Hey everyone!! I come bringing a new chapter and asking a favor. If you haven't voted for this story in the 2009 Twilight Awards, you only have until March 15th to get your vote in. It has been nominated in the Best Jacob category (go here to vote - hxxp://forum (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/forum/CuriosityKilled_The_Cat/69076/ just take out the xx and put in a tt and change (dot) to a period) Please show the love and vote for Jake. Thanks so much for reading and supporting my stories. You don't know how much it means to me.

Chapter Seventeen

The Last Secret

As Jake thumbed through my book, I watched his facial expression change from curiosity to frustration. He seemed very intent on finding something, like he was doing research and all I could think about was how much I had craved his company and those quiet times we had shared together.

Here he was, alone with me in my room, but there was a distance between us. He still wasn't completely back to his old self, but I guess with the changes he had undergone that was understandable.

"You know, I was praying my truck would keep messing up that day I came to see you. I wanted a reason to show up at your doorstep and I was so lucky that it all happened the way it did," I whispered, drawing nervous circles on my comforter.

Jake stopped looking through the book and brought his head up to meet my reluctant eyes. I hadn't wanted to share all of my secrets with him, but right then I felt like I needed to let him know how much I wanted to just be the way we used to be.

But instead of him looking surprised, he almost had a look of uncertainty in his eyes which made me regret telling him. I'm sure my face was pale and I almost felt faint. Why had I opened my big mouth? Why hadn't I just let well enough alone and been happy that he was here, even though he wasn't paying any attention to me?

"I don't mind that you used your truck to get to me. As a matter of fact, I find it flattering," he said, giving me a cocky little smile.

"I didn't use my truck. I just wanted to see you again and....."

"Bella," he said, placing his finger to my lips, "I wouldn't trade a single moment that we've spent together in my garage over the truck. My baby is the most important thing in the world," he concluded and let his finger trail over to my cheek where he cupped my face in his hand.

We were quiet then for a few minutes before that same look came back into his eyes and he looked back down at the book. I lay across my bed and watched him for a long time.

"You know. I've read almost everything in that book. If you want to know something in particular, I'd be glad to help find it."

"Do you mind if I take it home with me? That way I know you'll come La Push tomorrow to get it back," he said smiling.

"You know I wouldn't miss coming over tomorrow for anything, book or no book. I'll be coming to see you," I replied, sitting back up on the bed beside him, "But, I'll just keep my book here tonight and I'll bring it with me when I come. Maybe that would insure that you'll be there when I come to see you."

"Okay, okay. I give. I'd hate to think of holding your book ransom for a visit," he said laughing.

"Yeah and now I better go get something started for dinner. Charlie will be hungry when he gets home. Will you come talk to me in the kitchen?" I said, pulling him with me as I made my way toward the door.

"Okay. I guess if you spent all that time with me in the garage, I can spend time with you in the kitchen," he said.

Jake and I went to the kitchen and he leaned against the counter while I put some eggs on to boil and opened a few cans of tuna. I put the tuna into a bowl and got out the mayonnaise, pickles, and an onion.

While I was chopping the onion and pickles, Jake, leaned down onto the counter beside me on his elbow.

"I told the man at the auto part's store that someday I'd make you mine. I just thought I'd throw that out there because you were coming clean about the truck," he said smiling at me.

"So that's what all those notes and glances were about. I guess I should feel flattered too?"

"I hope so, but I'm just being honest."

We talked for a while as I got things finished for dinner and Jake stayed and ate with us. When it was time for him to leave, he made me promise again that we would come to dinner tomorrow, then he drove away and I went back inside to get ready for bed.

The next day went by quickly. I had to clean the house, do laundry, and other chores. I also wanted to make a dessert to take to Jake's that night.

When I finished the housework, I pulled out a cookbook and thumbed through it looking for something Jake would like. I settled on a double chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and a recommendation to garnish with chocolate shavings. I gathered everything I would need and began working on the sinful creation.

