YAY 5 REVIEWS!

Everybody! Party time! Now who'll bring the donuts? (I don't particularly like cake…so donuts instead!)

YAY!

So, in celebration, I'm updating fast…ish…

And thanks to my reviewers!

MissusTodd- I'm sorry I'm killing you!…but maybe that's what I want…. XD

xX-LadypersoN-Xx- Again, your reviews just always make me so happy!

MelodyHightoppTodd-…well ok then! Thanks for finally reviewing and I'm glad you're both enjoying the story! XD… Ah! My Phantom of the Opera friend just informed me who Erik is! Hm….I understand now…*content smile* and thank you also for Author Alerting and Favoriteing, AND Story Alerting and Favoriteing=)

Sweenylovett101-Oh dear…so Sweeney Todd helps you think better? Well that's…good…I guess…strange child…

Lovely- Well, you see, to answer you question…op! SPOILERS! Read to find out=) And thanks for being an awesome reviewer!

Oh MY! That was long!

Well, to make up for it, I think the chappy's pretty long too!

What? You read the whole Author's note? WELL GET ON WITH THE STORY!

Chapter 6

April 11th

The area has a certain haunting feeling to it now. The shop. The parlor. The bedroom. The stairs down to the bake house…

I'm not entirely sure what to write here anymore to fill up these pages.

I want to tell you…

Are you too young? How am I to know when (if ever) I'll actually let you read these letters?

I guess you should know.

I guess if I'm ever going to trust anyone, it should be you. But listen love, you have to understand, I did it for you! I did it for us. I wouldn't of done it, if I didn't think life would be better without him…

Don't tell nobody, please. It wasn't me. I didn't plunge a knife into his chest or sneak arsenic into his gin. No…no…he simply…fell…that's all.

I don't even remember… I can't even recall it. It's like I was outside my body, watching myself do it from above.

I suppose it started when he saw my sitting in the booth in the pie shop yesterday. I suppose it started when we began arguing. That's all we ever do nowadays. Now, I truly do miss the days when he didn't come home at all. I liked it better when we didn't talk at all as opposed to now…or then rather…when we did talk.

Anyway, he wobbled into the shop and he said something like, "Nellie? Why are you sitting? I told you! You can't do this! Get back to work! How many pies have you made today?"

Through his yelling all I did was turn my head to look out the window, roll my eyes, and put my hand on you, hoping that you couldn't hear his loud and obnoxious voice.

When he shut his mouth and I could get a word in, I just muttered back, "As many as I always have, Albert. Nobody ever comes to this bloody place anymore anyway…"

He muttered something under his breath that I couldn't hear.

"If you're saying something about my corset again, bugger, I'm telling you right now that I can't lace it any tighter. And people have already noticed, obviously. I've only got two months to go, you know. And I'm starting to think I should perhaps go see a midwife…"

"No Nellie, No…we can't afford it. You know that! I told you to get rid of this child a long time ago and you didn't listen to me! Look where that's gotten us now!" he shouted louder and louder, and now I knew you could hear him. He stepped closer to me so that it felt like he was the bigger person (well, he was. Towering over me like that, weighing at least 100 more pounds then you and I combined. Ha…). Anyway…

I felt the heat rising from the pit of my stomach to my face.

"You know that my pregnancy is not the reason for the lack of customers. So stop blaming me and the child!" I shot back, standing up next to him and practically spitting in his face.

He raised his hand suddenly, as if he was going to slap me square on the cheek. I flinched back a bit, but kept myself from moving out of his range.

I growled, "You wouldn't hurt us, you lug…you can't. You can't even raise your hand. And that's what you get for gorging yourself into bloatation every minute of your life…". His hand fell…he didn't even have the energy to do it. I resisted the bitter urge to laugh.

You must have been able to feel the tension that hung in the air between us, because you began to squirm. I apologize love…no child should have to hear their parents argue like that.

"You're upsetting her…" I muttered through clenched teeth, still staring into his eyes, hoping my gaze burned through him.

All your father did was smirk at me as I turned red with rage. He turned and began to hobble back into the parlor where he would sit all day while my tiered self ran like a mad woman all over the house tending to him and the shop and the few customers that ever come…just praying for the day to end.

But right when he was about halfway across the shop, he stopped and muttered, "I'm very serious Eleanor…get rid of this child now…or I will get rid of it myself."

I felt my heart stop…I swear for a moment, it was like I was run over by a horse and I couldn't speak or move or breath. I was paralyzed.

This wasn't the first time he had made this threat, love. I just hadn't been mentioning it. I'm so scared every night when I go to sleep. I fell like I'm lying next to a potential murderer. And he might not be able to raise a hand to me…but he would find a way…god he would…god…he will.

That's it…it's over.

