Chapter 5: Close

by the awesome guys of The BossHoss! Wonderful song, wonderful lyrics. Watch on YouTube, if you got the time. Fits perfectly for this chapter ;)

Warnings: hard language, mild sexual content.

Oh, and excuse me when I'm a bit too much into drooling-fangirl-mode at times... ^^ It's just... well... if Gwendal would be a real-life person, he would totally be my type :D If I recall the day when my friend brought the mangas over – I looked at the cover of the first volume, spotted Gwendal and was like: „Yay, awesome! This guy has got long hair 3" I love long-haired guys :3

Yuri sighed relieved when the meeting was finally over and they were back in their room. Of course, after the meeting there had been a formal ball, and – of course – the king's escort was supposed to dance with him... the thought of that dance, of being so very close to the tall, handsome demon lord, smelling his typical scent, looking into his eyes - still made him blush and shiver at the same time.

„I'm glad that everything went so well," he looked at Gwendal, who stood by his side. His figure in his gala uniform was simply gorgeous, Yuri thought dreamily.

„Yes, me too. You did a great job."

The boy smiled at the compliment he was given. „Thank you, it means very much to me that you're saying this."

Gwendal just walked into the room, closing the door behind Yuri afterwards. The latter sighed quietly. He couldn't suppress a slight feeling of disappointment, for he had hoped for just some kind of response, now that he had dared to say something that bold.

„By Shinou, am I tired..." the king switched the topic. Yawning, he went to the bathroom to change into his pajamas.

„Even though you slept until lunchtime today?" the general asked him amused as he followed him.

„Yup," the boy yawned again. Gwendal chuckled softly at seeing this, which gave Yuri a flustered feeling in his chest again.

If he just could figure out what the older man felt. Since they had left for their trip, various things had become pretty normal between them – the implicitness how they touched each other in daily life, which brought the hair tie event to his mind and not at least, also todays dance. Then, there was the relaxed way of their dialogs, how they just understood each other. When Yuri remembered the first day he had spent in Blood Pledge Castle, remembered Gwendal's deprecative attitude towards him, he had never thought that he would get along so well with the grim-looking, but actually not so fierce general.

He didn't know if the dark-haired demon would ever return his feelings, but if only the slightest hope for that was warranted, then he would hope. Didn't having a crush on someone always mean to hope? Didn't it mean to just love and want to be with the other one, no matter what happened? There was certainly a huge amount of thoughts he had to push aside – thoughts of Wolfram and their engagement, mostly.

But in the end, Gwendal's behavior towards him made him wonder.

Quickly, they had changed and were ready for bed. The dark-haired mazoku slipped under his sheets, followed by Yuri, who still pondered if he would get the chance to sleep in the other one's arms again. Besides enjoying the mere physical contact and closeness, he had a bad feeling that he wouldn't get any sleep if he didn't. Shyly the king eyed the man at his side, waiting for a sign or a wink to invite or encourage him. But he earned nothing but an intense glance of those wonderful indigo eyes. How was he supposed to know what that meant?

He was nervous and didn't dare to ask. It would just sound stupid anyway. In that case, he would sleep on his side of the bed, as they had intended originally.

Rolling around and turning his back at the man, he quietly said: „Good night, Gwendal."

„Good night, Yuri," came the whispered answer. And was that retained disappointment he heard?

I just misinterprete things for sure. There had been several occasions that day where he thought Gwendal acted strange. When he had been talking to King Saralegui for quite a while and seemingly too long in the eyes of the other one, the general had shown up out of nowhere to introduce him to a new politician of Franceshire. But Yuri had got the point that he was only supposed to get away from the young royal. For whatever reasons, the boy couldn't tell if it was the general's feeling of responsibility for his king or... jealousy. Because that was what it felt like in the first place - and oddly enough it had felt incredibly good.

And that was just one example.

He pondered about it, turning from one side to the other. How should this ever end up? Of course, he hoped that Gwendal would feel the same for him, but wasn't that too much to expect? Way too much to expect? The tall demon was also his current fiancé's brother. Yuri didn't want to imagine Wolfram's reaction when it would get that far for real. No matter which way this turned out, how was he supposed to look into the blonde's eyes ever again? Under the current circumstances? He felt ashamed.

