MS: My friends, the long hard road is coming to an end. All that's left after this is chapter 25 and an Epilogue... Then it's summer and then maybe a 'sequel' of sorts :) But anywho; back to the pressing concern that this longass journey is actually ending. My beta was so upset when she sent me the new chapter lol... We've certainly had a time, haven't we guys? It hasn't always been good.. Hell I don't think it's ever been good :p But it's the lessons learned and the feelings felt that bring life to a story. Now; ladies and gents, I have a favor to ask of all of you for your own benefit. Speaking of the sequel I mentioned above, there's a journal entry relating to it that I will post in a few minutes. Please go check that out after you read this. If it's not up by then just make sure you go back and read it later. Might have a new poll up too so check that out. Now.. Try and 'enjoy' this.. Probably won't.

It was cool against her skin.

Hah; ...Had her body temperature really adjusted so much, that a little stethoscope felt cold..?

Carlisle lifted the piece of medical technology away from her chest and withdrew the earbuds.

"Your heart has yet to regain sinus rhythm." The blonde doctor looked at Sam.

Leah knew that look. She'd seen it before... Only now it would be Sam hearing the news, having the gavle plunged down instead of her, her mother and her brother.

'I'm sorry. I've done all I can. We've lost your fath-'

... 'I'm sorry. I've done all I can. We're going to lose her.'

Sam bit his lip as Carlisle walked toward the recovery room door, and indicated with his head for Sam to follow. He looked back at her, and with a gentle hand he held her jaw then kissed her tenderly on the forehead.

"..I'll be back..."

Leah felt bad for thinking 'Yeah.. I've heard that before.'

She watched him walk out of the room, and took a deep breath.

She wondered what it would feel like, when it finally happened.

XXXXX

The words tore Sam apart. There was no nearly; it was a knife that was stabbed into his chest, cutting him open and leaving him to bleed.

Sam had stood out in the hallway for awhile, even after Carlisle had departed back downstairs to tell the others the depressing news.

Leah wasn't getting better.
Leah wasn't healing.
Leah's heart wasn't strong enough anymore.
Leah was dying.

Carlisle said that if she fell asleep, she might not wake up again.

The sympathetic doctor gave her tonight; and no more.

Sam was angry. God he was just so fucking angry..! After everything they'd been through, after that pack of blood-thirsty pricks ran for the hills and after days in a desolate hell they'd finally gotten her back home... And now she was dying.

Well, she'd been dying all along, Sam proposed... But she always pulled through. His LeeLee always always pulled through. She carried around some emotional baggage sure but she was never ever actually just finished. And she couldn't be now.

Sam's hands balled into fists, and he walked back into her room.

'Only time will tell', Carlisle had said.

A little time was all Sam needed.

The once-proud Alpha walked silently back into the room and slipped into the bed beside her. He didn't know he was crying until her soft fingertips brushed away a tear on his burning cheek.

The radio was on, like always.

Hush now, don't you cry;
Wipe away, the tear drop from your eye.
You're lying safe in bed..
It was all a bad dream spinning, in your head..

"I guess.. This is it, huh..?" God, her throat burned. Leah looked over at him slowly, her head and neck sore as fuck. Sam was crying. Her gorgeous, strong Sammy was crying. She'd never seen him cry.

Not when he asked her to marry him and she said yes.
Not when he left her.
Not when he scarred up her cousin's face.

Leah might've seen it, once or twice in the cave... But it had never been this vivid. Her Sammy's beautiful dark brown eyes red-rimmed and bloodshot, soaked and miserable as he wrapped his hot arms around her and buried his head into her unruly hair. His weight was a stress on her hurting chest, a press on her agonizing back but at the same time she welcomed it.

(It wasn't like she had a lot of time left to savour his touches.)

His tears hurt her more than she could have ever imagined. Hurt her more than being shot... More than seeing him kiss her own family... It had never been this bad. Using all her strength, the demure amounts of energy she could pull from the depths of her fading form she lifted her right arm just so; layed it on the arm he had wrapped so tightly around her waist and back and forced herself to turn and face him.

Sam winced when he saw the pain cross her beautiful features and his arms tightened around her unknowingly, probably making it worse. Her lovely blue eyes looked at him with nothing but devotion and Sam had never felt like such a failure in all of his life. Such an idiot, such a fucking jerk such a useless waste of space...

