If anyone likes this, I'll add a second part to it later in the month.

Review Replies;

Movie-Brat: Got it. I've got an idea of his character, so I should be good for a oneshot within the week. Thanks for reading!

Cartooniac55: Yeah, I was meaning to move that, but I was so tired when I put this up that I wasn't concentrating. Thanks for the review!

unknown20troper: Glad you liked it, but to be honest, I don't think Butch Hartman would really approve of me melting Tad and Chad. XD Thanks for reviewing.

Zim'sMostLoyalServant: The pattern is unintentional, but I like it, so I'll run with it. I had a bit of fun thinking of punishments, maybe I'm evil. X) Thanks very much!

06/10/10 – The Haunted Scam

October the Sixth, 2010.

I was sitting in the review room, staring at a Windows Blue Screen. I was beginning to realise that I should really get a life when the telephone rang.

"Hello?" I answered, picking it up.

"Yeah, hi, I think my house is haunted by demons, is this Ghostbusters?"

"No, this isn't Ghostbusters. You're a number off."

"Ah man. Well, I'd better call them, or I won't be able to pay them two-hundred to remove the problem!"

My eyes widened.

"No, wait!" I replied, hurriedly, "We're far better then Ghostbusters! We're…we're…we're…"

I clicked my fingers.

"E350's Demon Removal Service!" I spluttered.

"Oh, a demon removal service? Awesome, I'll pay you instead. See you tonight!"

I grinned as I hung up.

"Awesome, I scammed someone," I grinned, "Now, I just have to go into the house, sit there until he leaves, then go home again! Easy money!"

I chuckled as I picked up the phone again. I need my 'team' together.

It was a dark and stormy night, just like in every other haunted house story ever. I had shanghaied Danny, Sam, Tucker and Timmy into joining my scam.

"Hmm," I mused, walking to the door, "The bloke doesn't seem to be here. Meh, we'll wait in his living room."

"Doesn't this seem 'off' to you?" asked Danny, pointing to the old, creaking, wooden building.

"Nope," I replied, straightening my tie, "Come on."

We walked in the front door and into a lavish, but dark and cold, lounge room.

"This guy needs to redecorate," mused Sam.

I sat on the couch.

"OK," I announced, "If the guy asks who we are; I'm the leader, Danny's my number two, Sam's our combat strength, Tucker's our intelligence and Timmy is the canary."

"Canary?" questioned Timmy.

"We send you in first, and if you die we know the room is dangerous," replied Tucker.

"Gee, thanks," deadpanned Timmy.

"Now, I'm going to wait for him on his front lawn," I continued, "You guys feel free to raid his fridge if you can find it."

I walked outside, and stood on the front lawn.

"Hey, E3."

I turned, to see Spongebob, Sandy and Bloo heading up the pavement.

"Oh, yes, you're here for your obligatory appearances," I grinned, "Nice to…why's Bloo here?"

"I heard you were trying to scam someone," replied Bloo, innocently, "I thought the police might want to know…"

"What do you want?" I sighed.

"Fifty bucks."

I sighed and pulled out my wallet.

There was a sudden 'bang', and the house shook. The lights flickered and shut off.

"Did they blow the fuse box or something?" I mused.

We walked back inside, to find that three things were out of place.

Thing Number One – there was a blue-haired witch standing in the middle of the room. (I could tell from the generic pointy hat and robe.)

Thing Number Two – Danny, Sam, Tucker and Timmy were gone.

Thing Number Three – There was a small chocolate stain on the floor.

"Who are you?" Spongebob asked, "You look like an alternate witch version of Ember McLain."

"That's because I am an alternate witch version of Ember McLain," replied Witch Ember, irritably.

"Okeydokey," I nodded, brightly, "Are you the owner of this house? We're here to get rid of the demons."

Bloo and Sandy facepalmed.

"There aren't any demons, baby pop," replied Witch Ember, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes, "I just called you here to trap you for eternity."

"Oh my god," I gasped, "You scammed my scam, you magnificent bastard!"

"…but why do you want to trap us?" asked Sandy, "Wouldn't you just want to kill us or steal our souls or something?"

Witch Ember gave a guffaw.

"If I killed you," she replied, "I wouldn't be able to get my revenge."

"Revenge for what?" enquired Spongebob.

Witch Ember thought for a moment.

"…just shut up and let me torture you," she groaned at last.

"Wait, before you do that!" blurted Bloo, "I have one thing to say!"

"Yeah," asked Witch Ember, uninterested.

"…bye."

Bloo raced out the door and into the night.

"My hero," deadpanned Sandy.

"Enough talk," sighed Witch Ember, pulling her keys out of her watch pocket, "Time for some…fun."

She threw the keys to us.

"What, we gonna get pizza?" I asked, confused.

"L…look at the keychains," stammered Spongebob.

I looked. There were four small, die-cast figures attached to keychains…Danny, Sam, Tucker and Timmy.

"Oh my god," I gasped, "It's like that episode of Digimon!"

Spongebob, Sandy and Witch Ember stared at me.

"What? I used to watch that show," I shrugged.

"Goodnight, Mr. E350," snarled Ember, her hand glowing.

"Run!" yelled Sandy.

We ran out the door and into the street, Witch Ember close behind. For about two blocks we were pursued, until we reached my safe haven – the local game shop.

Kicking open the door, we ran into the basement and barricaded it.

"OK, we need a plan," noted Sandy, as the sounds of Witch Ember crashing against the door echoed around us, "Anyone got a weapon?"

"This is a game shop!" I whined, "The only weapons here are digital!"

"Maybe we could dig our way out," mused Spongebob.

"Through concrete walls?" challenged Sandy.

"Oh, yeah."

"Maybe we could use this Energon-Manipulation Ray Gun I was carrying around to turn one of us into a Miniature Transformer to beat Witch Ember," I mused, pulling the titular ray from my pocket.

Sandy stared, mouth agape.

"How long have you had that?" she asked.

"Two weeks," I shrugged, "I'm looking after it for a friend. I've also got his Andelite Morphing Cube and his Particle Beam, why?"

Sandy stared for a few more seconds.

"Did you ever think those might just have helped us?" she spluttered at last.

"Nope," I replied, shrugging.

Sandy punched me in the gut.

"Alright," she growled, "We're taking this witch down."

"Whatever you say…Sandimus Prime," I groaned, attempting to show sarcasm.

I got punched again for that.

Linkara walked out of the 7/11, carrying a bag of sherbet in his hands. He sat on a bench and scooped up some of the sherbet with his spoon, swallowing it.

Across the road, a game shop exploded. A blue haired witch was flung from the site as a human-sized Transformer, looking strangely familiar and bizarrely like a squirrel, followed her out. The witch attempted to run, only to find her way blocked by Spongebob, who turned into an elephant before her eyes. Behind all this, I was firing a Particle Beam indiscriminately, laughing maniacally as I failed to hit anything.

Linkara glanced at his purchase.

"I…don't think this is sherbet," he considered.

To Be Continued?