Guess what I was playing!
This may not qualify for a Cartoon Crossover, as it's all Spongebob save for a cameo by Danny, but...yeah.
Review replies;
Movie-Brat: Trixie Tang comes to mind. I'll think of some others. Thanks for reading!
Zim'sMostLoyalServant: Wow, I wrote something like H. P. Lovecraft! Awesome! XD Thanks for reviewing.
04/10/10 – You Have Died Of Dysentery
August 1, 1848
You started down the trail with 20 oxen, 12 sets of clothing, 600 bullets, 2 wagon wheels, 2 wagon axles, 2 wagon tongues, 2000 pounds of food, and $560.00.
Spongebob threw the last of the two-hundred pounds of food onto the back of the wagon and climbed on.
"Well, here we go!" he grinned.
"Why do we have twenty oxen?" demanded Squidward.
"So that they don't get lonely, of course!" replied Patrick, brightly.
"…riiight, if nobody minds, I'm going to sleep until we get to Oregon," groaned Squidward.
August 4, 1848
Patrick was bitten by a snake.
"OW!" cried Patrick, rubbing his leg as the snake slithered out of the wagon.
"Patrick!" snapped Squidward, "We're not one hundred miles out of town! How did you get bitten?"
"Am I gonna die?" asked Patrick, shuddering.
Sandy inspected the wound.
"I don't think so," she shrugged, "Looks like it's a scratch."
"Even if it weren't, lad," grinned Mr. Krabs, "Whoever heard of anyone dying of snakebite?"
August 6, 1848
Patrick died of a snakebite.
Mr. Krabs solemnly said a few words he had written on the back of a napkin as Sandy and Squidward buried the large pink starfish.
"We shall always remember Patrick," sighed Mr. Krabs, "Who joined us on our epic quest to Oregon…and died after one-hundred and two miles."
Spongebob sniffled loudly.
"I can't say what would have happened if he had lived," continued Mr. Krabs, "Maybe he would have made the first thousand miles. All I know is that I now owe Squidward twenty bucks, as Patrick did, in fact, die first."
"Mr. Krabs!" gasped Spongebob, horrified.
"What, who'd you think would die first?" asked Mr. Krabs.
"Squidward."
"Hey!" snapped Squidward.
August 10, 1848
You have reached the Big Blue River Crossing. You decided to rest for 2 days.
"Why are we stopping?" demanded Squidward, as the others set up tents, "We're crossing the Rocky Mountains! If we keep stopping like this, we'll be there in the middle of winter!"
"He's got a point," nodded Sandy.
"Ye worry too much, Mr. Squidward!" grinned Mr. Krabs, "There's nothing wrong with crossing the Rockies in winter."
"You mean apart from sub-zero temperatures, icy cliffs of doom and impassable snowdrifts?"
"…yeah, apart from that," snapped Mr. Krabs, "We'll be fine."
August 15, 1848
You've lost the trail.
"Welcome to Nantucket," read Spongebob, reading the wooden sign next to the track.
"We're all gonna die," moaned Squidward.
September 9, 1848
You have reached Fort Laramie. You decided to rest for 7 days.
"Mr. Krabs, I thought I told you…" began Squidward, as Mr. Krabs got out of the wagon.
"Shut up, there's poker here," snapped Mr. Krabs, walking away.
September 23, 1848
Sandy was bitten by a snake. You decided to rest for 5 days.
Sandy nursed her arm.
"It was a Banded Water Snake," she protested, "It's not even poisonous!"
"We're not taking any chances," replied Spongebob, "Not after what happened to Patrick."
"May I remind you that winter is coming?" shot Squidward.
"Mr. Krabs says we'll be fine."
"Mr. Krabs cuddles his money at night," snapped Squidward, "I hardly think we should be listening to him."
There was a brief silence.
"Never mind," sighed Squidward, sitting down at the back of the wagon.
October 3, 1848
Sandy is well again.
October 12, 1848
Squidward has the measles.
"I have a serious illness," croaked Squidward, his skin covered in unsightly spots, "Can we stop?"