Then there was her. So perfect; so beautiful and with all the love in the world. She had saved him. Saved them. Stepped back when they all found their happiness and her's had been ripped away from her. Because she did, step back... Sam saw bad break-ups before; catty girls getting violent with one another and people get hurt but even after Emily's betrayal, Leah had never raised a hand to her; never raised her voice.

(Why hadn't he thought about all of this before?)

He knew it was true.. You never really know what you have until it's gone because if he lost Leah now he would lose everything. Sam guessed, maybe.. Some part of him was always content just having her in his pack; having the graceful light gray creature running beside him during patrol and just knowing she was there; that Leah was there... And he'd always get to enjoy her.

And now he was losing her for good.

He was losing everything.

Sam couldn't find words to answer her... He didn't know if she wanted one because by looking at her she was enjoying the silence, the comfort the low playing of the radio gave her.

He wanted to scream.

Your mind tricked you to feel the pain;
Of someone close to you, leaving the game;
Of life.

So here it is, another chance;
Wide awake, you face the day;
Your dream is over...;

...Or has it just begun?

"Don't cry Sammy.." She murmured. His eyes shot down to her's. "...It's not so bad."

His eyebrow raised slightly, and he nearly choked. "What..?"

Leah wore this small smile... It was full of sadness; full of peace.

"I think it's time."

Sam squeezed his eyes shut and he ground his teeth together. His head began to shake.

"No... It'll never be time. Not yet."

Her hand began to caress his arm slowly, soothingly almost.

There's a place I like to hide;
A doorway that I run through, in the night.

Relax child you were there; but only didn't realize,
And you were scared.

"Sam...I-"

"You've gotta give me once more chance. Give me and the boys just one more chance even though we don't deserve it..!" His voice broke on the words; his voice broke her heart because she had never even imagined Sam, in her wildest dreams sounding this upset; this delirious with misery and violent surrender.

This broken.

Sam saw her open her mouth to answer, but he wasn't finished.

"Please LeeLee just let me talk... I need to lay it out, now; the way it's always been, before and after my friggen mistake and I need you to know that this is not the end.. That this isn't over. I'm not willing to let it be over and I want you- No I need you to stay with me."

He talked so fast, it was like she was dying at that very second. Reminded her of the way the faces and her memories blurred past her when she laid on that muddy bank, facing up into the rain as the bullet found home in her shoulder.

She wasn't sure exactly what to say, so she just gave him that same slow smile. (Smiled more that night then she'd had in the last few years.)

"Sam... Baby... It's okay."

His head was shaking again. The hand on his arm moved to his wet cheek and he stilled.

"..We've got time... Time to say goodbye, and make things right."

It's a place where you will learn,
To face your fears; retrace the years,
And ride the whims of your mind.

Commanding in another world.
Suddenly, you'll hear and see
This magic new dimension..!

"I don't want to say goodbye..!"

Her words cut deep.

"And I didn't want you to leave me for my cousin... But some things are out of our control."

Hell that hurt; but if she'd said it with a bit of bite, like the Leah he'd grown so accustomed to it would've brought him peace of mind intead of the solemn sadness her soft voice, without any hurtful intent brought him now.

Leah could fight this and win. Sam knew she could fight this and win, she was hell-wreaking Leah fucking Clearwater for god's sake..! There was nothing, she couldn't do..

He just had to convince her.. Make her believe.

"Leah why do you want to leave..? I know you can survive this I don't care what the leech says.. I don't care if the odds are a million to one. I just need to know why, baby I need to know how I can fix this..! Fix you..." He voice broke again and he inhaled deeply. "LeeLee, please tell me why."

What did he expect her to say..?

"...I know you don't know what to say." He read her like a book. "Is it because Harry's gone? Because for the last goddamn time LeeLee it wasn't your fault I don't care how you feel otherwise..!" He cringed, sniffed as his tears brought upon his stuffy nose. He was so close he nearly spoke against her lips. "Is it because you can't have children? Because LeeLee you can I know now, we all do, it was in the book... Please baby you can't give up yet."

Leah watched him with her heavy eyes, getting heavier. She was so tired...

I...
Will be watching over you.
I'm gonna help you see it through.
I'll protect you in the night.
I'm smiling next to you...

In silent lucidity.

"Sam... There's nothing you can do."

Her voice never rose. She never cried. She didn't sound angry.

Leah's heartbeat, slow and soft; Sam could feel it against his chest like it was going to stop at any second.

