Fact 1: Harry Potter is owned by JK Rowling.
Fact 2: I am not her.
Conclusion: It isn't mine.
AN: This chapter is a little shorter than the last ones have been... but I still think you will like it, at least I hope so :)
"Its just after 6. We could still get down to supper... wouldn't be too late."
"Not really hungry." I said, shaking my head.
Draco had decided that my leg was okay, just bruised, and that a trip to the hospital wing wouldn't be necessary. We were sitting in the floor, me leaning against the wall, legs stretched out to the sofa, him facing me, his legs bent slightly, too long to stretch out completely. We hadn't said a whole lot, and I knew it was my fault. I wasn't being very good company. My mind was still running in circles.
More than once I wondered why he didn't leave, but he just sat there, pulling at a loose thread in his jeans.
"So, have you talked to Scar Head and Tag-along yet?" He asked, grinning at me.
I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help but smile. The way I was feeling towards them, he could call them whatever he wanted.
"Nope. They sent Ginny in as their spokesperson." I said. I knew he would have something to say about that.
"Ha!" He snorted, "They sent Weaslette in to do their bidding for them? I guess I shouldn't be surprised..." He said, shaking his head.
I smiled at him, glad that I at least knew him well enough to predict his response to something... no matter how small.
"I'm sorry Hermione" He said, his voice now sounding very sincere.
"Sorry?" I asked, confused. What had he done?
"I feel like this is all my fault. You have been dragged into my world, and now its messing everything up for you. You are scared out of your mind all the time, can't sleep... you hardly eat. And now you don't even have any friends."
I was about to tell him that it wasn't his fault... that he wasn't responsible for what his dad did, but when he said the last part I forgot what I was going to say. I swallowed hard, and told myself not to cry.
"Hermione?" He asked, slowly, trying to catch my eye.
I looked up from the floor, and raised an eyebrow at him.
"What did I say? I didn't mean to upset you, I just..." He trailed off without finished the sentence.
This was normally something I would lie about, but my mind wasn't even coherent enough to form a lie, so I was left with nothing but the truth.
"You said... but, I thought... I thought you were my friend." I said, quietly, looking back down at the floor. I realized, somewhere in the back of my mind, that I should have been embarrassed for saying that, but I couldn't be. I felt oddly numb. I had really thought that we were friends now. The little bit of doubt I had before had mostly been erased when he showed up today... and completely erased when we had actually had fun. But now... now he was saying I didn't have any friends, so clearly I had been wrong.
I didn't realize Draco had moved until I felt his hand underneath my chin, lifting my face up until my eyes were level with his.
"Of course I am your friend." He said, sincerely. "I didn't think before I said that, I just know how hard it must be for you to lose all of your old friends. I know I'm a pretty inadequate replacement, but I am your friend and I will be for as long as you want me."
His hand was still on my face, holding it up gently, as he looked at me waiting on a response. His dark grey eyes were staring straight into my own, so intensely that I almost wanted to look away, but I couldn't. I was completely and entirely transfixed.
"Hermione?" He said softly as his thumb moving lightly, back and forth along my jaw.
I nodded slightly to show that I was listening.
"Hermione, I want to try something." He said, very carefully, his eyes never moving from mine.
I nodded again, and just as I was about to open my mouth to ask what he wanted, his lips were on mine. The last coherent thought I formed was how his lips molded perfectly against mine... and then my mind stopped working completely. He kissed me for just a moment before pulling away and looking at me carefully, his hand still cupping my chin.
He started to move backward, away from me, probably because of the shocked expression on my face, but I didn't want him to move... I couldn't let him. Just as he brought his hand away from my face, I took it in my hand and pulled us closer together. I brought my hand up and ran one finger down his face- from his cheekbone to his jaw. I hooked my thumb under his chin and softly ran my finger across his bottom lip. His mouth part slightly in reaction to this, and I looked up to find his eyes looking back at me - warm and inviting.
Once again, his lips captured mine, and this time, I didn't even try to think. I simply let him kiss me.
His lips were so soft and warm against mine, moving slowly and carefully at first, and then becoming more firm. His left hand was around my waist, holding me close to him, and his right hand was in my hair, moving lightly along the base of my neck.
He started teasing my lips with his, pulling at them lightly. Then he ran his tongue across my bottom lip, and tingles ran along my spine, down my arms and legs... across my whole body. I parted my mouth for him, granting him the access he was looking for and threw both my arms around his neck in an effort to keep myself grounded, balanced. He kissed me deeply, his tongue plunging into my mouth, dancing with my own, and I kiss him back greedily, suddenly feeling like I couldn't get enough of him.
