Naruto sat on the stool of his favorite ramen restaurant, watching as Konoha civilians walked about in Kimonos and whatever else people wear to festivals. Though the night had just begun, many people wobbled about, already intoxicated. Naruto slid off the stool (after eating 9034630469 bowls of ramen) and glanced around for anyone he knew. He was dressed in a kimono styled top that had a Vulpix (Y'know, that fox Pokemon thing?) on the front that Sasuke had knitted for him; and a pair of blue, fleece samurai pants with duckies on them. So you could say he was looking pretty fly.

He watched as a group of children chased Chouji around with a stick screaming 'PINATA! PINATA!!' Naruto laughed to himself. Oh, those ever playful children…

He saw plenty of couples everywhere. There was Lee trying to drag Gaara out of the corner…Kiba trying to drag Shikamaru out of his sleep…Temari trying to drag Hinata into wearing some lower-cut tops at a nearby store…Ino trying to drag Chouji (A nearly impossible task) to the gym…And, of course, TenTen dragging Kankuro by a pair of handcuffs. Ah, yes, love was in the air!

Naruto turned off in the direction of the ramen place (It has a name, I swear…) to stuff his face once more, but couldn't help but feel he was forgetting about something…something that had been bothering him so very badly the previous night…or something…

"Oh well!" Naruto shrugged and skipped merrily off to the ramen stand.

Shino stared at the ticket on his bedside table. The festival had begun already. But he wasn't going. He'd already decided. He never went to things like this, so why start now?

Of course, Naruto did invite him…sort of. But maybe…Maybe it was a prank! They'd all set it up just to see if Shino would actually show up. Then they'd all know that-

'Know what?' Shino thought to himself. 'There's nothing to know. He gave me that ticket because whoever he bought it for couldn't go. That's it. And I'm not going. But…even if I did… it's not like he would notice anyways...'

Very true, Shino. Naruto never noticed him, after all. And when he did happen to notice the 3D shadow, he had no clue as to who he was…But it's not like Shino cared. Not in the very least. He was just thinking more than usual, that's all.

And he was most certainly not going to that festival. No siree Bob...

"Hello, Naruto…" A monotone voice greeted from behind the blonde.

Naruto screamed in surprise and jumped 82.7 feet in the air. Then landed with a swan dive. He received a perfect 10 from the judges.

"Shino??" He asked through his still shaken voice. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"I'm…sorry…" Naruto raised an eyebrow. Shino never apologized. He was Shino, after all.

"What's the deal, Shino? You never say sorry for anything! Of course, you hardly ever speak at all…" He grinned cheerfully. "Whatcha doin here? You never come to anything fun like this! Oh wait, let me guess…There's and endangered bug species nearby you have to go save?"

Shino didn't respond. He knew it. Naruto was just getting rid of some of his garbage. He didn't even remember giving him the ticket. Bastard.

"Ng…" Shino grunted stiffly as Naruto suddenly smacked him across the back.

"I'm just kidding!" He rubbed closely to the other and slowly (and sensually!) wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Did you think I would forget our wonderfully romantic date?" He asked smoothly while pulling the Aburame man closer.

Shino froze even more than usual, an uncharacteristic look mixed with shock, embarrassment and confusion on his face.

Two fingers moved to Shino's face and gently slid the round frames down his nose and a pair of blue eyes stared intently at his own. If Shino were the gulping type, he would have gulped. But he's not so he didn't. What should he do? Naruto was just staring at him! …Again! He didn't have the slightest clue what to say, much less do (Seriously, stop thinking that!). Luckily, he didn't have to do a thing, as Naruto then proceeded to burst out into hysterical gales of laughter.

"Did Shino just get played??"

"I think Naruto turned him on!!"

Shino broke out of his shock at the sound of new voices and looked around the room that had moments before been empty except for Naruto and himself.

A group of three young girls had stopped to view the guy's lovely moment. People had witnessed him losing his permanent cool. They were giggling to themselves, and later would tell all their friends. Because that's what girl's do. Naruto was still about to bust a spleen from all his laughter.

"S-Sh-S-s-s-Shino!!" He stuttered, his eyes streaming. "You should've seen the look on your face!!" Shino's ever present frown darkened, the Doom Aura sending the girl's off on their way (to tell their friends!).

