Alright, here's chapter two, if you were interested.

Atlantia45

Disclaimer: Yeah we all know the REAL owners

Haruhi's eyes had almost adjusted to the dark, but it didn't help as much. She began yanking and shaking her chains causing them to rattle, but there was no way to detach them.

"Damn. Those rich bastards. They must be having fun, making fun of me." Haruhi grumbled to herself.

Suddenly, she heard a door creak open and slam. Light filled the room and hurt Haruhi's eyes. As soon as her eyes weren't as blurred she could finally see where she was.

"What is this?" Haruhi squinted and looked around her. It was as if she were locked in a cheesy love motel. The décor resembled hearts along with the heart shaped bed. Not to mention her outfit. A pink, satin, lace heart strewn dress, with matching metal, heart imprinted, handcuffs.

"Ugh. What the hell?" Haruhi murmured as she looked around. "This is hideous…"

"WOW Haru-chan! You look so cute!" Haruhi quickly turned towards the voice.

"Honey? Mori? Oh thank God! Please you have got to get me out of here. I don't know where the key-"

"Why would we do that?" Honey said quirkily. Mori nodded in agreement.

"But, you're. No, you're not going to-"

"This is the first trial! Hooray! Right Mori?" Honey turned to his companion in with a giant grin. Mori nodded in agreement…again. Haruhi began to panic and frantically started to fidget in the bed.

"Come on guys? You don't have to resort to this right? You remember all the good times we've been together right? Come on! Just-" Honey gave a sweet smile and leaped on to the bed next to Haruhi.

"Haru-chan! This is the only way!" Honey turned to Mori and nodded him over. Haruhi grimaced at what she was destined for.

"Haru-chan, I don't know if you know but…" Honey began to giggle at this little secret of his. Mori stood beside the bed and began stripping out of his clothing.

Haruhi distressed began yanking on the chain violently. "No! No please. Guys! This is a joke right?"

" 'Fraid not!" Honey said with an enormous grin. Mori, now topless walked towards the bed.

"God! Help me!"

"Do it now Mori." Honey snapped his fingers.

"NO!"

"Strike a pose Mori!" Honey cheered.

"Wha-What? Pose?" Mori began making "Mr. Universe"-esque poses. It is as though he were posing for a photographer.

"Yeah! PERFECT! That's right! Exactly as we rehearsed it!" Honey chanted. Haruhi on the other hand wasn't sure whether she should be grateful that her imminent doom was to witness Mori model.

"Um…Honey. What is going on?" Haruhi said, astounded at how ludicrous Mori's poses had become.

"Eh? You don't know Haru-chan? Well I'm not surprised! Right Mori?" Mori nodded his head in agreement.

"Could you just explain what's going on!" Haruhi became extremely frustrated at her shota-con sempai.

"Well, this is the only way." Honey said merrily.

" "Only way" for what?" Haruhi said even more irritated than before.

"The only way we can see who you're canon pairing is!" Honey said, beaming from ear to ear.

"What?" Haruhi muttered in astonishment.

"Your canon pairing! We can't have our fans constantly fighting over who you should be paired with! So this is the only way we can find out!" Honey resumed his position as both cheerleader and director for Mori as Haruhi leaned back onto the pink heart shaped pillows of the pink room.

"When will this be over?" Haruhi grumbled.

"As soon as you decide! Now Mori seduce her!" Honey jumped off the bed and began cheering. Haruhi's face contorted in shock. Mori leaned in towards Haruhi's face, wearing his typical stoic face. He stared deeply into her eyes and she into his.

After a few minutes of this Haruhi cocked her brow, "You have no idea what you are doing are you." Mori nodded his head in agreement.

"Did Honey tell you to do that to "seduce" me?" Haruhi leaned back unimpressed as Mori pulled away nodding in agreement.

"Aww! Haru-chan! That was the "sexiest" thing a man could do to seduce a woman! Aww!" Honey groaned, teary eyed. Haruhi turned her head towards Honey apathetic.

She stared at Honey blankly, "Honey, do you know what "sexy" or "seduce" even means?"

"Not really!" Honey grinned as Mori nodded his head in agreement.

Haruhi sighed and shut her eyes, "Are you guys done?"

Honey pouted, sounding very disappointed, "Yeah." Mori nodded his head in agreement as he dressed back up.

"It's alright, Mori! There are plenty of fish in the sea!" Honey said happily in an attempted to cheer up a not so disappointed Mori.

"Yeah! There will be other women Mori! Just you wait and see!" Honey said once again reassuring Mori, albeit unnecessary. Honey continued to "cheer up" Mori as they left the room.

"Hey, hey guys! Can you get me out of here? GUYS!" Haruhi was stranded once again unsure of what's to come.

Just realized this is a crack fic. Sorry if you thought there was an actual plot. I hope I was misleading at first. Thanks. See ya!

Atlantia45