Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
A.N.: Thank you to alix33, KSBP, HesMines, Mrs. Elizabeth Gibbs, Huddly, Twilight Trekky and MissJayne for reviewing. Also thank you to Huddly for the inspiration for the last part of this chapter. It felt better for it to be a stranger, rather than Gibbs. ;)
Gibbs closed Jenny's front door behind him and walked quickly to his car, just needing to get away from her. He was angry, hurt and a little despondent, all feelings that he felt on a regular basis after an argument with Jenny. Well his plan to get closer to her was backfiring already, and that was not a good sign. Why couldn't they have a civil conversation without it either turning into sexual innuendo or a shouting match? He sighed already knowing the answer. It was because they knew each other, knew which buttons to press to get which response and most importantly, they were both scared.
He didn't know what she was scared of, but his reason was a much better one anyway. She had hurt him deeply when she had walked away from him, and the pain that event had caused him wasn't easy to forget. Since he had regained his memories, Paris had been brought into sharp relief against his other recollections, and he knew she had made him happier than he had been with any other woman except Shannon, but that made the pain that much worse too. He wanted to forget about it, put it behind them and kiss her senseless, but he couldn't help thinking that she would just hurt him again, and he couldn't take the prospect of that. He may be a marine with a tough exterior, but he wasn't masochistic. If anything was going to happen between them, it would have to be her that extended the olive branch.
He wasn't stupid, he knew she wanted him, he had learned the cues of her body and its language a long time ago, he could read her like an addictive romance novel, and that was why she managed to confuse him. When she began to bask in his presence, she also began to pick fights. They did it to each other often enough, but it was a constant thing with Jenny. It was like she was trying to teach her body to attack him when she became hot and bothered by him.
He shook his head and started his car, pulling out of her driveway and setting off to the Navy Yard. He'd talk to Ducky about Jenny later; his old friend could help him put everything into perspective in the way only Ducky can. The trip to work was fast to keep his mind occupied on the road rather than on a certain red head, and how natural it had looked for her to have a child clinging to her.
And I thought you knew everything about me. What did she mean by that? Was there something she was hiding from him? Something to do with her strange obsession with the Arms Dealer Ducky had told him about? Or maybe something to do with parenting… You don't know what experience I have with children! Something was very wrong with those statements, he'd known it the second she had uttered them, but only now did it filter through his mind what it could mean.
Jenny had never had children, her file said so, as did her medical records, but her intimation was clear. He didn't know everything about her or her experiences, which meant she was purposefully keeping something from him, something about herself and children. Gibbs hit the brakes so hard his car skidded along the tarmac for a few moments before coming to a stop and he just stared out of his windscreen with his mouth slightly agape.
Jenny was keeping a child from him? No, that was impossible, he would have heard about it at some point and it would be in her file. There would have been children's stuff in her house and there wasn't. So she wasn't hiding a child, but that was the only thing that fit her behaviour and what she had said to him. Unless she no longer had the child. Gibbs sighed and leaned back in his chair, ignoring the honking horns behind him as his stomach plummeted. He started his car again and drove into the Navy Yard, parked his car and pulled out his phone. It rang on for a while meaning he was busy, but Gibbs tried again regardless. This time it was picked up.
"Hello?"
"Duck, we need to talk."
Ducky waited patiently for Jenny to finish with Emily, and before long he heard her footsteps approaching. He turned towards her as she entered the study and had to fight to keep the sternness from his face. She smiled at him and walked over to her desk, sitting behind it and gesturing for him to sit opposite her. He did, and then decided he had put this talk off for far too long.
"Jennifer, I couldn't help but notice you seem to be drinking more than you usually do." He started off carefully, watching her face for his cues. The smile froze on her face and she leaned back in her chair.
"Excuse me?" she said, her voice even, a subtle undercurrent of aggression lying just beneath the surface.
"I have known you for a long time Jennifer, I know your liking of Bourbon comes from Jethro, and I also know that it has never been a problem for you, until now." he spoke kindly, but he could tell she wasn't hearing the concern, just the accusation of being dependant on alcohol. She didn't move, just stared at him, her eyes narrowing as she spoke back.
"Until now?"
"Yes." He replied firmly. She leaned all the way back in her chair and glared at him, unable to think of anything to say, or just not interested in talking with him about this. He forged ahead anyway, hoping to break through her protective cocoon of hostility. "Drinking first thing in the morning is not good for you, nor is it good for Emily. She needs stability and a calm, focussed minder, not a-"
"Drunk and erratic old woman with no children of her own?" she supplied angrily, cutting him off. He shook his head at her, surprised at her assessment of herself. The lack of children was really getting to her wasn't it? Perhaps he should have left it well enough alone.
"Jennifer you know that isn't what I mean. You have a problem that has been going on for at least a week, maybe more. Just because you have managed to hide it from us doesn't mean it isn't there." He said gently, hoping she would just agree with him, but knowing she wouldn't. She would only acknowledge she had a problem when she was ready to do so.
