Author's Note: Just so you guys know, I realized I had my timeline in the first chapter off quite a bit.. and going three years would put them into 1978. My bad! I fixed this now.. the only thing that changed is the dates. From January of 1975 to October of 1974! (Since that's one month in.. that means they arrived in September of '74.)
Living the Lie:
November 2,
1974.
Two months. That's how long they'd been in 1974 and that's how long Juliet had been playing a certain type of 'house-wife'. Admittedly, she didn't mind so much, it was a nice change of pace to sit back and do absolutely nothing. But after several months of living on a beach, of being chased around the jungle or doing the chasing around the jungle, sitting in one place for so long was absolutely and utterly boring. She blew a piece of hair out of her eyes as she sat on the couch.
What was she supposed to do? Sawyer would spend most of the day in the security station along with Miles and Jin. Not that she didn't find herself going there daily and bringing all three of them different assortments of food. That was all she found herself doing most days. Cooking. Not that Daniel wasn't a sweetheart, but she found that too much time in his company was enough to make her start twitching. Not exactly the most endearing quality.
But she wasn't in the mood for playing Martha Stewart today. And although she was certain the boys in the security station were probably already wondering what she would bring them today and where she was, she didn't care to give them their fixation. The fact was, she wasn't a housewife. Therein lay the problem she'd had in her marriage before the island. She may have been timid, she may have been a pushover, but she would never give in to being a dedicated homely housewife. She'd gone to med school to make something of herself. She was glad that was the one thing that Edmund hadn't been able to take away from her.
Then again. Ben had taken it away. He'd managed to take away everything she'd worked for in her life in one big, large swoop. It was him who brought her here. It was him who manipulated her into staying. The only thing good she could say about him was that he'd changed her. She wasn't naive enough to think this change was for the better. She'd practically become an ice queen. She'd killed for survival.
Now she knew there was a bonus to being in the house alone most of the time. As she pulled her legs up onto the couch and hugged her knees to her chest, she let out a breath she hadn't even been aware she'd been holding in. That incessant urge to cry that filled her every now and then for the passed three and a half years was nagging her again but she sucked it up. That wasn't her. She didn't cry.
That was a lie. Ben had made her cry a few times, not that she'd admit that to anybody. Jack had been damned close to getting her there, not because he'd upset her, but because he'd finally made her feel something again. It hit her now. Hit her thoroughly and quickly for the first time in two months that Jack was truly gone. Gone with Kate. Probably didn't even remember her anymore. The only thing he'd left her with was a broken promise that he'd get her off this island, that they'd do it together.
And the tears flowed freely with that knowledge bearing down on her. She leaned her forehead down on the top of her knees and felt her body shake with the sobs. She was trying to force them back, make them stop, but it only seemed to be making them worse. And the knock on the door couldn't have come at a worse time. She sat there, trying to quiet herself and deep down hoping that if she ignored whoever was at the door that maybe, just maybe, they would go away.
It didn't work. By trying to hold in any noises she wound up making an even louder one and she sniffled in response to it.
"Juliet.." came Daniel's soft and concerned voice as he opened the door cautiously. He took in the sight of the blonde crying on the couch with her hand over her mouth as she tried to stifle any more noises. For two months she'd been the one he could come to and openly talk to about Charlotte and little Charlotte. And for two months he hadn't thought that maybe she was upset too. He closed the door gently behind him and shuffled over to the couch, awkwardly sitting down beside her.
He frowned as he tried to decide exactly what to do for her and found that he really had no idea how to comfort a crying woman. At his best he was still socially awkward. "Do you.. want to talk about it?" he asked with uncertainty. He was treading on dangerous ground and he knew it. At the shake of her head he tried to determine what he could do or say. He didn't do people very well. Science and equations were easy.. people, they were what was complicated about life.
Still, he tried his best regardless. He reached an arm out and wrapped it around her shoulders. He was more then surprised when she easily leaned into him and hid her face on the safety of his shoulder. "It'll be okay.." he told her, his voice was caring but cautious. He really had no idea what he was doing, or what he was even telling her would be okay since she wouldn't talk to him. He stared down at her hand which was gripping his shirt so tightly her knuckles were turning white. And it seemed almost automatic now as he put his other arm around her too.
This didn't really seem like that same tough as nails woman that had an all out brawl with Charlotte at The Tempest not so long ago. That had held a gun on him. Not that he blamed her. She had thought he was trying to kill everybody on the island. And she'd proven to him now she was actually a very warmhearted person if you took the time to notice. Which he had. She'd been the first to give him some comfort after Charlotte had died. She'd been the only one to continually give that comfort to this day.
