A/N- A-a hundred reviews... A hundred reviews... A HUNDRED REVIEWS? O-oh my god... Oh my god... I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH! -cries of happiness-
Anyway, this chapter is the longest one yet by far. Its long enough to be two chapters, but I couldn't think were to end it so I just kept writing ^^;
*Ahem* -gets out piece of paper- Today's program is as follows: Angst, angsty drama, more angst, a brief fujoshi interval, then a brief quarrel followed by angsting that finally becomes sort of happy. Please enjoy the chapter.
-goes to squee over reviews-
Chapter 15- Alone
The journey back to England was a very subdued affair, with only the small sobs and sniffles Canada was emitting breaking the uncomfortable silence. Once or twice America tried to strike up a conversation with his brother but Canada simply turned his back on him, not wishing to talk, so the trip continued in silence.
Everyone was relieved when they finally arrived in London and the car was parked outside England's Tudor style house.
England and America went up to the door straight away but Canada remained in the car, simply staring into a space. He had stopped crying around ten minutes ago, having run out of tears to shed, but his eyes were still sore and puffy.
Awful thoughts were swimming around his head and the Canadian hadn't the strength to keep them away any more. Russia had left. And now... he was alone... again. He curled his knees into his chest and put his head in his hands. It wasn't as if it were any different from before, he would just go back to how he was living a few months ago, no big deal... But then... why did it hurt so much? It felt like... it felt like there was a knife piercing his heart. The ache wouldn't go away, no matter how hard he tried to forget about it. At first he felt numb, as if he couldn't believe it was happening but now the whole reality of the situation was sinking in. Russia had left. There was nothing else to it, but it felt like his world had caved in around his head.
"I love him..." Canada whispered to himself quietly.
'But he didn't love you back.' a voice at the back of his mind hissed.
"No... He loved me... O-of course he did... this is just a big mistake... a mistake..." Canada whimpered, beginning to tear up again.
'No! He never loved you. Truly loved you. Once things got rough, he just upped and left, he didn't care. No one does, no-one will ever love you!'
"S-shut up!"
'It's true... you can't deny it. Barely anyone remembers your name, what makes you think you can be loved?'
"Be quiet!" Canada gasped, trying not to cry but he knew deep down, that the words were true. Suddenly a knock at the car window brought him back to his senses.
"Um... Are you okay, lad?" Canada looked up from his seat in the car to see England, standing by the car and looking down at his son. "You were kind of talking to yourself..."
Canada nodded glumly. "Yes... I'm fine..."
England nodded briefly, understanding that his son didn't want to talk. "How about you come inside... I'll make you a cup of tea?"
Once again, Canada nodded, this time standing up and clambering out of the car, to follow his father inside.
xXx
England peered over his mug of tea at his son. Canada hadn't touched his tea for five minutes and instead had been staring into a space, not moving or speaking. It was time to do something about this so he placed his tea down and cleared his throat, jolting Canada out of whatever thoughts he was having.
"Eh?" He asked, looking around bewildered.
England folded his hands in front of his face and looked at his son seriously. "Listen um... Canada!" He began, forgetting the boy's name for a second. "Is... is everything alright?"
Instantly Canada's face fell and he looked away from his father, his face in shadow. "Y-yeah... I'm fine..." He muttered his lavender eyes not meeting England's green ones.
England sighed. He and Canada had never been that close and, though it pained him to admit it, he had neglected the boy in favour of his siblings when he was just a colony. Nowadays they barely spoke but he did care about the boy and he hated to see him so upset.
He sighed. "Canada, you're obviously not fine... but you know that you can talk to me about it, don't you?"
Canada nodded hesitantly. "Yeah... I know..."
There was an awkward pause in which no-one spoke and England stared at the Canadian over his clasped hands.
"So... do you want to talk about it?" England finally said, thinking that the other didn't get the hint.
Canada quickly shook his head. "N-no! I'm f-fine..." he said hurriedly, refusing to look the blonde in the eye.
