LONGEST. CHAPTER. EVER.
FAINT. PANT. WHEEZE.
Before we begin and I pass out, let me explain the live-screening: unedited footage is streamed to the losers so they can see what their friends and families are up to. It's not the real episode actually airing on Cartoon Network/Teletoon, just a little preview for them. You'll see what I mean. And please don't ask questions about the end, if you're confused. It will be explored more in the next chapter. I hope you at least get the gist. If not and it's killing you, send me a PM and I'll explain it better. I just feel I didn't write it as good as I could have, but couldn't think of a better way to word it.
Oh well. Enjoy!
Trent, carrying his guitar case full of money, walked down the sidewalk with Selena, who had her new guitar close by and was looking around at all the sights to see in Toronto. Being too close to his own guitar, Trent gave it to a hobo in an alley by the CN Tower. He figured he could use it to earn some money of his own… Or use it to hold his tin cans. Whatever floated the homeless man's boat. Selena, on the other hand, kept her guitar. It was much nicer than her old one… And they had only seen one hobo, so why not?
The sun was getting lower, and they knew they'd have to go back to the city's entrance and give Chris the money sooner or later. As they searched for somebody on their team, Selena suddenly lost grip of her balloon and it started floating toward the street, which was packed with cars. Selena jumped up to reach it, and Trent luckily caught her in mid-air before she landed in front of a speeding convertible.
"Selena, you have to be more careful," Trent said, sounding very exasperated as he sat her back on her feet. "This has got to be the fifth time I've kept you from wandering into oncoming traffic."
"Sorry," Selena said, barely paying attention as she grinned in victory at her balloon. "But did you see that catch? It was perfect!"
"The landing wouldn't have been quite as great, though," Trent told her, a small smirk on his lips.
Selena giggled a bit, that is, until her balloon popped out of nowhere. She looked down at the rubbery remains dangling on the end of her string. "Wi- Wi- WINSLOW!" She started bawling, mourning the loss of her dear balloon friend and causing a few heads to turn. A thirteen year old girl crying over something as silly as a popped balloon was a bit odd, after all.
As she continued to bawl and scream something about how he was too young, Trent face-palmed.
Trent sighed an exhausted sigh as he tucked his hands in his pockets. He looked out the glass wall in the Confession Booth, then back at the camera and said, "Selena's cool and all, but after spending the whole day with her, you just start to feel like you're babysitting. The only difference is that I'm not getting paid and she hasn't gotten anything stuck up her nose yet."
He looked out the window once again, then gasped once he saw what Selena was doing a few feet away from the booth. "Selena, no!" he yelled, hitting the glass to get her attention. "Take that out! Nickels are not supposed to go up there!" He groaned, looking back at the camera. "What's up with her? I know she's a little… different, but she's not usually this crazy! It's like after lunch, she just started bouncing off the walls!"
"I had five refills of Mountain Dew back at Mickey D's," Selena said, her eye twitching ever so much. "It was so good and my mom never lets me have that much at home and I don't know why and it was so good and my eye keeps twitching and it was so good and is my heart supposed to be beating this fast?" She stopped rambling, seeing something buzzing in front of her face. "Ooooh, a fly!" She started chasing it around, knocking the camera to the ground and making the screen go to static.
As Trent and Selena, who was still a bit gloomy over her popped balloon, made their way around a street corner, they were greeted by an extremely long line, the people forming it waiting for something eagerly with various items in their hands.
"Is this the line for the public restrooms or something?" Selena tried looking around the line of people, but it was so long, she couldn't see what it led to. "Or maybe a pawn shop?" she suggested, taking notice of the stuff the people were holding.
"I seriously doubt a pawn shop or even a restroom would have a line this long," Trent muttered, dragging Selena away from the back of the line and walking past the people. At the end of the line, a Hispanic teen about Trent's age watched the two as they walked past him and called out, "Excuse me, friends? The line ends here."
They looked back at him and Selena, quickly taking note of how attractive he was, let out a giggle and said, "We know. We were just going to see what it was you're waiting for."
"But now that we're talking about it," Trent started, looking back toward the front of the line, "what are you guys waiting for?"
"One of your friends from Total Drama and a very intimidating blonde girl are letting their goat amigo eat any personal items one wants destroyed for five dollars a chomp," the handsome young man explained. "I know, it is strange indeed, but very amusing."
