I'm on a writing spree. Though I'm sure you guys don't mind it!
This one goes out to, koralina!
Living the Lie:
July 4,
1975.
"You know, I've done more holiday celebrations in the Dharma Initiative, I find that sad and amusing at the same time," Juliet stated as she took a seat beside Sawyer at a picnic table. They were currently having a barbeque for the fourth of July. There was even talk of fireworks in an hour or two.
He arched an eyebrow up at her. "Weren't much for the holidays?" he questioned.
"No, I was," she informed him. "My ex just thought it was amusing to have me work almost all the holidays. I can't remember the last time I've seen fireworks," she admitted. "Is it weird that I'm excited about them?"
He shrugged. "I stopped watching them when I was eight."
She arched an eyebrow up at him.
"Well it ain't like you don't know what happened when I was eight," he reminded her with a roll of the eyes.
Juliet paused at the mention of it and looked down. "Why don't we do something else?" she questioned, shifting the conversation. "We could go read? Play some really loud music?"
He tried not to laugh at how hard she tried to think of other things they could do besides watch the fireworks.
"We could get Jin drunk," she suggested next. "Teach him dirty words?"
He grinned at that one. "We can save that for another day," he said with a laugh. "Not that I'm against the suggestion," he noted. "But I'll just watch the fireworks with ya'."
She tilted her head to the side with uncertainty. "Are you sure?"
"Yep."
Two hours later..
After fifteen minutes, she realized he wasn't coming back from the bathroom. She wandered towards the house they shared and opened the door cautiously to find him nursing a beer on the couch. She shut the door behind her and took a seat next to him, picking up her book from the end table and opening it up.
He glanced over at her, not entirely sure what to say. Instead of saying anything, he put his beer down and picked up his own book.
"You should wear your glasses, unless you want to get a headache again," she stated, not looking up from her page.
Sawyer arched an eyebrow up and looked at her. She had the smallest of smiles lighting her face and he had to admit, he was thankful she followed him. He reached over, grabbed his glasses, and put them on as she suggested before beginning to read as well.
Thirty minutes later, when the first bangs went off in the distance, he noticed the weight on his shoulder. He wasn't really sure how long she'd been asleep, but he didn't bother to wake her as he continued reading. He was going to have to make up for making her miss the fireworks. He tried not to laugh when he realized she was snoring.
July 7,
1975.
"Gotcha' something," Sawyer announced as he entered the house.
Juliet looked up from the book she was reading and stared at him in confusion. "Is there a holiday I missed today?" she questioned, knowing there wasn't.
He held it out for her to see.
Both of her eyebrows arched up immediately. "Is that supposed to be a bathing suit?" she asked him, marking her page and getting up to have a closer inspection.
"Uh... yea'," he replied, glancing back at it.
At this point she practically had her nose to it as she glanced it up and down. "It's hideous."
"It's the 70's," he reminded her.
"Right," she conceited, then looked up at him. "Why did you get me a bathing suit?" she asked him. She poked at the full bathing suit with the short-type bottoms. "It looks more like a skimpy dress..." she muttered.
He was trying really hard not to laugh right now. "Well, Miles and Jin are goin' swimming, I was gonna go too, thought maybe if you wanted to go, you'd probably need one."
She frowned slightly, taking it from his hands and holding it at a distance. "You really want me to go?" she questioned, averting her eyes from the bathing suit and looking at him.
"Thought it would be more fun if ya' did, we can make fun of Miles' bathing suit, if ya' think yours is hideous? His is downright hilarious."
"Well fuck," she muttered and went to her room to change.
Both his eyebrows rose up at her language. "That mean you're comin'?" he called out.
"Yeah, yeah!" came the muffled response from down the hall.
He grinned when she came out a few minutes later looking vaguely uncomfortable but ready, wearing a sundress over the bathing suit. "We got towels already. C'mon, ya' don't wanna miss this," he stated, grabbing her hand and pulling her with him out the door.
Juliet was chuckling at the childish enthusiasm on his face as they headed towards the docks, Sawyer pulling her along by the hand at a faster pace than necessary. "This better be as hilarious as you think it will be," she mumbled with a laugh.
"Trust me, it's better," he informed her. A few minutes later he stopped her just shy of the beach, only barely out of sight of their friends but close enough they could see them. "Look."
And she did. Almost immediately she burst out laughing, bending over and leaning on Sawyer to keep her balance. "Oh my God..." she breathed out after a minute, still chuckling. "Those are seriously short-shorts..." she muttered, laughing once again.
He was laughing mostly from how hard she was.
A moment later she glanced up at him with a playful look. "You wearing a pair of those too?" she asked, nudging him in the ribs and waggling her eyebrows at him.
He smirked. "Hell no," he stated defiantly.
