A/N: Hey y'all! Sorry it's been so long; it was not intentional, but you know how RL gets (plus other fics, etc.). We hope it's worth the wait! Thanks to Lulubelle for dottin' the i's and crossin' the t's...without further ado, chap 6...

Shalu and Carminmoon said sumthin' 'bout some button er other, that might be needed, so I'm supposed to warn y'all. They also said sumthin' like laundry day, or fresh undies...I don't know, them two they's got some crazy stuff floatin' in them heads, so just go with it. I try not to rock the boat.

The last we saw our crazy youngun's they was standin' in front of a one room cabin…one coverin' her mouth in horror, anuther squinchin' his nose at the mess on his shirt, and two guffawin' buffoons tryin' not to pee their britches at the hilarious sight in front o'their eyes.

Boy am I glad I don't have to clean that mess up.

Alice could barely look elsewhere as she dropped her hand and stepped forward, not knowing what to do. Jasper was still staring at the modern art piece sliding through his buttons when he turned to the hyenas behind him. Edward and Bella each tried to use the other to hide from his death-glare.

"It's not that funny," Jasper barked, obviously far from amused. His expression was still tight, and his hands remained in the air as though he couldn't touch it yet.

"Yeah, it is," Edward fell forward in wheezes, exposing Bella and her own fit of hysteria from behind him. "Never thought I'd 'preciate seeing someone get puked on...but that was better'n watchin' Rosie hogtie Cooter at the State Fair last year." The force of his laughs increased, and he fell backward onto the ground, holding his stomach.

"Awright, jackass," Jasper hissed. "Keep goin' and piss yer pants so's I kin have a laugh."

"STOP IT, BELLA!" Alice's demand was whiny and included a footstomp. Bella tried to curb it, but giggles were still bubbling. "Omigawwwd, I'm disgusting!"

Alice surveyed her clothing, which had received its own fair share of digestive decoration. Her arms spread wide, pulling the fabric away from her body. Bella was still stifling her laughter, but Jasper finally came to.

"Come on, darlin', let's get cleaned off!" He quickly hoisted her squealing, messy form over his shoulder and set off toward the creek.

Alice was keen to be carried, but soon found the quick pace and rough terrain was not helpful to a queasy, albeit now empty, stomach. "J-Jasper," she managed as they dodged through the trees. "I-I think I'ma barf again."

Instantaneously, Jasper slowed and stopped, carefully setting her to the ground. "Sorry." An apologetic smile crept across his face. "Guess I'll letcha try out yer own two feet the last hundred yards."

She wobbled for a moment, holding her stomach, before she grinned in response. "Why thank you, kind sir." She attempted a cheesy curtsy, but managed to snag her foot on a branch and pull a faceplant. Jasper did his best not to laugh. He failed.

"Shut up! I was upside down for most of the walk!" Alice scrambled to her feet and shot him a nasty glare. Fortunately, he found it absolutely adorable.

"Darlin', anyone ever tell you how beautiful you are when yer angry?"

Damn southern charm, Alice thought as her glare transformed to a coy blush. "No."

He moved a little closer. "Well, you are, but if I ever hope to kiss ya 'gain, we best git clean. 'Cause I just cain't stomach this smell anymore." His voice was low and making her naughtybits riot. Coupled with the wink he threw at her before grabbing her hand and leading her the rest of the way to the water, she contemplated jumping him right now.

Until she saw the creek. "Jasper. This is a river."

"Naw, it's just a creek, but it'll still get us clean."

She stepped out of her shoe and dipped a toe in the water. A stream of obscenities that could embarrass a sailor-turned-trucker flooded out of her mouth at the speed of light. "Fuck, Jasper! That is FREEZING!"

He pulled his boots off and stepped in up to his shins. "Aww, c'mon, tha's perfect!" Had he spoken Swahili, she would have had the same dumbstruck reaction. "Miss Alice," he continued mischievously. "I daresay I don' wanna upset ya, but if you don' git in yerself, I'ma have to help ya."

