"Hey! Stop that! You're cheating!"

"No I'm not! Your letting me win."

"Hey! I said stop that! I wanted it!"

I tried with all my might to yank the stuffed elephant I had been eyeing ever since we got in the arcade. Of course, Ivan overpowered me and shoved me to the ground like the brute he is. Well, no, I'm lying.

"-Plunk-. OW!"

I actually tripped backwards during our tug-of-war struggle, land on my butt real hard. He could have caught me though!

I really hate it when he beats me in the claw machine and takes the prize I almost won.

"See you at the basketball hoops!" he squeaked as he skipped away, happily clutching on to the stuffed animal that should be mine! I sit on a seat nearby, poofed out.

Ivan and I are in the arcade area of the movie theaters we often go to. I've never been in a movie theater till Ivan brought me along. I would rather watch a movie for free on TV of course. But he always looks at me with that face 'wanna come to the movies with me?' Sigh. I always say yes. Because I never know I'm going till we're here in the parking lot mostly. I never usually had any money with me, so he'd pay for me. Quite generous of him, this is why I never really debated about 'we could watch a movie for free at your home'.Even then he wouldn't listen to me.

Though I've never come to the movies with him with anyone else. I hear he comes a lot with a lot of different friends, including some that are friends with me. Like Matthew! And . . . Arthur.

I slump over and tighten my face expression. Thinking about Arthur always makes me angry, frustrated, and pretty sad. Thinking about him makes me feel bad. I don't understand why.

"Hey moron get over here!" cried out Ivan. Embarrassed, I don't answer back, but I walk to the direction of Ivan's voice. I like being with Ivan, it distracts me from Arthur and having any thoughts of him.

I spot him easily by the bathroom. He sticks out like a sore thumb really. Might be the big unnecessary coat or white hair. Hmm.

"Bathroom?" I ask with an annoyed voice.

"Yeah. I need to use it. C'mon!" he pulls on my arm inside.

"Since when did I become your bathroom buddy?" I ask lazily as he half-drags me inside.

"Ah! You say it like I've done it forever! Stop complaining."

"Well I'm sorry. I haven't grown immune to the scent of piss. But at this rate I will, and I have you to thank," I mumble as I cross my arms, almost sulking as I walk over to the sink area and stare down the drain of one. I feel wrong being in a guy's bathroom now. Isn't because I like a dude or anything, I just notice things a lot more . . . in ways I shouldn't be. Thanks a lot Arthur.

"Aww, someone's PM-essing."

"SHUT UP! I am not!" I yell embarrassed. He can be so embarrassing sometimes.

"Then why are you yelling?" he said turning his head, still doing his business.

"Because you are saying these things in public areas, and I'm no woman to be told that either!"

"Well you should be. You'd make a good woman. You have sissy and sensitive down pretty good," he laughed.

I growl and decide to stomp out without him.

"That darn jerk! Who does he think he is?" I mutter to myself as I head for some seats outside the lounge area. I find a rather lonesome spot and sit.

Sigh. But seriously, what the hell am I doing here? Shouldn't I be locked at home, whining about how my love life is hopelessly screwed up?

I feel my pocket vibrate. I take out Ivan's phone. It's my boss.

"Oh shit, I forgot to tell him I was going out," I mutter. I glance around, alright, coast clear to answer.

"Hell-?"

"WHERE ARE YOU? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE GOING OUT? !" yelled my boss at the other end.

"Geez calm down. I-"

"Who are you with?"

"Um-"

"Who are you wi-? !"

"Kiku. He wanted to come watch the new Disney movie!" I laughed nervously. I hope he buys the lie.

"Alright then. Get back as soon as possible so I can get my hands on your neck and choke you for skipping out on work again."

"G-gotcha."

I slide the phone back in my pocket. Currently, I'm not allowed to be around Ivan right now. I have no idea about his boss though. It seems like he likes me, but then I hear his boss doesn't like others I like.

"There you are! Don't disappear on me again!" said Ivan as he walked up to me.

"Right, why would I wanna do that now?" I say making a twisted smile.

