Part Eight
We drive the whole way to Isabel's place with our hands linked. We don't really look at each other, or talk much, but it's nice just to sit and enjoy the feel of Max's large, warm hand in mine, as the movement of his thumb against the back of my hand sends small thrills up and down my arm. As we pull into the residence hall parking lot and Max puts the jeep in park, I turn to him quickly, needing to talk to him before we get out.
"Hey, um, do you think maybe we could just keep all this just between us for now?" I ask, gesturing to our linked hands as I speak. There's no immediate reaction from Max, so I continue to explain. "I mean, it's only been a few hours and – "
"Sure, Liz, of course," he nods with a smile. "I was actually going to ask you the same thing. I don't think I'm quite ready for Isabel to find out yet. God, can you imagine her reaction?" he grins.
A bubbly laugh erupts from my throat, as an image of Isabel squealing in surprise and running around hugging everyone enthusiastically, flits through my mind. "Yeah, I don't think I'm ready for that yet either," I tell him, but then remember something from the day before. "Hey, Max? What was going on between you and Isabel yesterday? You looked like you were arguing."
A puzzled frown mars his face, "Yesterday? What happened yest– ? Oh, that."
"Yes, that," I confirm.
"It was, um…you know what, can I tell you about it later? I don't really wanna get into it now."
"Yeah, sure," I'm a little disappointed that he won't tell me now, but there's not much I can do about it. "So, we better go meet the others," I say then. "They'll be waiting for us."
"Okay, let's go then, shall we?" replies Max, letting my hand slip from his so we can get out of the car.
I reach Max's side, as he is locking the door and I spot Isabel and Alex waiting for us in the same place as yesterday. Max obviously hasn't seen them yet though, because when I turn back to him, I find myself caught up in his intense stare.
"I really wanna kiss you right now," he murmurs seductively and at the tone of his voice, I almost give in right there and then. But Isabel and Alex are watching and I know I can't.
"I really wouldn't do that, Max." I tell him and his face falls, his brow furrowed in confusion. It's so adorable. "Your sister is standing right over there," I indicate in her direction with my head and an expression of understanding replaces the confused look.
"Oh, right. Maybe not then." He looks over to Isabel and gives her a small wave. "Come on, we better get over there," he says and then turns, starting to walk over to them. I watch him for a second before I follow. Unable to stop myself, I find my eyes drawn to his backside. It's very cute. How on Earth did I not notice how nice it was before? How nice his whole body was? I've always known that he works out, 'to impress the ladies' as he told me when I questioned him on it back in sophomore year. Well, let me tell you, now that I'm finally sitting up and paying attention, I'm definitely impressed.
Wow, how weird does that sound? I'm talking about my best friend here! Well, my best friend and more, it seems now.
"Liz, are you coming?" Max's impatient voice breaks me out of my trance and I feel my cheeks grow hot. I raise my eyes up to his face; he's standing several metres away.
"Y-yeah, I'm coming," I call back to him and move to catch up.
"Hey," he murmurs out of the side of his mouth as I reach his side and we begin walking together. "Were you just checking me out?" I can see the confident smirk tugging at his lips, but I can't bring myself to look at him fully. So, I keep my eyes fixed on Isabel and Alex straight ahead of us. However, I can't help the smile that plays on my lips and I know he sees it. At the edge of my vision, I can see the smirk growing into a full-fledged grin.
"I knew it," he murmurs back, but I'm too embarrassed to look at him.
We reach Isabel and Alex and are met with suspicious grins. I realise that they probably saw our somewhat strange interaction by the car and are probably jumping to conclusions. The right conclusions, I might add; but we have agreed not to say anything to either of them before we're ready and I'm not about to confess to anything. Luckily, all we get is a knowing look from Isabel and a smug grin from Alex when they greet us, and as Isabel links arms with me and drags me off to discuss last night's dinner, I breathe a sigh of relief.
At least Max and I won't have to worry about acting normal around each other for a while.
