What You Never Knew

Remus Lupin: The Man Who Lost

1. He had a sister.

A twin sister, in fact. Her name was Rowena, because John Lupin was obsessed with the founder of his House. Remus and Rowena were the best of friends, inseparable from the moment they were born.

That is, until Fenrir Greyback showed up. Remus was bitten. But Rowena was gone.

2. For the first six years of his life, he had his own language.

Remus was always an extraordinarily clever child- much like his Ravenclaw father- and, therefore, took delight in creating a language of his very own, leaving his parents to puzzle over what he meant when he said things like "Cho-Cha" (train) and "Lalo"(flower).

Then, he had come face to face with Fenrir Greyback. "Neex!" he had shouted, with no response. "Neex! Neex!" He yelled, panicking, running away from the werewolf and towards his home, looking around for Rowena, unable to find her. Finally, with all the breath he had in him, Greyback closing in on him, he screamed, "HELP!" at the top of his lungs.

His parents came rushing out to their son, but it was already too late. From that point on, Remus never spoke his own language again.

3. He was very nearly a Ravenclaw.

In fact, being Sorted into Gryffindor had been the biggest surprise of his life.

Good afternoon, Mr. Hat. How are you today? Lupin introduced himself politely, wanting to make the best impression possible.

Much better, thank you, now that one of you rascals has decided to show me some well deserved manners.

My parents told me to be on my best behavior at Hogwarts, starting now.

Yes, Yes, that sounds like something John Lupin and Eleanor Adderby would say. I Sorted both of them, you know. They were both Ravenclaws, I remember, even though I honestly would have never pictured them as a couple… Anyways, you're quite like both of them. Brainy; studious; clever; really, you're the epitome of a Ravenclaw. But…

But what?

There's something else in you, something more prominent in your personality than your intelligence: bravery.

M-Me? Brave? I'm not brave!

Au contraire, Remus Lupin. You have been a werewolf for five years now- dealing with that in itself takes bravery. What takes even more courage than that is dealing with the unfair prejudice towards werewolves. Yes, you are very brave, Mr. Lupin. Perhaps one of the bravest individuals I have ever had the honor to Sort.

Really? Wow… thank you, Mr. Hat!

You're more than welcome. I hope you have fun in "GRYFFINDOR!"

4. At first, he hated Sirius.

He had every right to, as the first thing Sirius had said to him was, while eyeing Remus' scars in mild revulsion, "Whoa… what happened to your face?" Then, Remus had gotten to know Sirius, and learned that that was just the type of person he was: blunt and upfront. And so, the two had apologized, shaken hands, and been best friends ever since.

Of course, it did help when Sirius hexed Snape for Remus.

5. The scariest moment of his life was when his friends discovered he was a werewolf.

It was in his Second Year, and, in a panic, he had run into an area that was more familiar to him than it should be: the Forbidden Forest.

He had run and run until he could run no more, and he stopped, panting slightly, sitting down on a nearby rock. Remus put his hands in his hands and, for the first time, let tears drip down his face. It was all over. The friendships he had worked so hard to build; the companionship he had always longed for; everything was gone. And it was all his fault.

Suddenly, he heard a familiar voice call out, "Reeeemuuuus! We know you're in here!" Remus frowned, but kept silent. What was James doing in the Forest?

"C'mon, Remus! Where are you?" Remus heard Sirius yelled, and he suddenly realized that they were looking for him… but why would they be looking for him.

"Remus! Come out, Remus!" Peter shouted, his voice painfully high pitched and very close. Remus was about to run farther into the Forest when his shorter friend made his way through the bushes and beamed at Remus. "Remus! Guys, I've found him!" No longer than two seconds later, James and Sirius had joined their friends.

"We found you!" James exclaimed ecstatically, enveloping Remus into a huge hug. "We were worried about you!"

"James, you sound like such a girl," Sirius laughed. "We were worried about you, though, Remus. Why'd you run off like that?"

Remus stared at the boys like they were all off their rockers. "I- I thought- you found out my secret," Remus spluttered. "And I- well, you see- I thought you lot wouldn't want to be friends with me anymore."

