This is a dream. I know it's a dream. But why can't I say it's a dream? I can't say the sentence. It seems I can only speak when it means something in this dream.
I look around my surroundings. I see a rather large building, the shape of a beautiful castle almost. It's a college. Or university. How beautiful. It's so breathtaking, I love it! Wait, what's this? Why am I the only one here?
"Let's head into this direction," says a voice from nowhere grabbing onto my arm. I look down at myself. I'm wearing strange clothes. I'm pretty sure this is not my typical sense of style. Either I'm older in this dream or this is crazy.
"Arthur?" the man holding on to my arm is Arthur. I look at him completely baffled. How strange of him to be holding onto my arm.
"Where are we going?" I ask.
"To class. We're going to be late again. Thanks to me. Sorry," he says. I blush. He said sorry to me. He's rarely nice like this, so it makes me feel nervous.
"He's coming with me," says somebody else, grabbing onto my other arm. I turn to see another young man cling to my arm. He glares at Arthur. He seems mad.
"Look pal, I don't know who you think you are, but you better let go," demands Arthur as we stop walking. The other man sticks his tongue out. I seem to feel like I know him.
"Let me speak to him Arthur."
"Alright," he says.
"Privately," I say and shove the other boy to another direction. Under some stairs I grab the boy's shoulders.
"What do you think you're doing?" I ask angrily.
"Me? What are you doing with that asshole? You said he treated you bad, and here you are getting chummy. You're with me right now, so tell him to back off," said the boy. I can't seem to look away from those pretty green eyes.
"Look, you and I were never official. I never said I'd stay with you."
Why am I saying this? Does this mean I was with this boy? In a relationship?
"We're together, you said," said the boy.
"I like Arthur, not you," I force myself to say.
I don't understand the words coming out of my mouth. I really don't mean any of this. I have no idea what I'm speaking about. This must be a dream. In dreams, sometimes I say things I don't understand like this place we're in right now. Why am I dreaming this?
"That's not true, you said it yourself," says the boy.
"Look, I-"
The boy grabs my face and shoves his mouth to mine to get me to shut up. After a few seconds I shove him away.
"Stop doing that! You're such a stalker!" I yell angrily.
A stalker? What am I talking about?
I walk off; well my feet make me walk off. I would have wanted to stay and told the boy I'm sorry, but, I don't seem to have control of my own body in this dream.
Far away, I see Arthur waiting for me. He smiles at me, seeing me come by myself. I can't seem to look past his smile. Everything else seems blurry into comparison. I keep walking to him. I feel a smile in my own face.
Then, I feel wet. A liquid pouring down my chest. I cough once. I touch my chest. It is blood. I turn to see behind me. It's the boy, holding a gun right at me a good meter away. He seems terrified. He must have wanted to shoot at Arthur. I run towards Arthur, to protect him from the bullets. I grab his waist; I fall to my knees, unable to stand. I look up to him.
"R-run," I utter. I want to cry now. I'm terrified.
He is still smiling at me, looking down at me now.
"RUN!" I yell as loud as I could.
He still stands there, grinning down at me. I look at him mortified.
What's going on? Why won't you move? Why won't you . . . ?
I turn back to see the other young man hold his gun up and shooting at our direction. I feel something warm hit me in the back another two times. I clutch harder at Arthur's clothes.
He seems confident no harm will come to him, because I'm in the way. He seems confident that I will never let anything bad happen to him. He seems confident that . . . I will never leave him.
I look angrily into his smile.
I will not let this man take advantage of me anymore.
I let go of his clothes. I slump to the ground. I see his smile turn into a twisted frown. I see his mouth open as bullets land on his chest.
He looks at me; I still can't see his eyes. Only his awkward frown.
"Why?" he seems to whisper. Why did I leave his side?
I find I can now finally smile.
We both drop to the ground. I cover the wounds in my chest.
All I can seem to think as I lie there dying is that I let him get hurt too.
I've spoiled him too much with the security that I will always be there for him.
Not anymore.
I feel alleviated. I take a big breathe of air in. It hurts, in a good way.
This must be to really live.
I close my eyes and wake up from my dream.
I sit up in my bed; stare at the window, the trees, and the warm sunlight reaching my bed. The birds chirp so wonderfully. I look at my hands, as if to see blood. No blood. I feel wonderful. I let him get hurt, and I feel wonderful. He finally felt pain, the same pain I felt. And that makes me happy.
I wasn't suffering alone anymore.
I gurgle and spit the minty water into my sink. I have a lot of cleaning to do. I look up at the mirror to check my reflection.
I can't seem to stop feeling relief and happiness.
I let him feel the same pain I was. I've never done that before, in real life or dream.
I leave my bathroom to find some fresh chore-friendly clothes.
As I brush my hair back, scanning the living room and then glance at the cleaning products I took out from the kitchen under the sink, I notice there's a blue piece of paper on the table. I frown at it.