England sighed again. He really wanted the boy to open up to him but it was hard when he was just being so stubborn. "Look lad... I understand that your upset about what happened today, but you can't let this drag you down-" He began but Canada cut him off.
"England... c-can you stop talking... I really don't want a pep talk..."
England frowned "I was only trying to help."
"I know that... but I'm really not in the mood to talk." Canada said, burying his face in his hands.
With a sigh, England leaned across the table and placed a hand on the Canadian's shoulder. "I-I'm sorry about happened today, really, I am, but you're much better off without him and that we're right. He was a bad influence on you, he made you hit Alfred and he was hurting you, I saw it., and well, he can't have been worth it if he left you like that..."
Without warning, Canada suddenly stood up, knocking the chair back as he did so. "YOU'RE NOT SORRY! YOU'RE GLOATING THAT YOU GOT YOUR WAY!" he yelled, glaring down at the Englishman. "IT'S YOU'RE FAULT HE LEFT! I WAS HAPPY WITH HIM! A-AND IF YOU HADN'T BEEN SO... SO DIFFICULT, HE WOULDN'T HAVE LEFT!"
It was then that England decided he'd heard enough. "BUT HE STILL LEFT DIDN'T HE? HE OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T CARE ENOUGH TO STAY!" He yelled, standing up and staring down his son. The words pierced Canada like a knife, and his eyes filled with tears. Quickly, England clasped a hand over his mouth, realizing what he said but unable to take it back. It was too late. Canada covered his eyes with his hand and let the tears flow, letting out choked sobs as he did so. "L-look lad... I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean it-"
"Y-you're wrong." A choked voice interrupted him.
"Pardon?" England asked, lowering his hand.
"YOU'RE WRONG! YOU'RE WRONG! YOU'RE WRONG!" Canada screamed, turning and fleeing from the room.
"Canada, wait!" the Englishman called, but it was no use. Thumps echoed through the house as Canada ran up the stairs.
England sighed and sat down in his chair with a thump, placing his head in his hands. He hadn't wanted that to happen, he only wanted to help the boy, yet somehow this has happened and now they were on worse terms than ever.
Canada ran up the stairs, his heart pounding in his chest, almost crashing into his brother who had come to see what all the shouting was about. With tears in his eyes, he flung open the door to his old room and collapsed onto the bed, sobbing into his pillow.
"He's right..." he whispered through his tears. "He's right, he's right he's right..."
xXx
Russia walked down the path to his house slowly, looking down at the ground.
After discovering that Canada had gone, Russia quickly left the house, leaving his sister to look after the confused polar bear. There was no point staying long. It was too late to get Canada back now. He had missed his chance... but it was probably for the better. At least this way the boy wouldn't get hurt... There was no point trying to get him back. There would just be more people getting in the way and trying to break them up. It was much safer this way, they would forget about each other and things would go back to how they used to be. Alone in the cold...
Frustrated, Russia kicked a stone at the edge of the path. He didn't want to leave Canada, not at all. The boy had made him feel happier than he had in a long time... But now...
Why? Why was it that every time he found something in his love to find joy in, something took it away from him. Maybe it was just how he was meant to be... Alone. Russia cringed at the thought and picked up his pace. He swung the door open with a bang and quickly strode towards his kitchen.
It was then that he did something he hadn't done since he had started dating Canada. He reached up to one of the overhead cupboards and, after a moments hesitation, took down a bottle of strong Vodka. Without a second thought, he twisted off the top and downed half the bottle in one swing shivering slightly at the pleasant burn it brought to his throat.
xXx
America trudged down the stairs, a tray in his hands. On the tray lay a plate of untouched pancakes, a glass of milk and a... thing in a porcelain bowl. According to England it was a bowl of soup but the soup itself had blackened in the pan and as it had cooled down, had hardened and curled in on itself into something that now resembled a shrunken head. Nevertheless, it was as untouched as everything else on the tray and it was with a heavy heart that America carried it down the stairs.
He entered the kitchen and slammed the tray down on the table with a bang, causing England who had been reading a newspaper, to jump.