She glanced down to see that he was wearing a pair of khaki's that he'd chopped into his own pair of board shorts. She wasn't entirely sure how she hadn't noticed that earlier. "That's cheating," she said with amusement. "Miles will be jealous."
"Oh he's already mad he didn't think of it," he informed her. "Because Jin did the same thing as me."
She was grinning from ear to ear.
"C'mon, blondie," he stated, heading down to the beach now.
Juliet followed after him, stopping at the line of towels they had going. "He's going to say something cheeky as soon as I'm out of this sundress," she muttered.
"Come on, ladies!" Miles called out, doing a belly flop into the water off of the dock.
Sawyer rolled his eyes and winced at the sound of the belly flop as Miles hit the water.
Juliet snickered. "Bet that hurt," she stated with a smirk. She stared at him momentarily as he pulled off his shirt before getting it together and pulling the sundress over her head. The wolf-whistle came moments later from the water.
"If I had a dollar, I'd stick it in your cleavage!" came Miles' voice.
"Told you," she said, glancing back at Sawyer. She watched him quickly avert his gaze to the water and she arched an eyebrow up.
He coughed. "Meet ya' in the water!" he commented before running down the dock and jumping in near Miles and Jin.
"Men..." she muttered with a roll of her eyes.
"C'mon Juliet!" Miles called out. "JUMP!"
She stood at the bottom of the dock, not quite on it yet with a look of uncertainty.
"Jump!" came Jin's voice as well.
"I don't think she's gonna do it," Sawyer noted, glancing at her. He was proven wrong however. They had all looked away for a moment when suddenly the blonde came down in a cannon ball right in the center of the three men. "Holy shit!" he muttered, getting water right in the face.
Miles and Jin were practically in hysterics as she surfaced.
"Nice jump," Jin stated, grinning at her.
Juliet just gave him a smile.
"You look hot," Miles stated. A moment later he was pushed under water by Sawyer. He surfaced, spitting water out and glaring daggers at the Southerner.
Sawyer just gave Juliet a wink.
She tried her best not to turn red. She was fairly certain she succeeded.
Horace was chuckling as he stopped at the docks on his patrol. He watched as Sawyer, Jin and Juliet all hit Miles with waves of splashes at the same times. They were definitely an interesting bunch.
Juliet gave Jin a devilish smile as she nodded her head at Sawyer.
Jin tried not to give anything away and neither did Miles, who also saw the look. They both knew she was about to do something to Sawyer and they were both mildly entertained at the thought.
She swam quietly up behind him, slowly raised her hands, and within moments, she had dunked him under the water. She noted that although Miles and Jin were laughing, when Sawyer resurfaced, he was giving her the same evil smile that she had given Jin. "Oh crap," she muttered, and quickly swam away.
Miles and Jin were hooting with laughter as Sawyer chased Juliet to shore. And Sawyer was catching up fast.
They were both on foot now, about thigh high, when Sawyer finally caught up to her. He had his arms around her.
"Oh shit," she said, laughing. "I didn't mean it, I swear!" she shouted with a shriek as they both toppled over and fell into the water. They both surfaced at the same time and she dared a peek over at him when she got a couple of splashes of water in her direction. "James!" she growled out mid-laugh, attempting half-ass splashes in return.
A moment later and the splashes were hitting her from three directions and all she could do was cover her face as all three of the men were splashing her.
Horace left them all to their games and headed back to the barracks, shaking his head with laughter.
After a few seconds the splashing stopped and she could remove her hands. "Jerks," she muttered with a smile.
"Play chicken?" Jin asked.
Miles was smirking.
"I bet I could whoop Miles' ass," Juliet challenged.
"Oh, you're on!" Miles stated, grinning at her. "Jin my man, you mind?"
Jin complied, going under and getting Miles up on his shoulders.
Juliet let out a shriek of laughter as she was suddenly lifted up above the water on Sawyer's shoulders. She had to lean over and wrap her arms around him just to stay up. "A little warning would have been nice," she managed to get out while chuckling.
"My bad, blondie, now stop choking me," he told her with a laugh. "Save the killer holds for Miles!"
She complied, releasing her hold around his neck and sitting up straight on his shoulders.
Sawyer and Jin both seemed to have the same idea as they glanced at each other. They grinned and gave slight nods. "3... 2... 1... GO!" both of them shouted at once.
Before Juliet and Miles could begin the game of chicken, both of them hit the water.
"Run Jin, Run!" Sawyer called out as both of the men went running up shore and back towards the barracks.
Miles and Juliet smirked at each other.
"Let's get them," Miles stated, running ahead of her.
Juliet had to stop half-way up the beach when she noticed something. She sat down in the sand, laughing, when she noticed Miles' short-shorts had ridden up and she could see his left butt-cheek.
July 12,
1975.
