly in that sentence?"
"It was a multitude of hours spent in the grueling heat of the old tree house in James' backyard with only a dictionary to amuse me." Sirius corrected himself. "And it was pure torture!"
"O-kay," Remus said slowly, before shaking his head and looking back towards James. "Like I was saying, you've only just gotten back to school—and Lily. You've had what, two conversations with her so far? Three, at the most? You need to give it some time for her to get adjusted to the change, otherwise those long hours in the grueling heat of that stupid tree house were a waste. I, personally, enjoy the nice, cool atmosphere of your bedroom, which you have totally soundproofed, anyway. So what was really the point of going out to that treehouse so that we 'wouldn't be interrupted or overheard?' Let me tell you: no point at all!"
James looked at his friends with an expression of worry upon his face. "You guys really need to learn how to not bottle up all of that anger. You need to let it all out in a timely fashion. It really helps relieve some stress, you know."
"Yeah, and it would also help if we just burned that tree house to the ground," Sirius muttered darkly.
"Ooh…sometimes, I like the way you think," Remus said, an expression upon his face that very clearly stated how very much he liked Sirius' plan.
"You guys are really starting to scare me," James said worriedly, backing slowly towards the doorway. "All I wanted was to know what I should do about getting Lily to finally like me."
"Just give it time," Peter offered as Sirius and Remus began conferring about the best spell to use to start a fire, which made James trip over himself trying to get to the door. "It's the only thing you've got, this far in the game!" He shouted after James as the black-haired boy bolted from the room.
Peter gave a slight shrug once James had disappeared, "Of course, the whole thing is probably pointless, anyway, but have fun with that…"
a/n-sorry for the long wait. I had internet problems...and then problems with my whole computer...and then I just decided that the whole world was against me, so, in short, I meant to have this up sooner. Again a big thanks to my beta, Rider Arya Svit-kona. So, I hope you all liked the chapter, and I'll try to update as soon as possible...maybe...depending on how the world continues to feel about me...please review!