"What are you giving Chester to eat?" Selena asked, pointing to the suspicious bag Alejandro had in his hands.
"Um…" He hid it behind his back and mumbled, "Something that I need to get rid of…" He quietly added, "So there's no evidence," and it was luckily quiet enough that the other two didn't hear.
"So DJ and Marilee did find something to do with Chester," Trent mumbled, looking back at him. "Uh, I guess you recognized me from TDI, right?"
"Yes, it's an honor to meet you, Trent. I'm Alejandro." He looked over at Selena and grinned. "And who might you be, senorita?"
His intense beauty hit Selena even harder, making her cheeks flush and her caffeine high fade. "Um… I'm… Candace."
"No, you're not," Trent told her, confused by her sudden stupor.
"Oh. Right… I'm Bridgette."
"You're getting colder."
"… Ophelia?"
"Who?" Trent asked, looking more confused that ever. He finally gave up on Selena guessing her own name and said, "Alejandro, this is Selena. Selena, Alejandro."
"Selena," Alejandro softly said, taking her hand. "What a lovely name." He gallantly bent down and kissed her hand, which only made her face redden more and almost made her faint. Luckily, Trent caught her before she hit the ground.
"Uh… Okay?" Trent looked back at Alejandro and said, "Nice meeting you… I guess." He stood Selena back up, who looked extremely dizzy.
Alejandro seemed unfazed by Selena's strange behavior, as if he was used to girls acting like that around him. "The pleasure is all mine."
As Trent guided the dazed girl toward the front of the line, he looked at the camera, chuckled and quietly said, "Heh, if you're watching this, Zack, sorry you had to see that."
Selena looked up at him, confused. "Who's Zack?"
Meanwhile, miles and miles away from Toronto…
A few of the campers voted out of Total Sibling Rivalry were in the lounge in Playa de Losers, watching the live feed of the footage from that episode. Rikki and Jackson exchanged worried glances and then looked at Zack, who was sitting on the couch adjacent to them, his mouth gaping in horror. "Oh, wow, Zack," Rikki murmured, unsure of what to say. "I'm sorry about that. She probably didn't mean it."
Zack still said and did nothing but stare at the screen, even though Selena was off of it by that point and it was showing Cody at the hospital with Sierra sobbing over his many injuries.
Bridgette, sitting in the loveseat on the other side of Rikki and Jackson, stood up and walked over to Zack, waving a hand in front of his face. "Zack? You okay?" He didn't blink.
Jackson sucked in a little bit of air through his teeth, as if he felt his pain. "I think he's in shock. This guy from my Psych course last semester said that his cousin went into that same state after his dad got remarried to a woman the same age as his younger brother." He nodded and mumbled, "Poor guy was stuck like that for weeks. Zack could be stuck for that long too, if he's that upset about it."
Jamal, who was seated next to Zack and had been quiet until then, let out a roaring laugh and elbowed Zack in the arm. "Bro, I think you're girl's gotten over you!"
He continued to laugh, that is until the younger boy stood up and kneed him in a place guys do not want to be kneed. "At least I HAVE a girlfriend!" With that, he stormed off, muttering profanities to himself.
While Jamal fell off the couch and stuffed his arms between his legs in seething pain, Bridgette and Rikki looked concerned at Zack as he stalked off. Jackson just sighed, "Or just a few minutes…"
Back in Toronto…
When Trent and Selena finally got to the front of the line, but not before getting a few more pictures with fan girls and a few more bucks for charity, they saw their little sisters collecting the items from the people at the front of the line and hand it to DJ. While DJ fed said item to Chester the goat, Marilee happily took the money from the customers as they watched the goat gobble their hated possessions away from existence.
"Um…" The two stopped as they approached Grace and Zoey, but the latter was too busy carrying a pile of a girl's embarrassing school pictures over to DJ to talk. Trent looked down at his sister and said, "Is this what you guys have been doing all day?"
"Nope, we just started this goatie feedin' thingy," Grace said.
"Oh… What did you do before this, then?"
"As much as I'd like to see Trent yell at people, which he doesn't do nearly enough, I wasn't gonna tell Trent about how I ran off from DJ and Scary Mari twice, 'cause then I'd get in trouble with him, too," Grace said, arms crossed. "Not as much as them, but still. Then I'd have to pull The Face, patent pending, so he'd forgive me just like that! The Face takes a lot of energy, and it was an exhausting day and my plan didn't work… And I can't be evilly adorable all the time!"