Daniel stayed with her in the position for another five or so minute before he felt and heard the sobs subside to nothing. He let her take her time with untangling herself from him and he already could tell she was more then just a little embarrassed from the situation. "Are you okay?" he asked timidly.
Juliet wanted to avoid eye contact with Daniel if at all possible. She'd never done that before. Not that anyone had ever taken the time to comfort her, not in years. She'd cried on Ben's shoulder once. Just once, when she'd begged him to go home. She almost thought about telling Daniel that. She didn't. Instead she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Can.. can we not tell anybody about this?" she asked him, daring to peak over at him.
He smiled a little at her. He didn't blame her for not wanting anyone to know. "Sure.." he agreed with a slight nod. "I won't tell.."
Juliet smiled back at him in response as she attempted to erase the proof of her tears. "Oh.. I'm sorry," she muttered. "Obviously you came over for a reason and I sat here bawling my eyes out.." she half-choked out a laugh. "Is everything okay, Daniel?"
He arched an eyebrow up at that. It was one thing he liked about her. The way she called him Daniel. Unlike Sawyer, Miles and even Jin. They all called him Dan. Half the time Sawyer came up with stupid nicknames like Danny-boy or Mr. Wizard. "I asked you first.." he pointed out sheepishly.
Juliet was silent in response for a moment. He did have a point. Still, even if she did concede his point, she wasn't sure she was ready to go telling anyone about her guilty conscience. Not to mention her current realization that the man she thought she could possibly love, had left her here and never come back. Truthfully she wasn't even entirely sure how she should handle that thought. One thing was for certain, love was as useless as handing a vegetarian a hamburger.
She opened her mouth, almost about to breathe every single detail out to Daniel when she heard footsteps on the porch. She frowned before standing and headed down the hall without a single word, straight into the bathroom. Hopefully Daniel would keep quiet and she needed to make sure her face didn't look like she'd just let loose an entire stash of waterworks. Unfortunately it did. She quickly ran the water in the sink and washed her face.
Daniel stared after her down the hallway. He frowned slightly at the knock on the door that came within the next second and he noticed after a minute Juliet wasn't coming back from down the hall. He sighed before standing and opened the door. "Hi Horace.." he greeted the leader.
Horace smiled at Daniel. "Hi Daniel, spending time with Juliet?"
He nodded slightly in response.
"Hello, Horace," came Juliet's voice as she entered the living room again. A smile was pasted onto her face. "What can I do for you?"
Daniel stared at her, the confusion evident on his face. How had she managed to look completely normal not even two minutes after she stopped crying? If he hadn't been there he never would have known she'd just been crying.
"Actually, I was hoping to finally get you in to take your aptitude test," Horace told her with a smile. "I realize how bored you must be after all this time, I really apologize for not getting to you sooner."
Juliet smiled serenely in response, regardless of the fact her mind was screaming, 'thank you, Jesus!'. "That would be great," she answered with a nod. She turned to look at Daniel, locking eyes with him and hoping she was conveying enough of a notion with her eyes that she'd hurt him if he told anyone about their encounter. She could see him shift awkwardly in response. "There's leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry, Daniel.." she told him before following Horace out of the house.
"You know, I'm thrilled you've decided to stay as well, Juliet," Horace told her, slowing his pace to allow her to keep up beside him. "I was worried for a bit there after you told me you were going to get on the sub."
Juliet glanced away briefly. "Yes.. well.." she muttered, not entirely too certain how she was supposed to respond to that. "Don't get me wrong, I'd love to go home, but.." she frowned now. But what? Did she really have a reason that he could understand? Not really. Well, maybe. "They're great guys, James, Miles, Jin and Daniel.." she assured him. "But.. James needs some support and none of them are very good at that.."
Horace studied her carefully as they entered his office. He'd noticed something was off with her when Daniel had answered her door. He could see it in her eyes and from the fake smile she'd plastered on her face to try and fool them. "Are you alright, Juliet?" he asked her, shutting the door softly and moving to take a seat behind his desk.
Juliet stared at him with more then a little bit of surprise. "I'm sorry?" she questioned. How could he have noticed anything was off with her? She'd made sure she looked perfectly fine before she went out to her living room. What was it about these people?
He shifted uncomfortably for a moment in his seat before he sighed. "Is it because Daniel's leaving on the sub tomorrow?" he asked her cautiously. "I know that you're good friends with all--"
"Daniel's what?" Juliet asked immediately, all senses on alert suddenly. She stared at him with open surprise. Is that what Daniel had been coming to tell her?
