T & T rate the gods
by two Annyomous writers ( Actually me and Tonto, but hidden so the gods won't kill us {But Tonto gets the 1 Mil gross munny})
There are twelve Olympian Gods, Posiedon, Zeus, Hera, Athena, Ares, Apollo, Artemis, Dionycus, Aphrodite, Demeter, Hespeastus and Hermes. Add also Hades and Hestia, who are almost bassicaly the olympian gods and you have 14. But how do they rank in preference?
Hestia 4.5 Stars
Hestia is the Goddess of the hearth. When Dionycus joined the olympians, she gave up her throne for him. This act of sacrifice is what has gotten her this rank, and her lack of mortal affairs also gives her credit. If only she had Zeus's bolt, then she would be the best goddess of them all
Hades 3 Stars
Hades may be the god of the dead, but he isn't a bad guy. He just feels abandoned and rejected. And while he may have his moments with the mortals, he still does care a lot for his wife ( lets remember still he kidnapped her so that lowers the score.) and of course the helm of darkness is a good bonus.
Posiedon 3.5 Stars
The god of the Sea, Poseidon is quite well known for his affairs, and of course there is that whole rivarly with Athena thing. But deep down he is a good guy, the ruler of the sea with the Trident in his grasp whose kingdom's palace rivals that of Olympus, and of course the ruler of horses deserve reconisition
Zeus 2.5 Stars
The king of the gods is the king of affairs. He had a few kids with his wife as he should, but then had hundreds with mortals, nymphs, other gods really Zeus, did that marriage counseling help? I would say more, but I really don't want to be barbequed, but as a wise man once said, he is more like the god of theatre
Hera 2 Stars
The saying of a holy cow goes perfectly here. This goddess is quite spoiled, and deep down is a grump of a queen. She really should have stayed in the chair of Haespestus, did she or did she not throw him off the mountain as a child. Bassicly, out of all of your girls Zeus, why choose the evilish one?
Athena 4 Stars
Okay, the goddess of wisdom came out of Zeus's head, wierd isn't it. But she is what a good goddess should be, caring but cunning. She may have half blood children, but unlike most gods she didn't exactly cheat on any person, right? Athena is pretty good, and I'd rather have her on my side then not
Ares 2.5 Stars
This god of war may be a hot headed grump, jerk, war hawk and generally unpleasant guy, but at least he doesn't do the whole cheat on your wife thing, eh, if he had a wife. However if I had to choose to be either stuck on a desert island, or be glued to him, I think I'll avoid the knife and take the island hands down
Apollo 4 Stars
Apollo is the more, get along able type of good. He wields power, but doesn't use it like a moon adled fool, no offense to his sister. He does flirt, which dillutes his score considerably, but his character is rather like able. So the god of poetry, prophecy, the sun and archery has a diverse talent pool, unlike some other gods I mentioned
Artemis 4.5 Stars
The lunatic but not a lunatic goddess, Artemis doesn't flirt, is not a jerk and is pretty good to the mortals and gods, so she is high ranked. But she is a bit prudish, and almost terrified of the species, boys. She does make a good hunter, and is the kind of god, or goddess as it may be I would trust
Dionycus 1.5 stars
Really, what is this guy doing on the grand council? The god of wine, really is wine that important. He isn't like able at all, like Apollo, isn't attractive like Aphrodite ( If Ares asks, I am Nobody) and like virtually every god, has too much fun with others. If I were his wife or mother, I would slap him with a mace
Aphrodite 2.5 Stars
The basic, Oh I am so dreamy goddess is this girl, Aphrodite born of what was removed from the grandfather of the gods, Uranus ( I really don't feel like explaining the details of it, kids read these stories). She cheats, has a few too many demi god children and I really feel sorry for her arranged husband, Haespestus
Demeter 3 Stars
Ah the goddess of grain and the harvest, one of the more important goddesses. Sure she is a little paranoid, no help given from her brother taking her daughter, but still she had a very important job. But she still manages the occasional demi god, really are us mortals so hard to resist?
Haespestus 4 Stars
Ah the gods smith, he is big, lame ( but in the body sort of way, call him lame and you will be eating molten lead) and unloved by mother or wife. You can't help but feel sorry to this giant guy, he does all the smithing and he gets a horrid mother and wife. Underdogs like him are always so good to cheer for
Hermes 3.5 Stars
We leave you last, Hermes. The god of messaging, the god of travel, the god of thieves, did you check your pockets. He may be far from perfect, he steals and he flirts but he has a very important role to play and thus we salute you, the first instant messenger. And thus the reviews end
And note, they will find out Tonto wrote this review, and all of the gods with under a 3.5 will find you, sorry Tonto that was in the contract, hey you got 1 million from this book so be happy, and yes Omnitrix will be stuck helping you fight those gods off. MUWAHHAHAHAHAHAHA