A/N t&a: Sooo, here is where the M rating comes in for real. we won't blabber but to say thank you, thank you, thank you as usual—you're all amazing and beautiful and totally fucking fabulous.

We don't own. Even though we wish we did. Because they would've done the dirty in book 1.

So now I'm feelin' alright
Cause nothing feels like
When you're holding on.
I wanna treat you like you wanna be treated
And I wanna see you like you wanna be seen.
"Holdin' On" Citizen Cope

From: ItsASecret

To: BSwan

Subject: Ransom

Bella,

Meet me at the corner of 1st and Jones at 7:30 tonight.

Don't tell anyone where you're going and don't bring anyone with you or I'll delete your Facebook account.

Sincerely,

You'll Know Who Later

x

I grin, hit send and slide away from the computer. That should give her something to think about for a little while. I want to take her out on a date. I want to feed her desert and drink wine and watch her eyes sparkle in candlelight. I want to see her smile. I want her to blush because she feels special.

I want her to have everything.

All of the plans for tonight are set. Finn is with Savannah. The dogs are with Emmett. There won't be any distractions. Tonight is going to be all about Bella.

I didn't expect the transition from single to not single to go as smoothly as it has. I expected to be turned off at the idea of being tied down—Finn and the bar seemed like more than enough responsibility. But there's nothing unappealing about my relationship with Bella. In fact, what I expected to hate about it—that is, having another person to tend to—is probably one of the things I like most about it.

Not that she's a chore but because she relies on me and I rely on her. It's just… really nice.

Granted, putting an e in her tattoo probably wasn't the greatest or most rational way of going about expressing the way I feel about her. Momentary lapse in judgment. That's not to say that I don't think it's the hottest fucking thing to have ever been tattooed on a person's body. Then again, my opinion's biased.

x*x

I lean back against the brick building with my hands in my pockets and look around for Bella. She responded to my e-mail earlier and asked what she should wear. I said nothing.

She comes striding down the sidewalk in a black dress that should be called simple but just isn't. It falls to the middle of her thighs and hugs the curve of her hips casually. The neckline is a simple scoop but makes her collarbone look more pronounced and her neck longer. And her face is framed by soft, wavy strands of chocolate hair.

She hasn't seen me yet. Her thumb is between her teeth. She looks unsure and honestly, was she really not entirely sure that that e-mail was from me? Because I'm going to need to send her to a class on Using the Internet Safely if that's the case.

Finally she spots me. Her eyes brighten and a slow smile lights up her face. Everything about her is so fucking beautiful.

When she's finally standing in front of me, I put my hands on her hips and smile at her. "Hi."

"Thank god it's you. I was pretty sure but there's always the off chance…" She takes a deep breath. "Hi."

"You should be more careful." The idea of anything happening to her because she's so sweet and naïve has my heart skipping a beat.

"I will. I am. I was 97 percent sure it was you. I really, really wanted it to be." She takes her thumb into her mouth again before leaning up and pressing her lips to mine.

I smile again and tuck a piece of hair behind her ear. "You look beautiful," I say and kiss her again. We're going to be late but I can't help myself when her lips are all shiny and pink. "Really, really beautiful. I should take you home and keep you all to myself."

She grins. "Are those your big plans? Have me meet you on a street corner just to take me back home?" she asks with a laugh.

I roll my eyes and take her hand in mine, tugging her down the street. "Let me assure you, if my plans were to meet you here and take you home, there wouldn't be anything small going on."

She chuckles and I'm glad I'm being so entertaining tonight. "Do I get to know these plans or are they still a secret? I'm a mean secret keeper."

"That's definitely great news," I tell her with a nod. "But it's still a secret."

Her arms goes around my waist and she snuggles up next to me. "I was really surprised. The best kind of surprised. I love that you did this."

"You have no idea what my plans are," I say ominously. "For all you know I could be taking you on a romantic walk through a cemetery."

She gives me her best bitch brow which I have to fight hard not to laugh at because there really isn't a mean bone or muscle in this girl's body. "Maybe I would like that." She pauses. "Who am I kidding? I would hate that. I'm the worst with scary movies and anything that looks like a scary movie set."

I laugh and guide her down a side street before stopping on a dock. Tied to the dock is a canoe. There's a picnic basket inside and a small battery operated stereo. The lake water is still and sparkling with the rays of what's left of today's sun. "Here we are," I say as we stop right next to where the canoe is tied up.