After putting the cake in to bake, I went upstairs to get ready for tonight. This was the first time Jake and Billy had asked us over since Jake's transformation. I was excited about going, hoping Jake and I would be able to spend some time together.

By the time Charlie got home, I had the cake finished and was ready to go. He had to work today, saying something about more strange events going on in the nearby counties. So, while we drove to La Push, I tried to get him to tell me what was going on.

"So, what did you find out today with your investigation?"

"Oh, not much. We don't have any leads yet and it's really frustrating because we had another hiker who's gone missing. I'm afraid it may not be good," he replied, without looking at me.

I could tell he was worried and I was starting to worry too. The first thing that came to my mind was that it might be....no I couldn't even think it. I didn't want to think about it, but the fact remained that it might be a vampire that was plaguing the area.

The possibilities played out in my mind the rest of the way to La Push. I knew if it was a vampire it wouldn't be the Cullens, but that made me even more frightened. That meant that what might be lurking around out there could very well be a creature that had no regard for human life, not mine, my dad's, not Billy's, not Jake's, or anyone's on the reservation. I shuddered at the thought of anyone I knew getting hurt or even worse, being killed.

Charlie hadn't even turned off the ignition to his cruiser yet when Jake appeared at my window. He smiled at me and looked so happy that we were there, yet I could see a hint of something....something I couldn't quite put my finger on and it worried me.

He opened the door and was reaching for me when I had to stop him. I had the chocolate cake that I had slaved over sitting in my lap and needed to hand it to him, before I could get out. But I had no idea he was going to be a wise guy.

"Hey, Bella. Hey, Charlie," Jake said as he ducked his head into the car, eying what I was holding.

"I made something for us to have for dessert," I said, offering the sinful chocolate cake to Jake through the open door of the car.

"This looks so good that I can see myself licking the plate. Thanks Bells," he said, as he took the cake, closed the door, and started walking off leaving me sitting in the car with my mouth hanging open.

Jake looked like he was drooling over the cake as he and Charlie walked into the house and my dad tossed a glance back over his shoulder at the car just before they both disappeared inside. I crossed my arms over my chest and debated on getting out or staying where I was until someone noticed that I wasn't present at the dinner table. I knew the way to a man's heart was through his stomach, but this was ridiculous.

I was just closing the door of the car when I felt the heat of a thousand candles engulf me from behind as I was being swept off my feet. I tried to struggle and get free, but Jake was having nothing of the sort as he wrapped me completely in his arms and turned me around to face him.

"You didn't think I'd take the cake and not take you? Did you?" he asked, as he gave me the biggest grin ever.

"I was beginning to think that I wasn't even going to be missed. I mean, after all, you had the cake, the food, and the company, so what would you need me for?" I said, trying to decide if I was pouting or actually mad.

"I need you for lots of reasons. The first one being....." he said, as he tilted his head and bent down to give me a kiss and of course I let him.

And that was all it took for me, as he melted my worries away and made me feel wanted again. I smiled up at him when he pulled away.

"I've missed being here and I've missed you," I whispered.

"I know. But you're here now and I am starving so, let's go eat," he said, laughing as he grabbed my hand and pulled me along with him. "My dad and I made baked chicken, rice, salad, and baked potatoes with my dad's special seasoning on them."

"I didn't realize I was hungry to until you started talking about food," I said laughing too.

We went inside and Jake snuck one more kiss before we went into the kitchen where Billy and Charlie were putting things on the table and talking. I heard my dad telling Billy about his investigation and the look on Billy's face told me he too had his suspicions.

Jake and I sat down, and Billy and Charlie got situated at the table too. They passed the food around and before long we were all eating. The occasional joke was told, or a word said here and there, until we had finally finished eating.

"Okay. Who's ready for this cake that Bella brought? I almost thought about bypassing dinner and diving into it," Jake said, as he got up and started getting dessert plates.

