AN: FINALLY. That's probably what everyone's thinking, right? Haha, sorry guys. FF was seriously screwy tonight and my beta couldn't get the finished copy back to me so I could upload it. My apologies. Better late then never, right..? Haha... But anyway; YOU. GUYS. ARE. AWESOME. I've NEVER had better reviews and PMs come for a story chapter than I had come for chapter 7 :) I was a little worried about everyone's reactions at first, but apparently everyone loved it! :D Glad to hear about the tears.. On a 'worse' note, I can promise you; there will be plenty more to come. ;)
Oh; and I've had a lot of people PM me as a thanks for replying to their reviews. So, just puttin it out there; if you wanna have a chat or you have something about the story you wanna ask or you just wanna be friends, hit me up on msn :) ashley(dot)mcneilhotmail(dot)com. :) Enjoy!
It was four o'clock. Then it was five. Before Seth knew it it was ten that night and Jesus Christ where the fuck was his sister?!
The storm had reared its ugly, terrifying head again and rain hit the windowpanes like a stone's throw. It had been nice earlier that day, like in the morning hours... Seth had been hoping that if his sister had taken shelter somewhere from the storm overnight, she'd use the temporary break to haul her ass back home. No such luck. Now the storm was in full swing again; every two minutes lightning lit up the sky and thunder shook the house; the television had been knocked out for an hour now and even a few phone lines were down.
This was the second day; the second day now that Leah had been gone. No answers from phone calls, no text messages back... He was starting to freak. As in pace-by-phone and stare-out-windows freak. (Not piss-his-pants freak yet, but he got a feeling that if the phone rang once more and it wasn't Leah he just might.)
Well apparently it wasn't a lucky day for more than one Clearwater as the phone rang for like the hundredth time and Seth could feel hope coiling in his heart and belly, when inside he knew it wouldn't be her for some reason and that thought strangled him. Eyeing the caller ID he groaned and picked up the receiver.
"She's not home yet Sam."
"Goddammit." His Alpha hissed. "Any word from her at all? Has anyone seen her? I went looking by myself for a few hours earlier today and I trekked the border all the way up to Port Angeles again but there was no sign-"
"No." Hearing himself say the word caused Seth so much grief he felt like doubling over. Instead the younger sibling sighed deeply and scrubbed a clammy palm down his face. "Sam, I'm really starting to get worried. Leah only stayed out overnight once before and even when she was that mad she still called.. I don't know what to do man, I'm drivin' myself crazy." Once again for like the zillionth time, Seth reran images of Leah in situations no person should ever find themselves in. Leah being kidnapped, Leah getting attacked by a bloodsucker when her back was turned, Leah getting shot-
Seth jumped at the sound of another hideous bolt of lightning lighting up his dingy living room. (Yeah; lights were out too.)
"Seth? Are you okay?" Sam asked. Sighing the youngest Clearwater nodded.
"Yeah.. I'm okay.."
"I know you're worried Seth; we all are."
"Really? Are you?" Seth gritted his teeth. "What about Paul? Has that prick said anything?" Seth had to suppress a growl. "Has he done a goddamn thing to make up for what he did?"
"He's been looking too. Look I'll tell you the same thing I told you and Jacob last night-"
"Don't bother Sam.. Look I know Paul's just a dick alright it's just the fact that my sister is still not fucking home and I'm bouncing off the goddamn walls wondering if she's okay!" Seth could barely believe the ferocity that shone through in his own words. He had never been this worried about Leah before.
The other end of the phone line was silent for a moment, and Seth wondered if Sam had lost his line connection.
"I'm scared too." Sam's low murmur came as a surprise.
Seth blinked. He was about to ask Sam why his sister's ex-boyfriend sounded so indeed overly concerned when Sam spoke up again.
"Look, we shouldn't stay on the phones for long.. She might be trying to call one of us."
'Yeah. Like she'd call you if she was in trouble.' Seth thought, but he nodded to himself anyway. "Okay. I'll call you if she comes home." With that he hung up the phone.
Barely a minute passed; more thunder, and more ringing.
