Chapter 4: JPOV

I awoke not knowing what had happened. I looked around the room and that was when I saw her, my creator. I wasn't sure then what had happened and when I tried to remember things it seemed like a flood of memories hit me. However as I sat there seeing images of a brown haired girl with chocolate brown eyes I couldn't remember her name. I waited as the images kept coming, of us holding hands walking around the river, when I was in her room and the feeling that we were one, I remember being nervous as I asked this beautiful woman to marry me and being scared when she took a moment to answer afraid she would say no, but that wasn't the case and she had accepted and I put that ring on her finger. The problem was I couldn't remember her name and I knew looking at the female in the corner she wasn't her. I slowly realized that this woman had taken me from the love of my life and I couldn't remember her at all. I could feel the love I felt for her but that was it.

The woman in the corner stood from the chair she had been sitting on and made her way to where I was now sitting up. The memories slowly faded and I knew I had to whatever it took to remember more often. I had to find this female that had my heart. "Jasper my pet, do you know where you are?" That voice I knew I remembered that voice before, but as I looked up at her there was nothing that I could remember. She was beautiful and her smile would light up a room, but when I got to her eyes I froze. They were blood red and they looked like they could kill anything and anyone who stood in her way. As I sat there trying to figure out where I was I noticed that I could feel love, lust, and most of all fear coming from this woman. "I don't know where I am and who you are." My voice was not something I could recognize, what happened to the love and joy that it was showed when I spoke. Now it sounded like anger and hatred. The woman stood there and I knew that she was more than upset that I didn't remember me and that was when it hit me. I knew this voice because during the time that I felt like I was dying she was talking to me, but I couldn't remember what she was saying. Then more memories came back of a big farm house over looking a river and I remember seeing the name of Whitlock on the mailbox. This was my home and I needed to get back there. I felt a burning in my throat and noticed this was way more important than running home.

"Why does my throat feel on fire?" I asked more to myself in a small whisper but she had heard and she laughed. "You need to feed baby, listen to me for a little while and then I will take you to feed." The only thing I could was sit there and nod my head because at the moment the burning was increasing. It was almost like she knew this because she started talking and fast, at first I didn't think I would be able to keep up with her but as she continued talking I realized I understood every word that came out of her mouth and it was crazy. "When you were walking back to you house you decided to stop and help a woman in need. You didn't realize it at the time, but that woman in need, needed your blood and wanted it. So I convenience you walk a little with me up the hill and it was there that I took a hold of you and ran. I ran until we were here in this small town away from people who knew you. You were so eager to help that you didn't even know what was happening to you. I kissed you and you kissed back and that was when I went in for the kill. I bit you and I only stopped long enough to make sure that I left enough blood in you to charge you. You my pet, are my love save and you will walk this earth for the rest of eternity by my side and be everything I want you to be. You will no longer feel the need for human food, but you will feel the need for their blood. You will no longer walk the sunlight as you skin will shine and people will want to kill you. You will no longer be allowed to live in your small little town as people will soon know you are dead."

I looked at her in shock as the last words came out of her mouth. I knew then and there that I was in trouble and that no one would be able to help me. As I replayed her words in my head I knew she was telling the truth. I could feel it from her telling me that if I didn't listen she would love nothing more than to rip me limb from limb and burn my body. When the words stopped replaying in my head there were a couple of questions I had for her. As I looked at her I knew that none of them would be answered. She didn't care about the woman that I could see in my mind looking at me loving; she didn't care about the fact that my life was not hers. She made it perfectly clear that I would be hers no matter what the cost was and I would like it or it would kill me. I smiled at her not sure what I wanted to ask her because I knew she wouldn't answer most of my questions and that was when it hit me. "What have you done to me? You say I will no longer need human food to survive and how is that possible? Why would I need human blood instead?" As I said these words I had already started to realize what was going on. The burning in my throat craved for blood and not just any blood but the blood of a human. She smiled at me and said in her sweetest voice "You my pet are just like me and you are a vampire. So let's go and get you some blood to help with that burning. So that we can come back her and focus on other things." With that said she got up off the bed and started walking to the door. When she didn't hear me get off the bed she looked at me and I could feel her confusion, "are you not coming?"

I ran at the door at super speed and heard here in the background somewhere saying that I shouldn't be allowed to leave her. I ran and ran and ran until a beautiful scent hit my nose. It was so intoxicating that I didn't know what was happening to my body, it was almost like it had a mind of its own. I felt my feet getting closer to the smell and when I stopped fighting it, I could hear a heart beat. The heart beat was more than enough for me to starting running toward the smell and that beautiful sound. My eyes finally landed on and beautiful female standing there looking for someone. Her hair was red and fire and her blue eyes could melt anyone, but I didn't care about that right now I wanted to drain her of the blood that ran in her veins. I took one step and that was all it took. I had my teeth in the red haired woman's neck before she knew what hit her. I drained the blood from her body, but it wasn't enough the burn was still there, not as bad but still there. I stood up letting my new senses take a hold of me and I noticed that there were others around the area. I let the hunter in me control my movement and in minutes the whole field had been drained and I no longer felt the need to feed. As I looked at the scene in front of me I felt sorrow and sadness for what I had just done. I had taken ten lives and I knew there was no turning back at this point.