"Me and Zoey had a lemonade stand," Grace told him, taking an ugly Christmas sweater from a twelve year old boy, the sweater most likely from his grandmother. Grace walked toward DJ and Chester and Zoey walked back to take a girl's ex-boyfriend's letterman jacket.
The girl angrily threw the jacket at the raven-haired little girl, but it landed around her shoulders like she had merely put it on her. "Yeah, and Marilee and DJ were trying to get people to ride Chester for monies but Marilee chased this boy and gotted arrested by my Aunt Laura."
Trent looked freaked out by the last part, but shrugged as he said, "Sounds like you guys had an eventful day."
"Aww, I missed seeing Aunt Laura?" Selena said with a pout. Zoey nodded as she waddled off, still wearing the heavy jacket.
As DJ took it from her, a scruffy half dog-half wolf pup raced over to Zoey and hid behind her. "You came back!" Zoey exclaimed, throwing her arms around her neck. She noticed something in her mouth, so she gently took it, cringing a bit at the dog slobber. "What's this?"
Just then, Duncan and Geoff ran up, finally stopping once they saw the dog snarling at them from behind her. Geoff took note of the check in her hands and sighed in relief. "Nice, little dudette!"
"Uh, Geoff?" Selena started, looking confused. "What's with… your head?" She pointed to his forehead, which had a rock the size of her fist lodged into it.
"Duncan threw it at me," Geoff sighed sadly. "He got mad 'cause that dog took our check-"
"-After you practically handed it to it!" Duncan screamed back at him, interrupting him. He turned back to Fluffernutter and Zoey and ordered, "Zo, get out of the way go I can beat the tar out of that mutt!"
"No!" Zoey defiantly yelled, hugging the puppy. "Fluffernutter's my friend and I love her and she doesn't have tars in her!"
"… Fluffernutter?" Duncan looked confused.
"Wait, I thought it looked familiar! Isn't that the wolf dog thing that scared the snot out of Zack?" Geoff asked, scratching his rock in confusion.
Selena paused for a moment, gasping once something clicked in her mind. "Oh my gosh! Zack!" Tears brimmed in her eyes and she shakily said, "I-I can't believe I f-f-forgot my own b-boyfriend!" She covered her face and cried out, "I've never felt so stupid!"
"Really?" Duncan asked, eyes widening in shock. "Never?"
"I… I…" She slowly walked in the opposite direction, clutching her guitar to her chest and trying to keep herself composed, though not because Duncan's comment stung. It was all about Zack.
Marilee, who had been too busy with Chester and the money, noticed her friend walking off and looking moody, so she looked back at the group behind her. "What was that about?" She shook her head and muttered, "Never mind. Knowing Selena, it's probably a long story anyways…" She walked over to DJ to tell him where she was going and ran off after her.
"Okay, we'll get back to her later," Duncan grumbled, looking down at Zoey. "But what did you mean when you said this thing was your friend?"
"I don't wanna lie anymore," Zoey quietly said, apologetically looking at Grace before turning back to Duncan, who had taken a place by Trent, and sheepishly looked down at her feet. "Grace and me found Fluffy a while ago and we've been hidin' her under our bunk bed so you guys wouldn't find out about her."
Grace, standing besides her, quietly groaned and glared at her friend. "You just had to say my name too, didn't you?"
As they looked up to see Trent and Duncan looking back down at them, both looking very displeased. Zoey shook a bit in fear and hissed to Grace, "If I'm goin' down, I'm taking you with me!"
"That sounds like something I would say," Grace said with a sigh of defeat.
*T*S*R*
A familiar Latina walked up to Alejandro in line, her hip-hoppish clothes folded neatly in her hands. Instead of those, she was wearing a rather expensive looking navy blue halter dress with matching strappy high heels. So it was pretty much the opposite of her old outfit.
"Dios mío," she sighed, rolling her eyes. "That was more stressful than I thought. Let me destroy these rags before I stab someone."
Alejandro turned to her as the line crept farther up. Eyebrows raised, he said, "Rosalinda, you're the nice one in this family! You're not usually like this."
