Started: Friday, November 04, 2005

Ended: Friday, November 4th 2005

Fire Witch- He he…here you go.

Fork-tofu-pingpong-fish- Cooleo, mate.

Moony655- Wow! I'm thrilled that you like it so much. I love hearing things like that and I'm ecstatic that you believe I capture emotions right. I really hope you continue feeling that way!

Julies07- thanks!

M- HAHAHAHA, no-I'm not some psycho…I don't cut myself and I doubt I'm that wacked up. I can't go see a physiatrist 'cause my problems aren't that 'deep' and plus, I can't afford one. I just…know how to make drama.

Suger-huny-bun- Yay! It's difficult for me to write 'cute' parts.

MO6M-Yeah….I need a beta reader. I just am too lazy to get one. I hope you continue to like it, though.

EarthSprite- YES! Two thumbs up is VERY good. Thank you!

AnjaliMalfoy- Yay! I'm glad you found it funny. I sure did!

-Scp- Thank you!

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE!

(I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER)

When Pain Fears

James hated Defense against the Dark Arts class. He found it slightly intimidating, vulgar and secretive. Their teacher was not bad-not at all, but ever since he was little he was unnerved by the subject. Since D.A.D.A was a rather uninteresting subject in his eyes, he decided to focus not on what Professor Nadir said, but what drama the school year had been. Yes, the year thus far was already worthy of one of those strange muggle shows Lily had told him about that were packed with angst, humor, deception, disgrace, action and drama.

Everyone seemed to be having problems. He, himself, was still slowly dealing with his heart-wrenching problem with his obsession for blood and pain. This had been the longest he had gone without cutting since he started. He still longed for the relaxation and sublime reality it caused, but was determined to see it end. The silver knife was hidden in his drawer, tucked beneath some socks and underwear. James didn't know what he might do if Lily ever found out he still kept it. It was like a souvenir to a memory he wasn't willing to disown. However horrible and strange the memory was, he felt that it was his right to always remember it.

He was finally engaged to the woman of his dreams. Sixth year seemed only a distant memory, something he couldn't fully tap into. He could scarcely remember life without Lily by his side. He didn't want to remember Lily Evans as anything other then his lover. When she said yes both times, to dating and to marriage, he could swear he hadn't been happier. Winning the Quidditch House Cup couldn't even compare to this.

His best mate, Sirius, was being killed softly by his girlfriend. That was the major problem in Padfoot's life. He was being driven mad by something no one would have expected he could be by. All of a sudden she seemed to be so distant, so strange.

"Alright, so, everyone...Bogarts. We will each face one today. Now, come on." James looked up and followed his class mates to the front of the class room. Bogarts were nothing to him. They were just simple creatures who really held no place in his life. He already knew what he was afraid of. It haunted him every night in his dreams-he didn't need a creature to transform into it to prove it.

"Mr. Black, please step forward." Professor Nadir said. Sirius nudged James in the ribs and flashed him a cunning grin. A few sighs could be heard from around the room. Sirius may have latched himself a girlfriend, but he hadn't lost his charm for being quite charming and debonair.

The Bogart escaped from the damp, dark closet-instantly filling the room with a terrible, ferocious scene. There was blood, dying and screams-a war. Some people locked her hands over their ears and eyes to escape the horrible sight. Sirius, for once, looked rather intimidated. His eyes were locked on the scene, and with his straight white teeth bared, he shouted out, "Ridiculous!"

The Bogarts dematerialized, turning into a happier scene and Professor Nadir called Alyssa Mc Neil up. She was a short girl with brownish red hair and two heart melting eyes. James thought she was very cute and she adored James with a passion. The popular Seeker wasn't in love with the girl, but had a special place in his heart for her.

The Bogart morphed into a large clown-its grin terrifying and murderous. She called out the counter curse and eagerly jumped into the back of the line. The clown was sucker-punched and fell to the floor, lifeless.

"Miss Cammolie, it's your turn." The dark haired girl waltzed to the front of the room, looking rather bored. James felt Sirius shift uncomfortably next to him, and watched as his friend stared nervously at his girlfriend.

Drusella's stride was slow and somewhat cool. She seemed to be calm with the whole situation, and why not-it was Drusella after all.

She stopped in front of the closet and the Bogart instantly transformed. It was no longer the knocked out Clown Alyssa had cursed it into-no, it was much more frightening.

A man of some kind stood before her. His pale, lifeless eyes stared into her own grey eyes, and dark, unruly hair framed its grayish skinned face. He wore long, black clothing that seemed antique and old. He slowly grinned at her, showing off pearly white teeth.

Drusella let out a small, scared shriek. The class seemed somewhat startled by the brave girl's terrified expression. Her eyes were wide with fear and she was slowly backing up as the vampire drew closer and closer towards her.

