Hey! I'm back! This chapter is a little short, but that's because I really just wanted to get something done. Something that I have been planning since the beginning of this story!
This week was epic. I'm out of school, I had my birthday party, I got my hair done, and now I get to fuck with your brains. Yay. I am extremely happy. And if you're not, kiss my ass.
Okay, onto the chaos! *runs for cover*
Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush! Trust me! If I did, there wouldn't be a need to write this! We'd all be getting our daily dose of gay just by watching it! (Not that I don't with Big Time Crib, but you catch my drift.)
Warnings: Yaoi, slash, guy on guy, that genre! Foul language and later on some serious, explicit smexing. No likey, no read-y!
No one ever told me it would be like this. I mean, sure, they say that life is unfair and all that shit. But did they ever stop to realize that maybe, just maybe, a few hints would stop people from trying to kill themselves?
Not that I was that far gone. No, I was just trying to get my anger and depression out.
But I was a busy kid. Between keeping my secrets, trying to lose weight (Gustavo told me to), attempting to be mushy around James, containing my anger towards John for everything, practice, and refusing to be Gustavo's little bad boy lap dog, I was exhausted.
Too bad I couldn't sleep without Nyquill half the time.
One day, while we were hanging out by the pool, Logan glanced up and commented on Wayne Wayne.
"He really should pull up his pants. We all see your boxers. You have no ass, we get it!" He said jokingly. Carlos cracked up.
"Dude, you sounded so guy right then!" The Latino sniggered. Logan shrugged, smiling.
"You know it's true." He said.
"It maybe be. But the dude's a douche." I grumbled. I had been slightly pissy, what with my stress, but I really hoped that the others didn't notice.
"Damn straight." Logan agreed. "Seriously. What the fuck is the posse for?"
"I know right?" I replied, glad that someone was sharing my thoughts out loud. Bonus – it was Logan! "At least if it was just him, I could beat the shit out of him. Bleh. Damn posers."
Logan laughed. Oh, god, I could listen to that laugh all day. I could cope with anything that concerned Logan.
Looking around, I made an odd discovery. "Where's James?"
Logan and Carlos gave me quizzical looks. "Isn't he your responsibility?" They asked in unison.
I shrugged. "I was mentally ranting at Wayne Wayne." I scratched the back of my head, doing a 360.
"Kendall!"
Looking over, I saw James hurrying towards me with two smoothies. I laughed as he finally stopped in front of me, holding one of them out to me.
"Strawberry, your favorite!" He cried.
"Aw, thanks, babe." I gushed, taking the smoothie and kissing him on the cheek. I immediately felt that morning's NutriGrain bar bubbling up to my throat. Oh, god…
Suddenly, there was an obnoxious ringing noise. James, Logan, and I looked over at Carlos, whose face turned bright red. He reached for his phone, looking irritated as he rejected the call.
Logan and I shared an equally confused look while, as I noticed, James gave Carlos an annoyed look.
"Carlos," he started in a low, warning tone. "May I talk to you in private for a moment?" At James' almost growled words, Carlos looked scared, but nodded. The two walked off, out of earshot.
Logan and I shifted closer. "I feel like I missed something." He muttered to me.
"Same here, bro." I said, sighing.
"Well, you know me, I would love to sit here and watch this unfold and become a big pile of shit, but I think I'm gonna go take a walk. I'll be back in an hour or something." Logan said, slipping his sneakers back on.
"Alright." I said. "Have fun. Try not to get mugged." I joked. He laughed as he walked off. I looked around the pool area, looking for Wayne Wayne; I wouldn't be surprised if he just popped up to piss us off. For some reason, though, he was nowhere to be found.
James walked up to me. "Hey, I'm gonna take Carlos to a park or something. There's just this thing that we need to talk about and I don't trust the people here at the Palm Woods. Gossip spreads like wildfires and that's the last thing that we need, because then Gustavo would be barking up our asses. See you later." He said quickly.
