We are in a predicament! On my poll, we have two choices. On my profile, we have 48 stories. That means we need more people to vote! We have had 4 voters- it's a 50/50 vote right now- not good! Review please :)

Disclaimer- I still own no one except for Hightopps other than Tarrant, Julia, and maybe Mira's parents. Stop making me do this! :(

"I'm trying really hard not to cry over you because every tear is just one more reminder that I don't know how to let you go."—Unknown

Mirana, 14 years old

As I unwillingly left the room with my father, I was trying so hard not to cry. Because if I cried, Tarrant would see that I had no hopes of seeing him again. I couldn't do that to him. So I held my tears back as much as I could, trying not to focus on the tightness in my throat. I hated that feeling. When I did cry, and that wasn't often, I would notice the way my throat tightened to a point where it was very painful and then I had to let myself cry. It felt like someone was trying to choke me from the inside, like they were squeezing my tonsils until I agreed to let my tears fall.

My father had left me in my room, telling me not to leave until it was time for supper. I obeyed- mostly because, without Tarrant, outside my room held no interest for me. Julia came to see me, much to my surprise. I had been lying against the headboard on my bed, staring at the wall across from me. She came in quietly, not fully capturing my attention. She clawed her way onto my bed and curled up against my side, sniffing back her tears. Father must've talked to her and Tarrance as well. I do wish Julia would 'date' someone of her own age. If it must be a Hightopp, I wish it would be Tyler. Oh well, let her like whoever she likes.

"Mira, are we gonna see Tarrance or Tarrant ever again?' she asked, so innocently.

"Yeah, baby girl. We'll see them again. Eventually," I added in a whisper, sighing to myself. I wrapped one arm around my little sister and fingered her golden locks. She was getting so big. Already, she was 8 years old and nearly my height. I felt like time was passing too quickly- Racy was soon to take the throne, I would become a Lady in Waiting at just 16 years old, Julia was growing taller and more mature everyday, Tarrant and I…we were almost an 'us', not a me with a side of him.

You know what my problem was? I loved him. I loved his name. I loved the way he looked at me. I loved his gorgeous smile. I loved that when I looked at him, I could've been having a terrible day and just seeing him made my whole day brighter. That is my problem.

"Mira, don't cry. You still got me and I still got you. Right?" she asked again. I felt my heart grow heavy at my baby sister's perfect words. I reached down and took her hand in mine as tight as I dared. She was still staring up at me, waiting for an answer. I smiled and kissed her forehead, trying to come up with an answer.

"Right. I still got you," I answered, ignoring the bad grammar. Much time had to have passed because I heard Julia's deep breathing, signaling to me that she'd fallen asleep. I smoother her curls away from her face and watched her sleep. Her face was so peaceful since she was off in Dreamland somewhere. I truly envied her- she could sleep in a way I only wished I could. Being sick all the time screwed up my body- I could never fully shut down and sleep. I was always partly awake and hyper, trying to keep my body from overheating. Overheating was my only bloody problem. My body had gotten warmer over the years, but only by a fraction of a degree. I always wore a thin, lace dress and my hair behind my shoulders. I studied my hair in the mirror sometimes- it appeared to be almost a blonde color now. It was so light brown. It could be that I'd been spending so much time in the sun…

"Mira!" shouted someone down the hall. I recognized it as Racy's voice. She came in and half shouted my name. I covered Julia's ears so she wouldn't wake up.

"Would it kill you to be quiet?" I hissed. She made a face at me, but smiled.

"Mother wants to see you- says it's important." I nodded and gently laid Julia on my bed. She'd be okay here for a while. I glided out of the room and-

Hold on just a moment. I glided? Did I? Did I really? Yes, yes I did. Since when was I graceful? Last time I checked, I could trip over the tiniest divot in the floor. I decided not to dwell on the topic too much and headed down to my mother's informal receiving. I entered with a quiet knock and my mother looked up. She smiled sweetly, summoning me closer. I shut the door behind me and walked until I was behind her. When we were alone- she was my Mom, not the White Queen. Just my Mom.

"Whatcha doin, Mommy?' I asked quietly. I always called her that- it was a habit that I wasn't ready to kick just yet.

"Writing something. You know that boy…he's a Hightopp. What's his name?" I let out a sharp breath. It was still the same day and she expected me to be okay with just talking about him like this?

"Tarrance?" I asked, avoiding saying the name she wanted.

"No, no, his twin." I bit my lip and curled my hand into a fist so tight that my knuckles turned white. Well, they turned whiter. "Mira, love, are you okay?" she asked, honestly concerned.