"No," snapped Mr. Krabs.
October 15, 1848
You had a wagon tongue break but were able to replace it from supplies.
"See," grinned Mr. Krabs, looking at his handiwork, "You can do anything with enough sticky tape and glue!"
The wheel tongue groaned, and the left wheel fell off. Mr. Krabs gave a sheepish chuckle, and reattached it.
October 20, 1848
Squidward is well again.
"Hey guys, I'm better now," called Squidward.
Mr. Krabs glanced back.
"Wait, you were sick?"
"Yes, I had a serious illness," replied Squidward.
"Oh," nodded Mr. Krabs, "Well, ye should've told us. We'd have stopped."
Squidward gritted his teeth but said nothing.
October 18, 1848
You have reached South Pass. You decided to rest for 3 days.
October 22, 1848
You decided to take the trail to the Green River Crossing.
"You sure you don't want to visit the fort up north, first?" asked Danny, who was in South Pass for no reason.
"Do I look yellow to you," growled Mr. Krabs, "Does this wagon look French?"
He scowled at Danny as the wagon left.
Danny blinked.
"French? But World War II hasn't even happened yet…" he mused.
October 24, 1848
You had a wagon wheel break but were able to replace it from supplies.
October 27, 1848
You had a wagon wheel break but were able to fix it.
"Mr. Krabs, how much did this wagon cost?" asked Squidward.
"Fifty cents," replied Mr. Krabs.
"Yeah, I thought as much."
October 30, 1848
You have reached the Green River Crossing. You chose to caulk your wagon and float it across the river.
"Wow, that was pretty fun!" grinned Spongebob, "Let's do that again at the next river!"
"Sure," nodded Sandy, "What could possibly go wrong…ah, dagnabbit, I tempted fate."
November 8, 1848
Squidward has a fever.
You have reached Soda Springs. You decided to rest for 4 days.
"Hot springs!" cheered Spongebob, jumping into the springs.
"Alright everyone, we're stopping here to relax for a bit," nodded Mr. Krabs, "All of us except you, Squidward, you have stay in the wagon. It's yer fever."
"…but the springs would be good for my health," began Squidward.
"STAY. IN. THE WAGON," growled Mr. Krabs.
Squidward sighed as Mr. Krabs climbed out of the wagon. He averted his eyes as the big crab immediately threw off his top and ran after Spongebob.
November 18, 1848
Squidward is well again.
"No thanks to you," he hissed at Mr. Krabs.
"What?" demanded Mr. Krabs, "Somebody had to guard the wagon!"
Squidward rolled his eyes.
November 26, 1848
You had a wagon axle break but were able to fix it.
Mr. Krabs looked at his handiwork with pride.
"What did I tell ya? Glue and sticky tape!" he beamed.
"Yeah, but when the axle broke, it ripped a hole in the wagon floor," reminded Sandy.
"I'll fix it," nodded Mr. Krabs, "It'll be easy."
November 29, 1848
Mr. Krabs has a broken leg.
Mr. Krabs nursed his leg and glared at the hole.
"I'll try again tomorrow," he gnarled.
November 30, 1848
Mr. Krabs has a broken arm.
Mr. Krabs was now nursing both a broken leg and a broken arm.
"I'll try again tomorrow," he scowled.
December 1, 1848
Squidward has a broken arm.
Mr. Krabs was now nursing a broken leg, a broken arm and Squidward's broken arm.
"I don't know how that happened," he said aloud.
December 5, 1848
Blizzard!
"I TOLD YOU THIS WOULD HAPPEN!" thundered Squidward, as they continued along the mountain trail in blizzard conditions.
Mr. Krabs looked around the freezing wagon, looking for an excuse. He found none.
"Well darn, you were right," he muttered sheepishly.
December 6, 1848
You have reached the Snake River Crossing. You chose to caulk your wagon and float it across the river.
A/N: For some reason, the game decided not to record the fact that it sank at this point.
Sandy pulled herself out of the river, joining the others on the other side.