Shino's arms, which he had been trying so hard to keep in a casual position, folded back across his front as usual. He roughly shoved his glasses back up to cover his eyes once again, and in his irritation he almost jabbed his eye out. He started to back out of the ramen stand. He had actually gone out of his way, gone off of his never-be-social routine, gone to an outdoor party…Because he thought this guy wanted him to? Shino was mad. Furious, actually. He was mad at Naruto for making a fool out of him. It was only in front of a few people, but what he did was just ridiculous. He was furious at himself for ever coming in the first place. Why had he convinced himself to accept the 'invitation'? Why had he trusted Naruto of all people?

He looked once more at the man having some sort of seizure on the floor.

"Naruto." Naruto suddenly stopped laughing when he heard the sternness in Shino's voice. He looked up at him? "I have to go." So he did.

Naruto quickly got up in a huff, putting his hands on his hips. "Can't you take a joke?!...Wait, he's Shino, no he can't…"

Shino walked quickly through the crowded streets, everyone's drunkass faces becoming a blur to him. "HEEEEEEEEEYYYYY SHIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO-KUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNN." Shino stopped in his tracks.

"Lee. Have you been drinking?" He turned around to face Bruce Lee's biggest fan.

"What do you think?" Gaara muttered, one of Lee's arms slung around his shoulders as the spandex-clad man tried to do a back bend.

"Shhhhhinnnnnno…." Lee slurred, lunging for the man in front of him. Unfortunately, he saw three of said men and he went for the one on the right. He plowed into the ground in a dramatic-type way. Gaara sighed and used his sand to make a floating chair for the drunken lad. Lee grabbed another bottle of booze from absolutely nowhere as the chair formed underneath him. "Shinnnoo, you look shhaaaad. Here, you should hash shometing to drink!" He held out a heavily wobbling arm to the Shino on the left.

Shino took the bottle for the mere sake of preventing anymore of the beverage from spilling on the ground. Glancing around as Lee passed out, Shino noticed the green beast wasn't the only one entirely intoxicated.

Temari was copping a feel on Hinata in a no-so-very concealed area, causing the smaller girl's face to turn all shades of red; all the while responding the blonde's sweet, heartfelt word's of 'C'mon, baby, no one's watching…' with the equally sentimental, 'N-N-No! Not here! Where are you putting your hand?! KYAAAAA!!'

Shikamaru and Kiba were sitting on a bench making out- Well actually, it wasn't so much mutual tongue-wrestling as it was Kiba simply ravishing the not-exactly-consenting Shikamaru's mouth.

TenTen was (THIS PARAGRAPH HAS BEEN CENSORED FOR THE SAKE OF THE READER.) Kankuro.

After throwing up, Shino turned his attention back towards Lee and Gaara; then quickly shot his gaze away, as Lee was doing some-er-unmentionable things.

Sighing on the inside, Shino subconsciously gripped the booze bottle tighter and made his way to a brightly lit and poorly decorated building.

"I'll drink any one of you under the table!! Come on!!" Tsunade shouted, pumping a fist curled around a small sake cup in the air.

Standing in the doorway, Shino peered in at the sight before his shaded eyes. All the old geezers of the village (Kakashi, Tsunade, Jiraiya, Iruka, Kurenai…ya know, all the old people!) were gathered around the long bar and seemed to be involved in some sort of drinking game. There were empty sake bottles scattered all about, and after taking a look at the faces of the patrons, Shino thanked God that the village wasn't currently under attack. Shino took a few steps forward to get a better view.

"Hey there, purdy lady!" Jiraiya slurred, leaning towards him as he approached. "How's about you and me go back to my place…and you know…get to knowww each other?" Then he blacked out and fell to the ground.

"Shino, why don't you join us?" Tsunade asked, turning around on her stool and propping her elbows on the bar behind her.

"Shino would never do such a thing!" Kurenai said as she crawled all over Asuma. "Or would he?" Then the two of them burst out laughing for no apparent reason.

Seeing as he had nothing better to do, Shino seated himself next to Tsunade…But he had no intention of drinking. None whatsoever. Shino gripped the bottle tighter. But…why shouldn't he? He was a fun guy, after all! Totally cool and with it! He'd have one drink. Just one.