I felt stronger and now more than ever I realized that I could feel emotions around me. As I sat there thinking back to when I was feeding I noticed that all of them felt fear. They knew that I was going to kill them and not one of them tried to run. I was trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together in my head when something came to mind. I had used a power that I didn't know anything about and I needed to know more about it. I heard noises and knew at that moment I wasn't going to run until I knew what this power was. I stood there and waited as a female emerged through the corn and she didn't like what she saw. She stated screaming and I looked at her and I felt power seeping through my body. She stopped and I smiled I decided I would see how much I could push this new power and spoke. "You don't see any bodies lying around; in fact the only thing you see is me. Do you understand?" Her voice was low and I didn't think I heard her at first but there she was telling me that she understood what I was saying and I knew she was telling the truth. "You need to turn around and go back home. You will speak to no one about what you have seen and you will remember nothing about it. You will live your life to the fullest and you will forget the events that have happened today. Now go." With the last word out of my mouth the little girl turned on her heal and walked back to her house.

I stood there looking at the bodies that had just been my meal. They didn't even know what was coming in for the kill. It was then that memories started following in my mind. I was seeing myself working on a farm and finding dead animals, burning their bodies and then barring them. It was almost like I was giving them back to the earth. I didn't understand why I wasn't remembering much of my life but I knew whatever I did remember I needed to hold on tight to. I looked around and noticed a shovel leading up against a wheel barrel. What had these kids been doing out here? I noticed the ground was moved and that is when I realized they were getting ready to plant my corn. I quickly pulled the bodies into the wheel barrel and walked to the woods behind me, grabbing the shovel I started to dig a little. I needed to burn the bodies and then make them one with the earth. But I didn't know how I was going to start the fire; I reached in my pocket and pulled out lighter. That was strange I didn't remember anything being in my pocket and I wasn't sure what else I would find. However now wasn't the time, I needed to finish what I had started. I lit the bodies on fire and as the flesh was burning and I knew no one would be able to recognize them I started putting the dirt back over the bodies.

I walked back towards the only house I knew to where my creator was. I wanted answers and she was going to give them to me. I knew I was strong and I now knew that I could read her emotions, so I would know when she was lying to me. I wanted to know where I had come from and where she had found me I wanted to know why I felt so strong to a woman in my mind but I didn't know her name. I wanted to know why she choose to change me into a monster instead of draining my body dry. As I walked I started going through my pockets. It was there that I found a picture of the beautiful woman I had seen in my memories. The picture did nothing to what my memories held of her, the black and white picture was nothing more than black and white. I flipped the picture over and I saw the writing on the back. To my beloved Jasper. You are my reason for living and my reason to be. I love you and I can't wait for us to be married and start our life together. Love Always and forever, Bella.So her name was Bella, and we were supposed to be married. But I didn't wake up with any ring on my finger and no memories were coming back to me saying that we got married. Why can't I remember anything? It seems that I only get bits and pieces of my memory and I didn't like it. I will ask that woman why that is.

As I reached the house I noticed that she hadn't moved and she had a big smile on her face when she saw me. I could feel the happiness she was holding on her face and knew that she was putty in my hands. "I knew you would come back." She said with a bigger smile on her face. I smiled back and this time I knew what was going to happen, however when I spoke I didn't even realized I was saying anything. All I knew is that I wanted answers and she was going to give them to me. "You want me to stay with you from here on out right?" I asked and she shock her head yes. "Well then I will stay but only if you answer a few questions for me first, if not I will leave and never turn back." I didn't recognize the person saying these things. How could I be so cruel to someone I didn't even know? But I wasn't me after all, I had been changed and here I was the new Jasper.

"What is your name?" "Marie." "When did you find me?" "Forks, Washington." "Why didn't you kill me instead of making me a monster?" "So that is what you see yourself as now. Oh no Jasper, you are no monster. You are going to be great and do great things. We will rule this world together." "You didn't answer my question, why didn't you drain the blood from my body?" "Because I knew you were going to be a great asset to me and I knew that I needed you as much as you needed me." At the last part I laughed and I couldn't stop myself. I now knew where I had lived before she changed me and knew that I would be going back and very soon. I needed to know what happened to my Bella and make sure she was ok. "I didn't need you; I had a love and someone who loved me." Saying this I thought I was telling her the truth, from what I could remember at least the female loved me and was ready to spend the rest of her life with me, it had even said so on the back of that picture she had given me.

"I want you to understand one thing right now. I am not yours, you may have created me but I will never love you." As I said this I willed her with my power to know the words I spoke were the truth. That is when I started to wonder if the power that I had used earlier on the humans would work on her. I was going to try this the minute she finished answering my questions. She looked at me like she wanted to kill me and tell me where I could go. Was she really telling me to go to hell, because that was where I was right now without the woman I loved? I felt her anger at my words and felt the need she was sending me to understand that her way was better. I wouldn't give into her not now and not ever.

"Jasper you can never go home again. You have already been shown as died; if you walked the streets of your home town then you will let people know of our secret. You can not let people know what we are. Besides the human you are talking about will never love you know. She will forget that you existed and you will walk this world alone if you don't stay with me. I know that you don't believe and if you want I will take you there now and you can see for yourself." She said it and I felt that she believed it all to be true. But from what I could remember there was no way that woman would forget me this was a dirty trick she was playing on me. "Why is it I only have some of my memories? Why is it that some things come to mind but other just sit in the back and stay unnoticed like they don't exist at all? And most importantly why would I believe you?" She looked at me now like she wanted to sob and I knew nothing would fall from those eyes of hers. I knew that she was just trying to trick me. I felt her pain but I also felt the trick laying out in front of her. "You will not remember much from your human life unless you while you were being transformed into this hunter you remembered things. If you relived every image from your human life that is the only reason you will remember them now. Stop trying to make them come to the surface just forget about your human life. You will never have her and you will be with me." With that said I was done and I ran to her quicker than she thought I was and took her by surprise. I was about to rip her head off when I decided that I would let her live her eternity by herself knowing that I had gotten away and that I didn't love her, when it was more than clear that she loved me.

I ran out of the door and headed towards Forks. I had to find my Bella