I felt his hand move from my hair to my back and then I was leaning backward, and onto the floor. I pulled away from him slightly, just long enough to give myself a chance to breathe, but his lips never left my skin. He left a trail of soft, warm kisses along the line of my jaw, down one side and back again, until I caught his mouth with my own. I kissed him with more force this time, and he responded with just as much urgency. Suddenly, it was as if we didn't have enough hands. Mine were on his chest, in his hair, brushing lightly across his lower back, underneath the waste band of his jeans, and I could feel his all over me. No sooner did my mind register "hand, on hip" than it had moved and was making tiny little circles along the small of my back.
I could stay like this forever. Lying in the floor, cramped between the sofa and the wall, kissing Draco Malfoy. Surely kissing wasn't always this fun? I couldn't remember anymore. This was the only kissing that existed- his tongue swirling around my mouth, his lips crushed against mine, his hands against my skin, our hearts pounding in our chests- nothing mattered but this.
He was the one to pull away this time, his breath coming as ragged as my own. He paused for a second and looked at me- his deep grey eyes boring into mine. His face was no more than a couple of inches, but he wasn't close enough. He reached his hand out, cupping my cheek, and I leaned into his touch, welcoming the warmth that came with it.
"Hermione, I... " He said quietly, his voice barely a whisper, but before he could continue, I stopped him with my mouth.
I brought my lips to his, lightly and softly, and he didn't try to stop me. He pulled my lower lip into his mouth and sucked on it lightly. I groaned into his mouth involuntarily, and I felt his hands tightened on my face and waist. Instinctively I knew that I should stop him... that if I didn't do it now, I never would, but I couldn't make myself pull away from him.
I didn't have to make that choice, because he seemed to be reading my thoughts, and pulled away from me instead. I inhaled sharply, and closed my eyes, trying to clear my thoughts. It wasn't easy. My skin still burned, my stomach was still knotted, my lips still tingled, and he was still far too close for my mind to function correctly.
"We should stop." He said firmly, and I wondered if he was saying it for my benefit, or for his own.
I nodded slightly, and lifted myself up, leaning against the wall, giving myself some distance from him. This simple action took more effort than I could have ever imagined, like we were magnets with our polarity perfectly matched- pulling my body away from his took more willpower than I knew I had.
Draco leaned up against the couch, and ran his fingers through his tousled hair. When our breathing returned to normal, he looked at me again expectantly. Should I say something? I wondered, probably... but what?
"So, that was... " I finally said, not entirely sure what I was going to say
"Yeah," He said, nodding at me "it was."
We sat there for a moment, stealing glances at each other and taking turns staring at the floor and ceiling. One of us was going to have to say something, but neither was volunteering. Suddenly, I felt embarrassed. Sure, he had kissed me first, but did I have to get carried away like that? Now he probably thought I was some common tramp. If nothing else, I needed to explain to him that that was certainly not the case. But how could I do that without telling him how I really felt about him? If I told him I didn't normally do stuff like that, wouldn't he want to know what made me do it now? And then... then I would have to tell him the truth. I would have to tell him that I can't get my mind off of him, that now when I can't fall asleep its because I miss him- not because I'm scared, that I miss him all the time, even when he is sitting right beside me, because close is never close enough. I would have to tell him that I like him, and care about him far more than he realizes... and I didn't know if I was ready for that.
Now or never, Granger, I told myself, You may never get another chance. Is that a regret you are willing to live with? Never telling him how you feel?
I knew, without really thinking about it that, no, I couldn't live that particular regret, no matter what happened.
"Draco, I need to say something to you." I said, quietly, but still as firmly as I could manage.
He looked up at me, and nodded, but he looked hesitant... worried almost.
"I don't normally do stuff like that, I don't know what came over me." I paused, and shook my head. "That's not true, I know exactly what came over me, and that's what I need to talk to you about."
"I know, it's all my fault, and I'm sorry--" he started, but I stopped him.
"No, please. Don't blame yourself, and please don't be sorry. I don't think I could handle it if you were sorry... just let me finish, okay? Then you can say whatever you want." I said, pleading, hoping desperately that the only reason he was saying he was sorry was because he thought I was upset with him. At least, that's what I was going to tell myself until he told me otherwise.
