This chapters kind of like my kid.. translation? I'm pretty damn proud of it! Oh and its a little treat as well, it's a little bit longer. And I do promise, that slowly but surely things will come together and things will begin to make much, much more sense. Song is, Sia "Breathe me". Thank you to my one reviewer, I love you for that by the way. Review guys, come on.

Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
and needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Seven days later:
Brooke:

I was a nervous wreck, not only had I already dropped my keys twice out to the car but I had watched my purse tumble down the stairs too. I was beginning to think that taking Nathan up on his offer to drive was a bright idea. Here I was on my way to pick up, Peyton and I was the nervous one. Everyone had wanted to go along, but I knew that this was something I needed to do alone. I mostly didn't want to admit to anyone that I was scared of what I would find, she'd been forced into staying for two extra days and none of us had seen her. I kept telling myself if they we're releasing her she had to at least be doing okay, but I couldn't get that night out of my mind, sitting in the hospital waiting room, waiting to hear if she was going to even make it through the night? It was all too much, and it almost clouded my excitement to have her back.

I wanted to fast forward a few weeks to a time when things were good again. But really, I'd probably have to fast forward a hell of a lot more than a few weeks for things to ever be okay, let alone good. I pulled into the hospital parking lot and I felt like my heart was sitting on the floor of my car, barely beating. I forced myself to get out and walk up to her floor.

I signed what they put in front of me all in a haze, and there she was. Carrying a little plastic bag at her side. I didn't know what to do, I was scared to death of doing the wrong thing. Saying the wrong thing, but I couldn't hold myself back I walked up to her a tear slipping from my eye and grabbed a hold of her wrapping my arms around her as tightly as I could. "Oh, Peyton, honey." She looked so scared and timid, I wasn't used to seeing her look so fragile. She looked down at the floor and it almost broke my heart to hear her voice, small and defeated, "Can we please get out of here?" I smiled at her and wrapped my arm around her tightly and led her out of there. I was going to do everything possible to make sure she was okay, to make sure she got through this. I had to.

Peyton:

Seeing Brooke almost made everything okay. She looked so freaked out, her face mirroring my thoughts exactly. My stay in that hospital will be something that will always be there in my mind. The fear I felt had nothing to do with where I was but with the thought that I didn't have a choice but to get my life.. going again, and it had been offtrack and wrong for so long I didn't even know if I was capable of that anymore. I wasn't the Peyton Sawyer everyone knew any longer and if I believed my new "therapist" I never would be, but acceptance of that and realization that I could mold myself into the person that I've always been meant to be was all a part of the healing process. I had tried to act as if I knew exactly what she meant by that, but I didn't. I don't have a damn clue how to accept the fact that the person I once was is now gone, and that now I not only have to figure out who I am all over again, but I have to learn to live again. And she wondered why I attempted suicide.

As we got into Brooke's car she looked over at me, "I brought some of your stuff over to the apartment.. I just didn't think you'd want to be alone." I nodded, I knew what that was all about. Obviously my therapist had advised her not to let me stay alone. It's not like I planned on attempting suicide again, you see how well that worked out the first time for me. I wasn't interested in traveling this road again. I took a deep breath, almost wanting to say something to fill the silence of the car but nothing left my lips, and frankly I didn't have the energy to even speak. I felt so drained and exhausted.

"Do you wanna get some food or anything?" Brooke was so nervous that I wanted to grab her and tell her that I was okay, that I was trying, but I couldn't. I couldn't even do that. So instead I shook my head.

Nathan:

I don't know what had woken me up so damn early but I'd spent the past hour trying to fall back to sleep, and there I was, still wide awake. Fuck it. I shoved the covers off of me and got out of bed, the cool air forced me into grabbing a tshirt to throw on. My eyes spotted a white piece of paper on the table beside the bed I grabbed a hold of it and there was Brooke's bubbly handwriting, "I'm off to pick up, Peyton. Be home soon. I love you!" I smiled and crumbled the paper up tossing it in the trash. I slowly headed towards the kitchen, my stomach confirming what I already knew. I needed some breakfast.

I spotted the suitcases and boxes by the front door, the only confirmation that Peyton was gonna be here soon. I couldn't even imagine the mess the girl was gonna be in, thoughts of Peyton brought me to thoughts of Lucas. Brooke had mentioned that he'd fled from the hospital like a bat out of hell, I thought about calling him but glanced at the clock and figured his ass would be passed out somewhere, so there went that thought. I heard Brooke's keys jingling on the outside of the door and I prepared myself for the different lives we we're all about to live.

Haley:

My hands gripped on the steering wheel as I made my usual trip to Lucas'. I'd begun to think that maybe he was becoming too dependent on these visits, but if I didn't go half the time the boy didn't eat or even leave the safety of his bed more than once or twice a day. I couldn't stand by and watch that. I pulled up to his house and got out of my car, I shoved the door open, knowing before I even tried that it would be unlocked. Another one of his brilliant habits, never locking the door. I walked in and fount the usual, his room was covered in clothes that had been there since the last time I cleaned everything up for him. It didn't piss me off, however, like it had in the past. It kind of made me sad. I was still not used to seeing this Lucas, even if I'd been dealing with him for close to a year now. It never got familiar.