"I don't remember that being there," I say as I grab a broom and begin sweeping the ground. I can get to that later.
A while into sweeping, I feel my stomach gurgle a little. I haven't eaten since yesterday morning. It's not like me. I pay no mind to it as I continue sweeping and dusting my home.
Something doesn't seem right. It's not Toris's absence. There's something wrong with all of this.
I stop sweeping and look around my living room.
Yao and Roderich. I had a dream seeing them in my home. Why?
I look at the floor again and spot something blue. A piece of fabric. I grab at it. I don't have anything this blue. I glance back at the paper on my table. I pick it up and sit on my couch.
It's a coupon?
An ice cream coupon.
I lick my lips.
Free ice cream sounds like something awesome right about now.
I look at my phone.
Kiku usually likes to go out with me. Kiku plus his car equals free ice cream.
I roll over the floor and grab my phone, I knock it down and jab my arm at it in desperate hunger. I dial Kiku's phone number as fast as I can.
"KIKU! KIKU!" I yell as I hear the dial tone end.
"What is it?" asked Kiku on the other end unmoved by my urgency.
"Let's go to the mall," I say in a low almost creepy voice. Malls have lots of ice cream for me and electronics for Kiku.
"I thought you were recovering and needed complete isolation," said Kiku.
"I'm a masochist. Now can we go?" I ask eagerly.
"As good as it's going to get huh? Let me go get ready," said Kiku hanging up. I hang up my phone too.
"Alright! FREE ICE CREAM HERE I COME!" I yell as I dash upstairs to change. It seems I have completely forgotten about the pictures I was developing.
Oh well.
"Stop bouncing around."
"I'm excited, what can you except?"
"Over free ice cream."
"You want to buy me some?"
"I'll keep quiet."
Kiku was driving us in his fancy new black car to the mall. It was a long way's way from my home that's for sure. I rarely go to the city. I sat beside him in the front seat. This is so exciting, going to the mall just for the sake of free food! I tap my pocket to make sure I still have the ticked with me. It said unlimited number of scoops. Who can argue with that?
We get off the free way and start entering the parking lot.
"Don't tell Ludwig I came with you, understand?" asked Kiku.
"Why?" I asked confused.
"He'll kill me. He said you really should get time alone."
I see it pointless to tell him about my dream.
We finally start to park. Outside, it still looks a little cloudy from the rain from last night, but all in all the same mildly cold weather.
"ICE CREAM! !" I yell bolting out of Kiku's car the second the vehicle stopped moving. I felt a pang of pain hit me in the back.
"I don't think so," says Kiku as he picks up the wrapped sword he always seems to carry as he walks away from me.
"S-sorry," I mumble as I slowly walk behind him crying a little.
The two of us step inside the East entrance. Before I can bolt ahead, I feel something ache around my waist.
"I'm not letting you out of my sight," said Kiku as he held on a plastic holder. He had tied me with one of those things you put around pet animals.
"Kiku! C'mon!" I squeak trying to run off from him, but find it hard to.
"Let's go over here. I've been meaning to buy a new camera," said Kiku as he with ease dragged me across the floor. I let myself be dragged, crossing my arms. He must have drunk a lot of coffee this morning to be able to drag me across the floor.
I finally stand up as we walk into an electronic store. He clips me to the kart he picks and proceeds to push it farther into the store. Out of the corner of my eye I see Feliciano also clipped to a kart. I also spot Ludwig looking through the new DVDs. I poke Kiku and point straight at them. His face goes all white, same as mine.
"Walk back slowly," muttered Kiku as he and I head back to where we came from the entrance. We decide to head the opposite way from them.
"Maybe clothes shopping will be best," he mumbled as he walked ahead of me. I was busy looking around to anything that resembled the shape of an ice cream cone till I felt another yank at my waist. I turned to see Kiku staring into a clothing store. It had a long foreign name with upside down letters. It was probably a Russian store no doubt. Kiku ran inside, yanking me with him as he unnoticing pulled hard on the rope still strapped around my waist.
He stopped to a wax figure displaying a white suit. I fixed my glasses as I cached my breath.
No, scratch that, a white coat.
"Oh Kiku-"
"I need it," he said as he rubbed his left cheek against the fabric.
"You don't need another white coa-"
He pressed his hand to the back of my head and shoved my face to the fabric.
"Oh my Lord you totally need to buy this," I said as I rubbed my face on the fabric.
An attendant appeared out of nowhere and poked Kiku's shoulder. She demonstrated a whole selection of different colors behind us. I saw Kiku's jaw drop as he dashed for the coats. I glance to the lady who's grin is making me feel uneasy.
Above the coat there's a 50% off tag. I glance back at where Kiku ran at. I see him fighting off other men and women for the coats. I look back at the lady. Touché.
Then, it occurs to me that Kiku has let go of the rope.
