I got him ice for his ankle, and went in the kitchen to make lunch. I hoped that once he was out of pain he would be more agreeable to eating.
Because it was nice out, I opened the windows as I cooked lunch, a steak with mushroom sauce. He was going to eat well. He needed to eat. He looked so sick and malnourished. Helping him up off the stairs, I'd been able to feel far too many bones.
"What are you making?" he called from the living room. His back was to me because of where I'd helped him.
"Steak," I said. "Is there anything I can get you?"
"No," he said. "It smells good."
I was definitely confused by this sudden change in his demeanor, but I was going to roll with it. A balmy breeze wafted in through the open windows and I was so glad it was almost summer.
About half an hour later, lunch was ready. I arranged it on a plate, proud of my work, and presented it to him. He ate ravenously, and I gave him my portion when he was done. He needed it more than me, and there was plenty of other food for me to eat when he was done.
When he was done, however, he didn't retreat back into his office. I made myself a sandwich and sat down on the couch across from him. "Are we done playing games?" I asked him.
He nodded. "I think so," he said.
"If we can cooperate, things will be a lot easier," I told him. "I'm not going to baby you, but I'm not going to let you go on in pain needlessly, and I'm not going to let you starve to death on my watch. What you do with the rest of your time isn't my business, as long as you're not doing anything stupid...but I'm not going to struggle with you."
"Sounds good to me," he told me. I held his eye contact for a long moment. I was so thoroughly confused by this. "My daughter will be here later."
"I'll make extra dinner then," I said, standing up. I didn't know Lily very well, but she had always seemed nice enough.
Harry got up as well, and started to slowly ease his way from the room. As he was passing through the door he said something to me and was gone before I could respond. It took a second but then it registered. "I like you, I think you pass the test." What did that mean?
Keeping busy was my main priority. There was so much to do, and when I started to tick things off a to-do list, time flew by. Before I knew it, the bathrooms were all clean and dinner was almost ready. Plus I had made cookies for dessert.
Lily blew in like a lost wind. She was full of stories of chaos and Quidditch. Her team was doing great, apparently, and she was getting ready to leave for a few weeks of traveling for games. It was the first time I saw Mr. Potter truly smiling. He was in such a great mood that I could hardly believe that he was the same man from yesterday.
After she was done telling him about some hi-jinks her flat mates had been up to, I told them dinner was ready. I had tried to avoid them as much was as possible, to give them privacy. It was a little hard though. The house was very open. I could imagine it when the children were little and the house was busy with activity. A young Al would have sat happily in the overstuffed chair Mr. Potter had a liking for, nose deep in one of his books. It was easy to imagine a house full of love and happiness.
"How're you doing, Norah?" Lily asked as she pranced into the kitchen. "Al said you were here."
"I'm doing quite all right, thank you," I said, smiling. "and yourself?"
She nodded and smiled, helping her father to his chair. I wasn't quite sure what to do about his ankle, given that his bones were weak enough. I didn't think a little Skelegrow would do much to help him. Dinner was good and I thought both Lily and I were pleased when her father took a second helping of rice. Progress was finally being made. After his earlier comment, I couldn't help but wonder if yesterday was a bit of a put-on to test my limits though.
Still, I was pretty sure he had more food to eat today than he'd had all week.
"I talked to James this morning," Lily prattled on. She was always talking, but it wasn't annoying. I just had to wonder how she breathed. "He said that he and Kat and the kids are going to come visit you this weekend. Would you like that, Dad? I mean, if you're up to it, of course."
He nodded, though I saw a shadow of something else cross his face. It clicked in my mind, but I would wait to bring it up until we were alone. "I'd love to see them," he said. He used his wand to summon the plate of cookies to right in front of himself, which caused both Lily and I to laugh.
I was actually really fond of this new Mr. Potter. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be here for awhile.
~.~
After Lily had gone, I got him settled in the living room. I got a fire going in the fireplace because it was a little chilly, and allowed him one glass of wine. Too much alcohol would react badly with the potion I'd given him earlier, but a small glass wouldn't hurt him.
It was then I took the magazine I'd bought earlier into the living room and sat on the couch.
"Who are you, Norah?" he asked.
I thought that was a very odd question, so I sat up straighter. There was a brief moment of panic, as I wondered if the wine had made him go mad already. "What?" I asked.
"You've been living in my home a few days now and I know next to nothing about you," he told me.
The breath of air that had frozen in my lungs escaped through my mouth in a large sigh, and I sat back again. "I went to school with Al," I told him. "Well, James and Lily too, but Al and I were in the same year."
When I remembered Lily had been a Hufflepuff, I remembered to add "And the same House, as well."
He nodded. "I know, you've said that before," he said. "But that doesn't really tell me who you are. Where did you come from?"
"Grew up in Wales," I told him.
"So that's why your accent's funny," he said.
I laughed. I didn't get called out about that often. "I moved to London when I was nine for my dad's work. Parents are both Magical. I've got an older sister named Jenna. That's who I lived with before I moved in here. She's got two girls, Phoebe and Cara, ages six and nine."
"No job?" he asked, adjusting his glasses.