Horace frowned now. "I apologize, I just assumed.." he paused and shook his head. "I guess I'd better explain," he decided. "Daniel wishes to work with our team of scientists back on the Mainland.." he told her. "He'll be leaving tomorrow morning for Ann Harbor."
"I see.." she replied, taking a defeated seat in the chair in front of Horace's desk. She vaguely thought that maybe Daniel had the wise idea. Not telling anyone that he was going to get on the sub. Perhaps she could have done that. No.. she couldn't have. "Maybe we should just get to the test.."
Another frown grew on Horace's face as he studied the blonde's defeated posture. He felt horrible for making whatever was upsetting her even worse on his assumptions. Best to leave his foot where it was in his mouth before he shoved it down any further. "Of course.." he agreed quickly, handing her the sheets of paper and then handing her a pencil. "You know, I never did ask what you did on the ship, Juliet."
Juliet was quiet for a moment. Doctor? No.. definitely not. She didn't want to be anywhere near sick or injured people anymore. "I was.." she began, but paused briefly. She put the pencil down on the desk and looked up at Horace to meet his eyes. Lies were more believable if you looked someone in the eye. "I was with somebody.."
Horace arched an eyebrow up. "Ah, Jim?" he questioned.
She shook her head almost immediately. "No, no.." she assured him. "He.. I.." she frowned now, not entirely sure how to explain the relationship between herself and Sawyer. Maybe talking to Horace wasn't such a bad idea. He didn't actually know her anyways. It was less embarrassing then if Sawyer or.. God forbid, Miles, should walk in and she were bawling her eyes out again.
"Friends, yes," Horace said for her with a nod. "Jim told me the same thing," he assured her. "What about this somebody?" he questioned, leaning back in his chair and studying the far-away look in her eyes. He easily deemed that this 'somebody' was likely the cause of the inner turmoil. "That's what's upsetting you, isn't it?" he asked, his voice softening.
Juliet shrunk back and picked up the pencil, immediately burying her face in the aptitude test.
Horace opened his mouth to speak again when there was a knock on the door. He quickly called out a, "Come in," as his eyes remained focused on the blonde before him.
"Hey, H," came Sawyer's voice as the door was opening. "Phil tripped on the damned power line again and--" he paused, looking at Juliet with an arched eyebrow. "Hey, Juliet."
"Hi James," came her reply without looking up from what she was doing.
Horace studied her briefly once more with a worried look before he looked at Sawyer at his door. "Again?" he questioned with a shake of his head. "How bad?"
Sawyer watched the worried look that crossed Horace's face as he looked at Juliet and quickly hid the frown in response to it. "Just a twist, should 'prolly be good in a day or two."
"Very well.." Horace acknowledged. "When he comes back, be sure to tell him to steer clear of those power lines," he stated, shooting Sawyer a look of amusement.
"You got it boss," Sawyer replied with a grin. He glanced at the back of Juliet's head for a moment. "See ya' later, blondie."
Juliet paused momentarily and turned to look back at him. She shot him a pointed look as though to say, 'I know you didn't just call me that..'.
Sawyer smirked instantly at the look she was giving him. He couldn't help himself but to grin. He gave a fake shiver and pretended to rub his arms from the chill. "Careful there Sunshine, that look could make hell freeze over," he shot out quickly before shutting the door and making a quick escape.
Horace arched an eyebrow up and briefly wondered how she put up with him at times. But when she turned back to look at the aptitude test he noticed the small smile playing out on her face. Obviously she didn't 'put up' with it. She actually seemed to enjoy his childish antics. Perhaps juvenile nicknames and silly little jokes were what she needed. So he leaned back and allowed her to finish the test in silence.
A little while later he glanced it over as she handed it back to him and he smiled up at her. "Wonderful, I'll get this to Amy and she'll determine where you'll be placed by later on tonight," he told her. He held out and hand and smiled when she took it. "And Juliet, if you need to talk, I'm always around," he assured her. "I know Amy's made you the same offer."
Juliet smiled briefly in response. "I'll keep that in mind," she promised. "I'd better get back, maybe make the Master of Nicknames some meatloaf."
Horace chuckled immediately, remembering the man's face the previous month when she'd threatened to make meatloaf. "He doesn't like meatloaf, does he?" he questioned with a knowing smile.
"He despises it," Juliet replied with a wink. "See you later, Horace."
Horace let out a laugh and shook his head. Yes, these people that came here were most definitely a unique bunch, there was absolutely no denying that.
Later that night..
The dinner had been mostly silent. She'd made spaghetti, regardless of the meatball joke she'd cracked to Horace. With some careful prodding Juliet had managed to get Daniel to admit that he was leaving so he wouldn't interact with little Charlotte and so that he could work on getting them home. Home had dug it in for her and she'd immediately let it go, promising not to tell the others about it. Instead they were all eating the dinner she'd made.