Our dad's just laughed as they watched Jake slicing the cake and I got up to help him with passing out the pieces. When everyone was sufficiently stuffed, Jake and I started clearing the dishes away, while Billy and Charlie went to the small living room to catch up and watch the news together.

I had just started drawing the dish water, when Jake leaned over and asked me, "Did you bring the book?"

"Yes. I left it in the car. Jake, what's so important in the book? We've talked about everything. Don't I know all there is to know about the wolves now?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Come on. Let's leave these and I'll finish them later. I'll go get the book and you go to my room. I want to talk with you about something," Jake said, quietly and I could tell by the expression on his face that he was troubled by whatever he needed to share with me.

I walked slowly back to Jake's room and sat down on his bed. I felt a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was almost afraid to hear what he had to say.

When he finally came into the bedroom, he looked at me with a troubled expression as he sat down on the bed beside me.

"So, what else haven't you told me? I thought that there were no more secrets between us?" I said, running a trembling hand over my face then laying it in my lap where I rubbed my hands together as I waited for him to begin.

He reached over and took my hands in his and held them as he slowly met my gaze.

"Bella. I have never felt the way I feel about you for anyone else. These past few weeks have been so hard and I've wanted to be with you. You were always on my mind and not a day went by that I wished I could roll back the hands of time. I love you, Bella. Please believe me."

"Jake, I want to believe you but you're scaring me. I mean, how much more can there be? You and all of your friends turn into giant wolves and were created to kill vampires, of all things. It can't get anymore, out there than that. Can it?"

Jake's eyes dropped uncomfortably to our clasped hands, then he slowly forced himself to look back at me.

"There is a genetic trait amongst most of the wolves. A way for nature to preserve the wolf gene and insure that it is passed on from generation to generation. It's nature among us, among our kind, and it happens whether we want it to or not. It's called imprinting. It's natures way of bringing us to our perfect mate—our soul mate supposedly."

"I don't understand, Jake. You mean that your wife, or mate, or lover or whatever she's called is already.....already chosen for you?" I asked as my voice began to rise and my hands began to tremble.

What was he telling me? That he liked me and all but that I had to get over it because there was something better waiting on him out there?

"Bella, I have no control over this thing. If I had my choice, it would be you, it would always be you. And I'm not saying it's going to happen, but it might. And if it does....."

I started pulling my hands away from him, but he clung to me. When I stood up though, he let me go and looked at me with such a pained look in his eyes, but I had to think. I had to try and process what he was telling me.

After all that he and I had been through was he telling me that it was over? Was he telling me that what we had didn't mean anything? I didn't know what he meant and I was too upset to talk, so I just stared at him as the hot tears began to slip down my cheeks.

"Jake...I....." was all I could say.

"Bella. We can fight this. That's why I wanted to look at the book. I know there has to be something in here about it. There just has to be. Bella, let's look together. We can find the answer together," he pleaded.

But I couldn't stand the thought of losing him too. I had already lost him once and had just gotten him back. Why did he even bother working on things between us when he knew this all along?

I couldn't just stand there and listen. I had to get out of the room for a few minutes, so I bolted and ran down the hall and out the back door. I stumbled off the back porch and toward the privacy of the nearby trees still in the glow of the night light. I heard a twig snap, and felt warmth surrounding me.

"Hey. Come here. It's going to be okay. I'm here, Bella. I'm here," I heard a familiar voice say as I found myself in Quil's arms.

I fell apart there in his arms, just like I had before he became a wolf too. He was even bigger than the last time I saw him and his body heat was radiating all around me. I felt safe there, so he held me and ran his hand over my hair until I could get my breath and stop crying some.

"How.....did you....know I'd .... be here? So....you....knew too?" I managed to get out in between breaths and sobs.

"I told Jake he had to tell you or I would. He thought he was protecting you by keeping it from you, Bella. He told me he was going to tell you tonight and I wanted to be here for you. I didn't know until I phased and was able to connect with the others and I saw it in their thoughts. Sam is the only one so far that has imprinted."