Day 21 – Sunday July 14th 2002
I'm not sure I can effectively describe how wonderful I'm feeling at the moment. I spent the entire day walking around with a huge, silly grin on my face and no amount of self-restraint could stop it.
It's kind of strange really. Now that Max knows how I feel and he's confessed his feelings to me, it's almost like we're just noticing each other for the first time. Even though we've already kissed and admitted feelings, it's as if we're going right back to the flirty stage, the part that usually happens before the first kiss and confessions of love. And for the most part, we've definitely passed the 'getting to know you' part of the relationship. It's weird; our entire relationship is completely backwards!
All day long, Max and I have been exchanging these discreet glances and secret looks. I feel like I'm back in junior high again, getting goose bumps whenever my big crush so much as looks in my direction, but really, I love it. It feels good to be the centre of Max's attention, and I don't just mean in a best-friends, we're-the-only-two-people-on-this-trip kind of way. I mean, he's been looking at me the same way he used to look at Jenna, his first crush in high school, when he thought no one was looking; and it warms my heart…
"So, am I ever going to find out what you write about in there?"
I'm pulled out of my daydreaming by Max's half-whiny, half-amused tone. I put my pen down, settling back into the comfy chair by the window and grin at him smugly, "Nope."
He puts on a mock-offended look, "No? After everything that's happened between us, you're still saying no?"
"That's right. I mean, maybe you don't wanna know what I'm writing; after all, I could be critiquing your kissing technique."
His face pales at my words and I cover a smirk. Ha. That's got him worried; serves him right for being nosy.
He gives me a crestfallen look, "You think I'm a bad kisser?" he pouts and I roll my eyes.
But that wounded expression is all it takes and in an instant, I've sauntered across the room and have come to a stop at the edge of his bed, where he's perched on the edge.
His legs part slightly and I step between them. Cupping his face in my hands, I lean down and just before our lips touch I whisper, "I definitely do not think you are a bad kisser, Max Evans. In fact, I think you're probably the best kisser ever."
I watch as his eyes light up and then quickly darken as his arms snake round my waist, pulling me closer. "Well then, I guess I'll – " but he doesn't get any further as we both give into temptation and our lips meet in a passionate embrace. My head spins as I feel Max's tongue part my lips and slip inside my mouth, whilst his hands caress my lower back.
Wow, I think I could get used to this feeling.
We're both breathing heavily when we finally pull apart and Max lets his head drop against my chest, but I'm suddenly in a playful mood and urge him to scoot up onto the bed so his back rests against the headboard. With a mischievous smirk, I climb onto the bed after him and wrapping my arms around his neck, I lift myself onto his lap so that I'm straddling him. Unable to resist, I lean down to nibble on the side of his neck and his arms come around me once again.
"So, Evans," I say lightly, between small kisses. "How far exactly have you gone with a girl before?"
I feel him stiffen slightly under me and immediately worry that I've offended him with my question, but one glance at his lowered head tells me that he's embarrassed more than anything else.
"Hey," I lift his chin so that his eyes meet mine. "You can tell me. I'm not gonna laugh, or make fun of you, or think differently about you. I'm just genuinely curious," I tell him, with a small smile.
He holds my gaze for a second before his eyes shift. "I guess I'm just not used to talking with you about this stuff; it feels kind of weird," he admits.
"I know it does, and I guess that's to be expected, considering," I say. "Okay, how about this – I'll tell you something about me and then you can decide if you wanna tell me something about you?"
"Okay," he agrees quietly, but he looks as if he's not sure he wants to know what I've done. He needn't worry, I'm not gonna make him feel bad about his own experience, or lack thereof.
"Okay," I grin. "Here goes. You're the only person who's ever made me feel light-headed and dizzy just by kissing me," I tell him, watching as a look of both wonder and disbelief crosses his face.
"S-same here," he whispers.
An elated grins breaks out on my face. "Really? You feel like that too?" His smile is the only answer I need and we share a meaningful look before I continue.
"You're also the only guy I ever wanted to spend all my time with. With Kyle, I could only take a few hours at a time, but you…well I've thoroughly enjoy the last three weeks sharing a room with you."