"Something wrong?" he asked, folding his paper and placing it to one side.
"He's not eating..." said America with a sigh, pulling out a chair and slumping down in it. "He won't even eat the pancakes we bought for him... Arthur, its been three days, he's gonna starve if he keeps this up. You'd think he'd be over that damn Commie by now!"
England sighed and got up from his seat to stand behind America and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Just give your brother time, I'm sure he'll come round eventually."
"But he's barely moved in three days, we've gotta make him come round faster!"
England shook his head. "Just be patient love. He'll see sense if you just let him be."
America folded his arms and grumbled his disbelief but let the matter rest.
xXx
Hungary paced the floor of her house angrily. She took a break from stalk- gathering information on her her latest couple for two days because she had a meeting with her boss and suddenly they've disappeared off the face of the earth. Brilliant.
She hadn't heard a thing from either man since she came back from her meeting three days ago and it was really annoying her. When she went to stake out Canada's house she found it empty and Russia's house showed no signs of life whatsoever, with the curtains drawn and the lights off. She also ran into Belarus on the way back home and had asked if she knew where Russia was, but the creepy Blonde had only muttered a dark negative. It also didn't help that neither nation was answering their phone.
Hungary was stumped. Normally it was easy for her to find countries when she needed them because they tended to be so eccentric and loud that they caused an uproar wherever they went, but both Russia and Canada could be inconspicuous when they wanted to and tended to keep to themselves.
It was frustrating to say the least. This new couple had so much potential and she was missing it! With a sigh, Hungary sunk down into a chair and raised a hand to her forehead. All this stressing was going to give her wrinkles...
Just then, the phone rang, forcing Hungary to forfeit her comfy seat and make her way over to the receiver. "Hello?" she said, raising it to her ear.
"Hungary? Oh thank god..." said the emotional voice of Ukraine.
"Ukraine? What's the matter, why're you calling?"
"Well... this is going to sound a little weird but... do you know what bears eat?" Hungary stared at the receiver blankly.
"Bears? They eat anything if its available don't they? Why do you ask?"
Ukraine paused. "Well... I've started looking after this bear, its a long story, but... its not eating anything and I'm starting to get worried..."
"Maybe its going into hibernation?" Hungary suggested uncertainly. "It is nearly December after all..."
On the other end of the line Ukraine bit her lip. "No... I don't think its that..."
Hungary rolled her eyes. "Well, I've got some free time, how about I drive over to your house and you tell me the 'long story' behind this bear."
"Okay then, see you soon..." Ukraine smiled.
"Sure thing Hun!" Hungary replied before hanging up the phone. Female nations tended to be on much better terms with each other than the male ones because they had to forget the mistakes of the past and realized that, since it was rare to find female nations, the girls had to stick together and so tended to go to each other for advice, with the exception of Belarus who everyone found creepy.
Quickly, Hungary packed a few things into a bag and was on her way over to Ukraine's house, driving through beautiful Ukrainian countryside and it wasn't long before she pulled over beside the Ukrainians house.
Ukraine wasn't an incredibly rich country but she did well enough and got most of her money through farming, that she was very proud of. Unlike most countries, who lived in high class houses within cities, she lived on a farm in the country and worked just as hard as some of her own people in the fields, sometimes harder, to get the taxes paid.
Hungary stepped out of the car and stretched. They may share a border but it still took a while to drive to each other's houses and she had gotten a little cramped while sitting in the small car.
Stretching finished, Hungary quickly grabbed her bag from the car and strode towards the house, but before she could ring the doorbell, the door was opened by a very tired looking Ukraine. There were bags under her eyes and her hair was messy, as if she had been tossing and turning in bed and hadn't bothered to brush it the next day.
Hungary was taken aback. Ukraine always looked so perfect and carefree, not a hair out of place. It was shocking to see her like this.
Instantly, the Hungary's motherly instinct kicked in and she rushed over to the Ukrainian and began fussing over her. "Oh god hun, are you okay? You look so tired, have you been sleeping well?"
