Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, we would all be in serious trouble.

Warnings: This fic has bad language. Virgin ears be warned!

Chapter 11: Your Sex is on Fire

Hinata was never much of one for laughing. It just wasn't her thing. If she ever expressed amusement so openly, it was normally with a small smile and soft giggle. That was it.

That was the main reason why anyone who knew her would be shocked to walk into her Child Development class on Friday during fourth period and hear her raucous laughter ringing out, louder than anything that had left her mouth in years. She really couldn't help it, though. Josh was just... he was so funny.

Trying to stifle her laughter when the teacher finally began looking her way, she covered her mouth and cleared her throat harshly. She really should get herself under better control.

Josh, smiling broadly at his success with the very shy girl, leaned in with a grin of his own. "Y'know, I'm having a party tonight at my place. Parents are out of town. You should stop by."

Hinata's face turned about twelve shades of red. Had he really just invited her to a party? Her? "Ano... that..." She almost said yes. Part of her really wanted to say yes, to go simply because it was him who asked her... but in the end she politely declined. She had already made plans with Sakura, just like every other Friday night. Besides, a party? A bunch of drunk upperclassmen dancing to ridiculously loud music, stuffed into an overcrowded room, practically groping each other in the open? That really was not Hinata's scene. No matter how amazingly blue Josh's eyes were.

Dattebayo!

Naruto all but ran to the waiting SUV, yelling an impatient, "C'mon, Iruka!" over his shoulder and hopping into the front passenger seat. The scarred man sighed, climbing behind the wheel of the vehicle at a much more moderate pace. Naruto was just so hyper...

"C'mon c'mon, we gotta pick up Gaara, dattebayo!"

Another sigh and the car was started. "Calm down, Naruto, we have plenty of time. You're not meeting your friends until six-thirty." Despite his words, Iruka couldn't stop the smile twitching insistently at his lips. Naruto's excitement was infectious as always. That and he really was glad the boys were going out together. Naruto and Gaara were constantly at his place on Friday night, but never before had they gone out with a group of friends. To be honest, up until Naruto met Gaara he really didn't have any friends at all. Luckily, once he reached high school he had started to gain the attention of others his age (in a positive way, for once), and Iruka was quite pleased he had managed to make friends with good kids like Shikamaru and Chouji.

Naruto hummed absently while he practically bounced in his seat, fumbling to retrieve his cell from his pocket once they neared Gaara's apartment. "Tanuki-chan! We're almost there, you better be ready, dattebayo!"

There was a pause as the blond listened.

"I already told you I don't care if it's a real word, I'll use it if I wanna," Naruto whined petulantly. "Just get your skinny ass outside!"

Iruka rolled his eyes, pulling into the parking lot. It was less than a minute later that a scowling Gaara, covered head to toe in black (well, maybe not quite toe, his shoes were still blindingly pink, after all), slunk out the front door, taking his time as he made his way to the waiting vehicle, looking the complete and total opposite of his best friend. It was almost enough to make Iruka laugh. "Okay, guys, the theater, right?"

"Mmhmm." Naruto poked his spiky head around the side of the seat to peer at the smaller boy behind him. "Hey, Gaara, you told Lee to meet us there, right?"

"Yes, he'll be there."

And sure enough, he was, already waiting for the others to arrive. The boys caught a glimpse of them as they climbed out of the vehicle to Iruka's call of, "Make sure you're home by eleven, Naruto. If you need a ride call me. And don't get into any trouble!" leaning against the outside wall of the theater, fiddling absently with the sleeve of his very green jacket, teeth worrying his bottom lip. The image made Gaara frown a little and wonder if something was wrong. This wasn't how he usually pictured Lee.

"Hey, Lee!" Naruto called happily, skipping over to him with a cheery smile. "Glad you could make it!"

Lee looked up so fast at the sound of his own name, Gaara was amazed he didn't get whiplash. His black eyes blinked slowly several times, like he couldn't comprehend what he was seeing, before the smallest of smiles quirked his lips. "You did come," he muttered softly, and Naruto promptly made a confused face. "Huh?"

Lee blinked once more, then shook his head as if to clear it. "Ah, nothing, Naruto-kun. My mind was simply plagued by some rather unyouthful thoughts."

Gaara winced at the term Lee had clearly picked up from Gai. He got more than enough of the man as it was.

"Well, there won't be anything unyouthful about tonight!" Naruto declared heartily, and Gaara growled lowly at the blond for encouraging his 'comrade'.