Her eyes went wide, almost bugging out, as she tried to back away from him and his predatory advances.

"Best to jus' jump on in and get it over with..." Jasper taunted with a wicked grin.

Alice made a quick turn to run and escape, but one shoe was already off and she tripped again. Bracing for impact, she never hit ground thanks to Jasper's quick step and strong arms.

The tiny hairs on the back of her neck stood on end as he tickled her earlobe with his lips and whispered, "This won't hurt a bit, darlin'."

Meanwhile, Edward was playin' the honorable host and showin' his sweetheart 'round their homebase for the next few days.

The cabin was spartan, and obviously not intended for four people to spend any extended amount of time in. A time-worn, evidently ancient bed was pushed into one corner, covered with a handmade quilt. It looked inviting to Bella, who suddenly realized how little sleep she'd gotten last night. Another corner framed two armchairs that had seen better days but still looked sturdy enough. Between them, a small table with an oil lamp, an ashtray, and a box of matches.

The kitchen—if you could call it that—took up the other half of the room. Standing center was a square table with gruesome gouges scattered over its scarred surface as though it'd been a butcher's block at one point in time. Two log benches sat beneath it for seating—no, really, they were literally two halves of a tree trunk with legs stuck into the bottom. Not too aesthetically pleasing but highly functional. The stove was the most interesting piece: it was a squat black sentinel standing in the corner. The three by three square stood on heavy iron legs, surrounded by bricks and river rocks in a protective hodge podge. The top had four circular pieces in it just like a modern stove, but they looked medieval. The door on the front had a large coiled handle, and Bella imagined it as a gaping maw with a fire from the depths of hell illuminating its laughing face. Still, it was a source of food and warmth, and she knew that she wanted to own one sometime in the future.

"Well it ain't much, but the roof don't leak, and it stays real warm with a fire goin'." Edward's understatement was obvious. He knew the girls were used to a bit more luxury than this, but it would just have to do.

"It's gorgeous, Edward," Bella whispered, leaning into him.

"Well, I'm glad you like it, Sugar, 'cause we could be here for a stretch." He wrapped his arms around her, and his breath was warm against her ear. She shivered involuntarily. "Are you cold? I could start a fire?" His arms pressed her closer to him, and she melted into his embrace.

"No. I'm not cold." She twisted within his arms to face him, placing her limbs around his slim waist, and tilted her head to stare up into his mossy eyes. His gaze was flipping between her eyes and her mouth. She hoped that meant he was finally going to kiss her. His face drifted closer to hers, and she could feel her heart thumping hard in her chest. Those tantalizing lips were a precious few millimeters away when the door burst open behind her, and Rosalie swept into the cabin like a twister. Edward simultaneously lifted Bella and shoved her behind him as he faced his cousin.

"Well, damn! Momma did always say I had worse timin' than the courthouse clock!" She sputtered as she took in the scene before her.

"Aunt Lillian never did tell a lie, and that analogy proves another point. You're never right more'n twice a day!" Edward proclaimed to Rosalie's shit-eating grin.

She made a face like she was baring fangs, and though it looked like she'd add her own barb, she spun and went back out the door. Edward then turned to a blushing Bella, "Sorry, Sugar...can we pick up that conversation later?" She grinned knowingly and nodded.

"Did you actually just leave her speechless?"

"It happens once in a while." He shrugged his broad shoulders sheepishly.

Rosalie had driven out to the hideaway with a burgeoning box of food items; some leftovers and some that could be prepared later. She also grabbed clothing for everyone. Alice was likely to lick her boots when she saw fresh clothes.

Just then the little pixie and Jasper appeared in the doorway, both soaked to the skin but cleaner than when they had left.

"Do I wanna know? Or should I just pretend not to have seen this?" Rose took in their appearance with a mixture of mirth and an all-knowing leer.

"Alice here done wretched all over Jasper after he kissed her!" Edward supplied eagerly.

"That ain't the whole story an' you know it, you clod-head!" Jasper shot back at his cousin. Mumbling under his breath, "At-least-I-got-a-kiss-shitferbrains!"

