Fuck Sylus. He is the most irritating, unpredictable, arrogant, creepy bastard of an Espada I have ever met. And that's saying a lot coming from another arrogant bastard. But at least I admit it.

Shit, I even embrace it.

But him?

He fucking celebrates it.

Sometimes when I'm alone in my quarters doing my "duties" I can hear those faggots Szayel, Ichimaru and Sylus all laughing together. I hate the sound of laughter. Well, genuine, happy laughter. Evil laughter, or manic laughter, or even insane laughter is awesome, but not happy laughter. Ever since Sylus humiliated me in front of Aizen and Tousen a couple days back, Gin has been fawning over him like he's his own fucking son. He's absolutely smitten. And with Szayel in the mix it just gets weirder. I thought Szayel created Sylus or something? Is this incest?

I think the old bastard got it easy. He's run off with that ginger bimbo to the human world to live happily ever after or some shit like that. I would never have thought that stone hearted Ulquiborra would be the first Espada to "fall in love" and disobey Aizen. It must have been the girl's boobs. Hell, if she were any less irritating I would've beaten Ulquiorra to her.

Fuck. From one damn evil to another. Couldn't Szayel have made a nicer Fourth Espada? Perhaps someone easily intimidated by me? Or maybe someone who thought I was the shit? Couldn't he even make someone who was female? Am I asking too much?

Tch.

Probably.

Note to self: Kill off Baraggan and get Szayel to make a hot female Espada.

Angrily I punched another hole in my special wall designated specifically for acts of frustration. I'm not one to be organized, but I realized just punching any old wall was starting to make my quarters look like it was inhabited by a wild animal. Last time I checked, bastards are not wild animals. Besides, women might start to think I'm a bit too aggressive and run out on me. I think it must be more impressive to them to have a crater wall because they always go,

"Ooooh, Grimmjow, you're sooo strong,"

And blink their stupid little eyelashes at me. Let's be honest – I can't stand 99% of the women I sleep with. But hey, an Espada's gotta do what an Espada's gotta do.

Still feeling a bit pent-up, I punched another hole in my wall, felt marginally better and decided it was time to get back to my duties.

Hmph. Duties. More like training shit hard since our humiliating loss at the fake Karakura Town. I don't really need to train of course, the fact that I wasn't at the battle is the whole reason we lost. I would've crushed all those Shittygamies with one cero. But the fact is, all the other Espada are being good little nuns and are no doubt getting stronger, and I sure as hell don't wanna lose my rank as Sexta Espada. I mean this rank has my name written all over it – especially the "sex" part.

Remember that bastard Nnoitra? Yeah, like anyone could forget a face like that. He slyly sidled up to me today and whispered some shit in my ear about me being a PMSing kitty.

I'm not even sure what that means. I thought "PMS" was code for "Stay The Fuck Away From Harribel Once A Month." But it still pissed me off, and I gave him one to the head, which he returned twice as hard. . .to my face.

Come on. All I ask for is respect around this place. Do I get it? No way. Did I ever get it? No fucking way. And Sylus has only aggravated this.

Ulquiorra also used to say this one phrase to me which I never fully understood:

"Grimmjow, you are the bane of my existence,"

But I totally understand it now.

Sylus, you are the bane of my fucking existence.

A/N: I know a lot of people don't like UlquiHime – I didn't either, I was more a UryuuXOrihime supporter, but hey they grew on me – but I had to get rid of Ulquiborra some way or another, right? XD

[Ulquiborra isn't a typo by the way. Cuz you know, he's boring, therefore he's a bore therefore Ulquiborra? XD]