"Jesus Christ, Ma, I heard you the first time!" a very familiar voice called, causing them all to turn and watch as their brunette friend climbed from his mother's car.

"Home by twelve, pup!"

"Yeah yeah, I know!"

Kiba muttered something lowly under his breath before spotting the group and heading over with a grin. "Hey, guys."

"Hi, Kiba!" Naruto practically bellowed, like the boy wasn't three feet in front of him. "You ready?"

Kiba's smile turned downright feral at the question and Naruto's shifted to match as well. "Oh yeah, I'm ready."

Gaara caught the twin expressions and found himself taking a small step towards the much safer Lee. The older boy looked a little confused before asking, "Ready for what exactly?"

Kiba barked a short, harsh laugh. "Whatta ya mean 'for what'? It's Friday night."

Dattebayo!

Neji frowned at his reflection in the mirror, wondering once again if he looked all right. Which was ridiculous, who really gave a flying fuck how he looked, but... Damn it all to hell, he wasn't used to being nervous like this. He had no reason to be, he didn't care what anyone else thought.

He fidgeted awkwardly with his shirt. A white button-down shirt from Abercrombie and Fitch or someplace of the like, he couldn't remember, open overtop of a form-fitting black tee, loose denim jeans purposely ripped on one thigh, and pristine white Jordans. Hair pulled back into a low ponytail as always, white strip of cloth secured tightly around his forehead to hide... that. His silvery eyes scanned up and down once more. Yes, he looked fine.

Checking one last time to be sure every single hair was perfectly in place (when was it ever not?), he left his room, shutting the door softly behind him, absently checking to be sure he had his wallet and phone. He wasn't sure what exactly possessed him to go out tonight, especially to Josh Marsh's ridiculous party, but yet here he was, going. He supposed it was simply because he hadn't been out in so long and even he needed to get out of the house once in a while. After all, he hated his home. It had absolutely nothing to do with the conversation he'd witnessed between Gaara and Lee the other day. Nothing at all. Why should he care what those losers did on their Friday night? Why should he care if they were out having fun while he sat at home. Alone. This had absolutely nothing to do with that.

He heard a soft giggle and frowned in annoyance at the sound. Hinata was in her room on the phone, likely talking to that pink-haired girl she was always with. He really could care less, but as he passed the slightly ajar door, he couldn't help but overhear, "Well, Josh did invite me to his party... but..."

Something inside Neji jolted at the words. Josh? As in Josh Marsh? As in, his freshman cousin had been invited to the same party he was currently heading to? It would be too much of a coincidence to think otherwise. And something about Hinata at that party... it made him very, very uncomfortable.

Without giving it further thought, he pushed the door open fully, striding in and paying little mind to the shocked look of horror on his cousin's pale face. Ivory eyes fixed hard on ones so alike but so different than them, set in a fearsome glare. "Don't go to the party."

For a moment there was silence as Hinata just stared, phone still pressed against her ear. Then she swallowed hard, licked her lips, and, "I w-w-w-wasn't g-going to go, n-n-niisan. S-s-sakura and I w-were--"

Neji didn't bother to listen to anymore. Not only did her incessant stuttering piss him off, but he didn't give a rat's ass what she and her friend were doing so long as she stayed away from Marsh's party. He wasn't exactly sure why it bothered him, but it most definitely did. He probably just didn't want her anywhere near him when it could be avoided.

Yeah... that had to be it.

Dattebayo!

"I want popcorn!"

Shikamaru rolled his eyes as the loud demand washed over him. Troublesome. "Yeah yeah, Naruto, we know. You've only said it about six times now..."

"Don't make fun of me, lazyass! I want some fucking popcorn!"

"Me too!" Kiba piped up, following the blond as he all but ran to the concession stand, Gaara and Lee trailing closely behind, Lee asking the little redhead congenially if he would like to share a bag with him, Gaara saying something about how he couldn't stand all the butter. Shika sighed. He just knew he was in for a long night.

With a small start, he realized Chouji was still standing next to him, hands in his pockets. That was quite a surprise, considering everyone else was doing something that involved food, and when it involved food, his larger friend was normally the first one there. The lazy brunette cocked an inquisitive brow his way. "Aren't you hungry?"

Chouji just shrugged a bit. "Not really."

Shika blinked. He didn't believe that for a second. First of all, Chouji was hungry most of the time. It was nearly impossible to make him full. Second, being in the vicinity of the concession stand with the delicious smell of movie theater popcorn washing over them, even Shikamaru was practically salivating, and he was a scrawny little weed compared to the Akimichi. Meaning something was bothering Chouji enough that he actually didn't want to eat. Food was normally his comfort, for crying out loud. "Troublesome... Look, I'm buyin' a large... and some sour patch kids. And I can't eat it all myself. So you'd better help me out."

