It's Not Over

There was once a time I trusted you. I gave you everything I could do in my power. Even though it wasn't a lot you still gave me a smile. But now you destroyed everything we had. In the end was it all just dirty lies? Were you just deceiving me instead of loving me? I wish I could hate you more then ever now. I wish I could if only my heart would let me…

"Why… Yuki… I thought-"

The tears started going down my face, and so did the pain in my heart. I could feel the darkness calling out my name, and it whispered gently to me the words of despair. My body was frozen, but I wanted to run away. Run so far from my twisted reality.

"Aw his crying, what you do to him… My dear Yuki…?"

My dear Yuki…? How dare call him that…

The woman giggles, and whispers something in Yuki's ear. I step back once more, and turned to run. My thoughts of what's the best thing to do seem to blur out. I couldn't think straight. All I could do was run away.

"Wait Shuichi…"

With my back turned I stop and listened to his voice that trapped me. The tears didn't stop, and either did the pain in side my heart.

"I'm S-"

"I don't want to hear it…!"

I knew what he was going to say. I knew it was the word sorry, but I couldn't stand to hear it. I was tried of the same old lie, but theirs a side of me that what's to believe what his saying is true. And that's the side of me that would always let him in.

"I know what you're going to say. I know it by heart now that it runs over, and over in my head. But Yuki…"

I quickly turn towards Yuki with tears going down my face.

"… I don't think that's going to work anymore."

I turned back around, and started to run down the hall. I could hear Yuki calling out my name, but I couldn't stop this time. Not even if it's the voice I love so much. I press the elevator button, and waited for the doors to open. I could hear his voice still. The elevator door opens letting me in. I turn around to see Yuki coming towards the elevator, towards me, but before he could get in, the doors closed. But for a brief second our eyes met, and that's when I seen the sadness in his eyes, and his regret. I fall to my knees, and banged on the silver doors of the elevator. The tears continued down my face, while I wait for the elevator to get to the main floor.

Yuki please don't look at me like that when I'm feeling like this…

My mind twisted around the reality that is mine. And I started to crumble inside, as my heart began to throb. The elevator doors opened to my freedom in to death. Once they opened I could see Hiro coming towards the elevator. I decided to run, and avoid Hiro I didn't want to face any one. I just wanted to disappear. To have every thing around me just fade away, and have reality far away from me. I stepped out of the elevator and started running. I looked at Hiro, and seen the smile on his face when he seen me. But I couldn't stop I didn't want to face him, not like this. So I did what I planned, and passed Hiro hoping he wouldn't notice my tears.

"Hey Shuichi-"

I'm sorry Hiro I just can't talk to you… Not when I'm like this again.

Then as I expected I heard Hiro's voice calling out to me, but I ignored him and raced on. Suddenly I heard someone else calling out to me, but much closer and louder, as I was about to exit the hotel.

"SHUICHI"!

The voice that I loved called out my name as if heartbroken as me. I knew who it was, and I knew the words he was going to say. But I couldn't dare turn and look, because I didn't want to be hurt anymore. I ran out side the exit doors, and ignore that he ever called me. I ignored that Yuki was ever there, but before I couldn't even leave the area. I could suddenly feel an embrace behind me. He held me gently, but at the same time tightly as if afraid to lose me.

"Shuichi don't run from me… Please!"

Yuki…

I could feel his heart pounding from coming after me. His arms held me close to his chest. I didn't say anything and waited for what he had to say. I could hear Hiro's voice coming towards us.

"Eiri Yuki what are you doing here? What's going on? What have you done to Shuichi? ... Shuichi…?"

Hiro's voice sounded concerned when he spoke to me, but when he spoke towards Yuki his voice sounded of anger. I didn't want to stay and explain anything, because I knew it would bring out the darkness and pain. And I knew that it would bring out such feelings only bring me closer to wanting death. I wanted to die, but his embrace, his voice wouldn't let me. I was trapped by my twisted love for Yuki.

"Yuki let me go… please don't do this to me. I don't want to love you; I don't want to feel this pain I have for you… Yuki…"

My feels turned in to tears that fell on to Yuki's scented shirt of woman's perfume. I felt sick smelling the scent of betrayal on him. I gulped up the courage to tare away from Yuki's strong hold.

"YUKI LET ME GO!"

I ripped away from Yuki and turned around to face the man I loved. And to stare at him with my broke heart, but when I faced him I couldn't bare to say anything to him. His eyes had a deep sadness as mine did, but at the same time cruelty and nothingness.

"I love you Shuichi, and I'm not letting you go. You belong to me."

My body stared to shake at how Yuki responded towards me, and at how his voice spoke to me. I stepped back afraid of the words he might say to me, to keep me trapped in his cage. I could suddenly hear Hiro's voice becoming angrier.

"What are you saying to Shuichi? His not your pet to keep locked in a cage. You can't do this to him. Can't you see your hurting him!"

A smile crossed Yuki's face, and I was stricken with a scene of fear.

"That's where you're wrong. He belonged to me the day he said he loved me… Now Shuichi isn't that true? You love me don't you?"

His question pained me as if trying to say that I was the one at fault. He spoke to me with out looking or glancing anywhere else, as if to trap me with his eyes. My mind wondered about what he could be thinking, but I couldn't read him. Hiro started to walk towards Yuki. Once he got close enough he held on to his shoulder, and spoke to Yuki with anger.

"Leave Shuichi alone I won't have you hurting him anymore."

Suddenly as if this were a dream Yuki threw his arm towards Hiro face causing his arm to hit him. I held my hands to my face in shock. I watched Hiro fall to the grounded, as Yuki glance towards Hiro with anger.

"Don't you dare touch me, and tell me what to do. I won't ever listen to the likes of you."

I wanted to run, but I didn't know why I didn't. Suddenly but expectedly Yuki looked back at me with a gentle smile.

"Now Shuichi don't get me angry, I don't want to hurt you either. Can't you see you hurt me as well? You say you loved me, but yet you push me away for you. And then you go and say you don't want to love me. How did you expect me to react?"

He starts to walk towards me with the smile I loved, but feared so much right now. I stepped slowly not wanting his touch, and feared that he might tear me apart with his words.

"Yuki why are you saying this… I didn't mean… I mean I just… You hurt me too!"

I was confused to what I was supposed to say, and what I was supposed to do. How could I just walk in his arms knowing this fear? What does he expect from me?

"Now I know I hurt you, but it doesn't me I don't love you. Why are you trying to avoid me? Isn't this, what you wanted is for me to love you?"

I didn't want to answer I was afraid now to say anything to him. I was afraid he might twist my words, as he is doing now. I didn't know this Yuki, and this isn't the Yuki that I loved.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE! DON"T YOU TALK TO HIM LIKE THAT! HE ISN'T THE ONE AT FAULT HERE, YOU ARE!"

Hiro glances towards Yuki with a glare. My guess that Hiro knew what was going on; there was no need for me to explain myself. Hiro was here to protect me from falling part again.

"Shut up I'm not speaking with you. So why don't you just stay out of this?"

Hiro steps up and takes his bold stances. He glances at me and then looks at Yuki. My tears are gone, but I could still feel the throbbing pain inside my chest. This hurt and this new developed fear from Yuki.

To Be Continued…