"Are you crazy, Remus?" Peter gaped. "You're only a werewolf once a month!"

"The rest of the time, you're the book-obsessed Remus Lupin that we all know and love. Platonically, of course," Sirius grinned.

"I couldn't agree more! Did you really think that we're going to let your furry little problem get in the way of our friendship?" James asked.

Remus beamed at his friends. "Thanks, mates. I'm sorry I ran off… I just freaked out."

"No big deal. We found you, so all's good," Sirius assured him. "By the way, we have an announcement to make: We've decided that we're going to become Animagi, to help you with your transformations!"

Remus' jaw dropped, and he arched his eyebrows. "Now it's you guys who are crazy."

6. His first love was Mary Macdonald.

They dated all throughout their Seventh Year- a relationship that was greatly approved by all of their friends. The two bookworms were the perfect match- both were slightly shy, loved to read, and cared more about their friends than anything in the world. Remus fully intended to marry Mary one day.

The ring was in his pocket the day that Mulciber killed her.

7. Even when Remus thought that Sirius betrayed the Potters, he never hated him.

Despite all of the evidence that proved that Sirius was a dirty, filthy traitor, Remus couldn't hate him. He hated what Sirius had done, of course, and tried with all his might to hate Sirius himself. But he couldn't. He would always end up remembering the full moons Sirius spent with him, the times Sirius had made him laugh when he was in his most melancholy moods, the firewhiskey they had illegally drunk down in The Three Broomsticks after curfew. And then, Remus found that he really couldn't hate his old friend, no matter how hard he tried.

8. He hated himself for falling in love with Nymphadora Tonks.

She was young, bright, cheerful, optimistic, beautiful, and so much more. He couldn't help falling in love with her. But she deserved better than him- a poor, unemployed werewolf who was thirteen years her senior. And so, he decided to go by the saying, "If you love someone, you have to let them go", and withdraw from Tonks, for her own good.

Only when they had left the Hospital Wing, allowing the Weasleys some alone time to look after Bill, and Tonks had abruptly thrown herself at him and give him the best bloody kiss of his life- it just felt so right- did he realize that sometimes, if you loved someone, you have to let them stay.

9. He received the biggest shock of his life when he went to join Greyback's werewolf clan on Dumbledore's orders.

One minute, he had been walking around, looking at the brutish werewolves with utter, undisguised revulsion; the next, he was standing perfectly still, shock consuming each of his features one by one, as he looked down at one of the werewolves, sitting apart from the rest.

This werewolf was a female- that much was clear. She wore a tattered brown dress that looked to be cut from a thin sack. Her light brown hair was thin, flecked with grey, and an utter mess; her face was almost black from dirt, as was the rest of her skin; scars covered every inch of her body, which was bone thin. But her eyes were alert and sparkling, filled with life, not malice, the exact same shade of blue as Remus' eyes.

Remus knelt down in front of the woman. She heard him and looked up abruptly, her eyes roving over his neat clothes before staring straight into his eyes.

"R-Rowena?" He asked tentatively, his voice hoarse from shock. "Rowena Lupin?"

The woman cocked her head to the side, as if thinking hard. "Rowena… Rowena Lupin…" she breathed, her voice soft and slight cracked. "That name… it's familiar. I remember it, from a long time ago… but why do I remember that name?"

"It's your name," Remus told her gently, squeezing her dirty hand tenderly. "You remember that name because you're Rowena Lupin."

Rowena withdrew her hand abruptly. "How do you know that?" she asked suspiciously. "I've never seen you before in my life!"

"Yes, you have," Remus said, fighting back tears. Could she really not remember? Sure, it had been thirty years, but still… "Look at me, Rowena. Who do I look like?"

Frowning, her head cocked to the side, Rowena surveyed every detail of Remus' face. "I don't know," she answered finally. "Who do you look like?"

Remus sighed. "Have you ever seen a mirror?" Rowena shook her head, and Remus pulled a hand mirror out of his jacket and held it in front of her face. "This is you, Rowena," he said, pointing to the reflection of the mystified woman. Then he pointed to himself. "And this is me. Now do you know who I look like?"