She figured if Daniel would be gone tomorrow, this would be their last chance to have a meal with all of them together. Yet, after a few minutes the silence was broken.
"You know, you really should just say you're married to Jim here," Miles told her. "I think you should stay jobless and keep cooking," he suggested before adding more spaghetti onto his plate.
"Shut it, Gordo," Sawyer growled, almost feeling a twitch coming on.
Juliet smiled sweetly and leaned in close to Miles. "Tell me, Miles," she began. "Did I look like Susie Homemaker when I took that potshot at you in the jungle when you first arrived here?"
Miles gulped and sat back in his seat. "I always thought Sayid took that shot.. nice aim, getting it right by my feet like that."
Daniel smiled without being able to help himself.
"What are you talking about?" Juliet asked curiously. "I missed."
Miles choked on his spaghetti while Sawyer, Daniel and Jin all let out a laugh.
A knock on the door cut into the moment and Juliet was on her feet to get it when the next comment from Miles came.
"See look?" he pointed out. "We don't even have to tell her to answer the door anymore! We've domesticated her!"
Sawyer snorted and spit out his Dharma beer back into the can in response to that.
Juliet shook her head and opened the door. "Hi there, Amy," she said, smiling instantly at the other woman at the door and stepping aside to let her in.
"Hey Juliet," she said with a small smile in return. "Horace asked me to take a look at your test, I just had a few questions," she explained before she noticed the four men sitting at the dinner table. "And I interrupted dinner, I'm so sorry."
Juliet shook her head. "Not a problem, I'm finished anyways," she told her, shooting a look in Miles' direction who instantly turned and went back to shoveling his spaghetti into his mouth.
Sawyer watched the two women head down the hall with a curious look. He figured Juliet would probably wind up working as a doctor. She actually was a doctor, so it only seemed fit that's where she'd wind up here as well.
He kept up with joking around for several more minutes with the other three men before Juliet and Amy emerged once more from down the hall.
"Come on, I'll take you to get your jumpsuit," Amy said with a smile and led Juliet out the door.
Sawyer narrowed his eyes slightly and looked around the table. "Doctors don't wear no damned jumpsuits, do they?" he questioned.
Jin shook his head. "No. Doctor's no wear jumpsuit."
"What kinda job is she getting?" Miles asked, leaning back in his chair with some thought. "I swear, if she gets on Security, we're all screwed."
Daniel smiled at this and finished his plate of spaghetti.
They all waited in silence for her to come back. When she did come back ten minutes later they all stared at the navy blue jumpsuit in her hands.
"No way," Sawyer stated, staring at it.
"You guys can do the dishes," Juliet called out as she went down the hall.
All four men watched her go.
"Only one place in this hippie commune wears that color, right?" Sawyer asked out of confusion.
Miles stared down the hall after her. "Man.. that's hot."
~*~*~
November 20,
1974.
"So, you're just a jack of all trades, ain't ya?" Sawyer questioned. It was the first time since she'd gotten the job at the motor pool that he'd gotten the chance to see her work. Yet there she was, on a damned roll out cart underneath his broken down hippie bus, using power tools as though she'd done it every day of her life.
"What?" came the muffled reply.
Sawyer rolled his eyes. He nearly forgot she couldn't hear him over the power drill. She probably didn't even know he was there. He'd just popped by to see when it would be done and two of the other men had grinned and joked to him about how 'stellar' it was to have a chick working with them before pointing to her under the van. He was also vaguely certain he heard them say they were 'stoked' about it. No, he hadn't missed the 70's.
He kicked the side of the van twice and heard the drill flick off. He watched with some amusement as she wheeled herself out and he stared at her face where she had grease streaks on her cheek and a bandana in her hair.
"What?" Juliet asked a second time, sitting up and placing the drill down on the cart. "Don't you have better things to do?"
Sawyer chuckled and pointed to his own cheek. "You uh, you got a little.." he watched as she wiped at her cheek. He also watched as it didn't come off. "Uh.. never mind, don't worry about it," he stated with a shrug. "So what else can you do?"
Juliet smirked in response to that as she got to her feet. "Like I'm going to tell you?" she teased. "I prefer to keep my mystery."
He arched an eyebrow up in response to that. "Alright, lemme' name the things I can think of off-hand," he stated. "Baby doctor," he stated, putting a finger up and ignoring her pointed look. "Pretty good with a hammer and nails from what I seen on the beach," he stated, putting a second finger up.