And then, something overtook my mind. It grabbed the roots of my thoughts and pulled me forward, until I suddenly found my feet clunking in front of each other heavily, marching across the pie shop. I met with Albert right when he was pulling back the curtains that covered the threshold to the hallway. Right when he was standing at the top of the long, steep, hard, cement stairs leading to the bake house. My hands met with him and pushed him…pushed him aside…

…pushed him to his death…

And as I came back into myself, I realized that I was shaking violently. The deep thudding noises rang in my ears over and over again…and suddenly glancing down the flight, all I could do was scream and scream at the top of my lungs. I felt dizzy as hot tears began to boil in my eyes. The hallway began to spin and I couldn't breath with the way it was tossing me about. The last thing I remember before I drowned in darkness was a voice calling out, "Mrs. Lovett? Mrs. Lovett?"

Next thing I knew, I was in bed. I hadn't opened my eyes yet, but I could feel the softness below my back and a pillow behind my head. As I opened my them, the only thing that made it's way through my blurry wet vision was Benjamin Barker's sweet face.

And then I was sure I'd died. Died and gone to heaven. I was even more positive when Benjamin reached down and placed his hand on my cheek. I closed my eyes and savored the moment, loving the touch and how it relaxed me and just made me want to sleep…

But the moment was shattered when he moved his hand to my forehead and asked, "Mrs. Lovett? Stay awake now! Are you alright? Can you speak?" and I realized that I was all too alive and Benjamin wasn't caressing me, he was simply checking my temperature.

I opened my eyes all the way and took in a deep breath, filling up my sore lungs.

"Mr. Barker?" I asked as my memory started to come back.

I was at the top of the stairs… and I must of fainted.

Thank god Benjamin was there to catch us or we'd be at the bottom of the staircase! I remember thinking.

I picked up my arms from my sides and tried to prop myself up, but Benjamin stopped me.

"Oh no no, pet. You stay right there. Are you felling alright? Sick? Dizzy? What about the child? How's the baby?"

I shook my head and placed my hand on my round stomach, thanking God again for having Ben there to save us from a nasty fall.

"I'll be right back…ok? Don't move, I have to go see if Johanna's alright…" and he ran out of the room, leaving us to catch our breath on our own.

All too suddenly, I remembered everything. The fight…Albert… the stairs… and that's what yesterday's scribbles were all about…the sudden and fresh awful memory in my mind…

I didn't finish the note before Benjamin came back in with a sleeping Johanna in his arms and I had to set the pen and paper aside.

"Sorry, Mrs. Lovett. Lucy and I left poor Johanna all alone upstairs sleeping when we heard you scream. Lucy's gone to fetch a doctor for you. And a constable too, I suppose."

"Constable…" I choked out, trying to sit up again and getting all the way this time. Benjamin grabbed my elbow and helped me most of the way.

"So Albert is…"

Benjamin interrupted me, "Do you remember what happened?"

Did I remember? Of course I did! All too vividly in fact. The fire in my eyes, the uncontrollable drive, the weight of him against my hands…

My eyes darted around, wondering if I could somehow change the subject. Finally, all I muttered was, "He fell…"

"Do you remember anything else?"

I stared down at my stomach and ran my hands over you again. I didn't want to lie…but I wanted much less to tell the truth! When I didn't answer, Mr. Barker mistakenly took that as a no, and went on with the conversation. What a relief…

"I'm not sure how long Lucy will be…"

I didn't exactly have a chance to reply to that because all too suddenly, you surprised me! Your sudden stirring made me jump as you tumbled and moved around so viciously. I gasped as I felt the abrupt movement, and Benjamin was suddenly so scared also!

"Are you alright? Is the child alright? Is something wrong?"

I smiled at his care and muttered, "No no, it's fine. She's just movin a bunch. Startled me…that's all." I couldn't help but smile more at your movements. To know that you're alive and healthy inside of me, it washes away everything outside and makes my world just so happy.

"Maybe I should fetch your midwife?" he asked, standing up brusquely.

"No!" I quickly shot at him, shaking my head. I let silence fall on us again as he kneeled back down next to the bed and didn't ask any questions.

"I'm truly sorry for all of this Mrs. Lovett…how awful it must be…"

At that moment, all I found I had the energy to do was throw myself in Benjamin's arms and sob. I buried my face into his neck and cried and cried. And all he did the whole time was hold me…and I've never felt so loved in all my life, I swear it.

I didn't tell him…and I'll never tell anyone but you. But I wasn't crying because Albert was dead, and it was all so horrible and dramatic. I was crying because it was finally all over. I wouldn't have to deal with him anymore…everything was going to be alright…

Last night, I masked my happiness and relief with sorrow as I soaked my love in my tears.

Yay!

Oh yes! And I have a question for my readers!

Would you rather have: More chapters but shorter chapters? Or… Less chapters but longer chapters?

Answer with your review!

Many more and a fast update will result!

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