"I'm not usually forced to wear such hideous clothing," she reminded him. "Just because I'm nice doesn't mean I have to dress like a clod. What was the point of all that, anyway?"
"The point was to slowly work our way toward being on the third season of Total Drama." As the line moved a bit more, the two moved along with it. "The second season is halfway done by this point, but we could weasel our way into the next game."
"You know I don't like weaseling. And besides, don't you think that if we could, we would have gotten into the second season? I mean, we're siblings and we're good at rivaling!" She looked to the side and murmured, "Not to mention the fact that our uncle is Chris' boss…" She thought over what he had said before and asked, "And what's this our and we stuff? I'd like to compete with you and all, but you didn't do anything today!"
"That's where you're wrong, mi hermana," Alejandro slyly said as the line slowly kept moving. "I just struck up some conversation with Trent and one of the newcomers. And even though I only talked to her for three minutes, I've already earned her trust… As I easily could with the others…" He smirked to himself and Rosalinda looked at him, clearly unsure.
"Whatever you say, Alejandro. I still don't think it will work."
"You'll see," he told her, finally getting close enough to the front of the line to see Marilee, DJ and Chester. He narrowed his eyes and quietly said, "Next season, they'll all see, as well. One by one, they'll all go down…"
*T*S*R*
"I'm the worst girlfriend ever!" Selena cried, face buried in her hands. Shaking from her crying, she looked back at the camera and squeaked, "I'm sorry, Zack. First I was wooed by Justin in the woods, then I asked if Chester was hot and now?" She crossed her arms over her chest in a shameful way and quietly said, "Why do I keep screwing this up?"
Marilee suddenly approached one of the transparent side walls of the phone booth and lightly knocked on it. "Selena, get out here."
Selena looked at her for a moment, then quickly put her hands over her face, as if that would completely hide herself.
Marilee looked on at her friend, unimpressed, then flatly and sarcastically said, "Oh no. Where did Selena go? She disappeared out of thin air." She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Do you seriously think I'm going to fall for that?"
Selena uncovered her face and looked down at her feet sadly. "You did for a second there…"
Marilee rolled her eyes, then slid the door open and forcibly pulled Selena, who grabbed her guitar before she could, out of the booth.
Back at Playa de Losers…
"Poor Selena," Bridgette, who was still in the Playa de Losers lounge, said as she continued watching the live feed being streamed to them. "She at least feels bad about swooning over that Alejandro guy."
Heather, seated next to her on the couch, nodded and said, "It's not like she made out with the guy or anything. But I don't know why she would swoon over him. He seems like such a schmuck!"
Izzy was standing on her head on the love seat next to them, but was still listening in on their conversation as she kept her balance. "Ooooooh, Heather's got a boyfriend!"
"What? I do not! I mean, I do, but not him! I just said I didn't like the guy at all!"
"That's what Courtney said last year about Duncan," Izzy pointed out, doing a flip and landing on her feet in front of them.
"Good point, but I'm all DJ's," Heather stubbornly said, crossing her arms and turning her nose up. "But we're not talking about DJ and me, so back to Selena. I feel bad for her and Zack. Is he still mad at her?"
"I don't think he was actually mad at her," Bridgette mused, placing her hands in her lap. "Just mad in general. I mean, they barely had any time together as a couple."
Izzy looked over at the teen curled up in the recliner across from her loveseat and told them, "Well, he had tons of time with his lady, but he's still a big gloomy pants about being kicked off!"
Bridgette and Heather looked over at Keith, who was in the fetal position with a tub of vanilla ice cream tucked between his legs and stuffing handfuls of creamy goodness into his bawling mouth. Bridgette, looking concerned for her brother, asked, "Uh, Keith? Wouldn't you at least like a spoon?"
Keith looked up at her with watery eyes and choked out, "Marilee loved spoons!" He continued sobbing and shoveling ice cream into his mouth with his hand.
Izzy walked over to him and grabbed the tub from him. She smiled her crazy smile and said, "If you wanna eat this stuff faster, you should eat like Izzy!" She stuck her face in the carton and started lapping it up like a dog, getting the sugary goop all over her face and in her hair. At least it made Keith stop crying, since he was too busy cringing in disgust to sob.