Ukraine blinked slowly, taking time to process the Hungarian's words before smiling reassuringly. "No, no, I'm fine... well, to be honest I'm a little worried..."
Hungary's ears pricked up. "Worried? About what?"
Ukraine sighed quietly then gave the other girl a small smile. "I-If you can keep a secret, then I'll tell you... but come on in first, I'll make some tea..."
Hungary nodded at the blonde's suggestion and smiled. She made to follow her inside but suddenly a flash of white at the edge of her vision made her pause. She pushed past Ukraine and stood in the doorframe, staring down at the white ball of fluff that was Kumajiro. "Th-that bear..." she said quietly, bending down to pick it up.
Ukraine nodded, "Yeah, that's him... I'm kind of worried about him... he's not eating anything-"
"-But he's Canada's isn't he?" Hungary cut across, making Ukraine stare at her in shock.
"H-how did you know that?"
Hungary blushed. "Th-that's not important right now, what's important is- Do you know where he is?" Ukraine nodded and then looked away. "Tell me everything you know." Hungary said, while getting out a notebook.
"Oh um... okay..." said Ukraine, feeling a little uncomfortable under Hungary's intense stare. She then went on to tell the other girl everything she knew about what happened, but had to pause for a second to let Hungary let out shouts of envy when she found out about the kiss.
"Argh! Why? Why couldn't I have been there? Why?" she shrieked, grabbing hold of Ukraine's shoulder's and shaking.
Ukraine smiled nervously, unsure of how to deal with the rabid fangirl before her, but before she got the chance to say anything, Hungary suddenly paused. "But wait... how did you start looking after the bear? And what about Canada's family?"
Ukraine's smile dropped and she looked away. "They... they didn't take it well... there was an argument and... well Russia thought it would be better if Canada went with his family- safer... but... he changed his mind, only by the time he got back... Canada was gone... Kumajiro was left behind and well, Russia had stormed off, so I took him back to my place..."
Hungary stared open mouthed at Ukraine in shock, not able to believe things had gone so wrong over just a few days. Suddenly, with one fluid motion, the Hungarian reached into her pocket and brought out a cellphone. She flipped the lid up and quickly scrolled through the contacts. Finding the person she wanted, she pressed the green button and brought the phone to her ear.
"France..." she began, "We have a problem."
xXx
England sipped his cup of tea slowly as he stared out the window. It was a beautiful day outside, a first for British weather but it did nothing to brighten the gloomy mood inside the house.
Canada still refused to come out of his room, despite England and America's best efforts and America was still impatient for Canada to forget about the Russian and for things to get back to normal. With a sigh England placed his head on his hand and turned his attention back to the window, just as a flashy red car pulled up in front of the house. 'The hell..?' Thought England, raising his head up off his hand.
A man began to get out of the front seat and England stood up in horror, recognising the blonde Frenchman, standing up and tossing his hair out of his eyes.
"Oh bloody hell..." England murmured, walking over to the door. He swung the door open and leaned against the doorframe, glaring at the man before him. "What the hell do you want?" He asked, scowling.
For once France didn't pout or make a stupid or flirtatious remark. Instead he scowled at England and crossed his arms. "Angleterre, get out of ze way." He said seriously, causing England to do a double take.
"Wh-what?"
"You heard me." France said seriously, trying to force his way past the Englishman in the doorway, but England stopped him.
"What the bloody hell are you doing here." England growled, glaring at the blonde man, who frowned back at him.
France stepped back and pouted. "Angleterre, how could you?" he said, folding his arms.
"Um, what?" England asked, cocking his head to one side.
"You broke zem up! Mon fils and Russia! How could you? Zey were perfect!"
England sighed. "I guess you'd better come inside." He turned to walk into the dark house, followed by the Frenchman. He pulled out a chair in the dining room and sat down, gesturing for France to do the same. "First off, how did you know they were dating?"
France smiled. "Oh I saw zem holding hands after ze last meeting! It was très adorable!"
England frowned. "Well why the hell didn't you tell me?" he shouted, and France shrugged calmly.
