-Good news, I fixed this after uploading Chapter 5 (whoa, time compression? HAR). Before, there was a really minor line problem, it's fixed now. Apparently, you can't put in a really long pattern-line. Yeah, I only found that out now. -straight face-

Disclaimer: I do not own FFIX. If I did...Dagger would probably have one more summon.

I couldn't open my eyes, like it was glued shut. I was on a soft bed, filled with fluffy cushions and everything. Last thing I remember, I was on a cold, wooden floor. On a stage in Burmecia, where Burmecians crowded to watch a play, receiving a standing ovation. I heard someone call my name, someone familiar. She sounded like Freya. I wanted it to be, but I knew if it was, she wouldn't approve of my actions. Freya, I hope you'd hear me out. I don't want to go back; not yet.

"Zidane?" The one who I assumed was Freya put her hand on my shoulder, lightly shaking me. "Zidane, are you conscious?"

I groaned, trying to sit up. I put a hand to my head, feeling it was pounding. Opening my eyes, I see the following; Freya, Sir Fratley, a nice room, and Baku by the doorway, with Marcus and Blank behind him. I blinked a few times, a bit dizzy. Freya put both her hands on my shoulders, looking at me closely.

"Are you okay?"

"Ugh...yeah..." I groaned, managing to say that I was fine. Freya wasn't convinced; she made me lie back down. I saw Sir Fratley watching me, he seemed pretty concerned too. Baku and the others stayed by the door. Baku had that serious look on his face, like he was deciding on something. I hated it when he has that look, especially since he was looking at me.

"Just rest, Zidane." Freya said, having that slight look of authority. I just nodded my head and snuggled under the covers. Before I fell fast asleep, I saw Baku walk towards Freya, putting a hand on her shoulder and tell her something in a really soft tone.

Everything went black, and next thing I knew, I was in a deep slumber.

Freya couldn't stop looking at me, worried sick. I told her a million times I was fine. And that was only in the past hour. I could see she was curious, concerned and...sad. She seemed to always have that look, but it seemed different. It was like she doesn't know who I am anymore.

I finally cracked, curiosity breaking through.

"Where's Baku?" I asked, watching Freya move around.

"He...left." She said, pausing. "He thought it better you stayed here, Zidane. He told me I have to 'protect' you. Hide you if ever one of your friends swings by." She turned around, looking at me. "He said you seemed better off here, in Burmecia. Nothing was going to stress you out or anything."

"Oh." I nodded while feeling slightly betrayed he left me here. "What did he...tell you?"

"He told me everything I just told you...and that you had it rough, ever since you came back from the Iifa Tree..." I could feel her curiosity grow, bit by bit with each passing moment. Freya didn't seem like it, but when you just give her a hint of something you knew she would never guess, she would immediately be interested, but would try to hide it. Sometimes, she would be intrigued to force it out of you; try to come up with questions that would give her a good answer.

"Freya, admit it. You want to know."

She nodded silently, taking a seat on the bed. I gave her a slight nod signaling that I was about to start.

"How long have I been gone, Freya?"

"This is the eleventh month." She replied, looking down a little. "About to be a year for Garnet."

I paused. I was glad Baku asked her to not make me go back or anything. I found myself saying something unconsciously. "Freya, I don't want Dagger to see me like this—I don't think she can take it. As far as things go, I don't want anyone else to see me right now."

"Zidane, just tell me—what happened?"

"Well," I began. "It isn't a day I like to remember..."

The guilt felt like it was eating me alive. I stared down at Kuja; he was bleeding from a gash, the one I made from so much anger. He took so many lives, but...seeing him now, I wasn't sure if killing him was the right thing. Look at him; he's...helpless. He was bleeding to death, and more importantly, he was repenting. I couldn't just leave him to die, it was against my nature. But what was stopping me from helping him get up? Did I really just hate him for all the lives he took and that he couldn't replace them anymore? Or was it because he looked as though he was crying?

I think it was both.

"Brother...there's nothing for me here. I've said all I have to say. I just want to die in peace."

"Kuja..."

"I've caused so much pain...so much lives were lost. Brother, leave here. I do not want to see you die here with me. Go, I have not saved your life for nothing..." He said, laughing slightly to hide his tears. "I feel...like I've been rid of such a horrible feeling. In the end, I'm no better than a human."

I cursed at myself for taking such a long time to figure out what to do. I rummaged through my pockets, wishing we hadn't used all our healing items.

"Aha!" I pulled out a Hi Potion. What luck. I bent over Kuja and sprinkled some of the liquid onto his side, healing it just right. Enough to make the gash only a harmless cut. I practically shoved the bottle in his mouth, holding Kuja's head up a little, forcing him to drink it. He tried resisting but failed, drinking it all in the end. "Good." I said, smiling.