"Come on, Dru." Sirius whispered, looking pale himself. James stared at him strangely.

"You're not afraid of vampires!" he said curiously. Sirius shook his head.

"No, but I'm scared of that look. Why can't I help her? She looks so frightened and helpless. That's the same expression she had that night after we were in the kitchens."

James paused for a moment.

"Vampires…why would Drusella be afraid of vampires?" Sirius shrugged.

"No…you're not real. You're not real.'' Drusella muttered. Her hand clenched around her wand, though they were sweaty and shaking.

"You're not real. No, you're not real. Ridiculous!" she shouted. Suddenly, the vampire halted, looking rather agitated and the next student stomped forward. Drusella stalked back to the crowed, with her arms crossed over her chest. James looked at her quizzically, and nudged Sirius.

"I need to talk to her. Maybe this will explain a few things."

After class, James met up with Lily.

"Hey, love." He said with a grin. Lily kissed him and pulled back with a grin on her own face.

"Uh-oh…I know that look. What have you done?" James shot her a look of mock offence.

"What? Why must you always assume that I am up to no good?" Lily laughed again.

"Because you always are, you marauder!" she said. James stopped to think of it and then nodded.

"Fair enough." The couple began to walk outside for an afternoon break. It was somewhat sunny and beautiful outside. They walked hand in hand and talked about the day's events.

"Yeah, Drusella seemed pretty freaked after the Bogart thing.'' James said softly. Lily looked rather worried. Drusella was a strong girl who was never fazed by anything life threw at her. She was so calm and collective and down to earth.

"Sirius looked pretty intense to when he saw her. They ought to be talking about it right now."

"Good. What was your Bogart, anyways, James?" Lily asked, wrapping her arms around herself. James wrapped an arm around her and gently kissed the top of her head.

"Awe, nothing you really need to know about. Don't worry about it, okay?" Lily just nodded, but was still rather curious. She took his hands in hers and frowned.

"How're you doing?" she asked in a tone that explained what she meant. James sighed and looked down at his hands.

"Pretty good, thus far. I haven't cut in weeks…months even. But…I still…can't help but sometimes feel that crazed urge-"

"Oh, James, you don't know how proud I am of you! You're so strong to resist that terrible urge. I know I could never handle it, myself. That's why I love you James. You're so cool and tough and strong about everything in life." James laughed and blushed.

"I'm not all that. Really, I'm a big coward. I started the cutting, remember? That takes some coward."

Lily smiled at him, and they stopped as she kissed his hands.

"No, James. No, you are not. I love everything about you, from your skills to your defaults. You're little imperfections are what are most attractive."

"Like my 'narcissism' and my 'irritability'?" James said with a memorable grin. Lily gaped and hit him lightly in the chest.

"You still are going on about that? How many times must I apologize?" James laughed and took her into his arms.

"Oh, I love you Lily. You know I don't care about all six years of mockery and meanness." He ripped himself from her arms and tore down the path.

"James Potter, you get your butt back here right now!" Lily shouted. She laughed as he continued to run and brushed a strand of red hair from her face. He was so cute.

"Drusella! Drusella, wait!" Sirius called after the skunk haired girl. She spun around and gave Sirius a kind, loving smile.

"Hello, Sirius." She said. He smiled at her and gave her a gentle kiss. She kissed back, causing him to moan slightly.

"Wow, thank you." He said with a grin, as they pulled apart. She smiled and gave him a hug.

"No problem. What's up?" He pulled away from her and frowned.

"Drusella…why didn't you tell me?" She looked rather confused. "Why didn't you tell me about the vampires? Have they been bothering you?" Sirius asked. Drusella looked at the ground. Sirius grasped her shoulders and turned her forcefully to face him.

"Tell me, Drusella! I hate seeing you like this." Drusella looked at him with a terrified expression.

"Yes! Yes, they were out there! They're everywhere!" she shouted, with tears in her grey eyes. Sirius looked at her unexpectedly. She looked so fragile, so helpless and…so beautiful.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Sirius asked slowly. Drusella looked down again.

"I'm such a coward. I know you hate me-"

"Drusella, you know I don't. I could never hate you." She looked at him.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Okay…there you go. Sorry that I haven't posted in awhile. I'm REALLY sorry. So, what do you think is going to happen? This story is about to get a lot more angsty. So much drama has erupted in my life. I guess they were right when they said High School isn't your buddy middle school was. Yeesh, you'd think it wouldn't be so chaotic for me-but, alas, it is. I'm in JROTC and the people in it too are what create the drama in the first place. It's worth it though. I'm working on the next chapter so I hope this one is sufficient until I can post the next, which, trust me, will be longer. I wanted to end this one with the promise thing because…I don't know, it just sounded right. Well, I've got to go do work for First Sergeant, so, have a great day!