Part X

EPOV (Edward)

As I made my way to Bella the doors creaked open, it was loud enough to make everyone's head turn. In came in a man I could recognize miles away, Nathaniel Dunbar, my uncle. He was my mother's younger brother, not a year past…thirty eight. At his side was a blonde girl, to every other man she must have been the most beautiful girl there. She stood tall and her hair was down to just above her waist. Her dress was a glimmering black. Surprisingly so, she didn't manage to keep my attention, though her beauty was astounding.

Emmett joined me from behind. "Hmm, our dear uncle has married, once again."

"It seems so."

"Edward, listen, I haven't had a chance to say that –"

"You're sorry." I finished for him. "Don't worry one more person won't make any difference, I'll live. Come let's welcome our uncle and…his wife." From either sides of the room Robert, my mother, Emmett and I approached our guests. Behind me Bella came to my side. "He's my uncle." I informed her.

She almost laughed. I found no humor in my words. "She's my cousin."

On my other side Emmett was pretty shocked. "Really, you are related to her?" His voice was implying all but compliment. I scowled. "Sorry. You're related to her?" He changed his tone though it sounded forced. Bella nodded.

We reached them our uncle had already greeted my mother and brother. "Edward, you've engaged…perhaps married." He spoke looking at Bella. The girl's eyes, beside him, widened.

"Not yet but it seems you have, uncle."

He smiled, though it was undecipherable. It wasn't clear it was either was sarcasm or joy. "I have. This is Rosalie Dunbar."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Rosalie." Emmett took her hand and kissed it. He held her hand a moment too long. He was hypnotized by her beauty.

"You as well…." She veered off.

"Emmett Wilfred, at your service." I was hoping that his attitude hadn't only shocked me. It would make sense if it did considering my state of mind. I looked around and Robert had an odd look on his face as did my mother, even Bella. My uncle had a look of distaste.

My two remaining cousins joined us as well. George and William. William was still upset with me though not enough not to speak to me. He'd said a word or two. George I hadn't spoken too, I hadn't given him the chance. Nathaniel was neither uncle of George nor William, they simply knew each other from family dinners in London.

Everyone was introduced. "Uncle, this is Isabella Swan, Bella."

I finished introducing her and she gave Rosalie a hug. "She is my cousin." Rosalie informed my uncle.

"Edward might I ask a question?" I nodded. "Is this beautiful girl to be your bride, soon?"

It was a thing about my uncle…he was blunt. "God willing." I replied. Bella's face reddened to a deep scarlet. Everyone had said commentaries under their breath, none of which I acknowledged.

We sat down and made small talk to each other. I noticed something odd with Emmett. He kept eyeing my uncle's wife. This was just like him going after another man's woman. He was that irresponsible thought our family would say that he was a saint compared to me. He had had a couple of women but the ones that he had had not been his for the taking. They were married and he couldn't care a bit, the wrath of their husband didn't trouble him at all.

Eventually I managed to excuse both Bella and I from the gathering. Bella asked once more what was wrong with me and I finally told her I could comply and tell her the truth.

"You're going to tell me?" She made sure.

I sighed. "You're not going to let it go?"

"No."

"Fine let's go."

"Where?"

"My bedroom if you don't mind. It's the only private place. I only want to talk." I promised.

"Is it odd that I trust you?"

I managed to smile. "A little bit. I assure you it's not mistake."

"I hope not." I led her up the stairs and into my room. "It seems a lot nicer in here from last time."

I shrugged.

She took a seat at the foot of my bed. "It's something bad. I can see it in your face."

I took a deep breath. I might as well just spit it out. "The only parent I had remaining died last night. My true mother died years ago and my father was forced to keep me against his will. He called for me and told me this from his deathbed."

She stood up. I might've been too direct but I had to say something. "I cannot imagine what you must feel.." She approached me. Her eyes full of concern. Then she did something quite unexpected. She put her arms around me.

I returned her gesture and put my arms around her waist pulling her closer to me. "Thank you." I whispered.

She pulled away. "I'm sorry that might've been a little –"

"No, it was…perfect. The worst part is that I became what he was. I will admit that I have had many women in my bed. I'm not proud of it and I don't think he was either."

"This is why you didn't want to attend."

I nodded. "I'm filled with sorrow, I am, but this man never treated me like a son. I was never good enough and finally I ceased my attempts to please him. I always thought that there was something wrong with me."

"There is nothing wrong with you."

"I'm glad you feel that way. By the way, this is between you and I. Other than my mother, no one knows.

"Your brother doesn't know?"

"No, Robert doesn't know and I would like it to remain that way. This is something personal for me, I wouldn't want this to be tomorrow's gossip."

"Why did you tell me?"

"I could ask the same kind of question, why would you want to know?"

She looked away from my gaze. "Not sure yet." I questioned her words. "I wish I had an answer to that. I wish I knew why I was here in your bedroom, alone. I wish I knew why I came to you. I wish I knew why I care so much."

"You don't know?"

She shrugged. "This is madness, I know what you'll do to me and yet I'm willing to wait for it."

"I would never do anything to harm you."

"You're not being realistic. I may –" She stopped short.

She was going to say it, I knew she was. "You what? Say it out loud."

"Nothing." She replied quickly. She looked up at me with desperation. I raised my hand to stroke her cheek.

"I would tell you why I care so much but I think you know." Again she released the hold of my gaze. "I'm not afraid to say it."

"It will only complicate things."

"Why?" I challenged.

She scoffed. "You have to see that I don't belong here."

"I don't care what anyone says. Robert wouldn't dare stand in my way and neither would anyone in this household, I wouldn't stand for it. As for the people, they have ther own image of me, I don't care for it but I'll live without their approval. I don't need it, I will never hold the title of Duke of Havenport. I'm a bastard, no one may know it but Robert won't step down, I never expected him to, none of that matters to me."

"It matters to me."

I sighed. "Just stop. Let's change the topic we're not talking about that, I can't even know if you're sincere, you refuse to say it. Let's talk about something else." I did not want to argue with her but all I said was sincere.

"Do I look like a liar?" She said offended.

"You won't say it."

"You believe in god?" She challenged.

"That's not the same thing. This has nothing to do with my belief system."

"Do you?" She pressed.

"To an extent I do."

"Then you have faith." She paused and waited for my answer. I reluctantly nodded. "Then have faith in me, just because I won't say it doesn't mean it doesn't exist."

"Why won't say it?" I questioned.

"Because when I say it, it becomes real." I shot her a puzzled look. "I don't want it to be real, I don't want to be disappointed. I don't want to imagine what will never be. All of this is temporary, what you feel for me is not real. You are worth far more, I cannot offer you what another woman can. You will toss be aside as soon as you realize this."

"Do you really believe that, that I will disappoint you?"

She scoffed. "I have facts, you are not known for being courteous towards women. I know what will happen, I have heard the stories."

She was right, I couldn't deny it. There was that possibility, that I would change my mind. But I don't see that, I don't see myself hurting her…I couldn't bear it. "Then why are you so hell bent on me believing your love for me? If you think I will disappoint you then why do you want me to believe?"

BPOV (Bella)

He had asked a great question, one I had no answer for. He was good with words but I knew the truth. I wanted him but I didn't want him to want me because it would make me yearn for something that was so unreachable.