"Why does being involved with you guys have to hurt so much?" I said, trying to wipe my eyes.

"I don't know, Bella. Who knew that this sort of thing happened or that werewolves and vampires even existed?" he said, trying to make me feel better.

"So what he basically told me is that he loves someone out there more than he could ever love me and that if he meets her he can't control himself?" I said, falling apart again.

"No, that's not what I said, Bella," Jake said, as he walked up behind me and I heard him growl at Quil, but I didn't raise up, I just buried myself deeper in Quil's arms where he held me even closer and turned me slightly away from Jake like he was protecting me.

"Back off Jake. This is hard enough for her," he warned, then his voice became softer, "Bella, there has to be a way around this for both of you," Quil said, still stroking my hair.

"For both of us? What......do.....you mean. I'm....I'm the one standing here waiting around for him to meet his soul mate and never look back at me?" I said, pulling back to look up at Quil who was looking at Jake.

"I didn't get to finish...." Jake said, and I looked over at him to see him rubbing the back of his neck and looking down at the ground.

"Would someone please tell me what's going on?" I said, wiping my face on my sleeve as I looked from Quil over to Jake.

Jake walked closer and reached over to take my hand, but he didn't pull me away from Quil. I could tell that he didn't like me being this close to Quil because he was clenching his jaws, but I needed someone to hold me that was telling me the truth and not trying to keep things from me.

"It's a two-way street Bella. You're a female and there are male werewolves popping up everywhere. The same thing could happen to you. One of the wolves could look into your eyes and the two of you would be instantly joined by a bond that is hard to break," Jake said sadly.

"But, Bella would have a choice," Quil said, "she could reject the imprint and she'd be free."

"I'm so confused. And I don't want anyone, anyone but you Jake," I said, sobbing again.

"Bells, let me hold you, baby. Please?" Jake pleaded, as he gently tugged on my arm.

Quil loosened his grip and gave me the choice to go to Jake, but I didn't. I stayed where I was and Quil continued to hold me and try to console me. Jake let go of my hand and I heard him let out a long sigh, but it was several minutes before I could pull myself together.

When I finally stopped crying, I pulled away from Quil and went over the steps on the back porch. Quil joined me sitting on one side and Jake sat down on the other. I was trying to organize my thoughts and wrap my head around all of this mystical natural force crap.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes fighting with all my might to keep the tears held back, and said in a whisper, "I guess there's only one thing left for me to do then. I would never stand in the way of you being happy. I hope you find.....I hope you find her."

Then I jumped up and started running toward the front of the house. I heard what sounded like Jake hitting the porch and I heard what sounded like an animal growling and snarling behind me, then heavy footsteps followed, and before I could make it to the front yard, he grabbed me from behind and held me to his chest, his arms locked in front of me, as I tried to fight my way free, but when he buried his face in the curve of my neck and I felt him trembling, I stopped struggling and let him just hold me.

This was so unlike the Jake I knew and I could feel his inner turmoil and struggle. I understood and felt his pain, it was my pain too. But I saw no way around this mandate of nature. I had fought for him for so long, but now I felt like I couldn't win, even if I tried.

"I won't let you go. I can't let you go, Bell.....Bella. I want you and I always have. You are what matters to me most in this world. You and me is what matters. Please don't turn your back on me, on us. At least give me a chance to find a way around this," he whispered against my neck and I felt myself sinking deeper into his tight embrace. I didn't want to leave his arms but it hurt so much to think there was another girl or woman out there just waiting to take him away from me.

He loosed his grip some, but still wouldn't let go of me, so I turned around in his arms I saw him in the dim light. His eyes were closed, his brows furrowed, and the look of a broken man displayed upon his face. I sucked in a gulp of air and felt that lump rising again in my throat, as he bent down, and pressed his lips to mine.

It was soft and when his lips touched mine, I felt something new, that I'd never felt before. I felt the truth. I felt how much he loved me and how much he was willing to fight for us to be together.

