Chapter 42
Prom?

I went out into the living room to find out who had stopped by.
I was both happy and disappointed to see him. Disappointed because I would have loved to see the other one as well, but happy because I am happy to see him.

Antoine stood in the doorway of my house, holding a dozen roses and wearing a Tux. I looked down and smiled at him as I went over to take the roses.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"I'm going to snatch some alone time with you. I know I'm on your bad side now. I'm just praying I can fix that." He answered kindly.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"We are going somewhere special, absolutely special."

"Can you tell me what it is then?"

"No, it's a surprise. We won't be entirely alone though, since it is a distance away, your father will be coming with, along with your mother."

I looked over at my parents, pleading them with my eyes not to go. They just shook their heads.

"Okay," I sighed. "How do I need to dress?"

"It's a pretty formal restaurant. I'd say...dressy. Only if you are comfortable though."

I nodded and walked back into my room. I felt fortunate that Alice has always taken me on shopping trips to stores other than the ones in Port Angeles.

I roamed through my closet, searching for a romantic dress. I found one, but I wasn't quite sure if it was too formal. I put it on anyway.
It was a sliver dress that was floor length. It hugged my torso and had ruffles at the bottom. It was also a strapless dress, it made me feel beautiful.

Now to do my hair. I brushed out my curls, deciding that if this was a formal restaurant, I should probably have an up do. I pulled it back into a tight pony tail. Then I took a bottom layer and wrapped around the hair tie, giving the illusion that I didn't have a hair tie in. I pined that to the underside where no one would notice.

My curls flowed down my back. My shoulders were bare because it was up in a pony tail. I went over to my jewelry box and picked out a diamond necklace that my parents had given me for my fifteenth birthday. It looked perfect around my neck with no hair bothering it.

I looked in the mirror now; I decided that I wasn't going to use makeup tonight. If Antoine was the one, he'd love me for my face without make up. I let out a sigh and left my room to go out into the living room.

I opened my door slowly, expecting to see everyone standing there, luckily, no one was there. I made my way down the hall way, my heals clacking on the hardwood floor. I stopped at the living room and stood there. Everyone stared at me in disbelief.

Antoine walked over to me and took my hand. He gently kissed it and then looked into my eyes.

"You're so beautiful." He whispered.

I could feel myself blushing, so I turned my head away. He held out a corsage. He opened the little box and lifted my wrist and gently slid it on.

"Are we going to a prom or something?" I asked with a smile.

"Sort of. We're going to Seattle."

"What? Where in Seattle are we going?"

"We'll be going to the Georgetown Ballroom. They have this thing going on; it's basically throwing a prom for homeschooled teenagers."

I smiled at him.

"Really!"

"Yes really, now let me get your coat, it is a bit chilly outside tonight." He walked over to the coat hanger and picked out a white shall and placed it around my shoulders.

"Shall we?" he asked, holding his arm out.

I giggled and linked my arm with him. I hadn't even noticed my parents. My mother was dressed in a black gown with ruffles at the bottom; my father was in a tux.
Antoine escorted me out of the house, my parents followed close behind. We got outside and we all ran gracefully to the Cullens' house.
There, to my surprise, was the car we were going to ride in.

It was a limo.

"Is…is that?" I stuttered, too shocked to complete a sentence.

"Yes, that's the car we will ride in." he smiled.

My parents took the front seat; my father was going to drive. Antoine took the back seat, he opened the door for me and I slid in.

The inside was absolutely amazing; it had a TV and everything. Then, I noticed a mini fridge. I looked at him with a puzzled expression. He just smiled.

"It's not filled, I know we don't drink or eat, but I couldn't get one without it."

My father's eyes were locked on the rear view mirror. I could hear him muttering to my mother about the fact that we weren't properly supervised back there. She argued back, telling him that we needed time to ourselves.

I pressed the button that would put a divider up between us. It automatically went down.

"No," my father instructed.

I pressed the button again.

"Yes," I argued.

He went to push the other button again, but my mother slapped his hand away. The divider went up. I looked over at Antoine. He looked so beautiful, like a supermodel. I felt butterflies in my stomach when I looked at him.

"So I'm a little confused…" I said aloud.

"About what, my dear?"

"Well…first, you tell me that you are madly in love with me, spend every night you can with me, and then all of the sudden…you tell me that I need to spend more time with Jacob because you know he loves me too. Then you just disappear. Then you show up and when I say anything you get mad at me to the point where Jacob had to come and save me. Then you disappear again and I find out that you were working with the Volturi and I just don't know what to believe anymore—"

"Please, allow me to explain everything, it's the least I can do for you. I know I have hurt you, and believe me, knowing the pain I've put you through…it kills me. I feel like I've let you down, and I know I don't deserve a second chance, but love, I'm asking for it. So please, please let me explain everything to you…after tonight. I want you to have a good time."

I nodded and kissed him lightly on the cheek. There was long awkward silence from then on. I'd look at him, he'd look at me and then we'd both look away.
I tried to gather my thoughts, trying to figure out what I was to do.

How could he do this to me? How could he work with the Volturi, telling them that I have changed Rosaline? I don't know if I should believe him or not.
On one hand, he was always so kind to me, he always told me he loved me and made sure we never went to fast. He spent all the time he could with me and was kind to my family.
On the other hand, I have fallen totally in love with Jacob and in a way…it's fate. He's imprinted on me…what can I do about that?

Thoughts of Jacob and I were swirling my head. Before I knew it I was daydreaming about the night Jacob and I went to the beach. The way he looked at me made my stomach do summersaults, in a good way though.
I let out a heavy sigh.

I'd been lost in my own thoughts for such a long time that I didn't even realize that we were pulling up the Georgetown Ballroom in Seattle.
Antoine put an arm on my shoulder and whispered in my ear.