"I'm a Healer," I told him. "or, was. I got laid off about four months ago... Not because I did anything wrong. It was just because I was the newest person in my department. And there aren't many places to Heal in Great Britain, so when Al talked to me about this, I took it."
"No boyfriend?" he asked.
"No boyfriend." I confirmed, hoping my tone made it clear that I wasn't going into that any further now.
"No children?" he asked. He was full of questions tonight, but I gladly traded it for a general nice attitude.
"Some day..." I told him. I was twenty eight, and sure, most of my friends had children, but I wasn't there yet. Eventually, I would be settled down and decide to bring someone else into the world. But for now, I was content to be by myself.
"Y'know," he said. "I've got a single son, you may or may not have met him, his name's Al. Scrawny git, like his dad, but he's got a good heart."
I couldn't help it, I had to laugh. I was glad to hear him chuckling along. "Thank you," I said. A few moments of silence passed. "So tell me about yourself."
"Nothing to know," he said. "You've probably heard it all before."
"Oh?" I asked. "Where would I have?"
"Tabloids, Witch Weekly, Al..." he listed off. I watched as he tilted his glass and drained the wine glass.
"Al never, ever talked about you at school," I told him. "at least not to me."
"Fine," he said. He cleared his throat. "Well, you know, defeated Voldemort when I was young."
"That's incredible," I said, quietly. There was a whole year in school devoted to learning about the wars, and sometimes it was hard to wrap my head around. The poor, seventeen year old kid that had been in charge of ending it all was now this frail man in front of me.
"Not really," he told me. "I didn't know any better. It just was."
"Then what? There have been many years since then."
"Married my soul mate," he said. "When I was twenty one and she was twenty, after she was promoted to a starting player for the Holyhead Harpies. Lived the life of a Quidditch husband for a few years until she retired before we had James. I was an Auror then. Then we had Albus and Lily and decided to stop there. We had our hands full and had no desire to have a Quidditch team."
I laughed at that. It was getting even easier to picture the house full of children in a happy, loving family. It was a really nice thought.
"Then... they grew up, obviously," he said. "I got to be Head of Magical Law Enforcement, which was awesome, and she got to be pretty high up in the group that manages all of Quidditch in Great Britain. We had jobs we loved, we had awesome children... we accomplished so much together and it was a good life."
I smiled at him. It did sound pretty awesome.
"And then I lost her," he said. We were both quiet for a moment. I had no idea what to say. Sorry? That didn't seem to cover it. "And then a year and a half ago, found out I was sick. They wouldn't let me work after that. And here I am. Slowly decaying."
"And you hate it..."
"I hate everything," he said. "I've lost my wife, I've lost my career, my children treat me like I'm some sort of porcelain doll who's going to break at any moment, my friends don't want to be around me. Tell me, what good has come out of this, really? None."
"You hate when people baby you," I observed. That was what I realized while we were eating dinner. He practically had a physical reaction when Lily had wondered if he would be up for visitors.
"Yes," He nodded. "And I hated being the fool that the other potions made me. I didn't want to end it like that, out of my mind and just a body."
"Well I can't let you suffer," I told him. "It's a good balance now, right?"
He nodded. "Thank you, Norah," he said. "St. Mungo's doesn't know what they're missing."
That was a huge compliment to me. I was proud that we had come so far and I had been so able to help him. "Thank you." I said.
He just nodded. "I've got an appointment at the hospital in a week's time."
"I'm sure it will be fine," I told him. I didn't believe it, but I wanted to remain positive. I could only wonder what was going through his mind. "It will be fine."
"It will be terrible. I can't wait for it to be over."
"You're not that bad," I told him. "You've got some time left."
"You know, I don't think I do," he told me. "I can feel it spreading. It's getting harder and harder to breathe. I can't run up the stairs like I used to, for a few reasons."
He was probably right. The cancer was probably spreading to the rest of his body. They didn't train me to deal with this sort of thing in training. I didn't know what to say. I knew what would eventually happen, if he was right. He would probably suffocate."It's an awful way to die," was all I could muster up. He wasn't a bad person and he didn't deserve to suffer like he was about to. I wished that there was something I could do to help him.
"Yes, it is," he said. "And that's why I'm not going to let it kill me."
I had absolutely no idea what he meant by that. "What?" I asked.
"Norah, I'm about to ask you to do something terrible. Something I shouldn't have to ask you to do. But I need your help and you're the only one who can help me?"
This struck fear into me. "Y-yes?" my voice waivered. I had a feeling I knew what he was going to ask and I was absolutely not okay with it.
"I need you to help me go out the way I want to. On my own terms, while I still have it in me to be me. I know it is the most awful thing to ask of a person, but I know you're the only one I can ask. So please, help me die the way I want to."
Author's Note: Thanks for all the reviews, guys. It's been awesome! Wanted to let you know I updated my website (if you're new to my stories, as many are, the link is under Homepage on my profile! Go check it out!) Let me know what you think. And now, a quick word from my beta...
Beta Note! Hey guys, in case you are wondering about Emily and the Coastie, here is what is going on with that: Due to the very serious nature (and brevity) of this story, I felt EATC would be out of place at the bottom of it. Therefore, I have decided to postpone further chapters of it until Emily's next story. So fear not! It shall return!