His response is to capture my lips in a heated kiss. "Me too," he murmurs when he pulls away and I can't wipe the smile off my face as I prepare to tell him something else.
"Okay, time to dig a little deeper now," I pause for a second to think. "I've never performed oral sex on a guy before."
At first, he looks shocked by my bluntness, but then a sly grin spreads across his face. "Me neither." I playfully punch his arm. "Okay, okay, I'll be serious," he says, but then he looks down. When he brings his head up again, I see the uncertainty in his features. "I, um…I have," he states and for a second, I wonder what he means by that; but then it dawns on me.
"You have? But…I mean…"
"Hey, just because I haven't gone all the way, doesn't mean I'll deny my girlfriend the pleasure she deserves," he defends. "Besides, it was only once and I was a little drunk at the time."
"Oh," I can't help feeling a little jealous and I can't stop the next question from spilling out of my mouth. "Who was it? I – I mean…" I trail off embarrassed.
He shakes his head slightly, "It was Tess. She asked me to and I wasn't sure at first, but you know, I wasn't being fair on her by not wanting to sleep with her and, well, why should she have to go without because of that?" he reasons.
Although, to me it doesn't sound like he did it for the right reasons, my heart gives a tug at his thoughtfulness and I lean forward to kiss his lips softly before moving along his jaw line and back down to his neck. I'm interrupted however, by his next question.
"Has anyone ever, you know, done that to you?" his voice is almost timid and I smile against his warm skin.
I straighten up again so that I'm looking at him, "Well, almost," I smother a small giggle at the memory and Max looks puzzled. "It was after one of Kyle's big games and we went back to his place; but he was so exhausted that he only got as far as my stomach before he completely passed out!" I roll my eyes and Max bursts out laughing, before quickly covering his mouth with his hand.
"Sorry, I just got a weird mental picture; I didn't mean to offend you, or – "
"Hey, no worries," I cut him off. "It was pretty funny actually. And you know what? I'm glad he fell asleep, because I'm not sure I really wanted him to actually do it," I send him another smile, which he returns and then studies me with a pleased expression
"So, I guess you're still a virgin in that area, then?" he muses. "Hey, that's one-up for me in that department!"
The pleased-little-boy look on his face both makes me laugh and sends a thrill through my body, simultaneously. "Yeah, I guess it is," I grin, tightening my arms around his neck. "And, you know, now it's up to you to remedy that," I whisper just before our lips meet again.
"Oh, I intend to," he mumbles between kisses. "I definitely intend to."
Day 22 – Monday July 14th 2002
We said goodbye to Isabel and Alex this morning and now we've decided to drive all the way across the country to the East coast. We drove for eight hours today and have stopped for the night at a motel on the side of the road somewhere near Barstow, CA. Just for fun, and because it's not too far from here, we're going to drive up to Las Vegas tomorrow. I know that we're only eighteen and so can't legally do any of the things that Vegas is famous for, but we don't care – it'll still be fun to take in the atmosphere.
Then on Wednesday, we'll carry on Eastwards along the I40, until we reach the coast. Our main destination is New York City, but we're going to try to visit as much of the area as we can. Max has promised that we'll make a stop at Harvard so he can see the campus and where I'll be living in the Fall.
Just thinking about going off to college and leaving Max in New Mexico is making me all choked up. It was bad enough before when he was just my best friend, but now that we're together, the prospect of living thousands of miles from him is almost unbearable…
I can't help it, a small hiccupping sob escapes my mouth as I think about how miss I going to miss everyone when I leave, my parents, my friends and most importantly, Max.
At the unexpected noise in the relative silence of the room, Max's head snaps up from the road map of the United States that he's studying and looks in my direction, a concerned expression on his face.
"Hey, Lizzie, what's wrong?" he asks.
I shake my head, covering my mouth with my hand. "It's…It's nothing," I finally manage.
His face softens, "Something's obviously up. Come here," he puts down the map and stretches his arms out to me.