"Why...?"

"Because it's against my nature to abandon someone I know is still alive." I grinned at him, hoping he wouldn't try killing himself. He just lay limp in my arms, looking away. He was lighter than he should be, but, oh well, at least I don't have to exert too much effort in carrying him. I made him hang on to my back, so it's easier for both of us.

"Don't you have enough energy to walk?" I asked after a while, looking at his head resting on my shoulder. He was cooperative, hanging on to my back and all. I wanted to see what his expression was; being saved. But I couldn't, his hair covered his face. Damn. I wanted to rub it in that he was just like anyone else—he needed help at some points.

He didn't exactly reply immediately, he gave it just a few seconds before he spoke. "Not really..." he said, voice hoarse. "Not in this state..."

"Oh." I said simply, trying to hide the little bits of anger I still have against him. I was being nice to him considering he is my brother. Besides, would he really go on another rampage? How much more honest can someone get when he's dying and repenting for the wrongs he's done? I knew he wouldn't lie; especially now. I believe him, but what does he intend to do? Just live like nothing happened?

"You hate Garland, don't you?"

"Of course I hate Garland." I replied, extremely sour. "He's such a..."

I felt Kuja smirk, weakly. "Garland was probably like me, blinded by unwavering feelings. Negative feelings." He raised his head a little, looking at the light peeking through the roots and tendrils of the Iifa Tree. "It's almost as if that light is guiding us. Like...it's accepting me."

"Yeah. It's pretty, isn't it?"

"The Iifa Tree is dead, right?" Kuja asked, sudden.

"Duh. Why else would the Iifa Tree be so lifeless? You know, lifeless."

"Like that army of Black Mages I created..." He muttered, putting his head back down. "Like the eyes I see in every other genome, all the bodies that pile up from my own power." His voice grew softer and softer. "What else do I have to give, aside from such pain?"

"Happiness."

"What?"

"You can give happiness. Kuja, if you're 'no better than a human', just like me, then you can give happiness, too. It's simple. For you, though, maybe it would be quite hard." I grinned, thinking of ways Kuja could make others feel happy. Oh, what a silly thought, Kuja making people laugh. But if he's gonna be living around here, he might as well try, right? I kept walking, my grip on Kuja tight, thinking of little simple things he could pull off to make others happy. So he could change.

"You can teach people." I smiled. "You're a better actor than anyone I know. Hm, what else...? Oh, you can teach magic, too. Maybe to little mages-in-training. You're just gonna have to wear a cloak, to cover your identity."

"Are you suggesting I live my life in secrecy?"

"Not really, I mean, when you feel that people can handle the fact you're helping them, then maybe you can stop covering your identity." I paused. "You're just gonna have to warm up to Dagger and the others first. Especially Dagger and Freya."

"Your queen and that Burmecian?"

"Yeah." I said, smiling at the thought of Dagger.

"Another thing is to stop being so insulting and be a bit more humble. You can't go around bringing joy when you're also gonna brag about your talents, if that's what you call them." I teased, receiving a hit on the back and a faint laugh. He seemed to accept the ideas.

"I'll try."

"That's better."

We were resting in a little cave near Conde Petie, he was sleeping, obviously weak from everything. I couldn't blame him though, Dagger was pretty angry with him, summoning Bahamut and Ark. Freya gave it all she got, whirling her lance and jumping everywhere, Eiko went all out, too. Casting Holy and summoning Madeen at least five times. Amarant definitely packed a hard punch, Quina gave it his/her all, casting all of his/her strongest Blue Magic. There was of course Steiner, using Climhazzard against him, Vivi kept casting Doomsday and all of his strongest magic. I went into Trance, so you could figure how angry I was.

When we faced Necron, we were barely in shape. Wow, it's a miracle we came out of it alive.

I just watched him, deep in slumber. It was late, but I couldn't sleep. That, and I felt like I had to watch over Kuja, seeing how helpless he was just a few hours ago. He couldn't move, much less fight all those monsters. I had to face them all alone. Kuja sat at the sidelines, trying to cast magic. I told him not to, but he settled with the next best option; casting white magic. It was enough for me.

I stared out, the rain wouldn't stop falling, but it was getting weaker. It wasn't too cloudy, so I could still see the sky. It was pretty. I actually thought it would be harder to see Kuja as a brother, considering how he looked, especially when he was sleeping. He was like a little child who needed to be protected. I had to admit, he was really pretty, but...

I really couldn't see myself falling in love with him. As far as my imagination goes, I can only see us as brothers, nothing more, nothing less.