Because on the other hand, he was undeniably in love with Gwendal. Yuri had never imagined that the tall, dark general would one day be his first love. He couldn't imagine confessing his love to him. When he thought about that matter, he had always thought that he would one day kneel before a smart, beautiful young lady, begging for her hand.

The image of him kneeling before Gwendal, asking Cherié-sama for his hand, almost made him smile. It was just too ridiculous.

And there was still Anissina, whom he forgot about pretty often lately. He still didn't know what kind of relationship the one between her and Gwendal was. Or what she wanted it to be.

Turning around again he looked into the moon, his other companion, which he had also come to love during those sleepless nights. It was just like he had feared, actually he couldn't sleep. But he couldn't wake Gwendal now, that would be unfair and selfish. And what should he tell him? At least the older mazoku would be asleep by now for sure. Sighing, he buried his head into his pillow.

Suddenly, he felt the mattress shake under his body. Looking over his shoulder, the king tried to figure out was was happening.

But he didn't have much time to think until the situation explained itself. A strong, muscular arm was wrapped around his waist, a long, heavy leg trapped his underneath it. The cozy, familiar warmth of Gwendal's body was spreading over his back while the man's scent was flowing around him. Silently, he smiled to himself and allowed his hand to rest upon his general's larger one. His own palm seemed tiny and fragile against it. He nuzzled the big hand softly anyway, grateful for the other one's empathy.

Moments later, he fell asleep.

Yuri closed his eyes immediately after opening them for the first time the next morning. He didn't want this moment to go by. He wanted to just lay in this spot forever, cradled in Gwendal's arms, warmed by the other one's body, smelling that manly, herbal fragrance around him. The best sleeping pill ever to be invented.

The sun was rising again and though the general was still sleeping – at least the boy thought so because of the regular breaths onto his neck, which made him shiver – he knew once they stood up today, they had to leave and travel back to Shin Makoku.

And that meant business as usual. Not the trip, but afterwards. At home.

Morning jogs with Conrad, Lessons with Gunter, paperwork with Gwendal and sleeping in one bed with Wolfram.

The opportunity of these sleeping customs with Gwendal would forever be gone and never occur again. Yuri didn't know how their accommodation during the travel would be, but he was sure that a double bed would never be included, not in any way. And who was he that he would knock at the other one's door in the middle of the night, begging to share the bed with him?

Well, apart from that, it also sounded just... wrong. If he thought it over like this.

Physical contact with Gwendal had gotten so enjoyably normal over the past days. But when they would be back home, the king knew well enough what Wolfram would say – rather shout – at him if things like that happened. Like, maybe, the situation with the tie the day before.

But when we would be at home, I also wouldn't be the one Gwendal would ask to do this for him. It would be Gunter.

It hurt deep in his chest to know that.

A heavy sigh escaped his lips as his hand absently caressed the man's, which still lay around his waist. His fingertips brushed along the larger palm of the other one, running up and down, and he could feel the rough skin of the slender, long fingers under his digits. He tried to remember everything of that very moment, to treasure it in his heart, as much as it hurt though.

Yuri gasped for air when he suddenly felt pulled backwards, closer to the tall mazoku's body, which resulted in Gwendal's face buried in his hair. The boy could feel the warm breath nuzzling through his black hair, down onto his neck, where it caused goosebumps. Apparently, he was used as a teddy bear here – which he didn't mind at all.

By god, this man was really good at getting him off guard and throwing him off balance. He felt his cock twitch in sympathy and again, all he hoped was that Gwendal wouldn't notice. No matter if he was asleep or not currently.

The next moment, he was shown clearly that the dark-haired demon was not sleeping any more.

„Good morning, heika," a deep, vibrating voice mumbled into his hair.

„Good morning, Lord von Voltaire," he answered provocatively, which was followed by a small whimper of the man at his back. He shifted his body slightly.

A soft sigh accompanied the response. „Yuri..."

And goosebumps, again. Yuri thought he was dying by the crazy butterflies in his stomach, and not at last, the heavy, aching erection throbbing between his legs. Gwendal's morning voice was unbelievably sexy, even more in the current position. The full body contact was almost getting the boy dizzy.

As he shifted slightly in his place, trying to be as near as possible to the other one in those last minutes, he noticed something he hadn't thought of. That Gwendal was also just a man like himself, of course. And men had, completely normally, a morning wood.

