* I want to thank all the ones I've chatted with for encouraging me to sit down and write this story. It is based on an actual event that took place in my own life three years ago. While I did write poetry at the time to help deal with it I never really sat down and 'got it all out'. Thanks to my Beta Reader too—though all mistakes are still my own.

Always in My Heart

CHAPTER FOUR

SCENE SIX

The sun had sent down its heat unmercifully most of the day as the men drove the cattle towards the northern pasture. Gene rode up alongside Nick just as Heath went after a cow that was doing its best to wander away from the other cattle. Nick couldn't help but notice how tired Gene looked and said as much adding, "Maybe you should have stayed home. After all; you're not used to this line of work-even if you are a Barkley."

Gene only laughed, "I wouldn't worry about me. A body's gonna get tired doing things that are 'out of their comfort zone'. Kind of like Jarrod the first time father insisted on taking our dear brother out on a cattle drive. I still remember how he looked when he came into the house."

Nick bust up laughing. That had been a sight to behold. Jarrod, so used to his studies and mental work, walking in looking stiffer than any board ever thought of being. He'd looked like that for hours on end. "True enough; still, I think it best if you give it a second thought before going amd doing this again."

'You're not trying that again are you?' Jarrod stood in the kitchen watching as Gene took one item after another off the shelves, looked at one of his science books and then began measuring one thing after another into a mixing bowl.

"Why not? How am I going to prove anything if I don't give it a shot?" Eugene turned his head and looked at his oldest brother, "besides, nothing bad is going to happen if it doesn't work. It's not like I'm eating the stuff." The grin on his face looked so ridiculous (he'd made it that way on purpose )and got both of them howling with laughter.

Gene leaned forward in his saddle and tilted his head to one side then, after a mere two seconds, said, "I thought about it. When's the next drive?" he winked at Nick then rode off towards Heath. Nick started chuckling and shook his head.

Heath threw some more wood on the fire as he and Nick sat next to the campfire, Gene lay on the ground under his blanket. Thinking his brother was asleep, Heath turned to Nick, "He did great out there, I just hope he didn't overdo it. It's not like he does this every day."

"He's a Barkley," Nick chuckled still remembering Gene's comment about Jarrod and the memory it had brought back to him, "He just needs to get used to something besides sitting behind a desk or doing those experiments of his."

Before Heath could say anything Gene piped up, "I'd listen to big brother, Heath. It ain't wise to argue with him." Both Nick and Heath turned their heads with surprise on their faces. Before either could say a word he, as if reading their thoughts, added, "Yea, I said ain't…just don't tell mother." That sent fits of laughter through both of his brothers.

SCENE SEVEN

Gene walked up and down the streets of Stockton. It was the first time since arriving home that he'd taken time to do so. As he came to one of the smaller shops he stopped and looked inside the window. A young girl was looking at one of the dolls; she had auburn hair.

'Look at this!' Sarah held up a doll she was looking to buy for her little cousin, 'Think she'll like this one?'

"That gal would like any doll. It wouldn't matter if it was missing half its hair and an eye!' Gene had laughed as Sarah put the doll in front of her face and started talking for the doll-in an overdone theatrical voice. In fact, he'd almost hurt his sides laughing.

Then another more serious conversation came to mind. "He shouldn't have done it! He should have said something!' She'd been talking about her grandfather and a decision he'd made.

He tried to comfort her, but 'had made the mistake of agreeing with the old man'. That's why she'd been up on that blasted mountain in the first place! She'd flown into a rage, threw out one thing after another at him then ran off and up into 'that place'. When he felt a tap on his shoulder he jumped three feet in the air.

"Amanda!" Gene was taken aback when, after getting his heart back in place, he turned to see Sarah's good friend standing next to him. He almost didn't recognize her what with her new glasses and the dress she was wearing; she'd always dressed more like Calamity Jane than anything else. "What are you doing here?" She was supposed to be over in England going to school!

She shrugged her shoulders, "You forgot this." She handed him the locket he'd given to Sarah on her twenty-first birthday. "You didn't leave school and travel all the way from England to give me this," he held up the chain, "What's going on?"

Amanda shook her head and admitted, "You. I believe you lost something." She held up a very small brown book, "When I found you'd left Minnesota I figured you'd come home."

He practically ripped the book he'd believed lost from her hands, "Did you read it?" he asked with a bit of harshness in his voice. It did not; however, faze her.

"Only the part it was opened to and, no," she smiled kindly, "I haven't said a word to anyone nor do I plan on it. Do you want to talk?"

For a moment he hesitated, then nodded; might as well, she already knew the truth, "If you'll promise to keep your mouth shut no matter what that is."

Amanda smiled as they started walking, "Sarah would never forgive me if I did."

From where they stood Jarrod and Heath watched as Gene put the item he held inside the pocket inside his jacket then walked off talking to the stranger. "I wonder who she is." Heath smiled as he watched them disappear.

While Jarrod wondered too he wondered more about the small book she'd handed his brother and the look on his face. He was becoming more and more certain there was something that Gene was hiding from them.