She blinked once. Then twice, as if absorbing everything she had just learned before she croaked out, "Me. You look like… me."

Remus nodded, unable to stop a tear from trickling down his cheek. "I'm Remus, Rowena. Remus Lupin. Your twin brother."

Rowena stared at him in shock, before she gasped. "R-Remmy?" He nodded, smiling at the use of his old nickname, and his sister gasped again before pulling him into a surprisingly strong hug. "Remmy! Oh, Remmy, you came back for me! You came back for me!"

A few tears wetted the sack that Rowena called clothing. "I missed you, Rowena," Remus sniffed, squeezing his sister back.

10. He made Harry Teddy's godfather for James' sake.

Remus loved Harry as Harry, of course; but if not for a long ago conversation with James and Sirius, Andromeda would have been dubbed the guardian of his only son.

"Mates," James began, sitting on his bed in the Seventh Year boys' dormitory, "what should I name me and Lily's future child?"

"You and Lily got together a week ago!" Remus pointed out, laughing. "How are you already thinking about baby names?"

"Lily's The One for me. I know she is," James stated matter-of-factly. "I'm going to marry her someday, and we'll eventually have a child. It's never too early to start thinking of names, is it?"

"Well, I personally think it's too early to start naming the poor kid, but I call being godfather!" Sirius exclaimed, sitting up excitedly.

James turned to Remus and nodded his head towards Sirius as he said, "Should I trust him with the care of my future child?"

"Remember what he did with your goldfish over the summer?" Remus asked.

"Hey! I'm a pureblood! It's not my fault that I didn't know that goldfish needed to be kept in a bowl of water!" Sirius defended himself.

"One, Padfoot, I'm a pureblood, so that no excuse," James said. "Two, everyone knows that fish need water to survive. Even you."

"Fine, fine, so I was stupid!" Sirius admitted. "But I'm good with little kids! Remember Dora, my cousin Andromeda's daughter? She may have liked Remus better, but I was the one who really took care of her and all that jazz! I didn't mess one thing up!"

"You were great with her," Remus spoke thoughtfully.

"True," James conceded. "Okay, Padfoot, you can be the godfather of my future child. While we're talking about godparents amongst ourselves, though, I call being the godfather of Remus' kid!"

"What?!" Remus looked up with alarm. "Why's that?"

"We can all be the godfathers of each others' kids! Sirius will be my kid's godfather, I'll be your kid's godfather, and you'll be Sirius' kid's godfather! Isn't that cool?" James beamed enthusiastically, extremely proud of his idea.

"Actually, that makes sense. And Remus is the most responsible one of us; I'd trust him with my kid…" Sirius mused, before grinning broadly. "I'm in!" He and James turned to Remus expectantly.

"But what about Peter?" Remus inquired, his marginally shorter friend coming to mind.

"Think about it, Remus- what are the chances of him having a kid anyways?" Sirius asked. "No offense to him, of course; he's just not the greatest with the ladies."

"Point taken," Remus sighed. "Oh, I guess I'm in, too."

Harry was the closest Remus had to James. And so, it only made sense that Harry became the godfather. For James.

Remus Lupin was a Man Who Lost, however melancholy that title may be. Thanks to Fenrir Greyback, he lost his sister and what should have been a happy, carefree, normal childhood. Thanks to Mulciber, he lost his first love. Thanks to Peter Pettigrew, one of his best friends, he lost his other best friends. Thanks to Dolohov, he lost his sister, and then himself as he fought to avenge her. He lost any chance he may have had of knowing his wonderful newborn son when he died.

But up in Heaven, with his wife on one his side, Rowena on the other, looking down at his sweet Teddy, he knew that he had died for all the right reasons, and that he hadn't really lost them at all. He knew that he lived on in their hearts, and they lived on in his. And that was all that mattered.

I am soooooooooooooooo sorry for not updating in so long! I haven't been able to think of anything good. *Gets hit in the face with a rotten tomato.* Yeah, I deserved that. I know. You guys are so awesome for waiting so long; I promise, I'll try my best to update quicker in the future!

Thanks for reading! Please review!

-Joelle8