Bella looks between me and the canoe several times before launching herself at me and kissing me hard. I laugh against her lips at her enthusiasm and wrap my arms around her tightly.

"I'm going to get in first and keep it steady for you to climb in, okay?" I ask and squeeze her ass once under her dress before letting her go.

"I've never been in a canoe, but they seem so all American. We're not going to tip over, right?"

I laugh and step onto the boat. "This thing is really hard to tip. But it's just water anyway," I say with a shrug and hold my hand out to her. "Come on over here." She puts her hand in mine and steps hesitantly down onto the small boat. "You okay?" I ask once I've rowed us away from the dock.

"Yeah, this is amazing. I had no clue you were so… canoey."

I laugh and steer us towards the center of the lake at a lazy pace. "I don't think that's a word."

"Well, the point is, I'm impressed. And a little wooed. If that was the point."

I kick my shoes off and run my toe up her calf. "I might've been going for more than just 'a little wooed.' But we've got time," I tell her and give her a crooked smile. "How was your day today?"

She laughs and swats my foot away. "The same as every day, nothing of note, until I saw you."

The smile on my face widens. "I love that about you."

Her eyes widen and she swallows hard. "You and Finn are my highlights. I love that about the two of you. You make my life exciting, mentionable."

I put the paddles down and then wrap my hands around her ankles and pull her feet into my lap. I rub the soles of her feet with my thumbs for a minute before answering her. "You've always been mentionable, Bella." I press in a little harder with my thumbs. "Always."

She grins a shy, beautiful smile. "You should write greeting cards—you have the prettiest words."

I mock frown at her. "Greeting cards?" I shake my head. "Greeting cards inspired by B Swan. 'I'm so glad you were born. You have the tastiest pussy in the world.' You think that would work?"

She laughs loudly and kicks her feet a little bit. "I hardly think your Average Joe will want to give that to his sweetheart, but I wouldn't mind. Give it a shot."

I shrug. "I think it'd be a successful business venture. Are you hungry?"

"That depends… hungry for what?" she asks and lifts one eyebrow at me.

My eyes widen and if I wasn't sitting down, I'd probably fall on my ass. My shy little Bella just made a suggestive comment to me. I clear my throat and shrug again. "Anything. Whatever you want." And my voice is lower, deeper than I expected it to be.

She smirks shyly at me. "I think since we're on a lake, in public, I'll go with food for now. With the option of more, for later."

I laugh and reach down for the basket. "Elaborate on that," I say as I start pulling food from inside the basket.

She chews on her nail a little bit and I fight back my smile. "Well, it's always good to eat before having dessert—energy and everything. It seems to be quite strenuous most of the time."

"Having dessert you mean?" I ask and quirk an eyebrow at her. "Is a strenuous activity? Or are you talking about something else?"

"Figurative dessert," she says and huffs out an annoyed breath. "I hardly work up a sweat eating a cupcake. You know, the good stuff."

Christ, I love her like this. All forward but not forward. Using cupcakes to insinuate that she wants to have sex with me. Or… whatever, I don't know if she wants to have sex but I'm down to do whatever she wants to do. And I love hearing her tell me. "When I tell you, slide all the way over to the right, okay?"

She gives me a questioning look and then nods. I start to get ready to stand, nod to tell her to move over and then sit down next to her. "Is the view better of here?" she asks.

The boat rocks gently under our weight and Bella puts her hand on my thigh to steady herself. I cover her hand with mine before draping my arm around her. "I was getting a little cold over there."

She chuckles and leans slightly into me. "And I'm your blanket? That's a new role for me."

"I definitely wouldn't mind you laying on top of me."

x*x

I'm nervous. Isn't that a fucking trip? As if I'm the one losing my virginity tonight. Or, at least, hopefully losing my virginity tonight. But I'm not losing my virginity at all so I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. I'm nervous though. My palms are sweaty and I think my tongue is swollen because every time I try to speak it comes out all jumbled and fucked up and I sound like I'm drunk.

This is fucking ridiculous. I'm supposed to be the one in control. I'm supposed to be the one that's going to make this a really fucking good first time for her. And I can hardly keep my hands from shaking. What kind of man touches a woman with shaking hands? What if I jerk in the wrong fucking direction and hurt her?