All my thoughts were in disarray. I couldn't arrange my thoughts, for a strange reason. It was like I couldn't comprehend the fact Kuja was repenting, he was sorry and was determined to be nice. It felt like a dream, but it was all happening. Kuja wanted to change himself while he still had the chance.

He was curled up, sleeping peacefully. I was sitting up, arranging my thoughts. Little by little, piece by piece. I recapped everything that happened, from childhood memories I still held dear to the day I found out who I was, my purpose, my family. The people I was supposed to call family. My creator, a heartless, cold blooded man who created the rest of my brothers and sisters for only one purpose. I was supposed to consider Garland my father. There was my little sister, Mikoto. She wasn't much of a fun person to talk to, but I suppose she would learn to live much like a human. Then, of course, Kuja.

I stared out the distance, waiting for the sandman to take pity and put me to sleep. It didn't take that long.

"Mina!" I shouted, waving frantically at the Prima Vista. They were flying considerably close to the ground, I only hoped that someone was at the deck, looking out at my direction. "Guys!" I called, trying again. I know it was sort of useless, but it's better to try, isn't it?

"Baku! Blank! Anyone?!"

"Zidane?" Kuja called sleepily. I turned back to see him rubbing the sleep from his eyes, yawning a little. He stood up straight and stretched his arms, looking at the Prima Vista along with me. "Is that your friends' airship?" The sleepiness was really evident in his voice, it really looked like he just woke up. He had the hair and everything. He wasn't the narcissist we all hated, he was just normal. The smudge of dirt he didn't bother rubbing off just sealed it.

"Yeah. It is." I said, watching it land, seeing someone's head pop out. It looked like Cinna. He looked back and called for the others. I couldn't hold my happiness; I just ran at them, screaming in joy like a moron who found his long lost puppy. I felt Kuja stay back and watch me run towards them with such joy. He must be ashamed to have me as a little brother.

"Guys! Oh my god, guys!" I was so happy, I could barely hold back tears of joy, as lame as it sounds. "I haven't seen you all in such a..." I trailed. Did I really need to tell them how I was feeling?

"Oh gawd...is tha'...?" Ruby gasped, pointing somewhere behind me and backing away. I laughed a little at her accent.

"No, he's fine..." I said, turning to Kuja. "He just needs a chance." He nodded hesitantly from afar. Could he really hear me, or was it because we were connected through our genes? I do have the same genetics as him, I'm just slightly modified, right?

He slowly walked closer, careful not to trip from sleepiness and little rocks. Kuja looked shy, for once, leaving them quite dumbfounded. I could read their faces: 'Since when was he shy?'. I had to admit, I was quite dumbfounded too.

"Hello..." Kuja said softly.

"Zi...Zidane...?" Baku managed to say. "What's he...why's he...why's he still alive?! I thought you killed him! I thought he..." He was lost, like he was unable to accept the fact he was still alive and kicking. He looked more scared than he was shocked.

"I saved him." I said, smiling. The short sentence made me feel happy. I don't know why myself, but it did. "Boss, I know he was pretty much the cause of a lot of destruction and all, but he's better now. He's...he's willing to change." I said, looking at Kuja over my shoulder. Baku seemed to sense the uncertainty in my voice and crossed his arms.

"I ain't belivin' this. This charades he's puttin' up."

"It's not a charades...!" I said, defending him. "Please just give him another chance...you don't have to forgive him." I said, about to go on my two knees, hands clasped together. "Please...I know you can't forgive him...but find it in your heart to let him come, please?"

"...that's about as many 'pleases' as I can take from ya." Baku sighed. Or rather, said sigh. He gave a sure nod with his arms crossed. My mouth hung open in happiness.

"Thanks, Boss...!"

"Just on one condition, Zidane." He uncrossed his arms and looked at me intently, eyes that looked like they were staring into my soul. It freaked me out a little, but I couldn't blame him. He continued. "The moment he acts suspicious, he is going to be thrown outta here, ya hear me? The moment I—any of us, see him plotting, he's gonna be thrown out. Hopefully from a really high place."

"You can't really mean—"

"I mean it both as a figure of speech and literally."

"Boss, you can't be—" I cut myself off. I knew what he was going to say. 'Have you forgotten just what he did? What he caused?'. I understood if they hated me for it, but I think it's worth it. Besides, if he does go crazy again, I'll make sure he's my problem. Not theirs.

"Doesn't sound like anything unfortunate happened..." Freya said, the curiosity in her voice dying. "But where's that Kuja, anyway, or did he...?"

"I know what you mean. None of what I bet you're thinking happened." I said. Freya tilted her head, confused by my words. I halfheartedly smiled.

"...something else did."