That was that. By this time tomorrow, Derek would be on a plane, and on his way to New York. Nothing like Quantico. Once Strauss was out that door, my whole world turned upside down. It was like she has just sealed my fate, and Derek wasn't in it. Everything that I had had planned for us, was just torn apart, and ripped into pieces. Derek stood there, looking at me. Trying to find the right words to say, that would make me feel better. Make it seem like it wasn't going to end like this. But it was, and there was nothing that neither one of us could do about. The catch was that, even though it turned out like this, neither one of us would have changed a thing. We would still go to that club, we dance, kiss, and have that two month vacation, that changed our world.
Right now, it's just me and him. Looking at each other. Nothing could be said, that would make this better. So we just took each others hand, and walked out of the office together. Facing the other team members, they just stared at us. Each of them knowing what happened. Each of them feeling the pain that we were going through. Picking up both of our bags, we walked out of the BAU, still hand and hand. Tonight would be our night. Our final night together as a couple. Our final night together as team members. Our final night. At Derek's apartment, I sat my things at the door, and limped to the couch. Neither of us had said a word to each other since the talk with Strauss. I laid on the couch, and put my hand over my closed eyes. Maybe if I close my eyes long enough, and pray that this is all just a dream, then maybe it will be. I want to cry. I feel like my heart has just been ripped out of my chest.
That feeling that I had gotten once before. When it had all started to fall out of place. When my world was crashing down, and now it is again. Crashing right in front of me, and all I can do is cry. All I want to do is cry. Then I feel his hands. Hands that I may never feel again.. Hands that I will miss more than anything in this world. His hands. Derek's hands. "Pretty Boy." His whispers to me. I don't look at him. I'm afraid to, because then I know for a fact that I will cry. His hands run lightly rubbing over abdomen. "Look at me." I shake my head no. "Please?" He said, now in my ear. I turn to the side slowly, and open my eyes to look at him. He's holding back tears of his own. "Pretty Boy..." He looks at the floor, shaking his had lightly. "Don't think of this as a bad thing." 'How's this not a bad thing?' "Think of this as a test. A test to see if after everything we've been through in the past 3 months can survive the next 6 months ." He gave me his best smile, but it didn't fly. I reach of him, and hug him to me. We hugged each other softly because of my wounds.
"I don't want you to go. I just got you back. It's not fair." I couldn't hold the tears back anymore. "I don't want to leave you either Pretty Boy." I sniffled. "Then-Then don't leave me." He laughed out of spite. "You know I can't do that." I pulled away from him. "This isn't fair." He nodded his head in agreement. "I know it's not baby, but we have to." He whipped the tears from my eyes. Then lightly kissed my lips. "Come on. Let's go to bed." He helped me up, and we limped our way into the bedroom. Closing the door behind us, Derek helped me over to the bed. As we undressed, and laid into bed, I leaned my head against his chest. I wish this could last forever. "I'm going to miss you of every second of everyday Pretty Boy." He said, as he kissed my forehead. "Me too." I said, looking up at him. He ran his hands through my hair. I closed my eyes, and he kissed my lips. Not thinking, I kissed him back, with a little more force. I tried to savor this in my head. The feeling of his lips against mine, and how he tasted. The feeling of the love that he had for me that he hide behind each kiss. I didn't want to forget a moment of any of it. I wanted to put it in a folder in the back of my mind, so that I always had something to go back to.
Then he slowly pulled away. "I don't want to get too carried away here." He said, putting some distance between us. "I don't want to hurt your wounds." He said, as he put his hand back in my hair, and sighed. "Ah. Reid." I snuggled back up to him. Not needing him to finish what he was going to say. I shook my head. "Let's just hold each other like this until we fall asleep. It's enough for now." He kissed my forehead again, and we slowly drifted off. The next morning, was the day that I wished never came. We got up around 6 in the morning, to pack, and eat. Neither of us really speaking.
As we pulled up to the airport at 7:45, we sat in the car for a minute, still silent. Neither one of us wanted to say good-bye. "Well." Derek said, breaking the silence. "I guess this is it." I nodded my head. "I guess it is." I said, not looking at him. He nodded his head in agreement, and made his way out of the car. I got out as well, and watched him get his things. He put his bags down, and walked up to me. "Good-bye Spencer." He said, with a final hug.
Derek's POV
I guess he wants this to be as painless as possible. So guess if this is the last thing I can do for him for the next 6 months, then I owe him that much. So I get out the car, and get my bags. I look at the plane, and all I can think is, 'Damn Strauss!' But I did break the rules, so I'm partly responsible. But my punishment shouldn't be this. Our punishment shouldn't be this. I turn to look at Spencer to tell him bye one last time. He looks so hurt. I can see that he's tying to be strong for me, but it's killing hi inside. It's killing me too Pretty Boy. I give him a small smile, and hug him. "I'm going to miss you babe." I say, kissing his cheek. We hold each other for a minute. We don't have that much time left until the plane leaves. So I pull away from him, and kiss his forehead. I get my bags, and head for the plane. It feels like when I walked out on him the first time, when we broke up. That same hurtful feeling.
Then I hear him call my name. I turn my head, and I see him running awkwardly towards me. I drop my bags, and hug him to me. I kiss him with everything I have in me, and dig my hands in his hair. When I pull away from him, I can see that he's crying now. "I love you." He whispers to me, as he kisses me again. "I love you too." I say, kissing him back. I take a deep breath, and run my hands through his hair one final time. "Wait for me?" I say walking backwards towards the plane. He shakes his head, and smiles with tears running down his beautiful face. "Always." I nod my head, and turn to run to catch the plane. Once on it, and seated, I look out the window, and allow my tears to fall.