But I feel like so much is riding on this. This is Bella. Awkward, beautiful Bella who says things like intercourse and walks for a mile with my kid on her back. My Bella. I should've had a drink. If I fuck this up then what? There's no round two to taking someone's virginity. There's no do-over. There's no, "Hey, baby, practice makes perfect so if this sucks we can try again tomorrow."

"Unless your door is a clap open, I'm pretty sure you need to use the key."

I jump when Bella's hand runs down my back. Maybe she can take me out shopping for thongs and tampons after I totally fuck this up since I'm acting like a fucking thirteen year old girl about to go on her first date. Do thirteen year old girls even go on dates?

I look down into her slightly worried, slightly amused eyes and shake my head. "Sorry, what'd you say?"

She laughs, kisses my shoulder and uses her own key to open the door. "Where are you? You're all wrapped up in some story in your head."

I shake my head and follow her into the empty apartment. "Ah, nothing." I smile at her and lock the door behind me before kicking off my shoes. "So, what do you wanna do?"

"No more grand plans? Was I supposed to plan something?" she asks through wide eyes with a small, coy smile.

I wrap my hand around the back of her neck and lean down to press my forehead to hers. "I figured we could just play it by ear at this point."

"I like playing it by ear," she whispers and tilts her head up slightly. "I have very good pitch."

I grin. "Is that so?" I ask and rub my nose against hers, tangling all of my fingers in her hair. "What's your ear telling you right now?"

She swallows and slides her eyes shut slowly. "On track I think," she says and leans up a little bit before pressing her lips to mine.

I drop my hands to her hips and pull her body towards mine, letting her lead the kiss for now. Her tongue darts out and probes at my lips so I open for her. She swipes inside of my mouth before pulling away and licking a line up my jaw. I groan, tighten my hold on her and walk us towards my bedroom.

I press her up against the wall right next to the bedroom door and rake my teeth down her throat before lifting my mouth to hers again. This time my tongue goes into her mouth.

I pull back and put my hands on either side of her face. "Do you know how badly I fucking want you?" I ask her and my voice is low and sort of raspy. "You're going to have to tell me now if you want this. I'm not gonna be able to stop if we go any further."

"Yes," she whispers with a nod. "This is so much better when I'm not drunk." She looks down for the last part, mumbling the end of it.

I grin and wrap my hands around her thighs and hoist her up so that she's pressed between my body and the wall. I rub my cock against her. "I told you it would be."

I leave warm kisses all over her face before taking her mouth again. She writhes against me and rubs her chest against mine.

"Sshh," I mumble against her lips when she moans and starts writhing even more frantically. "Let's take our time." I can't take my time, I can't take my time. I have to take my fucking time. I wrap my arms tightly around her and turn towards the bed, setting her down on it.

She looks up at me and touches my face as I lean down and wrap my fingers around the hem of her dress. "I just want you," she says softly. "However it feels right."

I groan before I even realize I'm going to and run the backs of my fingers down her cheek. "You're sure, right?" I ask and crawl on top of her until she lies back on the bed.

"If I knew other languages, I would tell you yes in them too."

And that's as much confirmation as I need. I kiss her again, sucking on her lower lip as I fumble to unlatch her bra. I rub my cock against her belly and tug the straps of her bra down. I feel desperate and frantic and like there isn't enough time to do everything I want to do to her, with her.

"I want you so badly," I mumble and drag my lips down her neck. "Every minute of every day." I pull her bra away and throw it across the room before taking one hard nipple in my mouth, sucking on it hard.

She cries out and buries her fingers in my hair as she arches up towards me. I knead the other one with my hand, tugging and pinching her nipple until she's moaning and writhing beneath me. I switch sides, giving equal attention to her other tit before dragging my mouth down her belly.

"You're so beautiful," I tell her as I tug her underwear down her legs. "And you taste so good, Bella."

With one hand on the inside of each knee, I press her legs open. I lick my lips before lowering my head and pressing my mouth to her, slipping my tongue inside of her. Her hips buck and her fingers fist in my hair, holding me tightly to her.

I lift my head and look up the length of her body. Her head is tilted back, her eyes are squeezed shut and her bottom lip is between her teeth. "I want you to be mine," I say gruffly and climb back up her body, shedding clothes as I go.

She wraps her arms around me and says, "I already am."

I fit my thighs in between hers and rest my cock between the wet folds of her pussy. "You have to tell me if this hurts." She nods with her eyes shut. "Bella," I say firmly and wait until she looks at me. "If it hurts tell me."