"Seth?" It was Jake this time of course. Like it had been on and off the last thirty times his second Alpha called. "Is she-"
"No Jake she's not home. I'm supposed to leave the line open, see yah." Seth hung up.
His cell vibrated. 'Oh for the love of...' Seth didn't even bother to look at it since it was obviously Jake. He still found himself glancing anyway in the hopes that it would be Leah- No sir, Jake.
why'd yeh hang up? Seth rolled his eyes and dropped his phone onto the coffee table. He knew Jake was a caring guy; and it was obvious to everyone, of course, how Sam still had feelings for Leah. He cared about her a lot. But this, this was strange behavior. Leah would run off before and they hadn't so much as batted an eyelash out their doors to look for her. Why were they suddenly so interested in his sister's safety?
With a sigh (which was becoming strangely addictive to all members of the Clearwater household) Seth found himself walking, almost timidly back over to the window. It looked even worse than what it had a few minutes before. This time the picnic table they kept out back for fires was turned over. His teeth pulled his bottom lip between them in pure stress. Fuck, it was bad..
'Please be okay, sis. Please come home.'
-
Jake listened to the floorboards creak underneath his own massive weight as he continuously paced back and forth, right and left, eyes hardly straying from the picture window in his living room. The Clearwater household was only a few minutes down the street from the Black's and he knew that if Leah came walking home, he'd be the first one to see her walking down the beaten path.
He hadn't seen so much as a squirrel out that night. It was depressing, and worrying, and.. Infuriating! Jake hoped to hell and back that his previous Beta was okay. He hoped the kiss they'd shared two days before wasn't one of the reasons she'd run off besides Paul's dick move.
He was angry, because, inside, Jake knew he should've bolted out that door the moment she did. He'd outrun and equaled Leah before; if he tried hard enough he could of caught her before the wind and the rain destroyed her trail. He shouldn't of brushed it off as just another one of Leah's pointless episodes.
Gulping down an unwelcome knot in his throat, Jake turned his head and cast a look to his father's door. Billy had been talking to Sue earlier, before he went to bed, and even Leah's own mother wasn't that worried. In fact, despite the storm, she invited Charlie over for a candlelight dinner.
'She runs off all the time,' Sue had said, 'just give her time to cool down and she'll slink back home eventually.'
It made Jake wanna put a fist through the window, which was so bravely holding its own against the beating rain. He liked Sue yes, but indeed he knew when enough was enough. Inside Jake always thought Leah was too much of a cunt towards Sam and Emily, but at the same time he knew that when she'd needed her mom the most, Sue had run right to Emily's side instead. It was made worse by the fact that Harry was gone. He was Leah's rock; it held her steady.
It seemed like nowadays Sue was all too willing to let her daughter go too, the same way her husband had. And the Clearwater fights got even worse once Charlie came into the picture.
With a shake of his head Jake upset the thoughts. He wasn't pacing by the window at nearly two AM because of stupid family problems that could be fixed with a quick hug; he was there because the thought of Leah, out alone in that storm terrified the shit out of him.
Rubbing a sore muscle in his left arm that he'd pulled two days ago (trying to hold Seth back from kicking Paul's ass), Jake found himself sighing and letting his eyes slip from the window to the floor. He should've let Seth beat Paul's stupid face. It would've served him right, definitely.
Next time Jacob glanced at his cell phone time, where Seth still hadn't texted him back, another twenty minutes had passed by while he was in thought. With a sigh he shoved it down into his PJ pants pocket and turned away from the window. The poor boy could feel exhaustion wearing away at his body and he knew that not sleeping and starving himself wasn't going to bring Leah home, so he headed for his bedroom and crawled into bed.
Inside, he prayed for her safety. Inside, he knew he didn't love her; but he wished she'd come home just so he could say he had the chance to kiss her again.
The wind howled strong.
-
With a sigh, Sam kicked the covers off and sat up in bed, swinging his legs over the side and rubbing at his eyes. Looking at the dingy screen of his cell phone, Sam could see that it was just pass four-thirty AM and he still hadn't gotten a wink of sleep that night.