"I'm sorry what was that?"

"N-nothing."

"Good, c'mon, the fifth movie is about to start!"

"Can we leave already? My boss is going to k-"

He grabs my hands and proceeds to lead me into a hallway, where a large movie screen awaits us. The fifth movie this night too. I could probably bolt out, with his phone call someone, get picked up, and get home before my boss gets any angrier. But I never do. I do enjoy making these wild plans in my head though.

We walk past some young kids, probably taller than me none the less, and take our seats in the dark room, right in the center of a row in the center of the large movie screening room. Why can't we ever sit up in a higher row?

"Food?" asks Ivan shoving a bag of popcorn at me. Where'd that come from?

"N-no thanks," I frown pushing it away.

"Want something? I can pay for it," he asks. I raise my hand.

"N-no thanks, I'm cool," I say as the previews start.

I really am quite hungry, but I will feel really bad. Already paid my ticket, I can't possibly ask for more. I glance at the large popcorn bucket he holds. I lick my lips. Shoot, I should have said yes. If I try to reach for any during the movie, he might think I'm trying to touch him inappropriately. Tch, as if! These hands shall touch no one but those I love!

Like Arthur? Some small whisper from my head asked.

I slump in my seat, feeling depressed again.

Head I thought we established he's dead to me! I yell back to whatever voice in my head had spoken.

Yet you still think about him all the time.

I clutched on my forehead and growled; I feel so stupid arguing with myself.

After the movie, Ivan and I wait outside for his boss to pick us up. Why can't we wait inside with the wonderful AC and safer environment, I'll never understand. As we sit, I stare at my hands. I feel him stare at the side of my head.

"Yes?" I ask feeling a little agitated.

"Gosh, someone's being mean," he replies. I can't help to hear his voice actually sound offended. I feel my eyebrow twitch.

"Just because I answered with a little sass doesn't make me mean," I mutter, not turning around.

"You don't have to be so mean about it."

"Well you were staring at me."

"I was just looking at you."

"Well stop it; it's giving me the creeps."

"Sorry, sheesh," he mutters. I feel my eyebrow twitch again at hearing that offended voice that sounds so unnecessary. If he thinks I'm going to pretend to be happy even though I'm stressed out right now he's got it all wrong. He has his phone again, so he starts playing a cell phone game. I look at my boots, feeling a little left out. Movies, theaters, they're social places. You go to them, watch a movie, have a good time, and talk. We'll we did the watching movie part. Talk? We sure did, but usually 'talk' in a movie theater is actual meaningful interaction.

"That's it?" I ask, hoping she knows what I mean by that.

"What's it?" he repeats.

"-Sigh- Never mind," I mutter. I look around. We're surrounded by people, all in their little social clicks. It's very dark outside. The lampposts make it look so safe to be out so late. I glance at the side walk we are sitting nearby. Lots of cars passing by, picking young lads up. I begin to think about people, the whole world. How unique it is where I live and what I do. I glance at my lap, at my hands. I feel the gloves on them. I think the word 'protect'. That's what they're for. To protect my hands from the cold.

I think about how people protect others. I look back at the groups of teenagers. I feel like I'm admiring them. They're alive and having a good time. We're all alive. I'm alive. What have I done with my life so far? Well doesn't matter. Everyone's going to die anyway. I'm going to die someday. I wonder what things I still have to do in my life. Or, what things I want to do. I'd like to go to Disney World. Eat so much I actually throw up. Shake my favorite celebrities' hand. Tell Arthur I had feelings for him. Or do. I don't really know anymore.

"Hey Alfred! C'mon! I said my boss is here!" said Ivan one last time, shaking my shoulder furiously. Instead of snapping at him like I'd like to, I just follow him into a black vehicle. I sit in the back seat.

"Good evening," I say to his boss. I stare for a good 10 seconds waiting for some acknowledgement of some kind that he heard me, a simple nod will do. Nothing. I usually get a response 1 out of 10 attempts.