It didn't help to feel that on his back in his current state.

Yuri tried to breath as slowly and regularly as before, tried to ignore the hot, boiling feelings in his neither regions, tried to suppress his raging libido which spread through his whole body at an unstoppable rate. This didn't mean anything. This was a usual, physical reaction and had nothing to do with him. However, telling himself so didn't help much.

„So we have to leave today," he tried to dub his nervousness.

„Mhm," came a lazy answer from the back of his head, causing another vibrating feeling down his spine. And nothing more. The general didn't move a single inch. He really doesn't make things easier that way.

The boy closed his eyes and attempted to just wait and enjoy. It didn't work – again - because at occasions like this, the only thing that came to his mind was the dream of the night before. Yuri silently cursed his perverted post-puberty mind for not being able to focus on something that hadn't got anything to do with sex.

He turned around to face his companion, so that at least he wouldn't feel that any more.

The general's eyes glared intense and innocent at him. Didn't he realize...?

„Have you slept well?" he was asked softly by the dark-haired mazoku.

„Yes, I have. Very well indeed."

„I'm happy to hear that," Gwendal answered amused. So he certainly knows by now that I can only sleep in his arms... great. I shouldn't have got used to that with Wolfram. Though he didn't know if the blonde's embraces would ever be a respectable substitute for this again, without all this physical attraction, sexual tension and that flustered feeling.

Blushing deeply, Yuri rolled onto his belly. It was a little painful, but better than Gwendal noticing his current state. The general got the hint and left the bed, which almost made the boy regret his move. But they would have to get up anyway sooner or later. He watched the man carefully from the corner of his eye as the latter got to his feet and stretched while yawning and rubbing his eyes. When he lifted his hands to his eyes, the lower part of his abdomen was revealed by the shirt that slit up with the movement. Just that tiny bit of exposed skin, hiding a well notable six-pack of toned muscles, drove the king almost crazy, making him want to throw off Gwendal's clothes, wanting to see him laying on the bed, naked, and god knew what he would do to the older one then... Yuri buried his face into his pillow at his dirty thoughts, feeling embarrassed.

He finally relaxed when he heard Gwendal head to the bathroom.

The two days on the ship had passed by way too fast and without any incidents. Just like during the outward journey, they had been chatting about all the world and his brother, discussing serious like less serious matters or playing simple board games. Yuri just had fun enjoying Gwendal's presence. He smiled to himself. Who would ever have thought that?

Also, he felt much more respected by the general, for various reasons. Not only had their conversations about politics and his opinions on that been interesting for his companion, but he also had the feeling that he was much better understood now. Gwendal was listening to him, as if he wasn't the older and much more experienced person. Yuri felt simply honored.

And thinking of the two nights on the ship made him still blush. The general had both nights been in in his bed before him, leaving him the option to crawl up into the upper stock bed or to slip under the other one's sheets by lifting the blanket and watch him invitingly. The decision had been easy for him, of course. Gwendal took it with a relaxed grin and a tender glance in his eyes that the king was snuggling into his arms every evening.

When their travel reached the final stage, the king almost was a bit melancholic looking at the past days. He knew that things would never be the same again. These days had been a wonderful dream which he was granted to experience, but it would end soon.

Now that they only had two days on the carriage laying in front of them, expecting to arrive at Blood Pledge Castle during the following day, Yuri could no longer hide the fact that he had to do something.

It was already late afternoon and they sat in the carriage in pleasant silence after a long conversation. The boy used the situation to his advantage to glance at the general whenever it wasn't too obvious. And the hard part was that he knew that watching was all he could do from now on, if he didn't tell Gwendal what was up with him. That he had feelings for him, that he was in love with him. Watching would be the only option if he kept his mouth shut, along with pretending to be engaged to Wolfram some more. Living a lie, in the end.

On the other hand, how could he confess his love for the dark-haired mazoku. How dared he to love his fiancé's big brother. Not only would he risk their new-founded friendship, but also the relationship between the brothers. He didn't even want to think about what happened when Wolfram would find out about all this. And Anissina, of course. He really didn't want to think about her and her supposed aim as well.

The worst case was obvious. If Gwendal just looked at him bluntly, telling him that he couldn't return his feelings. A sharp, painful stroke hit Yuri's heart at that thought.

