Chapter 2: Please don't leave.

So here I am lying on the floor of my apartment, LOSING MY FUCKING MIND! Adam is going to be here any fucking minute and what the fuck do I say to him? 'Yeah hey Adam I just felt like calling you in the middle of the night to start having a fucking break down and drag away from your house at 1:30 in the fucking morning, and oh yeah did I tell you, I'm fucking in love with you too!'

I cover my face with my hands, I can't fucking do this anymore. I take a deep breath and get up from the floor and check my appearance in the mirror, Oh great I look like shit! I take another deep breath and I start bawling again, I can't do this, I can't see him, I just can't!

There's a knock at the door, oh great that's probably Adam, I'm gonna open the door looking like shit, tears and make-up running down my face, wearing the same outfit I was wearing three days ago, and extremely fucked up hair. He knocks again, I don't want to open the door, but I can't just ignore him. I sigh softly and walk over to my door, unlock it, and slowly open it, and there he is standing in front of me worry and concern covering his face and pulls me into a warm tight hug.

"Oh my god I was so worried about you." He whispers softly. Then he slowly and carefully lets go of me and looks right into my eyes.

I feel more tears find their way down my cheek, he wipes them away. I bring him into my apartment, and we sit down on the couch. I stare at my feet, I can feel him staring at me, the silence is so awkward, but seriously what am I supposed to say?

I look up at him for a spilt second, his eyes tell me everything, he's worried, scared even, and something else, but I can't quite tell what it is. He grabs my hand, I can feel my cheeks heat up, and my heart beat faster. I look back down at my feet, why did I decide to call him?

"Tommy, please look at me." He pleaded. I hesitantly looked him in the eyes. "Will you tell me what happened?" His voice was calm and gentle, but you could clearly hear the concern in it.

"I-I can't tell you." I said softly.

"Why not?" He asked.

"B-because you'll never talk to me again if I tell you." I said my voice was barely audible, but he could hear me.

"Thomas Joe Ratliff why would you even think that?" he asked. I let out a shaky breath and curled up against him.

"Please don't make me tell you." I whispered softly.

"I won't," He responded in a whisper as he wrapped his arms around me, "for now." I sobbed softly into his shoulder as he held me and rubbing my back and saying things like, 'Shhh its ok Glitterbaby' and 'don't worry sweetie everything will be ok'

Then he started softly singing to me and it was enough to calm me down, my sobbing started turning into soft hiccups, and then we were just sitting there on my couch. He was still rubbing my back, but now he was just humming. I closed my eyes and leaned closer to him and I slowly drifted to sleep to the sound of his heartbeat.

I woke up I think maybe 4 hours later, the sun was just coming up. I looked up at Adam; I was still wrapped in his arms. I shift a little in his arms and he looks down at me, how long has he been awake?

"Morning Sleep Head." He says softly and brushes a strand of hair out of my face, my heart beats faster.

"Morning," I say softly, "have you been awake this whole time?"

"Yeah," He says, "couldn't sleep."

"Why not?" I ask.

"Dunno," He said sounding lost, "just got lots on my mind I guess."

I shifted again and tried to fix my hair a little but of course failed miserably, I sighed and sat back. "So," he said, "how'd you sleep?"

"Um okay….I guess." I sighed softly and shifted again, I wasn't comfortable here with Adam, it just felt awkward, and I don't know why. I sighed again and held my hand in my hands.

"What's wrong glitterbaby?" He asked softly as he lifted my head out from my hands. I looked up at him; did I mention how beautiful he looked? I softly smile touched my lips and the tension was gone.

"Nothing." I said softly, I'm not exactly lying. He was about to say something when his phone started to ring.

"Hold that thought." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. As he looked at the screen he smiled softly and answered it, "Hey baby, what's up?" It was Sauli.

I sighed softly and stared at my hands and listened to Adam talk to his boyfriend. "Okay honey, see you then, I love you, bye." I watched as he hung up his phone, put it back in his pocket, and then pull all of his attention back to me. I sighed softly, so Adam couldn't hear, he'll never love me like he loves him. I looked at the floor, and stayed silent.

"Tommy," said Adam, "Tommy are you okay?" I looked up at him trying to hide the pain in my eyes.

"I'm fine," I said softly and got up from the couch. 'Just fine.' I walked over to my kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge.

"Well okay," said Adam as he stood, "I'm gonna have to get going soon, I have to meet Sauli for breakfast." He walked closer to me. "Are you gonna be okay here by yourself?" he asked.

"Are you sure?" He asked softly.

"Yes, I'm sure." I said as I walked over to my garbage to throw away the empty water bottle. He looked unsure of my answer; I could tell by his eyes, his eyes always have everything away. I walked over to him, and put my hand on his shoulder. "Adam I'm fine, go spend time with your boyfriend, I'll be okay."

"You're positive you'll be okay?" He asked.

"Yes!" I said damn he has hard to convince, "now go." He gave me a hug goodbye and told me he's give me a call later and with that he left. I sighed to myself and walked to my bathroom, and once I looked in the mirror, I knew I had to take care of this. I took a quick shower and fixed my hair and make-up and changed my clothes, I looked into the mirror again, well at least I didn't look like some sort of creature you'd see in a monster movie.

I ran my hand through my hair and back out to my living room and started flipping through my phone. When I came across Adam's number I had to fight the urge to call him, I'm not making that mistake again. I mean well it wasn't that big of a mistake, but c'mon Adam's gonna be super nosey now and soon enough he'll figure EVERYTHING out and then it'll be all awkward between us.

My phone rang and I literally jumped of the couch, I'm such a fucking girl sometimes. I looked at the caller ID it read 'Adam' Of course. He just had to be calling me right now; I sighed and answered my phone.

"Hello?" I said softly.

"Hey Tommy," He said cheerfully, "I was just checking up on you is everything alright?"

"Yup, everything's just great." I said sarcastically.

"Tommy seriously," He said, "I'm not an idiot, what's going on?"

"Nothing," I sighed, "everything's fine."

"Tommy, you know I love you, you're like a brother to me, my best friend," He paused, "You better not be lying to me." I felt a tear roll down my cheek, I can't do this, I can't keep lying to him, it's hurting both of us, and that's the last thing I wanted to do, but then again, he said that I was his best friend, did I really want to ruin that by admitting my feelings? "Tommy, you still there?" his voice was soft, gentle, maybe he would understand if I told him how I feel.

"Adam," I tied to sound confident, but failed miserably, "I have something I need to tell you."

"What is it sweetie?" He asked.

"I can't tell you over the phone." I said softly.

"Well okay," he said softly, "do you wanna hang out tonight and you can tell me then?"

"Sure." I said slowly.

"Okay I'll pick you up at 9:00, see you tonight Glitterbaby." We hung up and I went into my room to rest, this was gonna be a long night…..

Well there ya go, Chapter 2, I'm really starting to like writing this, it's really fun, I hope to have the next chapter up within the next 2 days, sorry for the delay on this one. Anyways I hope you liked it!

~Sarah :)