"I don't have a problem, Ducky." She said, just as he thought she would. Why couldn't she see that he was trying to protect her?
"Then I'm sure you won't mind if I monitor your alcohol intake to prove it, should your superiors ask." He stated. Maybe a firm hand would get her to look at her actions in a different light?
"No I wouldn't." she said through gritted teeth.
"Good." He said, smiling warmly despite the hurt look of betrayal that she was throwing at him. Now was the time to try and mend the bridges he had just harassed. "You are doing a wonderful job with Emily, Jennifer. The difference in her behaviour with me and you is striking and I'm confident that in your care she will get better." Jenny relaxed slightly, a wary smile of contentment appearing on her face at Emily's name. "Agent Fornell wishes to see her soon. Where did you learn to calm her so well?" he asked slyly, his mind already supplying the only possible ways.
"Rosie used to cry all the time, she-" Jenny began but cut off mid sentence, a stricken look of agony and shock on her face. She looked up at him quickly and narrowed her eyes accusingly, then looked away.
"Rosie?" he pressed, but she said no more. "Jennifer, you need to talk about this." He said softly. She shook her head mutely, her eyes filling with tears. "Jennifer…"
"I talked to Ziva about it after she saved my life; I don't need to open up to you too." she said angrily, standing up from behind the desk and rounding it in an attempt to put some more distance between them. Ducky watched her go and then called out to her softly when she was almost out of the study.
"When did Ziva save your life?" he asked curiously. Jenny stopped and answered without turning around.
"In Cairo, years ago." She said softly, remembering that moment when her young partner had become a firm friend for life brought together by a tragedy that no one had been able to foresee.
"Because of Rosie?" he asked softly and Jenny's posture became rigid.
"Thank you for coming over Dr. Mallard, I'm sure you can show yourself out." She threw over her shoulder, and then walked out, back to the kitchen without a backward glance.
Emily looked up from the pancake mix that she had been trying to put in a pan for Noemi when she heard footsteps coming towards the kitchen. She stepped closer to Noemi, afraid until Jenny entered the room and then she smiled brightly, abandoning the mix in favour of being held by Jenny. She ran forwards, holding her arms out in front of her and Jenny lifted her into her arms.
"Hey Emily? Would you like to go see your father today?" Jenny asked softly, and Emily nodded eagerly. It would be wonderful to see her daddy. "Ok then, go get your shoes on." She held Emily's hand and took her upstairs to get their shoes on and then they walked out, to Jenny's seldom driven car, and then towards the hospital. The drive there was quiet, Emily spent her time playing with her hair and staring for signs pointing towards the hospital. When they finally pulled up, Emily was very excited to see her daddy.
Jenny unbuckled both of their seatbelts, exited the car and locked it, then took Emily inside, up to the front desk. It took only a few seconds of conversation with the receptionist to find her father's room and then they were off. Jenny had to pick up her pace to keep up with Emily as she practically sped down the hall, counting the room numbers until they came to 253, her daddy's room. She opened the door before Jenny could reach for the door handle and then threw herself through it, dragging Jenny behind her.
"Daddy!" she shouted happily, and Tobias opened his eyes groggily and searched for the sound that had awoken him. He didn't have to search long, as Emily ran to him and grabbed his hand, trying to use it to pull herself up on the bed with him. Jenny picked her up when she nearly dislodged the drip attached to Tobias, and she smoothed down the blankets when Emily's eager wriggling pulled them off of his feet.
"Emily, angel, where have you been?"
"In Jenny's house. It's big and nice, she's nice." She said, throwing a smile at Jenny over her shoulder. Jenny smiled back and then she retreated out of the room to stand out in the hall, to give them some privacy. Half an hour later was when it happened. Jenny went to the bathroom, and when she came back, a male doctor was approaching the room, looking over a chart in his hands, unaware that Tobias wasn't alone. He opened the door and walked straight in. Jenny rushed over to the room, but the scream that erupted from the room said that she was too late.
Bursting through the door, Jenny saw the strangest, most amazing sight. Emily was screaming and crying, but she wasn't hiding, she was standing in front of her dad's bed, beating her little fists on the stunned doctor's chest, screaming at him to leave her and her daddy alone. She was standing up for herself against a strange man. Jenny leapt forwards regardless, unsure of how the doctor would react to being attacked. She shushed Emily and pulled her into her arms, shooing the doctor out of the room. He left immediately, unsure of what was going on.
Emily sobbed into Jenny's chest, and she stroked the little girl's hair gently. Tobias reached out his arms to her so Jenny lifted Emily and placed her in her father's arms. Fornell caught Jenny's eyes over Emily's head and nodded to her gratefully, and Jenny smiled back. It was a turning point for her, hopefully a good one.