"Not necessarily. His name's…his name's Tarrant. Tarrant Hightopp." I was pretty much talking to myself, but I knew she heard me. I sat in a chair next to her and tried to block his face from my mind. "What about him?" I asked breathlessly. Thinking of him so near the time we were broken apart made my heart feel empty- like there was this huge hole in my chest where he should be. It sounded cliché, but it was true.

"You miss him, don't you?" I nodded, hiding my face from my own mother. "You should go see him. Your father just left for a while. I know he just separated you two today, but go talk to your little friend. Let him know how you feel." I gently shook my head and stood up.

"Is there a reason you called me in here?" I asked, slightly annoyed. She sighed. Giving up…for now. My mother never gave up one everything. It was a trait she instinctively had; given the fact that she was Queen. She motioned for me to sit down yet again.

"I need to put you through Queen Lessons, separate from your sister. Don't ask why, just please go along with it. I'm going to be teaching you, though, not Iracebeth's teacher. Is that okay with you? I could always do it with Julia instead. We just need a well informed Lady in Waiting. I suppose," she added in a whisper," it's not really a Lady in Waiting we need." I think she didn't want me to hear that, so I tried to forget about it as much as I could.

"Alright. When do we start?" I asked, smiling. I tried to be optimistic, but I really didn't feel right. There was a tingling in the pit of my stomach, telling me that what I was doing was wrong. I shouldn't be pretending to be happy; I shouldn't be bottling up my feelings like this. I ignored it and decided to have tea later to settle my stomach.

"Right now, love. Here's a piece of parchment- I want you to write your first vow. Don't worry; just think of whatever comes to your mind." I took a deep breath, and suddenly realized the emptiness of my stomach. I was rather hungry. For me, there's always jam yesterday and jam tomorrow, but never jam today. That's it!

I wrote in my careful cursive what I just thought. I never really like jam anyway. My mother studied the vow and smiled to herself. She seemed a little smug. I watched curiously as she pulled out her list of vows. She pointed to the first and I read with great interest.

For me, there will always be jam yesterday, jam tomorrow, but never any jam today.

I smirked, realizing that my mother must've been just like me when she was younger. I looked at her next vow and gasped.

I will do whatever it takes to protect those I love.

I looked at her with a million questions running through my mind, but she simply shook her head. "That, my dear daughter, is another story for a different night. Now, moving on, let's have a bit of fun. I want you to try the crown." What was left of my smile fell and my eyes widened as she took the precious piece of jewelry off her head and gave it to me. She looked different without anything on her hair. She didn't look like my mother.

I gently took it and studied it, tipping it backwards and forwards before I finally let it rest on my head. I knew it looked okay because my mother just kept smiling. She got up quickly and grabbed her hand mirror from the back of the room. After being handed that, I looked at myself. The crown was a soft grey, not exactly white. The pints on it were rounded out and there blue jewels in the shape of a circle evenly spaced around the whole crown. I think there was a total of about 5 or 6. In between them were curly pieces of the grey colored material. The rounded points of the crown were studded with blue jewels as well. I looked up from my reflection and saw my mother's face. Her eyes were misted with unshed tears. I was about to ask what was wrong when Racy came into the room.

"Oh Miwana, don't you look beautiful! Mother, may I try on the cwown?" she asked. Her inability to say the letter 'r' made me giggle. How did she say her own name? Wacy? Iwacebeth? They paid me no attention. Mother nodded, and Racy gently pulled the crown from my head. The moment her fingers touched it, the crown changed. It changed immensely.

Suddenly, it was thinner, pointier- like it was a weapon. The points were now studded in red rubies and there were ruby hearts evenly spaced around the crown. My mother gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "It's so pwetty!" shouted my sister. By mother's reaction, something told me we were in trouble when Racy became Queen.

Only now did I notice that her hair was becoming a little redder. Then I remembered- Iracebeth had just been proposed to. She'd yet to answer the man, but we knew she would say yes.

That man was the King of Hearts. He was a bad, bad man. My breathing became shallower, and I shoved myself out of my seat and ran back to my bedroom. One second too late, I remembered Julia was sleeping as I slammed the door and threw myself into a near-by chair, sobbing to myself. I did stop after a few minutes, but I was still shaking. I dug my face into my hands and tried to understand all of what was going on around me. I felt a tiny hand rubbing my back and saw Julia looking at me with great concern. I pulled her into my lap and buried my face in her pretty curls. She fisted my hair and cried herself. I wanted her to stop, I really did. She was crying hard enough for the two of us. It scared me.

Then again, a lot of things scared me.

Hadda get this sad-ish chapter out of the way- damn these transition chapters.