Nothing.

Hell he would do everything.

"LeeLee... I'll do anything. I want you back, I need you. I'll never be able to apologize enough for the pain that I've caused you... For the pain that I've let others cause you and didn't stop." Sam's tear-choked words spoke nothing but the honest truth; Leah could tell.

But what really brought the smile to her lips was that year-old twinkle in her ex-lover's eyes. The little shine that made his dark brown orbs pop.

Sammy was back.

No more imprint, possibly...? Had he stepped out of the alpha role? Leah didn't know for sure. But she liked the change.

Briefly she thought about what he asked of her.

What would life be like, if she survived and went back to Sam now? How would her cousin react? How could she deal with looking men in the face every single day after such a traumatic experience? ...Did he really still love her?

"Please Leah... Please... Tell me what to do."

"...Nothing."

Sam released a sob, hands moving up to hold her cool cheeks.

"I know I fucked up... Baby me and Emily are done. I love you...I Love You and only you. I am so.. So, sorry."

Visualize your dream. (Yes.)
Record it in the present tense. (Don't be scared.)
Put it into a permanent form.
If you persist in your efforts,
You will achieve
A dream come true. (Control.)
(How you doing today? Better?)

How can she say no to Sam...? It was so hard to say no to Sam.

Not the Alpha Sam.. It wasn't hard to say no to the man she'd known for the last 3 years but as she looked up into his eyes again, and saw the man she loved; every instinct said 'takemekissmeholdme'.

But she was not his. He was not her's...

Fate had made that clear.

Dream control;
Dream control;
Dream control.

Help me...

Leah fought back the urge to yawn. She wondered what time it was, where Emily was and how she was doing. If her mom knew she was here; if she'd see her father in heaven. A million random thoughts were flooding her mind; like the jumbled stuff that you can't figure out when you're half-asleep and half-awake. She liked it... It was an escape from the current situation.

Well, she told herself she liked it.

Because she didn't wanna leave Sam's arms. Not really. Yet at the same time.. She knew she should. It was time to let go.. Time to move on and finally leave the pain behind.

Because that's what was in store for her; pain. The pain of recovery... The pain of being an equal individual to her cousin who'd stabbed her in the back; the pain of facing scars from her experience every time she looked in the mirror; and then the pain of looking into Sam's eyes everyday, and remembering what he and the pack had done to her.

"Leah." His voice was still teary; his eyes were still big and beautiful no matter how red.

She was still in pain and growing more and more tired by the second. (Darkness closing in.)

"LeeLee... Don't leave me. Please... I love you so much."

Sam kept talking.

"I'll make everything better... Please I just need the chance." He kept begging.

If you open your mind for me,
You won't rely on open eyes to see.

The walls you built within
Come tumbling down and a new world will begin!

..It was almost funny. Leah smiled because of it, a weak little thing as she looked up at him. How many times had she wished for this...? Imagined this, her own fantasy of her lover returning to her. Promising her paradise for the rest of her life after causing her so much pain.

So why did it feel so wrong now...?

Sam's thumb was rubbing soft circles on her cheek, irritating the scratches, waiting for her to speak. She just wanted the pain to go away.

Living twice at once you learn,
You're safe from pain in the dream domain;
A soul set free to fly!

A round-trip journey in your head.
Master of illusion can you realize?
Your dream's alive, you can be the guide but-

"...I dunno what to do." Leah muttered. Unknowingly leaning into his touch.

"...Stay with us. Your brother and mom... Stay with me."

God, she just wanted to sleep.

I,
Will be watching over you.
I'm gonna help you see it through.
I,
Will protect you in the night..;

Sam was here; arms around her in bed and so close he warmed her paining chest. So near she could inhale the air he breathed out; feel his tears soak her pillow.

It was everything she'd ever wanted.

And having Leah there, was the same for him.

Leah was so tired. Leah was so unsure. But; knew completely, that she could sleep in peace; protected with him there, away from the beating rain she'd grown so accustomed to the last few weeks.

"...Tell you what, S'mmy..", she yawned, "...I'll sleep on it.. Tell you in the morning."

Then she was gone; eyes shut softly, chest still beating up and down and she'd fallen asleep.

Sam's heart stopped. He kissed her forehead, and cried himself to sleep beside her.

The smile never left her lips. Thunder rattled the window.

I'm smilin' next to you...