Chouji shifted a little, looking uncomfortable, before he shot a rather helpless look his friend's way. "You... need me to eat it?"

The way it was asked worried Shika a little, but outwardly, he smiled. "Yeah, I need you to." He was greatly relieved by his friend's nod of acceptance.

Dattebayo!

Sasuke huffed just a little as he stepped into the large house. Josh Marsh's parents, it seemed, really raked in the dough. He supposed that was why they could afford their vacation to the Bahamas, leaving their oh-so responsible son in charge of the house. Now their nicely decorated living room was filled to breaking with badly dancing teenagers, some of whom were already drunk it seemed. He scowled. It was only just after seven for God's sake. Hadn't they ever heard of pacing themselves?

Sighing, he asked himself once again why the hell he was there; but Itachi had caught a small case of the flu and was currently resting back at their house rather than spend his Friday evening out doing whatever it was Itachi did on Friday evenings. And Sasuke did not want to spend the night alone with Itachi, not on Friday. Friday and Saturday nights were his most precious reprieve from his brother's presence, and he refused to have that taken away. So he had gone out... and this was really the only place he could think of to go to.

Absently grabbing a plastic cup and filling it with cheap beer from the keg, he wondered around a bit, appreciating the nice house for what it was before it became completely trashed. Approaching the den, where the noise level was at least a bit lower, his dark eyes scanned the still quite crowded room and landed on the one person he was actually somewhat glad to see. "Hyuuga."

Neji looked up from where he was absently swirling the amber colored liquid in his cup when he felt someone stop right in front of him. Ignoring the fact that they were both wearing identical pairs of jeans, his eyes lifted further until they met a pair of familiar dark ones. He smirked a bit. "Uchiha."

The two ravens stared each other down for a moment, a silent agreement passing between them, and Sasuke then planted himself next to Neji on the couch in a scene very reminiscent of that day two weeks ago in the school office.

Not that Neji and Sasuke were friends. They could honestly just barely tolerate each other, both alpha-males of the worst kind, too stubborn and prideful to ever get along without clashing. But they liked each other more than they liked just about anyone else in the 'popular' crowd, because again, they were very alike in many ways. Mostly, they were both down to earth enough that they often wondered just why they were considered popular. They were both antisocial bastards who rarely talked in more than a grunt unless it was to insult someone. There was no reason for anybody to like them, and yet they both practically had their own fanclub. It was... well, annoying really. And so at times like these, both boys understood that they would stick together simply for self-preservation. It was easier to keep all the idiots away when there was two of them.

So now they sat silently next to each other on the couch, identical jeans, identical scowls, watching as around them people became more and more intoxicated, started tripping over things like other people's legs and furniture, started groping each other more openly, started getting louder and louder and louder... And both boys wondered once more if coming out that night was truly worth it.

Dattebayo!

"God, this movie's horrible."

Naruto's whisper (which really wasn't much of a whisper) carried through the theater, making several people chuckle quietly. And he was right. The film, which was supposed to be some kind of amazing blockbuster spectacular, got nothing but stunning reviews, and was talked of constantly for being nominated for a variety of different awards... well, it sucked. Hard. All the boys agreed, even Lee, who attempted to put an optimistic spin on it; but the cold, hard truth was that, with the exception of spectacular special effects, the movie was a bust. And this led to six very bored teenage boys. Always a force to be reckoned with.

Kiba, after sitting through about ten more minutes of barely mediocre acting and bad plotlines, couldn't take it anymore, and he knew Naruto was just barely holding on. So nudging the blond next to him with his elbow to gain his attention, he leaned in slyly, whispering his idea into the other hyper boy's ear. Naruto's response was immediate and enthusiastic, making a watching Shikamaru wish he had never let those two sit next to each other. He knew whatever was coming next would be troublesome.

After the two giggled like a pair of little girls, Naruto whispered excitedly, "You go first," and Kiba nodded his assent. Sitting back straight in his chair he took a deep breath, gathering himself together. Then he made his hand into a fist by his lap and slowly began a rather familiar pumping motion through the air. Lazy brown eyes suddenly widened to the size of saucers and Shika all but jerked in his seat. "What the hell are you--"

A moan, soft but loud enough to carry at least a few rows back fluttered through Kiba's lips, effectively cutting him off. It also drew the eyes of the other boys, all of whom had similar reactions to Shika. Damn, in the dark theater Kiba looked incredibly convincing, and they were sitting right next to him. They couldn't imagine what the people who looked over would think.