He sits next to his boss in the front. I feel a little sad; I really like it when the person I'm with sits next to me. I always do if I'm riding in my car with my boss. Oh well. I stare back at the laughing teenagers again. I find myself smiling almost. A reassuring feeling swells up inside me. Everything will be alright in the end. Whatever I do will lead to something, will always lead to something. That is to exist, to feel alive.

Wow, I should really stop thinking so hard in the parking lot of a movie theater. I say to myself embarrassed now. I glance back at Ivan's boss.

"Straight to his home?" asks his boss looking at Ivan. Ivan can't hear though, he is listening to his IPod too loudly again that I myself can hear it myself over the blasting AC.

After the third attempt at asking him, I just poke at his boss's shoulder.

"Yes, my home . . . please," I add in meekly. He weakly smiles at me and proceeds to drive in a freeway. I sort of recline awkwardly against the door and use my arm as a pillow. I feel very sleepy and tired. I close my eyes and easily fall asleep.

Ivan has been . . . a big addition to my life. Yeah that seems like the right word.

I sit patiently in his room. He's taking so damn long. I decide to lie on the floor. Gee I hope it's clean. After walking in his home so many times and seeing so much paperwork and questionable metal tools everywhere, I really do worry about lying my head on the floor.

I sit back on his bed. Not made. Typical. Of course, my bed isn't made often either. I cover my nose. A sour perfume overwhelms my nose. Or is it dried blood somewhere from a dead corpse? He's probably got a corpse somewhere here, I know it! The place always smells so odd to me.

"Alfred?" he asks stepping into his room. He must be surprised to see me sitting in the dark with a blanket over my head.

"What?" I ask.

"Oh. Well, what would you like to do today?"

Frankly, I don't even know why I bother coming to his home. I get in trouble with my boss, Ludwig bitches at me for being around Ivan, and I am still stressed. I don't think it's wrong for being in the company of friends to cheer me up from my gloomy state, but sometimes I get the feeling Ivan expects me to be cheery and wonderful all the time to him. Ludwig says he takes advantage of me so it's all fair. But I let myself be taken advantage of, whatever that means. So who really is at fault here?

"Um, I'd like to watch a movie," I say.

"Alright, oh I know! Let's go watch the new scary horror one with lots of guts and brains and alien zombies! You know this one boy told me I am just like the evil super villain! Isn't that cool? I think it is! He also said I-!"

We hear a door bell ring.

Thank god, my ears are spared.

Ivan walks off to go answer the door.

I enjoy not having to talk a lot around Ivan. He can probably carry out a whole conversation with me just nodding in response. But then he shakes me for a response at times. I zip my jacket all the way up and put it over my head to sleep. I lay back on his bed. Then I feel a yank at my boot.

"What?" I ask not moving.

"I thought you were dead," says Ivan.

Please how stupid is that.

"Trust me, I wouldn't bother to die in your home, it's too low class for me," I say.

"Bigger than yours," he says.

"Hey! At least mine is-!" I bolt up from lying on his bed; unzip my jacket to yell at him, when I see a strange fellow looking at me.

"Wh-?'

"Her name is Natalia," says Ivan, "she's that girl I was telling you about," he adds in, a little spooked.

I stare at the girl. She seems annoyed, angry and bored at the same time. I keep staring at her, surprised. She stares back at me with a weird interest and fascination of some sort.

"I'll be back," says Ivan leaving us alone.

I stare back at Natalia. She must be the girl Ivan has been telling me about. The one he has a weird relationship with. They used to get along so well, but now it's sort of weird because Ivan is disturbed by her. He told me some stuff and asked me to keep it a secret. But then I found out he told Matthew too. And then Kiku. So it really isn't a secret anymore is it? He just wants us to know but not talk to each other about it. That itself is sort of weird. And very self-conscious.

"My name is Natalia," says the girl, sticking her hand out at me. I sort of scoot a little farther back on the bed. She has her other arm resting on the bed, near a sensitive place. I swallow hard.

"Alfred, Alfred Jones," I smile as I shake her hand.

"I like science and sleep late," she says, probably trying to start up a conversation. My smile grows a little more confident.

