Dear Diary OR Hogwarts' Romeo & Juliet

by Raekitty13

Disclaimer: Dudes, J.K. Doesn't need a part time job all year long, she's as rich as or richer than the Queen of England. Me? Yeah, I'm broke.

Author's Notes: Well then, let's see how long this takes me to finish today... sorry kinda late =)

Chapter Eight:

Dear Journal;

(Yes I titled this entry with the word "dear". Do I actually love this crappy thing? Me thinks not.)

Any Way...

Dear Journal;

Word got around that I was making out with Luna Lovegood and now everyone thinks I'm some kind of softy... I heard Granger started it all, stupid twit, what would she know of my love life, unless she's stalking me. Then again, that wouldn't surprise me. Who wouldn't want to stalk the Slytherin Sex God?

Whoever did it though, really has me in a tough spot. I am not a softy. I was just making out with one of Ravenclaw's greatest. So what if she lives in a different universe sometimes? Okay, so I didn't admit to making out with her. I told her to her face at lunch to stop spreading rumors that we hooked up. I had the whole Great Hall going. I also made her cry, it was me against her, and obviously I was more convincing. That would have to be the best part about her being in her own universe most of the time. See? Sneaking out with really hott, mental cases can have its perks. Pick up on the tricks of the trade dumb diary. They might come in handy for you sometime.

That'd be weird... a diary picking up a chick... OH MYRLIN! She's rubbing off on me... Luna would have said something like that! Maybe sneaking out with really hott mental cases also has some disadvantages. Better make sure to keep those in check. Okay, so no making out with her tonight... or tomorrow night. I should be good.

The other disadvantage was Pansy. Of course she was all up on me about making out with somebody else. I was seriously like, "HELLO, mad psycho chick, did you NOT just see me make her CRY in front of the WHOLE school? Do I purposely make YOU cry after I make out with you?" But my logic didn't seem to comfort her. Instead it seemed to make her more suspicious. She decided that if I were cheating on her, I would surely keep a log of it in my trusty diary. So what did she do?

She read you.

And, of course, I did keep a log of it… and it wasn't because I was guilty like she was hoping I would be. Instead, it was because I was boasting about it. I told her that she was the one who wanted my "diary" to become like my best friend. She was the one who wanted me to become more in tune with myself. This is what she wanted.

Which lead to her bawling all over the place. She was ranting and raving, flailing her arms and trying to beat the crap out of me or at least make me wince. The only part of the conversation that actually made sense was her screaming, "Are you saying that I WANTED you to date other girls?"

I then took the time to tell her that she couldn't accept me the way I was and tried to change me. I tried to please her so I changed. However, changing a little thing didn't seem to be good enough for her. So, yes, indirectly she did want me to date other girls. Not because she actually wanted ME to date other girls, but because she wanted to date a different guy; one who wasn't me and I wasn't about to change everything I was because it wasn't good enough for her.

She continued to sob, marched up to me and flung her wand in my face proclaiming that the least I could have done was dump her with honor and not go around snogging other girls. After she had cursed the life out of my money maker she demanded to know how many other girls I had cheated on her with.

I told her she'd need Snape's Veritaserum to drag their names out of me. Of course she then screeched that if she really wanted to know the answers she could just transfigure herself into either Crabe or Goyle. She really got angry when I told her that it would be easier for her to just use Polyjuice Potion instead.

That was when she started spouting off about Granger again.

Oh, and her hexes went from amusingly painful to below the belt if you catch my drift.

Just so you know, I'm sitting in Madam Pumpfry's office. She is currently trying to reverse all of the curses. Had Pansy done them one at a time, it would have been easier to reverse, but as it is, they've all kind of mixed themselves together.

Huh. Somebody's knocking on the door. I wonder which other sorry bloke dumped a clingy girlfriend tonight as well. Honestly I think I got the longer end of the stick, I mean, if somebody intelligent like Granger had been my girlfriend, I'd probably be disfigured forever.

Merlin's shorts! Lovegood could have killed me and made it look like I was never born in the first place… I think I should probably apologize…

Diary, Journal thing… You remember how I mentioned that somebody was knocking on the door?

Yeah, it was Granger. Apparently Pansy did a better job at jinxing my face than I gave her credit for and Madam Pumpfry had sent for Granger's help.

At first she ripped me to shreds too- Granger that is. But she wasn't mad that I cheated on Pansy. Or at least, that wasn't what she was yelling about first anyway. She was totally pissed about me making Luna cry.

That was when I remembered that Lovegood hung out with Potter who hung out with Granger.

She ranted and raved for awhile and then demanded that I give her one good reason for why she should help me when I had hurt so many people.

I told her that my looks were the only thing I had going for me. I was a stupid moron who couldn't see properly because I threw away the good things that were always staring me in the face. I also told her that I was a mommy's boy while I looked like daddy. Now that I didn't look like daddy she would more than likely disown me. And that daddy would disown me for getting caught cheating in the first place not because I was cheating but because I wasn't bright enough to keep it under wraps.

I guess she must have taken some pitty in me because although she was still glaring at me she fixed my face. Minus the pimples that spell out CHEATING MORON across my forehead. And yes, I have tried EVERYTHING possible to get rid of them. Madam Pumpfry wouldn't even bother helping me.

Oh yeah, and there is this sudden dire need to grovel at Luna's feet until she forgives me… and stand on a table in the Great Hall and sing the Sorting Hat's song. I think that was Luna's idea of punishment more than Hermione's… the singing thing anyway.

Better go and apologize, I'm kinda hoping that if I do the burning desire to sing my heart out will go away,

Draco