"Uh, yeah. See you." It was more of a half-question than an agreement, but it was enough to give James a good feeling, so he left with Carlos in tow. Carlos looked back at me with wide eyes. I waved to him, grinning. He pissed James off, that was his fault.
I sat back down in my chair. Offhandedly, I wondered why everyone thought that Logan would be the one getting kicked out. Especially if people thought that I was the leader. Let's face it – Wayne Wayne was a power hungry man whore. If he wanted Big Time Rush as his own, he had to get rid of the unofficial 'leader'. I guess people just didn't understand that.
Eventually, though, my thoughts bored me. I needed to multitask; it was just me. I stood up, stretching. I started walking, not really caring where I was going. I just had to move.
"Please get off!"
I froze. That sounded…like…
LOGAN?
I peered through the bushes I found myself in. I saw Logan cowering against a tree, a figure almost towering over him. That figure…holy shit, it was Wayne Wayne!
That bastard was bisexual?
I tried to keep my breathing normal and quiet so as not to give my presence away. Over my dead body would that poser touch Logan! I gritted my teeth in anger. Curse words and phrases ran free in my mind, my eyes focused on the scene in front of me.
Wayne Wayne chuckled darkly. "Well since you asked nicely…" He leaned in closer to Logan, almost shielding the smaller boy from my sight. "I will. Get off, that is."
Logan's eyes widened even more as he realized his unfortunate choice of words. His eyes searched around as he babbled, trying to convince Wayne Wayne to stop. His gaze immediately found me just as he uttered, "I-I'm not…"
I put a finger to my lips to silently say, 'Act as if I'm not here!' He took a shaky exhale as Wayne Wayne pulled away.
"You're not what? Gay? Of course you aren't, Mitchell." He growled sarcastically as he grabbed Logan by the ass, making the genius gasp and whimper in shock and disgust. "Of course you aren't."
That's when I snapped, letting loose of any and all plans that I had been formulating. This bastard was going down. Hard.
"Yo, bitch! Get your fucking hands offa him!" I yelled. Wayne Wayne whirled around to face me. His sunglasses were falling down his nose, revealing his eyes that were glazed over with anger and lust.
"Well-well, if it's not Kendork." He growled, his fist clenching. Logan pressed himself as much as he could up against the tree, as if trying to disappear in it. "Stay outta shit that ain't your biz-biz."
"Actually, when it involves Logan, it is my biz-biz." I hissed, stalking up to him. "I suggest you stay away from my friends, bastard."
Wayne Wayne laughed incredulously. "And what the fuck are you gonna do to me? I got a posse, dude."
"True." I admitted. I saw Logan suddenly look scared and mouth to himself, 'I'm gonna get raped. Oh, god, I'm gonna get raped and Kendall's gonna get beaten!' "But you're forgetting, dude, I played hockey back in Minnesota."
"So?" He asked.
"So, I can beat the shit out of you. And I will. Now." I cracked my knuckles as he started saying something. Suddenly, my fist made contact with his face. I heard a loud, sickening crunch. I couldn't tell if it was my hand or his nose. Logan gasped.
"Mother-!" Wayne Wayne yelped, clutching his nose, which was now flowing freely with blood. I shook out my hand, my face passive.
"And that's what happens when you mess with me and my friends." I snarled, baring my teeth slightly. He looked up at me, his eyes livid with anger and pain. "Now fuck off, bitch. Run to your fucking posse. I'm sure they'll be a good few shoulders to cry on."
He sounded like he was going to say something, before his eyes flew to my hand. I looked down and saw his blood on my knuckles. I smirked triumphantly. As I looked up, he stumbled away, practically tripping on his droopy pants.
I turned to Logan, who was still trembling. I approached him gingerly; he was scared out of his usual, logical mind. I could see on his face that he was thinking through everything, asking himself where he went wrong, what he did, and how he could have changed the outcome of, well, everything. But he kept coming up short an answer. "Logie?"
-Logan's POV-
"Please get off!"