Rosalie must have heard the mumble, though, because she whacked Jasper across the back of the head.

"Ow! What was that fer?" He glared at her, rubbing the back of his head.

"Fer bein' a jackass, and takin' advantage of a drunk girl!" Rose's eye-daggers were digging into his forehead.

"It weren't like that at all, Rose. She kissed me, too," he argued, adding in a slightly hushed tone, "...and she liked it til she found out that I'd jus' had Cooter's nasty snot rag shoved in my mouth!"

"Ugh! Can we not repeat that again?" begged a slightly green Alice.

"Well, if the idjit hadn't started snickerin' like a sixth grader when y'all were tryin to bust us out the hoosegow, I wouldna had to put it there in the first daggum place!" Edward spouted in his defense.

"What were you doin' with—no, wait, I don' wanna know. Jus' shut yer pie holes. And you get yerself into some dry clothes, Jasper Monroe Cullen. You too, Tinkerbell!" She threw a bag at each of them and went out to get more supplies from the truck. Edward and Jasper smirked at each other as they followed her outside. Bella and Alice collapsed in a fit of giggles, searching the bags for fresh outfits.

You know folks, I done spent some time out at that there hidey-hole, an' I'm purty sure there's a outdoor shower on the backside o'the cabin. But I ain't gonna be the one to tell Miss Alice. Oooh lookee there, Rosie done brought fried chicken, baked beans and fried taters!

"I wish you coulda seen their faces!" Rosalie was perched on one of the benches at the table, spinning quite a true yarn about what transpired out front of the jail as the boys slipped out the back with Alice and Bella. "They was runnin' hell bent 'cross the street, screamin' for their momma's like the pussyboys they are! The smoke bombs were perfect, and they was billowin' huge clouds o'er the back of the buildin'. I sat in Uncle C's truck down the block, laughin' til I done near cried.

"They got most o' the ladies outta the building, and gone back in to get their purses. I could hear Momma Newton screechin' like a harpy, 'Git my purse, Michael Purvis! An' don't you dare look innit, neither! I know you's got them curious eyes!'"

The table erupted into a new wave of laughter. Jasper buried his face in Alice's shoulder as Bella slapped Edward on the back before he choked on his potatoes.

"I guess our blessed firemen were too busy playin cards to notice the alarm goin' off, 'cause it wun't 'til then the fire truck even showed up! But they got down to business, and I figured it was time for me to high-tail it outta there.

"Oh, and by the by, Emmett and Uncle C said they'd get the General Lee from the Boar's Nest and take it home later. Uncle C said to tell you gals that he's mighty proud of y'all, and he'll be out in the next couple of days to replenish your supplies."

Bella and Alice exchanged a worried look.

"So, just how long do you think we're going to have to stay here, Rose?" Alice was sitting on Jasper's leg, since the benches at the table only held four people comfortably. "I mean, you know, are the cops gonna be looking for us for a while? I can't believe I'm a fugitive from the law." She sighed heavily.

"Aw, honey, don' worry none," Rose reassured her. "Them two law dogs ain't got the nose to sniff out their own asses, let 'lone find a Cullen in hidin'. And they don't got no evidence againstcha even if they could find ya. Jus' relax. Enjoy the peace an' quiet out here."

Rose got a list of things that the girls wanted, promising to send it with Carlisle in a few days and made her goodbyes. "I've done spent up enough of yer time, an' I have to get home to start supper fer the fellas. Y'all behave yourselves, an' if'n you need me, use channel 24 on the CB. I'll keep the one in the kitchen on. I work tomorrow night, but Uncle C knows 'bout the channel, too."

With that, she hugged all four of them—much to the girls surprise, jumped in the pickup and drove off. The four outlaws settled in at the table again and played poker til the light started to fade.

"Maybe we should get a couple fires started, Jas. I'll take care of this 'un if you'll get the one outside." Jasper nodded in agreement and went out the door.

"Um, Edward?" Bella questioned. "Where is everyone going to sleep?"