She bites down on her lip and nods up at me. I roll a condom on and position myself at her entrance. "Just relax, okay?" I lean down and kiss her, bracing most of my weight on one elbow as I use my other hand to guide my cock inside of her.

She's so fucking tight. Jesus Christ. When I'm halfway in I realize that I'm not breathing and that her eyes are squeezed up so tightly her lids are wrinkled.

"Bella." Her name comes out like a gust of air. "Are you okay?"

She nods without opening her eyes or even relaxing her lids. "Bella, baby, please stop making that face," I groan. "You look like you're giving birth to a hippopotamus."

She opens her eyes and takes a couple of breaths before smiling at me. "I'm good. Promise."

I nod and pull out slightly before pushing back into her. There's no resistance and for some reason I remember her comment about popping her cherry on a bike and I want to laugh but I think if I take my focus off of not pounding into her and losing my shit, this'll be over a lot faster than I want it to be.

Once I'm fully inside of her, I don't move. This takes a lot more effort than I ever thought it would. "How are you doing?" I ask because she's back to squinching her eyes shut and biting down on her lip.

She runs her hands over my face and then down my back. "I want you too. I want this with you," she whispers. "Keep going."

I pull out and then slide slowly back inside of her. And mother fuck she's tighter than anything I've ever felt before. Tighter and warmer and wetter and I'm going to lose my shit like a fourteen year old boy no matter how hard I try not to.

"Jesus, Bella," I groan and press my face into her neck. "You feel so good." I slide in and out of her and her walls clench around me. "So, so fucking good, baby."

I press my lips to hers and reach between us to rub her clit. I need her to come. I'm not going to last very much longer. "Bella," I groan against her lips. "Can you come for me, sweetheart?"

She bites down on her lip with enough force to turn the sensitive skin white. And I know what her answer's going to be. If it were possible, I'd kick myself in the balls to hold off my orgasm.

"I can't," I groan. "I can't wait. You feel too good."

She leans up and takes my earlobe between her teeth before whispering, "I wanna feel you come, please."

She said please. Fuck. I squeeze my eyes shut and press my forehead to hers. Every thrust makes me feel like an asshole but I can't hold it back anymore. I come with a low, grumbling moan inside of her and then basically, like a good for fucking nothing oaf, collapse down on top of her.

"I'm sorry," I whisper against cheek. "If that sucked. I'm sorry."

She kisses each of my cheeks and then my lips. "It did not suck. At all."

I pull out of her even though I don't want to do anything but sleep right now. "You're going to come for me, Bella." I slide off of the bed and throw the condom in the trash before climbing back on top of her. "Over and over again." And then I slide back down between her legs.

I spread her out wide and take her clit between my teeth before flicking it with my tongue. She cries out and arches her back, hips bucking off of the bed and against my face. "Edward," she groans.

"Touch yourself," I tell her and then flick my tongue against her clit again as I slide two fingers inside of her, twisting and pressing against her G-spot.

I watch as she takes her tits in her hands and groan as she pinches and rolls her nipples. The vibration of my groan obviously sets her off because she starts thrashing and crying out.

"That's it, baby," I mumble and pump my fingers faster in and out of her. "Come for me."

"Edward," she whimpers over and over again, watching me through half shut eyes and then her body tenses as her orgasm takes her.

She drops limply into the bed, chest heaving with her eyes shut. I crawl back up and pull the covers down around her. I press kisses to her collarbone, up her neck and then all over her face. "Come under the covers with me," I whisper and rub my cheek against hers.

She mumbles incoherently and I smile lazily against her face. When we're finally under the covers I pull her tightly against me. "It'll be better next time," I tell her.

She snuggles even closer and takes my face in her hands. "That was exactly what I wanted. And I hope there are lots of next times."

"Are you sure?" I tease even though her words ease my anxiety. "You're not gonna go and complain to your Alice about how I couldn't get you off?"

She rolls her eyes and I laugh. "Here, this, us is not for anyone else. This part of the story is special." She kisses me sweetly.

I tighten my arms around her. "And I guess I did get you off, huh?"

She nods into my neck and starts to scratch my back. "It was perfect. Perfect for us. So much better than having someone else's artificial moment."

"Good. Can you do that until I fall asleep?"

"As long as you want. Forever if you'll let me."

I grin and hug her tighter before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Good night, Bella."