I heard my own voice, sounding an octave higher than normal and shaky and desperate. Desperate for freedom. The heavy body leaning over and on me was scaring me, as well as the wild look in his eyes. I was breathing deeply, my mind racing.
"Well, since you asked nicely…" He leaned in closer to me, his hot breath on my ear. "I will. Get off, that is." He licked the shell of my ear, making me shiver in fear.
My eyes widened as I realized just how bad a decision it was to use those words. Oh, fuck, my brain was shutting down. Not good. Not good. C'mon, don't shut down. Fuck, fuck, fuck!
"Don't…please, no…not there!...please, no…" I whimpered, trying to get him off of me, just as his hands started traveling along my body. My eyes searched everywhere, calculating every single detail I could possibly take in, when my eyes reached Kendall. "I-I'm not…"
He put a finger to his lips. Just act like I'm not here, he was saying. My breath caught in my throat. Was he just going to sit there and watch? Please, get me out of here.
But then I saw it. In his eyes. He was thinking. He was plotting and scheming, attempting to find me a way out of this mess. I gulped and turned my eyes to my feet as Wayne Wayne pulled away from me.
"You're not what, Mitchell? Gay? Of course you aren't," he rumbled sarcastically, his hand groping my ass now. I gasped, jumping slightly. I heard a whimper escape into the world and only realized after a few seconds that it had come out of my mouth. "Of course you aren't."
"Yo, bitch! Get your fucking hands offa him!" Kendall yelled, coming out of his hiding spot. I breathed a sigh of relief as Wayne Wayne turned away from me. I took slow, shaky breaths to calm myself and my body down as I took a mental roll call.
Let's see…no broken bones, no bruises, the only injuries I have are emotional. I should get over those soon enough, as long as I stay close to…
I felt my breath catch in my throat as the name came up automatically.
Kendall.
He just saved my virginity, possibly my life, but he didn't even know. Well, he obviously knew that he just saved me from being raped, but he thought that John and I had fucked. We hadn't. No. I was probably just a whore in his opinion, just an insatiable little bitch that couldn't protect himself, and here he was, punching a guy in the face for me.
"Logie?"
My eyes snapped over to my left side, where Kendall stood. He looked sympathetic and worried. I tried to say something, but felt more tears flooding my eyes. My body overwhelmed my mind as I flew into his arms, wrapping my arms around him, sobbing into his chest, caring no longer who or where we were.
I felt his arms curl around me, his hand stroking my back gently. "It's okay, Logie. It's okay. It's over, I promise."
I shook my head desperately, wanting so bad to tell him that I was sorry for him having to defend me. "I…I'm sorry…!" I choked out.
"What?" He asked. "You shouldn't be sorry. It's not your fault." He said softly, holding me tighter. I clenched his shirt in my hands.
"I-I should…be able…to fight f-f-for m-myself…" I stammered.
"Oh, Logie," he sighed. "You were shaken, and scared, it's okay. Really. Don't worry about it." He kept rubbing my back, which was actually partially working.
"But-" I started.
He cut me off. "Logie. Please, stop worrying." He pulled away just enough so he could look at my face. "Why don't you call John? I'm sure he'll make you feel better."
I nodded, my mind automatically telling me to just do what Kendall said. "Please wait for him with me." I pleaded.
He smiled. "Of course." He said, hugging me close again. I took out my phone, seeing just how much my hands were shaking. I speed-dialed John.
"Hey, Loges. What's up?" He greeted.
"C-can you c-c-come over here? S-something h-happened…and, and I-I need y-you. P-please." I stuttered.
He paused, shocked. "Absolutely! I'll be right over!" I heard his voice in the background, "Yo, someone cover my shift. I got a boyfriend to deal with." Then he was back to the foreground. "Okay, I'm going."
"Okay. Th-thanks." I said, then hung up. I clung to Kendall again. "He's coming." I announced.
"Okay," Kendall said, sitting us down on the ground. "Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere."
I nodded, turning my head so I could breathe and hear his heartbeat through his shirt.
"Did he hurt you?" He asked after a minute.