My head swam as our kiss continued and became filled with necessity. It was like we were both fighting for air and the only way to get it was to deepen and lengthen our kiss. He made my skin burn with his touch and my stomach tingled with the waves of excitement as I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me even closer to him, forming my body to his.

He slowly pulled away and it hurt to not be kissing him, but when my lips were free, I whispered, "I can't walk away from you. I'll fight this with you Jake. I promise. But you have to promise me one thing. If you find her and everything changes between us that you will tell me before you go to her."

"I can't promise that Bella. If I were to run into her some day, I would fight it with all my strength, my heart, my soul, and I would come to you because I won't go to her. Never."

"I don't think you can say that. If what you and Quil tell me is true, you won't be able to resist her. She will call to you in a way, a way that will make you not want to live without her."

"No, no, no, no.....I'll never...."

"Shh, don't say never because that word might haunt you some day. Let's just try to figure this out. You say there may be something in the book. So, that's where we start," I said, as I took his hand in mine and kissed it gently.

We started walking back to the house and went inside. I asked if I could wash my face, but Jake wouldn't even let me into the bathroom alone. He rubbed my back and held my hair while I washed my face, then handed me a towel when I was finished.

Then he took me to his room and closed the door, as he climbed up onto the bed and leaned against the headboard, pulling me down to sit between his legs and leaned me against him while we opened the book together.

As we read and scoured through the book it seemed like every reference to love would always point to imprinting, or as the old book called it, the choice of nature. But then we came to one story, toward the end of the book and I sat up as I began to read it aloud.

"There was a young warrior named Nashoba who had fallen in love before he had begun to change. It is said that he loved the young maiden, Amitola, with all his heart and that he had vowed he could not live without her, so he asked the Great Spirit to set his choice free and let it pass on to someone else because he did not need the help of nature, he had already found the woman to whom he was bound forever, body, mind, heart, and soul. The Great Spirit listened to his plea and told him that if he could prove himself worthy of such love, he would grant the request."

"And? What happened next?" Jake asked, scooting closer to me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"It says that he was given a task by the Great Spirit, to offer himself to the maiden in a blood pledge, a mingling of their blood together, but if she refused, because it was painful, then he would have to go forth and accept his choice of nature. But if she agreed and their love was strong, then they would be bound together, never to be parted by the choice of nature."

"But what is this blood pledge? How does it work?" Jake asked eagerly.

"It doesn't say Jake. That appears to be the end of the story and the book."

I could feel Jake's hopes fading again, as were mine. The only clue as to what we could do to keep us together seemed to be at a dead end. Frustrated and confused, I tried to get up off the bed, but Jake still had his arms around me and seemed to be in deep thought, so as I struggled to get up, the book fell to the floor, breaking its spine.

When I finally got up and knelt down to pick up the book, I noticed that where the spine had cracked, there was a hairline opening between the hard cover of the book and the inner page that covered it and an old yellowed piece of paper was peeking out.

I started pulling the paper out, but just as I did my dad called for me to go home. I didn't tell Jake that there was something hidden in the book, so I closed it up and decided I would wait until I got home to pry it out. Maybe this was what we needed to break the choice of nature—to break imprinting for ever.

I kissed Jake goodnight and he walked to the front of the house. I thanked Billy on my way through the living room, and Jake held the door as we went outside.

"I'm sorry I hurt you tonight. I just wish this thing didn't exist. We should be able to choose who we love in this life and not have some force choosing it for us. And I do love you Bella. I hope you believe that," Jake said, stroking the side of my head with his hand.

"I do believe you Jake. And I love you too. Will I see you tomorrow?"

"I'd like to come spend the day with you, if that's okay? I'd probably be safer in Forks than around here," he said, looking down at the ground.

"I'll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight," I whispered as my dad walked out.

Charlie thanked Jake and told him goodbye and we left to go back home. Neither Charlie nor I spoke on the way back, and I was glad that I didn't have to talk about anything. I had too much on my mind.