I walked towards his bed and shoved him a couple times, "Lucas. LUCAS!" He opened his eyes blinking furiously up at me, "Haley, what the hell?" I pulled the covers back, "Come on, your getting up." I heard the cuss words flying out of his mouth, but I knew he'd get up. He knew the routine, he could argue with me all morning I wouldn't leave until his ass was out of bed. "I brought you some food." I picked up the paper bag and headed towards the kitchen. I knew he'd follow.

Brooke:

"I didn't even know what to do with myself, Nathan." I almost started to cry, tears were becoming a part of my routine lately, "She's my best friend and I didn't have a clue how to act around her. How sad is that?" He grabbed a hold of me and wrapped his arms around my waist, sometimes it still surprised me how he knew just what I needed, "Stop it. Your best friend just attempted suicide, how could you know how to act?" I was tired of talking, my head ached with all the effort and strain of the past week. I needed it all to go away so I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his lips toward mine and we collided. He responded quickly pulling me closer and pushing his lips against mine forcefully. God I loved him.

Haley:

Visiting Lucas was a routine, I got him out of bed, he would come into the kitchen and scarf down the food I brought him, we would sit in silence for awhile then he would get up and shower, and he'd come back with his usual, "Thanks for everything, Hales. But I've gotta go." I'd tried everything in the past, so instead of yelling or getting upset I would grab my purse and leave. He wouldn't listen to me no matter what I said, but I promised myself that no matter how heartbreaking the visits were I would continue. Nothing was different today, we both sat in silence. It was a little harder to stand today, all the silence was letting my mind wander to the past week so when he spoke I came close to jumping out of my chair.

"I've messed up, you know." I removed my gaze from the window and turned to him, my face obviously revealing what I was feeling, confusion. "When did it all get like this, Haley?" Lucas and I hadn't come this close to a conversation that was more than filler in months, I wasn't sure how to respond at first. "I don't know, Luke. I think we ignored it for awhile." He raked his hands through his hair and it all startled me, it was so real. Lucas was there in front of me, admitting what we've all known and been trying to explain for so long. "I'm gonna go take a shower." And then it was gone.

Nathan:

Brooke's arms were wrapped around me in an urgent grip, so I brought her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her waist and pushing my lips against hers forcefully meeting her motions. I needed her just as much as she needed me in that moment. God we we're good together.

Nathan, eight months ago:

"I'm not good at any of this, Brooke, I know I probably move too fast and I know I get everything wrong all the time, and I'll probably [Censored] it all up, but when I'm with you I can see myself becoming a better guy just by standing in the same room with you, you make me want to try, Brooke." Little tears slipped out of her eyes, and I wanted to wipe them away but I didn't know how she'd react so I kept my hands at my sides. I made myself stop talking, stop moving, and I waited, she didn't say anything for the longest time and then she brushed the tears away and finally spoke "It's kind of funny, because sometimes I feel like I'm the one who's making all the mistakes."

I didn't waste any time, my lips we're crashing into hers before she had a chance to even think another thought. I've been guilty before of kissing girls to shut them up, I've kissed girls out of pity or for control, but when I kissed Brooke in that moment, the way we held each other, and tried so hard to feel every ounce of it, I wasn't trying to control anything or avoid anything or tease anything, It was love that kissed her.

I knew right then that I would never need anything else in my life, she had filled the void I didn't even realize was there. She completed me in a way I didn't think I'd ever needed in the first place, but here she was, making me feel things I never thought I could.

Brooke, eight months ago:

"It's kind of funny, because sometimes I feel like I'm the one who's making all the mistakes." I meant it, how could I not feel that way sometimes? I didn't have the best track record behind me. But in that moment none of that really mattered, because I'd never needed someone in my life as much as I needed him. Sometimes we see the worst in ourselves, the most vulnerable versions of ourselves, but all we really need is someone else to get close enough to tell us we're wrong. Someone we trust. Everything I was feeling in that moment scared me in way's I would never began to be able to explain to anyone, including myself. I'd thought what I had with Lucas had been intense, but this? It was so much more than Lucas and I ever could of had. Nathan brought a whole different meaning to taking my breath away.

He was all I would ever need in life. I felt like I could take on anything with his hand in mine. It was undeniable, I was in love with this boy. Completely. I pulled my lips away from his and whispered, "You know I love you, right?" I felt him smiling and it brought a smile to my lips, "Of course I do, but I think it's safe to say I love you a little more." That was more than enough.

Lucas, one year ago:

That horrible thing the world calls the phone started ringing at 12:01 am, I almost didn't grab it, assuming my mom would take the job upon herself, besides I was still too half asleep to even really care. It was the damn phone after all. I figured out that she wasn't picking it up after several rings, I picked it up my voice still heavy with sleep, "Hello?" I heard a deep voice on the other end began talking loudly, making my head start into a headache already, "Lucas Scott?" I cleared my voice a little, "Yeah, this is him." The other end was silent for a couple of seconds, "Mr. Scott, I'm calling about Karen Roe and Keith Scott. There's been an accident. Karen Roe was transported to the hospital about twenty minutes ago, Keith Scott however died at the scene." I think I might have gotten out a simple, "Okay." But no more than that before the phone was hung up and I was in the car driving to the hospital.

It didn't matter, I got there and the nightmare I would soon be forced into calling my life began, the day my world became nothing. It took seven words to end it all. "I'm sorry, we did everything we could." We all know what it means, universal for, sorry son but your mom's dead and your world's over. But look, I promise we did what we could to stop your world from ending, but it wasn't enough.