"I waz afraid you would react like you clearly did when you first found out, and its not like you need to know about your son's private life."
"I have a right to know if he's being hurt!"
"He wasn't being hurt, it was l'amour~"
"It was not bloody 'l'amour'. It was my son being stupid and getting ahead of himself."
France shook his head, disappointedly. "Mon cher, think what you're saying! You are acting like he iz stupid, he knows what he's doing."
"Oh, come off it, you only saw them together once, and from what I saw, Canada had no idea what he was getting into!" England argued, folding his arms.
"He knew exactly what he waz getting into, don't underestimate him. I say you let him go back to Russia!" France replied, standing up and banging his fist on the table.
England stood up and glared down at the Frenchman. "I don't know who told you they broke up, but did they also tell you this? It was Russia who broke up with Canada, of his own free will. He can't have cared that much if he was willing to give him up that easily."
France looked down at the ground solemnly. "Russia made a mistake... I... I will fix it, no?"
xXx
The room was dark. Curtains were drawn, blocking the bright light from outside from view and amplifying the gloomy feel that hung in the air. Canada lay face down on the bed, his blonde hair grubby and unwashed spread out on the pillow and his eyes were red and sore from constant crying and lack of sleep. In three days he had barely moved, only getting up to go to the toilet or to tell his family to leave him be, wanting to be left alone with his thoughts. He hadn't eaten and because of this his cheeks were hollow and he was beginning to look thin and unwell. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all. For once he had found a reason to be happy, someone that made him feel noticed and they had left him when things got rough. It just wasn't fair.
Behind him he heard the door creak open and he turned his back on the door, making it plain to whoever was intruding that he didn't want to talk.
"Mon Cher, what are you doing to yourself?" A voice said and Canada blinked in surprise.
Sitting up slowly, he turned to the man. "Papa?"
Canada heard the bed groan as the man sat down on it and he turned to face him with sad eyes. "I...I heard what happened between you and Russia..." France said slowly, looking down at his hands.
Instantly Canada tensed. "I-I suppose your going to t-tell me that it was for the b-best as well."
"Non I-"
"W-well... m-maybe you're right..." He said slowly, and France stared at him in shock. "E-everything went wrong a-and he l-left me... H-he never loved me... m-maybe its better this way..." he finished with a sob.
France pouted dramatically. "Non, non! You cannot think like zat! Russia just made a mistake, that's all. You'll see, he iz probably just as upset at you are."
Canada sniffed. "I wish... Alfred was r-right... he o-only dated me t-to annoy him and E-England..." France opened his mouth to speak but Canada continued. "A-and I was s-so happy with h-him! I j-just wanted s-someone t-to care about m-me for once b-but... but... he d-didn't care... I j-just wish... I just..." Tears were streaming down his face now and it was becoming harder for him to speak. Unable to bear it any longer, France pulled the boy into a hug and let him cry into his jumper, stroking his hair comfortingly.
"Shh, shh, it's okay mon fils, its okay... He does care about you, he went back to try and apologise but you were already gone. He cares and he's probably just as upset as you are."
Canada looked up at him with hope shining in his eyes. "R-really?"
"Oui mon cher. We should go find him, no?"
Canada smiled and gave France a hug, "Oui." He whispered happily.
A/N- BWAAAAAARGH I LOVE YOU ALL! I never EVER expected to get this many reviews and I love you all! Each and every one of you! I probably don't deserve them but still! THANKYOU! -hugs everyone-
…
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Canada: You should probably stop hugging them now...
Oh um... right! -lets go- Thankyou all so much for your reviews! -bows- Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even though it was kinda depressing, but it picks up towards the end!
Now for translations:
Angleterre- 'England' in French
Mon Fils- 'My son' in French
Mon cher- 'My dear' in French
Très- 'Very' in French
L'amour- 'Love' in French
Non- 'No' in French
Oui- 'Yes' in French
Horay for random French words! Again, thankyou all, aaaaand~ Until next time peeps~
~Tigress
xxx