I sigh and try to wipe away the few lone tears that have fallen from my eyes. "Okay," I sniff.
I close my journal and make my way over to him. I reach his bed and curl up at his side, feeling his arms come around me as I settle down against him.
"So, what's up?" he asks as he rubs my arms comfortingly.
"It's silly," I dismiss. "I was just thinking about what happens when we get home. You're still gonna be in New Mexico, studying at UNM and I'm gonna be on the other side of the country. It's just so far away from everyone, from you…" I trail off sadly.
"I know," he whispers consolingly. "I know. It'll be hard, but we'll get through it, okay. No matter what happens between us, I'm your friend first and I always will be." His words make me smile. "I've been thinking about it too. About how I'm going to survive at UNM, knowing that you're living it up at one of the best schools in the country, meeting all these charming, smart guys. I mean, how am I supposed to compete against Harvard men?"
I lift my head to look at him. He's staring at the opposite wall, his jaw twitching with concealed emotion. "Max, there is no way any Harvard guy could ever live up to you in my eyes, so please don't worry; I'll be spending all my time missing you," I tell him, placing a kiss to the underside of his jaw. "And what about all those girls at UNM? You're not the only one who can get jealous, you know."
His eyebrows rise as if this is the first time he's even considered it and it reassures me. "No danger of anything happening there, Lizzie. You'll always be on my mind too."
His arms tighten around me and I relax back against him.
"Can…can I sleep here tonight, Max?" I ask timidly.
He looks down at me in surprise, "Here? As in…?"
"Yeah," I confirm.
"Sure. No problem," he smiles warmly, placing a kiss on my forehead. "How about we get changed and then we can watch a movie or something?"
"Okay," I smile and leave his arms to get ready for bed.
Ten minutes later, we're both dressed in grey T-shirts and black shorts (well, Max is in boxers) and we both laugh when we see each other's attire.
"We look like twins!" I exclaim, between giggles.
"Yeah, well, you are wearing one of my shirts," he retorts. I look down and realise that he's right. He lent me his favourite T-shirt a couple of years back when I got caught in the rain walking over to his house and I kind of adopted it after that. "And it's one of my favourites as well."
"Well, it can't have been that important to you, considering you went straight out and bought another one," I say, indicating the shirt he's currently wearing.
He looks down at his shirt too, and then concedes, rolling his eyes, "Oh, okay. Fair enough."
I grin triumphantly as we get into his bed. Max begins flicking through the TV channels as he puts his arm around me and I relax against him. There are no good movies on, so we finally settle on watching reruns on Nick at Nite. We sit in silence for a while, absorbed in the show. My mind begins to wander however, when I feel Max's fingers tracing small patterns on my arm and I think back to everything that has happened over the last couple of days. I sign in contentment and I'm just about to lower my head to rest on his shoulder, when a thought occurs to me.
"Max?" I straighten slightly.
"Hmm?" he replies absently, not taking his eyes off the screen.
"You never told me what you and Isabel were talking about the other day," I say.
"Hmm," he mumbles again. I roll my eyes. He's not listening.
"Oi," I shrug off his arm and give him a playful shove. "I'm talking to you."
"Hey!" he cries, rubbing his sore shoulder and frowning at me. "What was that for?"
"I'm trying to talk to you, and you're not even paying attention!" I exclaim, in mock annoyance.
"Well, I was trying to watch…" he glances at the TV. "…The Cosby Show." I snort and his expression becomes apologetic. "Okay, I'm sorry. I wasn't listening to you. What were you saying?"
"I was saying," I start in exasperation, although I'm not really that annoyed with him. "That you never told me what was going on with you and Isabel on Saturday."
"Oh," he says, looking back at the TV again. "It's actually a bit embarrassing…" he trails off.
"Come on, Evans," I tease, trying to get him to lighten up. "Spit it out."
He takes a breath, closing his eyes as he does so. "Isabel knows how I feel about you," he blurts out and I feel my eyes widening at his statement; he was right, this is embarrassing. "She was nagging me about when I was going to tell you the truth." He opens his eyes and looks at me, trying to gauge my reaction.
