Since I highly doubt that my friend, Marren liked the last chapter, I'm going to dedicate this one to her as well, since she's weird and doesn't like that kinda stuff ;) Anyways here's chapter 7 :)

Chapter 7: Regrets

I woke up to the sun streaming down on my face from the window. I turned a little, and a felt a sharp pain in my lower region, and I start to blush remember last night. I look over at Adam, he's awake, but looks like he's in a world of his own, he's been acting really weird ever since last night, did I do something wrong. He notices me staring at him; he fakes a smile, and runs a hand through his hair.

"Oh um, g-good morning." He says softly.

"Um, good morning to you, too….?" I say suspiciously, he knows I can see past his lies, but yet he still tried to fool me? Doesn't he know that I hate it when he does this? If he knows that I know what he's doing, why doesn't he just come out and tell me what's wrong? He gets up from the bed and starts to put on his clothes; he won't even look at me. What's up with him? Why won't he look at me?

"A-Adam…" I whisper.

"Yes?" he asks softly, still refusing to look at me.

"Is everything alright," I whisper, "You've been acting….strange."

"I'm fine." He snaps softly.

"Are you sure?" I asked worried.

"Yes," he pauses to sigh, "I'm sure." Once he has all of his clothes on he walks out to my living room, I quickly get out of my bed and put on my briefs and skinny jeans. I follow him out to the living room and I see him standing at the door.

"Adam." I say.

"What." He snaps.

"I-Why won't you talk to me?" I ask, He turns to look at me, my heart drops; his expression is a mix of guilt, pain, and regret. I try to tell myself it's nothing, but is it really? I've known him long enough to know when something's up, and to know what it is, but I don't want to admit what I already know. I don't want to face the truth, not anymore, I'm tired of this shit! I'm tired of running around with all these feelings and not knowing what to do, and whatever the hell Adam's thinking…..it can't be good, I can read him like a book.

He sighs softly and looks at me, I can tell he doesn't want to say what he's about to tell me.

"I never wanted to hurt anybody." He whispers.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"You know damn well what I mean," He whispers louder, "with all that's been going on all I wanted to do was make you happy, to see you smile again, I couldn't stand to see you like that, I was just trying to help, but then everything got so confusing, and god I didn't even know what I was doing." He pauses then continues, "it's just that when you told me all those things, I didn't know what to say, I mean I didn't want to hurt you so I just, god I don't know what I've gotten myself into."

I just stand there staring at him, so did he really mean what he said last night, or did he just feel sorry for me? Did he just say that so I wouldn't get hurt? Well news flash Adam, telling someone that you love them and not meaning it will hurt the person even more!

"So you didn't mean it…" I whisper

"Mean what?" He asks.

"You didn't mean it when you said you loved me, did you?" I ask.

"Well, I mean of course I love you Tommy, you're my best friend, you're like maybe a brother to me, we're so close how could I not love you, it's just I mean we both don't love each other in that way, right? I mean you're straight, I'm gay, and you're just confused that's all."

Am I hearing all of this right, did he just say I didn't love him, after I fucking admitted it to him last night! Does he seriously think that meant nothing? That I'm just confused! He's the fucking confused one. I sigh quite loudly, no, no! I'm not going to take this I'm in love with you Adam, you have to admit that, no matter how hard it is to believe, I'm bi! And you have to know that! I'm not going to go around pretending like I'm your straight little bassist, who you give meaningless kisses to on stage, no not anymore! I don't want to pretend like I'm not in love with you!

"Tommy," he whispers, "are you alright?" No I'm not alright, I'm the farthest thing from alright, I'll never be alright, at least not anymore. I sigh again.

"Yes," I whisper, "I-I'm alright." He sighs again then looks at me seriously; he only does that when he has something important to say.

"Tommy," he whispers, "can we just forget about last night, and just forget it ever happened." My heart broke as he spoke those words, I guess it really did mean nothing to him, I guess I mean nothing to him. I'll always be nothing to him; I'm just Tommy, that's all I'll ever be. He keeps staring at me, waiting for my reply, I don't think I can bring myself to say those words, I don't want to forget about it, I don't want to pretend it never happened. I sighed again and tried to hold back my tears, I have to be strong, I can't let him see me cry, I can't let him know I'm not okay.

"Y-yeah," I whisper, "we can just forget about it." He smiles a little, his expression turns to relief, mine doesn't change at all. He reaches towards the door, but then turns around and looks at me.

"Tommy," he says, "we're still friends right, I mean what happened won't change anything right?" I sigh sadly then look up at him; I put my hand on his shoulder.

"We're still friends," I whisper, "remember nothing ever happened between us." He smiles a little at then then gives me a pity hug, and leaves. Then I am leaning against my wall, door wide open, balling my fucking eyes out.

Well there ya go! :D Depressing right? I kind of feel in a depressed mood so ya my writing reflects my mood, I've ran into a little bit of heartbreak lately so ya, I just wanted to let my feelings out, but don't worry, it'll all get better! :) Every story that I write has a happy ending….most of the time…MWAHAHA! :D Anyways I hope you liked it! :)

~Sarah