He smiled reassuringly. "You and Alice are gonna take the bed there, an' Jas an' I will sleep outside. Rose brought our campin' gear. We'll be fine." His tone brooked no argument.

As Edward turned away to tend to the kitchen stove-contraption, Bella caught Alice's terribly unsubtle facial expressions trying to get her attention. Finally, her impatience took over and she stomped over and grabbed Bella by the arm, dragging her over to the other side of the room.

"I want alone time." Alice's voice was stretched thin between her clenched teeth.

"What?" Bella screwed up her face in confusion. "What the hell are you talking about, Alice?"

Edward conveniently chose that moment to interrupt. "This 'ere stove'll heat this entire cabin all night, and it's good to go. I'ma go help Jasper with the bonfire, so if you ladies care to join us..." He allowed his voice to trail off as he tipped his imaginary hat and, smirking, slipped out the door.

Bella was lost again to an Edward-induced haze until Alice went and stomped on her foot. "OWW!! Goddamn, Alice, do you need a time out?"

"You're not LISTENING to me!" She almost shouted. "I. Want. Alo—"

"I HEARD you, you obnoxious little twat," Bella interrupted harshly, tired of Alice's toddler-esque tantrums. She secretly wished Rosalie had left a quart of moonshine.... "Now my question is—"

Alice returned the interruption. "WITH. JASPER."

"Oh holy hell, Ali, you'll get it, okay?" She rolled her eyes. "And I'm going to kiss Edward Cullen if I have to put superglue on my lips and tackle him."

"That's it? Just kiss him?" Alice looked incredulous.

"Gotta start somewhere."

"Prude."

"Bitch."

"Awww, Bella, I love you!"

Oh my God, she's still drunk, Bella mused to herself. She wove her arm through her tinier counterpart's and directed them outside. "Come on, hornball. Show me how you're gonna roast your southernboy over an open flame."

"NONONONO!" She dug in her heels and pulled against Bella's grasp. "Tell Jasper he needs to come inside. I'm, uh, still not feeling too well. You know, all that moonshine and whatnot."

Bella stared at her. "You're kidding me, right? You're fine! You just had a big meal and your coloring looks normal. Finally. I think Rosalie even brought marshmall—"

Alice quirked an eyebrow in challenge. Bella's shoulders dropped in realization.

"So, I get to sleep on the ground tonight is what you're saying," Bella huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I'm sick, Bella. I need comfort." She peeked out the tiny window near the door. "I need comfort in the form of that sexy, tattooed man out there...STAT."

"Fine, Alice! Be that way!" Bella slammed the door and stomped back over to the campfire. "Jasper, you need to get your sexy tattooed ass in there and COMFORT my SICK friend! UGH!"

Jasper's face was a mixture of joy and confusion, but he was taught when a woman said jump, he was to ask how high. So, off he went with nary a word, shoving a bottle into Edward's hand.

Bella took her spot next to Edward, grabbed the bottle out of his hand, and took a big swig followed by a pained grimace. "Christ on a donkey! Is that paint thinner?" You'd think that kinda reaction would mean she'd stop, but she tipped the bottle and took another smaller slug.

Edward just looked on, awed at the fortitude of the beauty next to him. He'd been drinkin' Carlisle's 'shine since he was a teen and still couldn't handle too much of it. 'Course she proved she was a girl after his own heart the other night at the Boar's Nest: whiskey drinkin', pool hustlin', dancin' on bars. The only thing that could make her even better was if she loved campin'.

She sighed and passed the bottle back to him. He corked it and slid his arm around her shoulder. "I miss camping with my dad," she said softly. "We used to sit around the campfire for hours."

Hallelujah! Holy Lord, his prayers had been heard and answered, and he hadn't even had to ask forgiveness for something first.

"Well, Jasper and I camp all the time. There's not much to do around this sleepy little town, 'less you like high speed car chases." She giggled and leaned further into his side, then shivered. "C'mere sugar, lemme snuggle you. We might be out here for a while." He shifted her into his lap between his legs and wrapped his strong arms around her.