And Shino did. A few moments after his first sip, his gloomy mood began to lighten. Maybe he could have just one more…And another…

"S-So many…" He stutter-mumbled after he'd downed three bottles. "You know what…" His head rolled. "I think I'm gonna go fuck around!"

"That's the spirit, Shino!" Iruka cheered.

"Go for it!" Kakashi echoed.

Shino exited, head held high and his long jacket halfway unbuttoned.

"Cute kid." Tsunade said upon his leave. "Hey Iruka! I've always wondered…"

"Yes Hokage-Sama?"

Their flushed gazes met. Their eyes wide and sparkling. Could it be a confession of love?!

"How the fuck did you get that scar on your nose?"

"You know…I'm not really sure…"

"Naruto."

Fox-boy jerked around from his ramen stand stool. "Shino? You came back! Look I'm really sorry about…S-Shino?!" Shino had tried to take a step forward, but that's kind of hard when you see five floors layered on top of each other. He crashed into Naruto, sending them both to the floor. Shino stared down deliriously at the boy he had just fallen on top of.

This is your chance, self. Go for it! Drunken Shino put on a semi-charming smile and attempted a hair-flip; but seeing as how he had some funky afro thing with no bangs, it didn't exactly work out. "We have got to stop meeting like this."

Naruto looked at him confused for a moment, looked deep in thought, then grinned. "Oh, sure Shino!" He laughed, "You had me there for a minute!" His smiled slowly faded as the other man remained on top of him. "Um, Shino, you can get off me now…"

"Your hair is so yellowwwww…"

"Shino? …Are you drunk?"

"I'm a fairy princess!"

"Shino, I'm going to take you home, okay?"

"Peanut brittle!"

Half-dragging the other man along, Naruto made his way up Shino's staircase. "Shino, where's your key?"

"Goodnight."

Naruto sighed. He could kick the door in, but when Shino awoke in the morning, he might pummel his ass…

"Well, I guess this is the only option!" Naruto stated (a little too happily), shrugged, and shoved a hand inside Shino's coat.

He began feeling around for the keys (Yeah, right…), starting from the torso and moving down. His hand suddenly went to a certain area where keys just wouldn't be. Shino moaned. Naruto froze. For at least a full five minutes (Move that hand!) Naruto didn't move. Slowly, he released the other man, who was now gripping the railing with one hand.

He swallowed. "S-Shino, can you give me you key?"

Shino groaned, this time it was caused by his drunken state, and fished the key out of one of his many pockets. "Here you are…"

Naruto put the key in the lock and opened the door, entering with Shino following slowly. Naruto laid the key on a table and turned to leave, only to see Shino slamming the door.

"Would you like some tea?" He asked, slowly approaching the blonde shinobi.

"Um…" Naruto swallowed again, this time with more difficulty. "I should probably get going…"

Placing a hand on Naruto's shoulder, Shino used his other to remove his tinted spectacles. "Thank you for walking me home, darling." He batted his eyes while striking a girly pose.

"Shino are you o-WOAH!" Shino collapsed mid-pose in Naruto's arms, his intoxication finally doing him in. "Geeze…" Naruto sighed and pulled Shino towards his bed, then laid him upon it.

" 'Night Shino." He turned to go, but was halted by a tugging on his sleeve.

"Where are you going?" Naruto turned, only to be pulled down on top of the bug freak. "I can't believe you're going to leave me all alone when I am clearly ill. I bet you wouldn't leave Hinata or Kiba."

Naruto stared for a moment in surprise at the darkening eyes beneath him, then smiled. "God…You're such a baby, Shino…"

And he most certainly did not leave Shino that night. No siree Bob.

A/N: OH GOD. I'm so sorry. Four months and this is all I could come up with. Luckily, I don't think anyone is keeping up with this piece of crap. But at least it's longer, right? RIGHT?! -Shot- Okay, here are your options (Who the fuck am I talking to? No one is reading this.). I can attempt a lemon for the next chapter...or not. OR A MINI CHAPTER ABOUT HOW SHINO IS THE KING OF FERNGULLY. Pick one. NAOPLZ. HELLO? IS ANYONE THERE?!

FLAME ON!