"I like to make things and sleep," I say laughing.

"Are you my friend?" she asks.

"Sure," I reply quickly. Why wouldn't I be?

"What are you doing?" asks Ivan walking in with three glasses, looking at us with a confused expression.

"Getting along?" I smile.

Natalia takes two glasses and hands me one. We both start drinking at the same time.

Wow, such a nice girl. Where is all the 'evil' Ivan spoke to me about? He must have made it up. He couldn't though, why would he make up such a thing?

The three of us begin to watch TV in Ivan's living room. She is sitting in the same couch as me. Ivan, as always, sits on the large, single-person couch.

"Ha-ha! You think so? I'm no good," I tell Natalia as she looks thru some drawings I made.

"Yes, they are very good. Better than Ivan's," she says turning to him and giving him an odd glare.

"Really?" I ask. It makes me a little happy. I take my drawings back in my hand and look thru them. I feel Natalia looking at me as I smile, looking shuffling thru my drawings. I wonder what is it about them she liked.

"You should teach Ivan a few things," she says. I think that might have offended Ivan a bit.

"Oh please, I can do anything better than that fool," he replies. I don't pay him any attention though.

Ivan gets up and walks off, probably getting more popcorn or something. Natalia hands me the remote he left on his seat.

"Change the channel, I don't like this," she says.

"But, he wanted to watch this," I say as I grab the remote form her hand.

"We're guests. We decided what to watch. After all, don't you get bad reception at your rural home out in the country?" she asks.

"I don't even get a signal," I say totally convinced. I click thru the channels. I hear Ivan come back and out of the corner of my eye I see him stand for 10 seconds, stunned at what now appeared in the new screen. We begin watching an old cartoon. I and Natalia are very into it. Ivan finally sits down quietly. He stays quiet the whole time.

About two hours later, it's time for me to leave.

"Let me lead you to my front gate," smiles Ivan as he almost pushes me out of his home. We are about to head for the gate, when he closes the front door behind him and turns to me.

"Isn't she odd?" he asks.

"Odd? She's great!" I reply. He doesn't seem to listen to my response.

"She has done so many odd things. I get bad vibes from her," he says.

I get bad vibes from you.

"Well, I think she's swell."

"I don't really want her to stay. Even my boss thinks she's odd."

Then don't invite her over.

"She just comes and stays for long periods of time," he says.

Then tell her she can't come.

"She smells weird too."

What?

"Well I think that's just you. I think you smell odd," I say a little offended for Natalia.

"What? How?" he asks.

"I don't know. You just do. Anyways, I think you're just imagining things," I say crossing my arms.

"What?" he asks. He sounds like he wanted me to also think all those things.

"I don't know what's going on or what went on between you and her, but as long as I get along with her, I don't care what you say. Unless she's killed someone. Or done something terrible to someone I know," I say almost scolding him.

I feel he wants me on his side.

"But don't you remember what I told you?" he asks me. He means the things Natalia has done to him.

I question his credibility. I question his sincerity. I question what he might have done that caused Natalia to do whatever he says was 'wrong'. When Ivan tells things we do or I have 'done' to him to people, they don't come out accurate and sometimes plain outrageous. This is why I won't really trust him on whatever things he tells me about people, and certainly Natalia.

"Well I don't know what has happened between you two, but it's none of my business. You should deal with it yourself and not get me on your side if you have such a big problem with it," I say a little upset and walk the rest of the way to the gate by myself.

As I see my car and open the front door, I glance back at his home. I see him still standing there, looking at me a little disappointed, and sort of serious which is rare, and I see Natalia peeking thru the window. She must have heard everything. Or know I just got thru arguing with him. As I step in my car and shut the door, I begin to question Natalia's innocence. She seems unmoved by whatever I and Ivan talked about. She seems to almost know what we discussed though. It does not change anything I think of her; I just begin to feel a little sorry for Ivan having to argue with me in front of this 'evil' girl he seems to claim is true. That's pretty all I feel for him nowadays.

a/n: review~! : )