How could he?... She was gone. Leah was still missing, and he was so racked with guilt and the fact that there was nothing he could do just made it all the worse. He looked over at the radio, lowly playing and wondered if anyone else was up that he knew of, that still had electricity.
Mama told me, when I was young.
Said 'sit beside me, my only son.
And listen closely, to what I say.
And if you do this, it'll help you,
Some sunny day.'
He could barely hear the song over the anger of the wind. He sighed. He was a prick. Sam Uley, so-called 'King of La Push' was a degrading, self-hating prick. He hated the fact that he had broken two women.
Looking over his shoulder, he saw Emily sleep. Asleep on her side, her good side upwards, letting the scars kiss the pillow.
Scars he'd made. Leah's emotional damage.. It was like he'd taken a hacksaw to Emily and injected poison into Leah. Both of which, extensions of himself. Extensions he never thought he was capable of ever using, ever doing.. Those acts seemed more accustomed to his deadbeat father.
'Oh take your time; don't live too fast.
Troubles will come; and they will pass.
Go find a woman; you'll find love.
And don't forget son, there is someone
Up above.'
What he'd done had never been in Sam's plans for life at all. He'd tried so goddamn hard to be different. But fate still fucked him and it made him so friggen angry he could up and leave everything he'd suffered so much to build; but at the same time it made him so sad, that he could put a pistol to his temple and decide he wouldn't be anybody's problem anymore.
Sam knew he'd found love; he didn't know if he returned it. Running a hand through his hair he pursed his lips. He thought he did... He thought he loved Emily. But worrying so much about Leah, and judging by how much he'd craved her presence and started noticing her so much in the last few months made him seriously wonder; seriously rethink.
Life was simple; he wanted it to be simple again.
'And be a simple kind of man.
Be something, you love and understand.
Baby be a simple kind of man;
Won't you do this, for me son, if you can?'
Thinking back to that pistol, Sam remembered his guiltiest of thoughts. The thought that put the gun in his hand and his finger on the trigger. 'I want them both.'
He'd wanted to die. Sam had been denying it to himself but facing it made him realize. He always had to keep Leah around because she was his true love; not an imprinting disaster. Emily was the rope that kept him secured to the earth, and fate had made him live for her but he didn't really want to. Well, fate sort of made him want to.
He wanted both of them, with him all the time. He wanted to keep them hurting so they were marked by him and him only, always.
'Forget your lust, for the rich man's gold.
All that you need, is in your soul.
And you can do this, oh baby.. If you try.
All that I want for you my son, is to be satisfied.'
He couldn't let either of them go. Emily didn't want to let him go; he was fine with that, he didn't really want to let her go either; fate's fault. But Leah.. Leah wished desperately for some reprieve from his thoughts and actions towards her.
But it was Leah, now that he realized it, that he would fight for the most.
'And be a simple kind of man.
Be something, you love and understand.
Baby be a simple kind of man;
Won't you do this, for me son, if you can?'
Oh yes I will.
The lyrics seemed like words right out of his mother's mouth when she made him promise Sam Uley would never become Joshua Uley.
Now look what had happened..
'Boy, don't you worry; you'll find yourself.
Follow your heart; and nothing else.
And you can do this, oh baby; if you try.
All that I want for you my son, is to be satisfied.'
'And be a simple kind of man.
Be something, you love and understand.
Baby be a simple kind of man;
Oh won't you do this for me son, if you can?'
Sam knew he wasn't going to sleep that night. He probably wouldn't sleep at all 'til she was home. Where she belonged.
By him.
He sighed, opening the drawer of his nightstand and pulling out a picture. He and Leah were on first beach, his arms locked around her thin hips and her head rested in the crook of his neck; his lips pressed to her cheek. They looked so happy. She was wearing his necklace.
Emily came to visit two days later.
'Baby be a simple.. Be a simple man.
Be something you love and understand.
Baby be a simple kind of man.'
'Where she belongs,' Sam thought bitterly. 'I wish I had that gun right about now.'
The wind screamed ferocity stronger than ever.