I'm baaaaack! Sorry it's been so long, I've been feeling uninspired, and plus the initial reaction to this story was a little underwhelming. I read the stats... upwards of 150 people read, but only two reviewed. TWO! This isn't a shameless plea for reviews (yes, it is), I'm just saying. It's tricky to write when you don't think there's any interest... Anyway, here I am with "HELP! I'm In Love With My Stepdad!" I had to use him. I just had to. I couldn't think of any way not to. Hope I did alright :)

Emma Pillsbury was confused. Finn had burst into her office nearly fifteen minutes ago, and despite the fact that he hadn't quit talking once, she wasn't entirely sure what was wrong.

"... so, I'm just thinking 'Wow, how amazing', but then I can't quit thinking that I shouldn't think that, especially not about them. What do you think?" Finn finished.

"I think that you need to slow down," Emma informed him. "Start over. What exactly is going on?"

"I think I'm in love," Finn said, unexpectedly concise.

"With Rachel Berry?" Emma asked.

"No, not Rachel. That's the problem," he said with a sigh. "Well, part of it, anyway."

"What's the other part?" Emma asked, thinking this was probably the correct line of questioning.

"It's just that... The person I'm in love with is someone I really shouldn't be in love with. Someone I care about loves them already," he whispered, ashamed of himself.

"So... a friend's girlfriend?"

"No, no... it's not even a..." he took a deep breath. "It's not even a girl."

"Oh," Emma said, understanding. "It's not a girl, it's a woman." She thought for a moment about the new chemistry teacher, a young, blonde thing. "Are you sleeping with a teacher?"

"What? No! He's not a teacher!" Finn exclaimed.

"Well then,what..." Emma thought for a moment. "You said 'he'. Is that the problem?"

"Sort of. That, and the age difference, and he doesn't even notice me that way," he sighed. "Not that he should. It would actually probably be kind of weird if he did..." Finn's voice trailed off.

Suddenly, the pieces clicked together in Emma's head. Another male, too old, and he had been very defensive when asked if it was a teacher.

"Finn, I need you to be completely honest with me." Finn nodded. "Look at me, Finn." Finn looked at her. "Are you having an affair with Mr. Schuester?"

"What? No! Are you serious? No! No, no, no!" he exclaimed.

"Okay, okay! Please stop shouting, Finn!" said the embarrassed guidance counselor.

"Sorry, I just... Oh my God, that's just... No, I am not having an affair with Mr. Schuester! That might actually be worse than being in love with Burt!" Finn's eyes widened as he clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Burt Hummel? Really?" Emma asked, shocked. Trying to regain some professionalism, she more calmly continued. "Is this mutual, Finn? Is Burt... touching you?"

"No, no," he said. "He isn't touching me. It isn't like that. He has no idea. It's just... when I was such a jerk to Kurt, even though he kinda deserved it for being so creepy, but I really shouldn't have used that word... Anyway, when I was such a jerk, Burt stood up for him, and I really respect that. And he's so good to my mom, which I just really admire. And he just gets me, you know? We can talk about like, football and cars and stuff for hours, and I kinda talked to him about some stuff that was going on with Rachel, and it's just awesome. I love him."

"You aren't in love with him, Finn. Or at least I don't think so." Emma scanned her rack of pamphlets before grabbing one. "Even so, here's a pamphlet that might help," she said as she slid a copy of "HELP! I'm In Love With My Stepdad" across her desk. "I think you just really respect and admire him, like a father. And you do love him... like a father. Okay?"

Finn nodded as a smile crept across his face.

"That's what it is. That's it. What a relief! I was kinda freaking out there, cause I'm... ya know... not gay."

"Glad I could help," Emma smiled. "Here, let me write you a note so you can go back to class..."

Told you it would be weird. Hope you liked :) Review if you want to. No pressure. But you should probably know that reviews are my lifeblood. Just sayin'.