O.o
What an overwhelming amount of reviews! This'll be a long thank you list…I'll try and keep it short… yeah…fail
Thanks to
Sheila Chiaroscura and Lady Halloween for favoriting!
And thanks to…
Samantha Eleanor Lestrange- Holy cheezit that's…good, I guess! =) (and btw, I like that…holy cheezit…teehee…)
Inuyasha6457- lol. This is my solemn promise to all of my readers that I will never kill Mrs. Lovett off in any of my…no…in this fic. - I hate the ending of the movie the way it is!
XDazedandConfusedX - *hangs head in shame* sowwy… So…if it's a good thing then…I'm glad I made you cry! But that sounds so awful! XD Thanks for the other random review, may sound stalkerish, but I love your stalkerishness…lol
Sheila Chiaroscura- Once again, YAY QUOTES! And yes…there's a quote from Helena Bonham Carter saying how she based Mrs. Lovett off of a mother who had lost her child. I quiet like the idea…unfortunately that leads me to writing chapters like the last one!
Violet-revenge- I know…it's ever so tragic, eh?
Lady Halloween- Thanks and I'm glad to hear your friend made it. I was a preme too…don't know if they ever thought I was gonna die though…lol
Lovely- *comes into your chambers and hugs you…then starts to cry with you too* Thanks for not killing me! I like life!
xX-LadypersoN-Xx- Sorry reader! And lets face it…her murderous act wasn't for nothing…Albert was a jerk anyway…XD
MissusTodd- Intense, complex, and relatable…well thanks! Makes me feel special =)
Sweenylovett101 - Thanks for reviewing here even though you gave me your very upset individual review in person….
Wowy! TEN! YOU GUYS ARE FREAKING AMAZING!
But, lets get on with it…shall we? =)
Chapter 10
June 10th
3:01 AM
The days are long, hot, and hollow.
They drag on and on with no purpose.
It's been a month now since I had you…and lost you…and I'm not exactly sure why I'm even writing.
You're not here...you never will be. I can write, and pray, and wait. But it won't bring you back to the embrace we never shared.
Benjamin visits less and less often, it seems. I can't blame him. Every time he does, all I can do is hug my knees to my chest and look blindly out the window and nod and shake my head at his meaningless questions: "How's your day?" "Wonderful weather, isn't it?" "Feeling up to going someplace today?"
How does he expect me to respond? Does he expect me to paste a smile on my face and strike up an elaborate conversation? Does he expect me to whip myself out of my seat and sling my arm around his for a stroll? I wish I could…but it simply doesn't work like that anymore.
I don't ever even utter a word. I haven't talked to anyone for so long…besides to you…and you're not even here to hear me.
So Benjamin simply…hasn't enjoyed my presence. I suppose I can't blame him. I don't particularly enjoy having myself around either, for that matter.
Besides, Mr. Barker has his own family to attend to. Johanna's almost a year now I suppose…and Ben tells me that he thinks Lucy might be pregnant again…
I hope not.
I pray not.
It simply wouldn't be fair for her to have two healthy children and the most brilliant man I know…and I have nothing.
It'd kill me.
It already does.
A week after, my midwife came back to ensure I was doing alright, I suppose. Well after she shoved food down my throat, cause I hadn't been eating. I just didn't have the appetite, I still don't…really.
But anyway, afterwards, she began to talk about your burial again…
I yelled at her. I mean, did she actually have to bring that up to me?
"Wot's the point?" I screamed "Nobody ever bloody loved her but me!"
…
So I don't know. Cause she got angry with me and left…so I'm sorry love. I don't even know what's happened to you. I don't want to know…it's all too painful to imagine you so small…so pale…and so cold.
I can't stand this… I can't take it anymore! I can't stand talking and writing to you as if you're still here…or…or as if you're going to magically show up one of these days! As if I can still potentially have you.
I can't stand seeing this bloody journal sitting on my bloody shelf every time I walk by! With those big, cursive letters on the front:
Love Letters to my Unborn Child
I feel the bloody compulsion every night to pick it up and read through the other nine entries.
And it hurts - to read about my excitement, my happiness, my worry, my sacrifices.
And for what? For a journal full of this shit…and stuff I don't want any memory of…engraved forever in these pages…engraved forever in my mind…
Is this what you want? For me to torture myself by reading this? Is it you who compels me to pick up this bloody journal every night?
Ella! I love you so much that everyday I cry and I cry until my face burns and I can't hardly breath! I know I've said it a million times but I love you and I can't stand that you're dead! Just gone! Just like that!
And I can't take it how everyone tries to hide it behind their eyes…but they can't. They say it's my fault…it's always the mothers fault.
And whether I wore that bloody corset for too long or I didn't eat healthy or I didn't do whatever the hell I was suppose to do, it's too late now and it's all my fault and I can't stand that, Ella! I can't take it!
I hardly see what to live for anymore…
Oh! Hang in there my loves.
For those of you who have been sticking with Mrs. Lovett, even when she's not much of a joy to have around, let me promise you, that things can and will get better for her!
There's only one chapter left…how yah gonna do that?
Well that certainly isn't enough time to rekindle a dead spirit, is it now?
So I guess I'll have to announce here that Love Letters to My Unborn Child is actually the first of a (as of right now) three part series! (but if I let my mind keep wondering like it often does…it might actually end up being even LONGER)
YAY!
So far, I've got eleven chapters written out, (two in the second part, and the rest in the third) and I am planning on thirteen!
Keep up the reviewing and I will keep up the posting!
Love you guys!