"She…she knows?" I stutter, shocked that both she and Alex already seemed to know what Max and I have only just admitted to each other. "H-How long for?"
"A while," he admits.
"Wow, so everyone else seemed to see what we couldn't," I say in wonder.
Max looks up at me again. "Everyone else?"
I sigh. "When Isabel was talking to you on Saturday, Alex asked me almost exactly the same thing. He wanted to know if we'd gotten together yet."
I glance back at Max to find him watching me with wide eyes. "A-and what did you say?"
I give a small snort, "I basically asked him what he was on and told him that it was never going to happen." Max's face falls slightly and I rush to reassure him. "No, Max, I just couldn't believe that he'd just voiced the one thing that had been on my mind the last few days. It threw me," I tell him and his expression relaxes again. "Besides, look what happened just a few hours later."
He grins down at me and the next thing I know, our lips are meeting in a brief, but emotion-filled kiss. When we break apart, however, Max has a puzzled look on his face.
"Did you notice anything strange with Alex and Izzy this weekend?" he asks and my stomach drops.
"What are you talking about?" I feign innocence, hoping that he hasn't guessed the seriousness of their relationship, since I promised Alex I wouldn't tell him anything.
"Don't you think they seemed more relaxed and at ease with each other?" I shrug and he continues. "And what was going on with Alex already being at her building when we arrived every day?" He fixes me with a penetrating stare and I force myself not to fidget under it.
"Maybe he just likes being early," I suggest, but I don't think Max buys it.
He shakes his head slightly, "No, it's something else." He's watching me closely and I try to be inconspicuous by studying my nails, but out of the corner of my eye, I can see his eyes narrowing suspiciously. "You know, don't you?"
"I don't know anything," I shake my head, but I can't bring myself to look at him.
Max tears his gaze away from me, glancing round the room. "Oh, God. They're sleeping together, aren't they? That's why he was always there," he says in disbelief. "And that's why he wouldn't let me take him back to his hotel room. He didn't have one!" he exclaims in realisation. "God, how could I have been so stupid!" He turns to me again, "And why are you not saying anything about this?"
I curse under my breath. "Max, I…" but I can't think of a good excuse. I sigh, "I promised Alex that I wouldn't tell you. But you seem to have figured it out for yourself, so I guess that's not relevant anymore."
He lets out a growl, "God, I'm gonna kill him!"
I put a hand on his arm. "Max, calm down. You can't get all worked up about this. It's Isabel's life and she's capable of making her own decisions," I tell him. "Besides, she doesn't seem to be against the idea of us being together. Can't you just be happy for her and support her choices?"
He sighs and runs a hand over his face. "I guess I don't have much choice, do I?" he says bitterly
"Hey, don't be like that," I plead softly. "Just because she's your sister, it doesn't mean that she needs you protecting her all the time. You like Alex; he's your friend. Wouldn't you rather Isabel ended up with him than with some random guy?"
He crosses his arms over his chest and slumps sulkily, "Yeah, I guess," he admits grudgingly, but I can tell that he knows I'm right.
I can't help the smile that spreads across my face at the sight of him. He looks like a sulking kid who didn't get his way and usually I would just ignore his mood, but for some reason, right now I think he looks hot.
God! What is wrong with me? It's like everything he does just turns me on.
I can't stop myself and the next thing I know, my lips are on his, nibbling and teasing at his mouth. I can't pull away immediately, I don't want to and the kiss is only broken when we both run out of air. I stare at him for a moment, breathing heavily, our lips barely a centimetre apart, before relaxing back at his side. I concentrate my attention on the TV screen in an attempt to get myself under control.
"Wow," breathes Max. "What was that for?"
I keep my eyes staring straight ahead as I answer him, "Not sure really, I just couldn't help it," I manage.
His arm comes around me once again. "Well, anytime you feeling like doing it again, feel free to go right ahead," he tells me with a smirk.
I let out a deep, contented breath as I settle against his side.
"Oh, I will, don't worry."
TBC…