I double check. Yup, the rope is on the floor. I untie it. I glance at Kiku. Surely this would take him more than 2 hours. I dashed outside the store and began my search for the food stands and a look-out for Ludwig.
After running around for five minutes, I notice that above me signs of where the food court is located are pointed out to me. I take in a deep breath, feeling so stupid. I glance around. I start noticing lots of small children with rather large ice cream cones. I smile. I'm close.
I run again to where the arrows lead me to my sweet ice cream!
Alfred.
I suddenly hault.
Alfred, what are you doing?
Getting ice cream, answered back Alfred into his mind. He looked around, as if Alfred's thoughts could be heard by the people around him.
Alfred, why did you let me get hurt? Why? Asked a hurt voice. Arthur's hurt voice.
Alfred clenched his teeth. He rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed for some reason.
Alfred, why did you hurt me like that? The voice repeated in his mind.
Alfred bit his lip and began running again.
No, get out of my head! I've had it with you! You only bring me sadness! Yelled Alfred in his head.
You bring it on yourself. Replied the voice.
Alfred found a free seat and sat down. He breathed heavily, as if he'd ran for a long distance, looking down at the floor over his knees he rested his body on.
Stupid weird thoughts.
He glanced up. He saw a big 'Food Court' sign. He glanced at the counter near him. It was in fact an ice cream shaped counter. Alfred's face brightened up. The sight of his most favorite food gave him enough power to ignore his thoughts. He walked up to the counter at the lady with a hat shaped like an ice cream cone. She did not seem amused to have this job. Nor did Alfred really care.
"I would like the biggest bowl you have, with as many scoops you can fit in it, with as much toppings you can possibly put on it, with the hottest fudge you've got," smiled Alfred. The lady, emotionless and obviously tired of her job just looked at him.
"That'll be-"
"Wait! I have a coupon that say's I can get whatever I want for free!" said Alfred shoving thru his pockets.
"Riight," said the lady with a monotone response.
Alfred began to panic. He checked both pockets, but no ticket. He then checked his coat's pockets. He felt a piece of paper. Delighted and relieved, he slammed the ticket on the counter with such confidence.
"I'll have it to go my good lady-!"
"This is expired," said the woman looking at the ticket.
"What?" asked Alfred, not understanding such a sentence.
"Right here, expired a year ago almost. Besides, this is a birthday gift card. I'm sure it isn't your birthday, you must be some lonely guy if it is, a rather stupid lonely guy at that," said the lady. Alfred held up the ticked to his face. In tiny print, it was pretty clear it had expired.
"I . . . see," mumbled Alfred defeated as he slumped forward and retreated away. He shoved the ticket down his pocket. He must be a pretty hungry stupid fool to think a random ticket he found at his table to actually be something so good.
As closed his jacket's pocket, he saw something small and blue fall. A piece of fabric. Where had that come from?
Out of curiosity he picked it up. He randomly looked up to see if anyone had been observing his journey of stupidity and humiliating antics. He then spotted a young boy, a little younger looking that him perhaps, sitting on the table he had previously been sitting at. The boy had short blond hair up to his shoulders. His green, shiny and beautifully delicate emerald eyes staring down at a bowl of ice cream he poked at with a silver spoon. The boy then looked down at Alfred, who was still bending over clutching the blue cloth in his hand. Alfred's face flushed red. He then turned away abruptly as he noticed he had been staring at the boy with his jaw latterly dropped. He was about to walk away, his pride damaged enough already for the day, when he heard a quiet chuckle. He turned to the boy.
"Would you like some? I'm afraid I'm not all that hungry for something so cold," smiled the blond boy at Alfred. He felt his heart pound loud as the boy blinked, almost delicately, to him. Alfred glanced around.
"Yes you with the glasses and brown jacket, I'm speaking to you," chuckled the boy again as he lifted his vanilla covered spoon at Alfred. Alfred felt a weak smile come to his face.
"S-sure," he said still a little embarrassed. He swallowed hard as he sat across the boy. His stupid smile hadn't gone away, he felt too shy to move.
"Here," said the boy handing the spoon he had been playing with to Alfred. Alfred reached and grabbed it. He felt his heart grow louder as he touched the boy's hand at receiving the spoon. He didn't bother to ask whether the boy had eaten from the spoon. Alfred didn't care. He shoved the spoon into the bowl of ice cream, not taking his eyes from the young man.
"It's alright, eat right away," smiled the young boy at Alfred. Completely reassured, Alfred finally smiled confidently back as he dug into the bowl.
"My name is Alfred, Alfred Jones," smiled Alfred thru a stuffed mouth of fruit.
The young boy grinned as he rested his head on a palm, his arm resting on the table.
"My name is Vash. Vash Zwingli."
At that moment, the whole world seemed dim and dull in comparison to Vash's wonderful smile.
a/n: review~! : )