"Guys..." Chouji hissed softly, voice clearly unsure, but his plea went unheeded. Kiba's next moan was quite a bit louder and began attracting the attention of those around them. Several different things could be heard, laughing, mutters of "That's disgusting!", and a few cat calls, interestingly enough all from other guys. Kiba began picking the pace of both his hand and voice while Naruto shook with silent laughter, until finally he 'came' with a growl.

Naruto immediately took up the mantle, waiting no more than a matter of ten seconds or so before he began his own 'session'. Gaara rolled his eyes, deciding not to pay them anymore mind, Lee stared wide-eyed and shocked, Chouji still looked a little uncomfortable but at the same time a little amused, and Shikamaru was doing everything in his power to not show how hilarious he truly found the juvenile actions.

Naruto's performance was similar to Kiba's if not a bit louder, and managed to draw even more attention. The boys doubted anyone in the packed theater was actually watching the movie anymore. After Naruto finished with a cry of, "Oh... God ye-es!" he grinned like a maniac and turned towards the others. "Who's next?" he whispered.

As amusing as Shika found the whole thing, he was just too damn lazy to put on a show himself. Gaara was... well, Gaara, and Chouji tried to avoid drawing attention to himself all the time, there was no way he would pretend to masturbate in front of a crowd of people.

"I will try."

The voice, hesitant but determined, surprised them all.

"Lee, you don't have to," Gaara assured without taking his eyes off the screen, but Lee shook his head.

"No, Gaara-kun, I... I would like to give it a try."

Naruto snickered a gave him a thumbs up. "Go for it, bushy-brow."

A bit startled by the sudden, new nickname, but hardly minding, Lee leaned back in his seat and took a calming breath. He could do this. It was just pretend, not something actually vulgar... or illegal... probably. And it wasn't like he'd never jacked off before. Just act like he did when he masturbated at home, only louder because... because there were people listening and watching. He attempted for a brief moment not to panic. He could do this. It was all just acting. He would fit in tonight.

Fisting his 'erection' he pumped, very slowly, his eyes shut as he pretended he really were committing the act so as to make his movements easier. He let out a soft but not too soft groan, the kind you did when you'd just relieved a ton of tension. This was followed by a sharp intake of breath and then a few small pants before another groan, louder and longer. His hand sped up, twisting just the way he liked in real life and his voice started to steadily rise, small cries escaping, breath speeding up. His hand flew up and down, head tossed back, noises escalating, and then he 'came' with a silent intensity that far outdid both Naruto and Kiba's climaxes.

When his black eyes reopened, he blinked in surprise of all the boys, even Naruto and Kiba, staring at him like he'd grown a second head. "What?"

A light suddenly shone in his face, the man holding it wearing a bemused expression. "All right. I think you boys have had more than enough fun for one night."

As the six kids were escorted from the theater, a number of their fellow movie-goers (mostly other teenage boys) gave them an applause for their performance. Lee paused, stunned and unsure of what to do, but he suddenly found himself sandwiched between Naruto and Kiba in the dark aisle and being forced into a bow, in turn causing the applause to increase. He blushed a little, even if no one could see it.

"Thank you, thank you!" Naruto called loudly, holding his arms in the air like he'd just won an award. "We do parties! Just call 555-spa-- hey!" he was cut off as Gaara grabbed the back of his hideously orange jacket and dragged him out the rest of the way, a chuckling Kiba and smiling Lee behind.

The boys were, of course, asked to leave the theater, but that was hardly a surprise. They weren't in any real trouble, and the manager hadn't called the cops for disturbing the peace or public indecency or whatever the hell exactly pretending to orgasm in a movie theater would fall under, even though he could have. Boy, would that have been an interesting thing to explain to their parents. Shikamaru almost wanted to see his mother's face. "Hey, Mom, I need you to come bail me out because my dumbass friends pretended to wack off in the theater." Priceless.

"That was awesome, dattebayo!" Naruto giggled maniacally. "Did you see, we actually got clapped for!"

"They were clapping for Lee," Gaara growled with a roll of his eyes. "He was better than both of you put together."

"It was impressive," Shika drawled.

Kiba chuckled. "Hear that, Lee? You should go into making porn."

Lee had by then turned scarlet and muttered something about 'inappropriate'.

"So what are we going to do now?" Chouji asked softly. After all, it was only about eight o'clock. The night was still young.