Though he couldn't deny that the tall man's behavior throughout the past days had really raised his hopes. Not only their silent deal of sleeping customs, but also the situation with the ponytail and the tie and the dance... and not at least their endless dialogues and even Gwendal's occasional laughs, which were always something special. He felt honored for being the one who caused them.

But nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? If he told him now, there were two options, a Yes or a No by the man. If Yes, they could think over what they should do next and they would be happy. If No, then he could at least beg him to not tell anyone and try to overcome most of his heartsickness during the next day.

Either way, if he told the general or not, he would never be able to act straight in his presence again.

Yuri knew he had to, it was better that way, and the perception made him flustered and nervous beyond compare. He had never felt this way. Well, he had never confessed his love to someone. Where should he begin? Countless scenes from animes or movies came to his mind, clichèd and cheesy ones, and none of them appropriate for his situation.

His gaze fell on Gwendal, who had obviously watched him for quite a while, lost in thought. His heart skipped a beat as his eyes locked with shining, indigo ones. How should he manage to say a single word like this? His stomach felt turned upside down, his face gleaming most likely in the deepest shape of red, his hands were sweaty and trembling from nervousness.

„Gwendal..." Yuri began, his voice shaking even worse than his hands, „I-"

He was interrupted by the most unromantic thing he could think of. The sound of unsheathed swords. Something was wrong. Gwendal immediately got to his feet as the carriage came to an abrupt halt.

„Later, Yuri," he said as he left through the door. „Please stay here and wait for me."

The boy took a careful look through the curtains. What he saw worried him even more. Wild, loud battle cries were heard around the carriage, the sound of swords crashing together, the whuzzing sound of arrows flying by. Apparently, they had run into an ambush and were attacked by a group of robbers. He saw Gwendal unsheathing his sword and jump at one of the attackers, felling him in no time.

The other men of Gwendal's squad were also fighting hard already, though the group wasn't big. With a short glance around, Yuri thought it had to be about 15 men, though he knew he might not see everyone of them. Either way, the von-Voltaire-squad was well-educated and experienced, so the robbers were quickly reduced to a few men who decided to take to their heels.

Yuri watched the general as he put his sword in his usual spot back into its sheathe, rubbing his hands contented. But as he turned around, the boy noticed something from the corner of his eye. Just a glimpse of the sunlight reflecting on a sparkling something. And before he could figure out what it was or before he was even able to warn Gwendal, he saw a fast projectile fly towards the man.

The next moment, the dark-haired mazoku fell forward onto the ground, hit by an arrow that stuck deep in his arm. Yuri jumped out of the carriage in no time.

„Gwendal!" he shouted shocked, running towards his companion to fall on his knees before him. „Gwendal, stand up!"

The latter turned his head around, coughing heavily with his face drawn to a painful expression. It hurt Yuri to see him like that, as his proud, strong warrior tried to regain his self-control.

„Yuri," he panted, „you should have stayed in the carriage! It's not safe here! Why did you not-"

„I don't care! Are you alright?" he felt tears welling up in his eyes but tried to hold them down.

„I'm fine, it's just the arm. But you should... please-"

That moment, Yuri heard that whuzzing sound again, but just for a moment. Then a sharp, piercing pain spread through his chest and he felt warm blood spill out into his chemise and jacket. As he looked down, he saw a red-feathered arrow stuck in his chest. He laid his hand on it, which led to even more pain. He couldn't believe this was real. His sight began to dim.

When he looked up to see where the arrow had come from, he noticed several of Gwendal's men pulling a bowman out of a bush in the distance. Immediately after that, he saw that man's head rolling through the dusty street.

And Gwendal. Gwendal had sat up, looking at the boy's chest in shock, his eyes snapped wide open.

The last thing Yuri heard was the deep voice he had come to love so much.

„Nooo! Yuri!" it cried.

The last he saw were those wonderful, intense, indigo eyes, who looked terrified down at him.

Then everything turned black.

Pretty heavy chapter, I know – now I hope you understand the title. It almost crosses the line twice... ;)

That was actually one of the basic ideas for this story. I always wanted to write it since the day I began with the story and – well, let's see what's up next.

Stay tuned :) And if you want – I still hope for some reviews!