"We're here, love."

I looked up at him and then out the window. He was right, we were here.
He got out of the car and ran over to my side. He opened the door and held out his hand for me to take. I took it.

He escorted me into the ballroom.
The room was absolutely beautiful. Twinkling lights were everywhere. It was romantic, couples swayed on the dance floor together. There was a light on the ceiling that was spinning around, sending little spots of light on the floor.

I looked at Antoine; he smiled at me and then stepped away. He bowed and held out his hand.

"May I have this dance mademoiselle?"

I giggled and blushed, but took his hand. He led me to the dance floor.
When we reached it he spun me around and placed his hand on my waist and kept the other hand holding mine.
We swayed and twirled in circles. He was looking deep into my eyes, searching for an answer to his question.

"What do you think?" he asked.

"I…I don't know what to say, it's beautiful."

"Not nearly as beautiful as the girl I'm holding."

I knew how badly I wanted to kiss him, but something didn't feel right. I decided to give into it though and see what would happen.
I leaned up slowly, remaining eye contact. Our lips met in a slow, light, peck.
Suddenly I felt like I was cheating on Jacob, even if we weren't officially together. I pulled away, only to see a shocked expression on his face.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked.

"No, it's not you…it's me." I answered quickly. He looked at me, not wanting to believe that I didn't want to kiss him.

"What's wrong then?" he still sounded like he was sure it was him.

"It's…it's just that…I don't know."

I put my head down in shame.

"You're in love with him. Aren't you?"

I slowly nodded and then looked back up at him.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"No, don't be. I told you that you needed to spend more time with Jacob, I meant that. I want you to be one hundred percent sure who you love and who you will choose."

"No, I know that. IT's just that I feel like I've let you down. Like, I've given you something and now I'm taking it back."

"Don't feel like that, I love you, but just because I love you, doesn't mean you should choose me. Jacob loves you too, you're his imprintee."

I nodded and rested my head on his shoulder. He pulled me closer and we swayed together.

There was some part of me that was wishing that it was Jacob who was holding me, swaying with me.
I shook the thought from my head. If I was going to give Antoine a fair shot, I needed to be thinking about him and only him. These were my feelings and I needed to be absolutely sure. I couldn't if I only thought of Jacob.

I closed my eyes, and imagined my life with Antoine. It was a happy life. I saw him and I, sitting on a porch together, I saw us putting babies to sleep. But that was it. There was no romance, no love, and no passion.

The music suddenly stopped and everyone was leaving. I looked up at Antoine.

"Is it time to go already?" I asked.

"Yes, love, it is." He said smiling. He took my arm and we left the building. My parents were already waiting at the car for us.

They got in and Antoine opened my door and helped me in. He slipped in next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder again. I sat up again and looked him.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I need you to explain now."

He sighed and sat up completely now.

"You can ask me anything now." He said, moving a strand of hair from my face.

I took a deep breath.

"Why did you tell me you wanted me to spend less time with you and more time with Jacob?" I asked.

"Because, I needed you to be absolutely positive about whom you love."

"But I loved you."

"I know that, and I loved you so much, but I knew it would be selfish of me if I took you without you exploring all of your options."

"Okay…well you disappeared…for…days. What happened to you?"

"I had to go back home."

"To Italy?"

"Yes."

"Okay, but Jake came to my room one night and he could smell you."

"I'd been in your room plenty of times before that, Renesmee."

"No, he didn't smell your scent from the times before…"

"What did he smell then?"

"He said it smelled like you had just been there."

He had a sudden intake of breath.

"I had…I had been in your room." He whispered.

"What? You had? Why didn't you tell me? Why did you stay away from me?"

"Because, I couldn't be in contact with you."

"Why?"

He took a deep breath.

"Renesmee, my father is part of the Volturi. That is not something you or I can take lightly. Let's face it; your family has had a lot of run-ins with the Volturi."

"You didn't answer my question."

"I left because my father, somehow, found out that I was seeing you, falling in love with you. He gave me two choices."

"What were the choices?"

"I either had to kill you myself, or he would kill you. I knew that if he was the one to do it, then it would be slow and painful. I couldn't bare that; I couldn't stand to see you die like that."

I sat away from him.

"You were going to kill me?" I whispered.

"I told him I would, but I was going to figure out a way to save you. I stayed away from you because it was hiding my true plans from my father. He thought I was staying away to make it easier for me to kill you. I was really coming up with a plan to save your life."

"Why were you in my room though?"

"I had to make sure that you were safe, I…I couldn't stand not seeing you for that length of time. I love you too much, when you're not with me…there's this whole that starts forming in my heart. It only begins to heal when you are with me, but it seems as like that time goes by so fast that the whole never fully heals."

"That day in the forest, when…when we were talking. You got really angry with me when I asked you why you signed off every time I signed in. Why did you do that?"

"What? Sign off when you signed in or got mad?"

"Sign off."

"I did that because I knew you would talk to me, and that would only make my plan harder."

"Why did you yell at me after when I started to leave the forest?"

"That was so you would be angry with me, you wouldn't want to talk to me…it'd make the plan easier."

I nodded and looked down at my fingers. I was fidgeting compulsively.

"Why did you lie in the note?"

"What note?" he asked, his face was genuinely puzzled.

"The note I found in your house. You said in it that Jacob had attacked you."

"Oh…That."

"Yeah, what was that?"

"That was a lie." He whispered.

"Why'd you lie?"

"When I would spend nights with you, I would leave when you'd go to sleep, but come back to watch you sleep. You always muttered my name, saying that you loved me. It made me feel…it made me feel wanted. When you started spending time with Jacob…" he trailed of and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"What happened when I started spending time with Jacob?"

He looked at me; there was sadness in his eyes.

"You stopped saying you loved me." He whispered.