Ever since the day they all went swimming, Sawyer noticed that Jin had been acting funny. He was quiet, distant, even Juliet wasn't able to get him to talk about whatever bothered him. So now as the two of them saw together in the security room, he decided to give it a shot and break the silence. "Wanna talk about it?" he grunted out. Not exactly how he meant to bring it up, but he supposed it was something at least.
Jin didn't say anything, nor did he look at him at first. He just thought about the offer. It wasn't often that anyone other than Juliet made attempts to talk about things, or make him feel better. He appreciated the effort.
Sawyer decided not to push it. He went back to glancing at the monitors. If the man wanted to talk, he would talk. Right?
"You know..."
Sawyer looked over at Jin.
"Before married, me and Sun, we act like you and Juliet," Jin admitted to him. "In water other day?" he reminded him, finally looking over at the other man.
"Juliet and me? We're just friends, Jin," he admitted.
"Island, it help me and Sun love again," Jin told him. "I do not regret crashing here, just that Sun and baby are gone." He leaned back in the chair and glanced up at the ceiling. "But I have faith, Sun is home and baby is alright. Ji Yeon..."
"Ji Yeon?" Sawyer questioned. "That Korean for something?"
"Flower of wisdom," Jin tells him. "Is also name I pick if baby was girl. I am sure it was girl."
Sawyer gave him a bit of a smile. "Ya' know.. I got a kid out there," he admitted wistfully.
Jin looked at him.
"Never met her," Sawyer explained. "Saw her picture once, her name is Clementine."
Jin frowned. "We alike."
Sawyer looked away. "Nah, you were taken away," he told the other man. "I just, well, it's hard to explain.
"If we go home, you go see her?" Jin asked him curiously.
He thought about that one. "When, Jin, not if," he told the man with a smile and confidence that he didn't really have anymore. He gave him a pat on the back.
Jin smiled at him and looked back at the monitors.
Sawyer was relieved he managed to avoid the question, but it did leave him wondering.
Later that night...
"Jin seems happier," Juliet mentioned as she handed Sawyer a beer and took a seat on the couch near him. "But now you seem a bit distracted."
"We talked," he explained with a shrug. "About Sun and the baby."
Juliet found her head tilting to the side slightly as she tried to understand. "What's got you so worried then if Jin is feeling better?" she dared to ask.
When he looked over at the blonde, he realized what Miles had said back in May was entirely too true. When she looked at you, she saw straight through you with those blue eyes. It was scary and endearing all at the same time. The confusion made him wonder though, because she was normally quick to catch on. "You've read my file, haven't you?"
She shifted awkwardly for a moment and put a little more space between them now than was entirely necessary. "Honestly... I have to admit I never read much of yours."
His eyebrow lifted in response. "Kate's?" he asked next, although saying her name still made his stomach twist a little bit.
Juliet shook her head. "I was never supposed to have anything much to do with the other survivors, just..." she stopped momentarily. "Just Jack."
"Why Jack?" he wanted to know. "What made Jack so special that they sent you specifically to get his attention." And for a moment, he was certain he saw some amount of shame.
"I swear, I didn't know until after the fact," she stated quickly. "But Ben sent me in there for Jack, because I bore a remarkable resemblance to his ex-wife."
"How'd you figure that out?" he dared to ask after a moment of silence.
"I was ease-dropping on a conversation between Ben and Jack, when Ben told him," Juliet explained to him. "I'm not saying that I wouldn't have done it still, it's just that..." she paused, gave him one of those looks that could kill. "How did you turn this into talking about me?" she asked quickly.
He smirked at how easy it was, only thing that went wrong was that she actually noticed. "Does this mean you lied to me when we first got here?"
"Excuse me?" she asked him, looking slightly offended.
"The I Never game, you said you knew all about me," he reminded her.
She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "Then... I suppose I did lie," she admitted. "Look, I was drunk, and I guess I actually did want to tell somebody something for once," she stated, looking away. She huffed out a laugh as she shook her head. "I'm just that anti-social that I needed some kind of reason to justify it."
He wasn't sure if he should find it funny and be relieved, or if he should find it said that she thought it was necessary to lie to him all those months ago just so that she could talk about her past.
"I know what I've made you aware that I know about, nothing more," she told him. "And I apologize for lying, but, I really would like to know what's wrong now. I'm sure if I'd read more of your file, I would know, but I didn't."
Both of them were silent for a moment and the silence was awkward.
He noticed that she was just about to stand when he couldn't hold it in. "I have a daughter."
She immediately stopped herself from standing and looked at him, fully sitting back down.
"It's like I told Jin, her name is Clementine, I only ever seen a picture of her," he explained. "Only reason it's got me thinkin'... is cause Jin asked me that if we go back, if I was gonna go and see her."