I shook my head. "I-I'm all good. Really. Just some emotional trauma. If I stay close enough to you guys and don't get stressed all that much, I'll be back to normal in a week." I said, my voice steadying out.
"If you say so." He said. I smiled up at him.
"Thanks for being here." I said. He smiled back.
"Like hell I wouldn't be. You're my best friend. I'm always gonna be here for you." He said.
I'm happy about that.
**FF TO DAY AFTER BAD-BOY-OFF**
And when I look up into the sky
I think I'll know just what I'll find
I'll see your face and I'll know my place
Right beside you
Just as the bridge was finished, my phone started going off. Toxic. I blushed, knowing that I had just interrupted the practice. For the second time this month.
I answered quickly. "Uh, hey, John. What's up?"
"Yo, I'm horny. Can we fuck?" John's slurred voice crackled through the phone.
I frowned, memories flooding back to me. "Are you drunk?" I asked softly, turning away from everyone.
"Just a lil' buzzed." He replied, giggling.
I sighed heavily. "I'm hanging up."
"What? No!" He cried.
"Sorry, babe. Call me when you're sober." I said quietly, then hung up. I turned off my phone as I turned back to everyone. "Sorry about that." I laughed nervously.
"What happened?" Carlos asked.
"He was drunk." I replied. He, James, and Kendall all made sympathetic faces. I waved my hand dismissively. "I'll be fine."
"Um…" Kelly started. "Who's he?"
"John." I replied.
"His boyfriend." Carlos elaborated, pointing at me with his thumb. I nodded, smiling shyly.
Gustavo's face blanched as his jaw dropped. "You're gay?"
"Kendall and James are in a relationship." I said, throwing them under the bus. I sniggered at their panicked looks.
"You're all gay?" Kelly asked.
"I'm pretty sure." James said. "Carlos?"
Carlos gave James a 'bitch please' look. "James. You of all people know I am." He said. James laughed and tapped his helmet.
"Damn straight." The pretty boy said.
I exchanged a glance with Kendall. What? "Um…so, yeah." I said, changing the subject slightly.
"It's like Big Time Homos up in here." Kendall said jokingly. We cracked up while Kelly and Gustavo stared at us.
"How did you not know, dude?" Carlos asked, leaning an elbow on my shoulder.
"Seriously. I'm surprised you didn't know it from the start with James." I said.
The pretty boy looked at me. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"
I smiled. "Nothing at all, James. Nothing. At. All."
Kendall wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's shoulders. "Logie, be nice."
"Over my dead body." I shot back, sticking my tongue out.
"Hey, fuck you, Logan!" James suddenly cried, his anger a joke, but his voice still harsh.
"Oh, you wanna get into this?" I yelled back, going along.
Carlos held me back by my wrists. "Doesn't it mean something when even I vote against violence?" He whined.
I snorted. "I didn't mean anything by it, anyway." I pouted at James. "I'm sorry."
He sniffed and turned his head away.
"Don't you think a hug is in store here?" Kendall asked in an almost sing song voice. I raised an eyebrow at him. James sighed and looked at me. I shrugged. We hugged, then pulled away grinning.
"So, do we start from the top or the bridge?" James asked Gustavo, flipping the packet of lyrics for What We Can Be.
Gustavo and Kelly stared.
The four of us smiled brightly.
Okay! Well, I planned this chapter to be short. But then I got into the details and I just couldn't stop. ;) And HOLY CRAP, I can't type today! What the fuck?
Kendall: You should see a doctor about that.
Logan: I'm here!
Kendall: No. You're busy.
Logan: I am?
Kendall: You are now. *drags him away*
…I'm tired.
Carlos: If I use James as a pillow, you can use me.
Nah, I gots my own pillow. Ish be speshul.
James: You know what else is 'speshul'?
Carlos and I: What?
James: Bella Swan.
Carlos and I: OH SHNAP! *snap*
Okay! Well, good night, good day, good whatever time you're reading this. Rate, review, love, my minions!