"I think it's gonna be all night, Edward. Alice has no intentions of letting that man out of bed til daylight comes."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing, then, 'cause I have no intention of lettin' you out of my arms til daylight." His embrace tightened and pulled her in closer. Bella wiggled and hummed in contentment, a smile reverberating throughout her body. Edward put his lips to her ear and whispered, "Sugar, ever made love in front of a campfire?" She let out a little moan, and shook her head. "Me either. What'dya say we find out what it's like?"

She twisted her head towards his, and their lips met with a feather soft touch that soon grew as hot as the fire they sat near. His warm hands ran over her curves, slow but insistent, as she melted into his touch. She reached back to run her fingers through his gloriously tousled hair, and small groans of pleasure tumbled over his lips.

"Mmmm...Bella, can I take your shirt off, Sugar?"

"Yes, Edward, you don't need to ask." Her response was breathy and quick, echoed by her movement to straddle him. She cupped his face with her hands and kissed the lines of his sculpted chin.

"Yes, I do, Sugar. A gentleman never assumes." His hands reached down to the hem of her shirt and slowly lifted it up and over her head. His eyes drank in her pale skin, which glowed like a ripe peach in the firelight. "Lord have mercy, you are a beautiful thing." His tone was reverent, and Bella blushed profusely. He gently eased her down onto his open sleeping bag and moved above her, holding himself up slightly so as not to crush her.

Their lips tangled again in a slow dance, while his hands explored her torso. Her arms were gently locked around his shoulders and her dainty hands were slowly pulling his shirt higher, urging him to remove it. He obliged, momentarily pulling away from her, and returning as quick as a wink. Her eyes ran over his chest and down to his six pack, one hand shadowing her gaze, her lightly trailing fingers tickling his skin.

He glanced back to her face and saw her biting her bottom lip, a gesture he'd noticed more and more over the last couple of days. Lowering his lips back to hers he pulled that pouty bottom lip between his and sucked on it lovingly. She tasted like 'shine and honey. He slowly moved down her neck, licking and nibbling her skin like it was the sweetest fruit he'd ever tasted.

Their hands became their eyes as they learned each other's bodies, one rough and calloused, the other soft and yielding. As time swept by, more clothes were lost with whispered words and acknowledgements, revealing new skin for hands and lips to explore and conquer.

When they were both naked as the day they were born, he paused, "I'll stop if you want me to, Sugar, this isn't…" she put her hand over his mouth to stop his yammering.

"Edward, I don't want you to stop," she declared.

"What about a condom…I think I—"

"I'm on the pill," her eagerness cut him off. "And please call me 'Sugar' again; it makes my insides melt." She giggled at her own confession. He grinned ear to ear.

"Whatever you say, Sugar." She giggled again.

He lowered his weight lightly onto her body, their curves and planes meeting perfectly, seemingly meant for each other. Her body opened for him and pressed up to meet him as they molded together. He covered her shoulders with light kisses, gently running his hand over her breasts, and down to her warmth, sliding his fingers over her sensitive flesh. She was writhing under him, whimpering and moaning; his attentions bringing her to the edge. He heard her gasp his name as he removed his hand and slowly moved into her.

The firelight reflected in her eyes as they moved together in unison, flickers of firelight painting dancing patterns on their united form. Heat spun and rose, swayed and cast to the sky, refusing to die until every last twig was ash. It would seem anything flammable within a mile's radius would be consumed and incinerated. The blaze grew in size and intensity cresting at its pinnacle, powerful and breathtaking.

The crackling of the fire continued into the night, flames licking the night sky, eventually dwindling down to glowing embers.

Oh, and the bonfire was pretty hot, too.

Ahem, well…yeah, so - did any y'all catch that game on Sunday? tap tap tap *taps on screen* Hello? I can see some o' y'all are, ummm, preoccupied, so uh, I'll just be in my bunk.

I have a feelin' y'all's gon' be needin' the undies button or whatever the hell it is next chap, too. Let's jus' say those coupla small cabin windows 'er foggin' up...

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A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review. We promise to TRY to update sooner next chap.