Her first thought was the same as Jin's. Her second was the realization that herself and Sawyer weren't the only one's saying 'if' anymore. "What did you say?"
He shook his head. "I didn't answer, I just told him 'when' instead of 'if', even if I didn't believe it anymore," he told her with a shrug. He frowned and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes and putting the still-closed beer down on the end-table next to him. He felt the heat from her leg on his and noticed that she was sitting directly beside him again, closer than she'd been originally.
"You gave him hope, James," she stated, placing her hand over his. "That's not wrong. And I have to believe that you did what was best for your daughter before you landed here, by not seeing her."
He stared at her incredulously.
She gave him a small smile. "You weren't the person that you are now, you weren't ready," she stated. "I think the reason you never tried to be there, was because you thought she deserved better."
"It ain't like I was thinkin' wrong," he reminded her.
"Maybe then," she admitted. "But not now."
That same incredulous look was crossing his face again. "How would you know?"
She stood up and she pulled him with her, opening a shade and pointing across the yards to Jin and Miles playing football. "You helped Jin, gave him hope," she explained. "You gave Miles a friend, something it didn't seem he had a whole hell of a lot of before," she added.
He glanced at her and noticed that she was simply staring out the window. "You okay?" he dared himself to ask.
"It's not just them, James," she reminded him. "You've tried to save me even when you didn't like or trust me very much," she stated, shuddering at the memory of the Others' attempting to chop off her arm. "When you noticed my nightmares, you gave me a dream catcher for Christmas, and... that was the sweetest thing that anybody's ever done for me."
He frowned slightly. Not because he had done these things, but because she'd apparently been that touched by something so small he had done, even now.
"You listen when I actually let myself talk and you came after me when I ran away," she pointed out. "You saved my life. I owe you so much," she stated, finally daring to look at him only to find he was looking right at her already. "Thank you..."
Sawyer watched as she headed down the hallway. It was a moment later and he followed her down the hall, into her room. "Juliet?"
"Hm?" she muttered, turning and glancing at him, only to realize they were almost nose to nose. She was stunned into silence.
"Thanks," he mumbled, hugging the blonde.
For a moment she stood completely still out of shock. Less then a second went by and she felt the butterflies, and after the second, she managed to return the embrace. "You're welcome..." she managed to get out.
July 21,
1975
It had been a little over a week and admittedly, they hadn't spoken very many words to each other since that night. Juliet found herself spending more and more time over at Amy's place, but even that was odd now. Amy kept swooning over Horace, and then she would prod about 'Jim'. And Juliet just couldn't handle it.
She wanted those butterflies that she had felt to just be a fluke. She didn't want to get those feelings about somebody again and she wasn't sure she could handle them. And so she took out her frustrations in the motor pool, kicking a van that she couldn't get to start, cursing slightly when she hurt her foot.
This was when she should just get on the next sub, get out while she could. She was alone, and she knew it, so she sat down and just covered her face. A moment later, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and was shocked to see Daniel taking a seat beside her. She knew the sub was coming today, she had no idea though, that Daniel was on it. "Daniel?" she choked out. "What are you-"
"I came to visit," he told her. "I'm glad I did... what's wrong?" he asked. Although people weren't his strong-suit still, he'd at least gotten better. He really wanted to help her for once.
"I hate him for making me feel like this..." she mumbled out, shaking her head. Daniel was safe to talk to. Daniel was safe, safe because he was here now, but because he'd also be gone soon.
"Jack?" Daniel asked. Because last time it had been all about Jack. She seemed just as sad now as she had been the day before he left.
"No, James," she muttered.
"What did he do?" he asked her. "Was he being his usual rude self again?"
She immediately shook her head. "I just, I don't know what to do, Daniel..." she admitted, shaking her head in defeat. "I've been avoiding him for nine days, hoping it would just go away..."
"I don't understand, hoping what would go away?" he asked her. If it wasn't that Sawyer had said something to piss her off, then what was making her act like this. And after a minute, it hit him. And he was definitely guffawed by the realization. "You like him," and although he meant it as a question, it came out more like a statement.
She was silent in response.
He took her silence as a yes. Had Sawyer really changed that much? "Tell you what, Juliet... that sub comes back in a month. Why don't I stay if Horace doesn't mind?" he suggested. "We can talk... if you want. I can get back on it in a month?" He wanted to be there for her this time, just like she'd done for him for the first two months.
"You would do that for me?" she asked him looking at him with the utmost confusion.
He gave her that awkward smile of his and nodded. "You were there for me when I needed it," he reminded her. "I'd like to return the favor, if you'll let me..."
And although it was completely abnormal for her to do so, she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. Because she was feeling vulnerable and she just needed that little bit of human contact for the moment.
Hope you guys enjoyed that! Welcome back to the story Daniel! Even if it is just for next month!