"Yeah, that's just what I needed," groaned Squidward, "To nearly drown."
"Well, at least we're all in one piece," shrugged Sandy.
They glanced at the river.
"How're we gonna get the wagon out?"
December 15, 1848
Squidward got sick and died.
Squidward stood at the back of the wagon, taking in the mountain air.
"Well, we've made about a thousand miles," he said to himself, "Maybe we're gonna live after-HHUUYYNNNG!"
He clutched his chest and fell out of the wagon.
The wagon stopped, and Spongebob, Mr. Krabs and Sandy got out.
"Wow…I didn't see that coming," mused Mr. Krabs.
"SQUIDWARD!" cried Spongebob, throwing himself on the dead squid's body.
He sobbed for two minutes, before Mr. Krabs picked him up.
"Get a hold of yerself, man!" he yelled, slapping the sponge, "Nobody else is dying on this trip!"
December 27, 1848
Mr. Krabs got sick and died.
Spongebob and Sandy stood over Mr. Krabs' grave, knee deep in snow.
"I just…don't get it," whispered Spongebob, "Maybe this trail is haunted. I mean, you saw all those dysentery graves back there…"
"We're gonna make it, Spongebob," reassured Sandy, putting her hand on Spongebob's shoulder.
December 28, 1848
Heavy fog. Sandy has a fever. You decided to rest for 7 days.
"FISHPASTE!" shouted Spongebob, as Sandy sat in the wagon, coughing.
"Just…just keep going, I'm fine," spluttered Sandy.
"No! We're not going anywhere until you're better!" snapped Spongebob.
January 4, 1849
You decided to rest for 4 days.
January 6, 1849
Sandy is well again.
"Yay! Stopping in the middle of a snowy, freezing mountain range cured your fever!" cheered Spongebob.
"…how?" asked Sandy, confused.
January 11, 1849
Sandy got lost.
A/N: It took about five days to find her.
Spongebob finished looking around the wagon and jumped out, in a cold sweat.
"Oh no!" he gasped in horror, "Sandy has been kidnapped…by BAMBI!"
January 16, 1849
Spongebob and Bambi had an epic fight for Sandy's freedom.
OK, not really.
January 18, 1849
You have reached Grande Ronde in the Blue Mountains. You decided to rest for 7 days.
"Let's just rest here for a week or so," sighed Spongebob, exhausted as he lay on the back of the wagon.
"Yeah, why not?" agreed Sandy.
January 26, 1849
You decided to rest for 7 days.
February 3, 1849
You decided to rest for 7 days.
Spongebob continued to lay in the back of the wagon, unaware that that the snow had melted.
"Let's just rest…"
"Spongebob!" snapped Sandy, "WE! ARE! LEAVING!"
February 22, 1849
Sandy is suffering from exhaustion. You decided to rest for 7 days.
"We've gotta be the slowest pioneers ever," sighed Sandy.
"Yeah," nodded Spongebob.
March 3, 1849
Sandy is well again. You have reached The Dalles. You decided to go rafting.
The raft was very long, having to be big enough to accommodate all twenty oxen and a wagon. Spongebob and Sandy stood at the back, Sandy acting as the steerer.
"Alright, you ready to go?" asked Sandy.
"No," replied Spongebob.
"Here we go!" grinned Sandy.
"I said n-aaaaahhhhhh!" screamed Spongebob, hanging onto the wagon as the raft was washed downstream at high speed.
"YEE-HAW!" cheered Sandy, as they steered past the many sharp rocks.
Sandy was having the time of her life.
Spongebob was consigning himself to his fate.
I dunno what day it is, they don't tell you when you arrive.
The raft washed up at the opposite end of The Dalles in the Willamette Valley. Spongebob was still screaming when they finally docked.
"Well, we made it," grinned Sandy, helping a dizzy Spongebob off the raft.
"We're here," gasped Spongebob, rubbing his eyes, "We're all here…well, except the ones who are dead."
"So," nodded Sandy, "What do we do now?"
There was a short silence.
1849+
INSERT SHIPPING HERE.