Interlude: Let Them Eat Cake!

Something had been baking in the kitchen all day. Chell had smelled it every time she came up for a break, but it wasn't until after dinner than she found out what it was. Intelligence cleared up quickly, by himself, and set the table again before anyone had a chance to leave. Coffee scurried off to the kitchen with him, and they returned a moment later with dessert: cups of hot coffee for everyone and an enormous black forest cake.

"Ooh, this looks delicious," Chell said, laughing a little. Intelligence served her a slice of cake, and Coffee set down a steaming mug in front of her. "Thanks," she said, and tasted the coffee; it was dark, but sweet and rich with cream. Perfect for drinking with black forest cake.

"Excellent," said Wheatley beside her as he got his slice of cake. "Ah, wait," he added to Coffee. "I don't really like-"

"It's tea," she said, setting it down. "Morning tea with cream and sugar. Is that okay?"

"Ah, lovely," he said, and took a sip of it. "Mmm."

Everyone started on their cake and coffee, talking and laughing as they ate. Every few minutes, someone else poked in their head and took a slice of the huge cake before scurrying away again: a few turrets, a Companion Cube, and even a defective turret, at which GLaDOS glared but didn't stop.

"You know, he's been wanting to make this cake for years," the AI commented casually. "He knows the recipe by heart."

Intelligence took a bite of cake, looking thoughtful. "Three-slash-four cup vegetable oil," he said.

Wheatley grabbed another slice of cake. "This is really, really good," he told Intelligence, excited. Intelligence smiled slightly.

Chell took a second slice of cake a few minutes later, just as Wheatley was getting yet another slice. "How many piece of cake have you had?" she asked, laughing.

"Um," he said, frowning. "Four? This one's four, yeah."

GLaDOS gave him a look. "I think that's enough cake. You're going to make yourself sick, moron."

"I'm not a moron," he said, and shoved half a slice of cake into his mouth.

"Suit yourself," GLaDOS said, rolling her eyes and taking a sip of her coffee.

A face peeked around the door, and a turret came in nervously. She was a little smaller than most turrets, and though she wasn't the only female turret—Chell had met several in tests—she had a more feminine haircut than most. Chell thought she must be the self-proclaimed "different" turret.

"Come on in and have some cake!" she called. The small turret crept towards the table shyly, eyes focused on GLaDOS, who was talking to Intelligence about some idea for a new device. Chell leaned over and cut a slice of cake for the turret, which she put on her own plate. "Here," she said, handing it over. "Go ahead and take it."

"Thank you!" piped the turret, and suddenly GLaDOS turned. "What are you doing here?" she demanded. "Get out, or I'll send you to Redemption!"

The poor different turret scrambled. Chell watched her go until the door closed behind her, wondering where she hid during the day, out of sight somewhere below them.

Next to her, Wheatley was about to take a bit of cake when he stopped and, slowly, set his fork down and put his other hand over his mouth.

"I don't...feel so good," he mumbled, and swallowed.

"I have no sympathy for you," GLaDOS said. "In fact, I have so little sympathy that it's not even apathy anymore." She turned away, sipping her coffee. "I did warn you, after all."

Wheatley moaned, clutching his stomach. He looked very pale. "I'll—ah-be back in a minute," he managed as he got to his feet and fairly sprinted out of the dining room.

"Moron," said GLaDOS smugly, and finished her own slice of cake.

Poor Wheatley, haha. Not that he didn't deserve it...xD I think everyone at Aperture Science is either too stubborn for their own good, or not stubborn ENOUGH.