She chuckled in response to that. "If you can't use a hammer and nails then you're not a very bright person."
"Rifle and handgun extraordinaire," he added in, throwing up a third finger.
Juliet leaned back against the bus and watched him quietly as he tried to determine other things besides her new-found mechanics skill set.
"You speak Latin!" he threw out, giving himself a reason to put up another finger.
Juliet's eyebrows rose automatically. "I speak three different languages, James," she told him. "I don't see what that has to do with anything."
"Three?" Sawyer asked in shock. "English, Latin.. and what else?" he questioned.
Juliet smirked.
"C'mon, you can't tell me you know another language and not tell me which language," Sawyer told her with annoyance.
"Sure I can," Juliet told him with a smile. "I'm also pretty good with hand-to-hand combat, want to see?"
Sawyer took a step back. "Nope, nah, I'm good."
Juliet released a laugh in response and shook her head lightly in response. "You're certifiably insane, you know that don't you?" she asked with amusement.
"So, I count 7 different things that I know of, including this mechanic thing," he pointed out. "So where'd you learn all this crap, Others 101?"
Juliet narrowed her eyes slightly in response and purposely stepped towards him, invading his personal space. "I'll show you my eighth skill of killing somebody in their sleep pretty soon, James."
Sawyer coughed in response. He should have known better than to throw that out when they were having a perfectly normal, fun-filled conversation. No one ever told him he had much tact before though. "I'll keep one eye open," he assured her.
She shook her head and turned away from him, picking up the drill and pulling the switch a few times to cause it to make a loud noise. She smirked when she noticed him jump slightly out of the corner of her eyes. "Make your own dinner tonight," she told him as she laid back down on the cart and wheeled back under the van.
Sawyer knew one thing. With comments like he threw out sometimes, he was lucky that sub wasn't coming back for six months or else Juliet might wind up joining Daniel out in the real world. He was really gonna have to work on his skills of offending other people. He only had three people left on Craphole island to watch his back now that Daniel left. And he probably shouldn't be pissing them off.
Later that night..
Juliet opened the front door and stepped inside. She felt like she was a complete ball of grease at this point. Just like most days after spending the day in the Motor Pool. She sighed, pulling her ponytail out as she yanked her bandana off, letting her hair fall back down her back.
"You hungry?"
Juliet paused and glanced over at Sawyer momentarily as he popped his head out of the kitchen. "Not really," she replied coolly before moving to head down the hallway.
"Aw, come on, Juliet," he muttered. "I made enough for botha' us."
Juliet turned back to him and frowned at the apologetic look that was on his face. She noted the piece of hair that fell into her face and blew it away effortlessly with a sigh. "Alright Martha, what did you make?"
Sawyer popped his head back into the kitchen and grabbed the plate before popping his head, and the plate, out from around the corner.
Juliet immediately felt the corners of her lips twitch as she tried not to smile, laugh, or do both. "Peanut butter and jelly?" she asked, succeeding in making herself look disinterested.
Sawyer frowned. "Peanut butter and banana's actually," he admitted. "Didn't have any jelly.."
This time the corners of her lips betrayed her and they curled upwards in a shit-eating grin. "You can't cook, can you?" she asked him.
"Not a damned thing," he admitted.
She released a chuckle and accepted the plate he offered her. "My sister used to make these for us for dinner," she admitted, taking a seat at the dinner table and watching as he followed with his own plate.
"You gotta sister?" he questioned, glancing at her as she took a bite of the sandwich.
Juliet lifted her eyes to meet his gaze. "Rachel," she informed him.
"Why was yer' sister always makin' you guys dinner?" he questioned curiously.
"Our parents divorced when we were young," she answered casually. "My mom worked nights, so Rachel had to make dinner."
Sawyer studied her carefully. This was really the first thing he'd ever learned about her purposely. Which was sad. After spending months in someone's companionship, he figured you should know a hell of a lot more about them. He realized he really didn't know much at all about her.
Juliet dared to look at him again and she frowned at the pity in his eyes. "Don't make it out to be a big deal," she told him. "I had a pretty good childhood," she pointed out to him. "It was just missing a parent.."
Sawyer knew what she meant by that statement. She meant compared to his, hers seemed pretty peachy to her. "Don't mean it didn't suck."
"Doesn't mean that it did," she challenged. She pushed her half-eaten sandwich forward on the table and stood. "Thanks for dinner," she added before heading down the hall.
Sawyer stared at the half-eaten sandwich and sighed.
()()TBC()()
Hoe you guys enjoyed this chapter. As you can see, I don't want to FULLY focus on Sawyer/Juliet. There were other cool people there with them to interact with!
-Sarah