I don't own TMNT.

It Was Never Meant To Be.

Raph stood in solemn silence far from the still and silent form on the bed. His mind was bouncing back and forth inside his head, ricocheting from the laughing form he'd seen minutes before inside his own mind and the still life below. It was just wrong, not that he was saying that life wasn't fair, that was all too true, but this, this was just wrong. Yes, that was the best he could think up at the moment. The loud silence was unnerving. He tried looking at the room, the scattered bits and pieces lying around all over the floor but his eyes were on that white sheet that was draped across one of the two cots in the room. His eyes bore into the sheet, trying to see the being beneath it without having to move it.

"This isn't right," Raph thought as he took a step towards the sheet.

"Isn't right," he repeated in his head as he took another

"Isn't right..."

He took another step.

"Isn't right…"

And another step.

"Isn't right…"

Another step.

"Not right," he mumbled as his hand fell upon the sheet.

There was no sudden jerking movement beneath his fingertips. As he pulled slightly at the sheet, he listened harder than he ever had before in his life. He just wanted to hear a surprised gasp, or an annoyed sigh, heck he'd love a lecture right now. But as the pale white covering slipped from the side of the cot and fell to the floor, the truth simply hit him as if he had been shot with a bullet, no, an arrow. It was longer and could be used again after easily being pulled from the victim. Raph looked over the form of his older brother, searching for something. Something he just didn't know about but something knew he had to find out. A bloody fingerprint on Leo's neck was the evidence and proof of where Don had constantly checked for a pulse. The deceased's mouth hung open slightly, no doubt Don had checked for breath time and time again.

How long had it been?

Raph glanced at the nearest clock that was mounted on the wall.

2:00am

He wasn't sure how long he had been unconscious but hadn't it been just dawn when they left Winters Corp? So around fourteen hours…

Fourteen hours, without a brother. Without Leo…

Raph's throat seemed to close in on itself as he struggled to breathe through his constricted airway. He leaned over the…he gulped thinking the word…corpse and set a hand on Leo's-well the corpse's forehead. The skin was ice cold. This was so strange, they were retiles with warm blood and this ice feeling belonged elsewhere. Raph's gaze went back to the bloody fingerprint, It had to have been someone else's blood, because Leo hadn't been bleeding.

"So what did happen?" the red masked turtle asked the empty air.

Raph hadn't stuck around long enough to figure out what had truly happened to his older brother. He sighed and let his hand, that was resting on Leo's forehead, slide down over his face.

Then, he felt a twitch beneath his hand. Breaths harder and harder to take and eyes searching desperately he tore his hand away, looking, searching for- Then he growled at the sight of a fly on Leo's eyelid. He flicked the insect away and flung a fury of curses at it.

"Great, now I'm blowing up at a bug!" he thought and sighed.

He wasn't sure what was more harmful, never having that hope or having it for a moment and watching it die away. For a moment it remained him of when they all had been out on a patrol, during a rainstorm. After a battle Raph would glance at an overhang, a roof or a pipe, there would always be one drop or condensation, struggling to hold onto an edge, more drops would fall, weighing the drop down until it lost its grip and fell onto the asphalt below, running over the embedded stones until it reached a drain and fell into the sewers the turtles called home. Their lives seemed like that now, all the responsibilities and hardships on one turtle, until one made him let go. And all that was left, was the corpse lying in front of the lone, red masked turtle

He thought, that maybe he should yell, should scream and curse his older brother for leaving him AGAIN! But watching the still form, Raph only felt sick as those thoughts circled around in his head. Besides, he was never one for words. That was Leo's department. Words meant so much to the eldest, but Raph despised this. He preferred actions, they weren't confusing like words were. Words could and often did have secret meanings. Even certain words had more than one meaning.

Any word could mean anything.

Love could mean, admiration, lust, affection. And it could be friendship love, family love, relationship love, or it could be dislike in a sarcastic tone, or it could be hate in disguise. You never got a strait answer.

Raph's eyes went back to the clock.

3:00am

He had been here for an hour. Hmm…he hadn't noticed.

The red masked turtle just stood there for another long minute, before he reached out and rested his hand on Leo's cheek, the skin was still ice cold, and that sudden shock was like a bullet traveling through Raph's chest, his knees hit the ground and his head fell forward, his eyes on the cold stone floor. No, he couldn't break down here, he couldn't break down again. His pride wouldn't allow him to shed anymore tears and he was too angry at the world to care. He wanted to yell at Leo but that thought made him angry, because Leo wouldn't hear him and that just proved that this was a challenge he couldn't overcome. You couldn't beat death.

Or could you? Was it possible? Some people claimed they beat death, but was it true? Maybe it wasn't that people kept fighting that incoming darkness but that death itself got annoyed or irritated and didn't want to do his job. Maybe he was this all seeing being, or maybe he was human enough to sometimes show compassion.

Raph took three deep breaths and whispered to the empty air, "He's dead. He's really dead."

A wave of some strange emotion washed over the red masked turtle as he shakily climbed to his feet, it felt, for some strange reason, like it was gold, or maybe a golden light. What was this?

Acceptance?

Enlightenment?

Both?

Whatever it was Raph found himself slightly smiling. So it was both, life was precious and he could accept death right now. Yeah, he could and everything was going to be ok. He straitened up and glanced towards the closed door. Yes, he decided. He'd help his little brothers now, like he always should have.

The turtle with the accepting smile, began to turn

And felt a flinch under his fingertips.

Whew, ok we're at the end-

Of the quote.

Don't worry, there's still one chapter left. After all this quote isn't the only quote I'm using and I think people will like the last chapter. Sorry this chapter's so short but I just had to end it there.

Reviews please?

Oh and some news, if anyone's read my one-shot 'For Treasures You Hold Close" I have a poll on my profile asking if I should make it a story or not. I've only gotten one vote so far so I'm asking people to please vote.

Thank you!

The final chapter will be posted soon.

~Moonsetta