Dattebayo!

Ino blinked slowly, trying to gather her bearings and properly recognize her surroundings. She knew where was, of course, at Josh's party with Brian and a bunch of his friends, but... well, it was hard to focus on anything right then. And for some reason, her brain was just refusing to cooperate, not to mention she felt a little dizzy... and nauseous. Was she drunk?

No, that wasn't possible, she had only had one beer. True she had never really drank more than a few sips before, but one beer wasn't enough to get anybody drunk... right?

But even her fogged mind couldn't deny it. Ino wasn't stupid, far from it. She knew she was drunk somehow. And so, it appeared, did Brian.

At least, that's what she assumed, since his hand was rather openly sitting on her ass. Yes, he had groped her a bit before, but only when they were making out, and only when no one else was around. Ino just wasn't very comfortable getting felt up in public, and she had told him that. Explicitly. So the fact that he was now disobeying one of the few rules she put up, not to mention randomly attacking her neck like some kind of vampire wannabe even thought he seemed almost completely sober, let her know that he thought she was too far gone to care. Well, she wasn't. And like she had said before, she wasn't stupid. This situation was dangerous.

"Brian, knock it off," she mumbled, attempting weakly to shove him away.

No such luck. He just muttered something back that sounded along the lines of, "It's fine," and renewed his efforts. It was not fine.

"Brian, I said no."

Again, she was blatantly ignored. In fact, one of his hands had actually moved up to her breasts, making her flush a bright red, mostly because his stupid football player friends were all staring openly, like it was some kind of fucking show. Shit, she had to get out of there. Fast. She had absolutely no intention of losing her virginity to a stubborn, pig-headed jerk like Brian Schaeffer.

Excusing herself, slurring out something about the bathroom, Ino managed to get away. While she did indeed need to pee, that's not where she was heading. She needed to find somewhere, or someone really, safe, and then bum a ride home from them. She knew she could always call her dad, that unless he was in the middle of surgery he would drop everything and come for her. She also knew he wouldn't react too badly to seeing her drunk, would understand and everything... but it would disappoint him. For some reason, probably because she was drunk, the thought actually made tears come to her eyes. She didn't want to disappoint him, not her daddy. The very thought killed her.

Shaking as she wandered aimlessly from room to room and trying not to cry like a drunken fool, Ino found herself in the somewhat quieter, calmer den. When her blue eyes landed on the couch, a huge sense of relief swept over her. Probably the only other freshman and one of the few sophomores attending the party sat there, looking just as sour as usual, not to mention sober. Sasuke and Neji. Her safety nets.

Stumbling her way over, nearly tripping headlong over a coffee table in plain sight, she approached the two dark-haired boys who eyed her warily. She licked her lips, attempting rather desperately to focus her gaze properly. "Hey, guys."

For a moment they stared before Sasuke grunted out a grudging, "Ino."

"Hey... look..." Ino paused, wanting to blurt out that she needed one or both of them to help protect her from her horny boyfriend and take her home before whatever innocence she had left was stolen, but something inside her screamed in time to make her stop. That... would be what was known as a drunken mistake. She didn't want them to know. They didn't need to know the details. They just needed to give her a ride home.

"Look..." she started again, but once more had to stop. The whole room had suddenly started spinning. Violently. She couldn't... think... what was...?

Neither Sasuke nor Neji had the chance to move before the pretty blond vomited whatever little bit of food was in her up into their laps.

Oh yes, the chapter title is indeed from the Kings of Leon song.

Just for the record, I have nothing against Sasuke or Neji (hell, if Neji suddenly popped out of my computer screen and asked me to marry him, I would probably fall over dead from joy)... or Ino for that matter, so that last part was not meant to be bashing. Just... life. Besides, we all know the three of them are complete asshats at this point and time in the story and totally deserved it.

Stay tuned for the second half of the children's exciting Friday night.

FantasyChick, UberRandom, remychan123, sasunaru4evar, iscreamdrizzle, diadem-de-amor, miss kaitlin inuzuka, AspergianStoryteller, Magical Fox, midnight. wolf62, 3karen3, Alexilaihorox, The Epitome of Eccentricity, narutosavior, x-Malicious-Me-x, Norfolk, LilliesCry, Nostalgic Plastic Duck, poolday, TuffChick, ChocolateAngel-san, valenciadarkness, Genesisgoboom, melon42, Kaitlin Murasaki, mindcaster15, Fire-In-A-Tiger-Lily, ShamaLamaDingDong, I always wanted to post a fic, The Morbid Stilettos

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