"I haven't been completely honest with you. I haven't lied, but I still haven't been entirely truthful. We agreed to be friends, and at first that made me really happy. You were right earlier, this has all be really hard on me- and losing my friends, if that does happen, will be one of the hardest things I've ever been through. But, despite all that, through all of that, you have helped me and been there for me. You've been the one bright spot in this mess, and knowing that you wanted, or needed me as a friend too made me so happy. But then, earlier today, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I tried... I tried thinking about anything else, but everything reminded me of you. And that's why I asked you to come here. It didn't seem like anything else would make me feel better, so even though I didn't think you would come... it was a chance I had to take." I took a deep breath, and continued "But then, I still missed you. Even with you sitting right here beside me... I realized that I felt homesick, but it wasn't home I wanted. It was you."
I looked up at him, trying to gauge his reaction. He looked confused, but his features were soft, urging me to go on.
"I know that doesn't make any sense. It doesn't make sense to me, but every time you touched me, every time you were close to me, I felt like my skin alive. And then when you kissed me, it all made sense. That's what I had been missing, that feeling, even though I never knew it existed." I shrugged slightly, and looked away from him, afraid of what he was about to say- or do.
I looked across the room, out the large window at the dark sky... the large moon in the distance, the thousands of stars. It was hard to believe that we had been here together all day. Were people looking for me? Were people looking for him? Had anyone noticed that we were both missing? Did I care if they did..? Not really.
I looked back at him just in time to see him open his mouth to speak.
"You're better at this than I am, you know?" He said, smirking at me slightly.
My brows furrowed together, and I looked at him questioningly, what was he talking about?
"You figured it out before I did... I didn't realize what was going on until it happened, and even then, my mind was reeling way too fast for me to keep up. It took you explaining it to me, but I get it now, Granger." He looked at me through the strands of blonde hair that had fallen in his face.
"I think I'm confused." I said, slowly.
"Confused? Oh, everything else you get... but me saying I feel the same way, that confuses you?" He asked, laughing softly to himself, shaking his head.
Once I understood what he had just said, I thought I would burst. He felt the same way? A huge grin broke out across my face, and he grinned back at me.
Without thinking, I threw myself at him, hurling myself into his arms, burying my face in his chest and flinging my arms around his neck.
"What's this for?" He asked, wrapping his arms tightly around me, laughing.
"Nothing." I said against his chest.
"Nothing, huh?" He asked, teasingly, tickling my ribs as he spoke, "Then why do I get the idea that you are happy about something?"
I giggled, and wriggled in his arms, trying to get away from the hands that were tickling me, but he held me firmly against him.
"Nope. You aren't going anywhere... now that I've got you, this is where you will stay."
He had stopped tickling me, so I fell back against him, perfectly content to stay.
"You can't be very comfortable, though" He said, after a minute.
"I'm very comfortable" I said, stubbornly, not wanting to move, even though my knees were starting to hurt from me sitting on them.
He chuckled, and lifted me off of him, standing up and reaching his hand out to me. I pouted up at him, and folded my arms across my chest.
"I'm not getting rid of you, Granger, just moving us somewhere more comfortable." He said, reaching his hand out again. This time I took it, and allowed him to pull me to the front of the leather sofa.
He laid down, his back against the back of the sofa, facing me. He stretched his arms out and motioned for me to join him, so I laid down, my back against him, his arms circled around my waist.
We stayed like that for a few minutes before either of us said anything.
"Granger?" He said, tapping me on the shoulder.
"Yes?" I said, trying not to laugh.
"I don't like this." He whined.
"Don't like what? Do you want me to move?" I asked, and crossed my fingers on both hands, praying that he wouldn't say yes.
"Yes."
My heart sank, but I shifted my weight so that I could sit up more easily. Before I got far, and tightened his grip on me.
"I don't want you to get up. I just want you to turn around. I'm tired of looking at the back of your head." He said simply, and I couldn't help but laugh.
I turned myself around so that I was facing him, and the closeness of his face startled me. He looked so prefect, even this close up. His eyes were the most perfect color of grey, almost silver when the light hit them just right. His features were so smooth, so perfectly straight. I closed my eyes tightly and tried to imprint the image of his face in my mind, incase someday it was all I had.
My thoughts surprised me, and I shuddered involuntarily. Draco tightened his arms around me, pulling me closer against his chest.
"Are you cold?" He asked, his mouth right against my ear.
I shook my head, and lifted my face up to kiss him on the jaw.
"What are we doing, Draco?" I asked, before I even thought about what I was saying. I hoped he didn't get the wrong idea. I liked what we were doing, loved it actually, but I just needed to know what this was.
"We are going what makes us happy." He said, simply. "At least that's what I'm doing. How about you, Hermione? Are you doing what you want to do?" He asked, and pressed his lips against my neck right under my ear, causing me to shiver again.
I nodded and rested my head back against his chest, smiling to myself.