Bridgette walked over to him and rested a hand on his droopy shoulder. "I'm sorry I brought you out here, Keith. I thought maybe seeing that Marilee was doing okay would make you feel better…" She sheepishly looked down and muttered, "Guess I was wrong."
Keith stopped crying, but continued to sniffle. "Thanks for trying, sis. I guess it helps a little." He turned back to the television, seeing that his girlfriend was still on screen.
Outside the Confession Booth, Marilee slung an arm around her slumped shoulder and lead her toward their destination. "You're being too hard on yourself, Selena. I'm sure Zack understands. And if he doesn't…" She looked at the camera that was following them and said, "I'll bet his good friend Keith will be there to talk some sense into him."
"I don't wanna talk sense into people," Keith grumbled with a pout. "I just wanna sulk and act all girlish to get a laugh from the readers…"
Marilee raised an eyebrow, took her arm away from Selena and glared at the camera, hands on her hips. "I don't care if you don't want to do it, Keith! Or if the readers laugh at your wimpiness or not! I told you to go check up on him!"
Keith crossed his arms, shut his eyes and whined, "But baaaaabe!…"
She leaned closer to the camera and exclaimed, "Don't you 'but babe' me, mister! Go make Zack feel better. NOW!"
"Aww," Keith whined, slowly standing up from the recliner. "Even when she's not here, she's bossing me around!" As he left, Bridgette sympathetically patted him on the back and Heather sadly waved while Izzy was liking the bottom of the empty ice cream carton. Once he was at the door, he looked back at the screen, seeing that Marilee had calmed down and was giving Selena a hug to make her feel better. "Man, I miss her…"
*T*S*R*
Once almost everyone was gathered by the parking lot near the Torontonian border, except for a choice few, Chris walked over to two very large square machines placed where the hijacked pickup truck had been. This made the Ravens realize-
"Our truck's missing!" Courtney yelled in shock.
"Thanks, Captain Obvious In Training," Gwen said, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. "It's not like it matters anymore, anyways…" As Courtney glared at her, Gwen looked around and realized something. "And where's Cody?"
Like clockwork, Cody was wheeled toward the small group in his wheelchair by none other than Sierra. Both his arms were broken and he had a huge bandage around his head. It wasn't as bad as the full body cast he had gotten last year, but it was still pretty bad. "Oh, Cody! I'm so so SO sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you!" Sierra cried, her dark eyes full of tears.
Gwen, Courtney and LeShawna all gasped, running over to their injured teammate. Even a few Ferrets looked concerned. "What happened to the poor thing?" LeShawna asked, touching his bandaged arm lightly. However, even that sent him into a screaming fit of pain.
"He was driving a truck b-but I g-got in his way and he-sw-sw-swerved to save me!" Sierra sniffled, wiping her nose on her arm.
"How many times do I have to tell you I was trying to get away from you!" Cody screamed, not caring how much it made his scraped-up face hurt.
"I know!" Sierra squeaked, hugging him and ignoring his pain-filled whines. "You tried getting away from me so you could save my life! You're soooo heroic!"
LeShawna raised an eyebrow and told her, "I don't think that's what he meant, but whatever helps you sleep at night, hun…"
"Who the heck are you?" Chris cried, throwing his arms in the air in frustration. "You're not on the show! You can't be here!"
"I could be on the show!" Sierra cried, suddenly looking ecstatic and running over to the host. "It would be an honor being on the greatest show ever with the greatest host ever!"
Chris couldn't help but smile from the compliment. "I kinda like you. You're mega creepy, but I like you."
Sierra nodded. "I get that a lot."
"However, I still can't allow it. So scat," Chris said, trying to wave her off.
"Anything for you! Or Cody! But you asked and he didn't, so this time it's just for you!" Sierra bounced off, but not before giving Cody one last hug.
"Okay," Chris started, acting like nothing had happened. "Now, let's get all your donations and count them up!" He placed a hand on one of the square machines and explained, "These nifty little devices will count up your money, cash or checks, and whichever team's machine has the most money counted up will win!"
"These look like the ticket counter things they have at Chuck E. Cheese," Selena said, walking over and touching the metal box with her pointer finger, as if she thought it was fake.
Chris slapped her hand away and while she held it in pain and pouted, Chris told her, "That's because these are. I got this mechanic to rig them to count money instead of skeeball tickets. It was cheaper than hiring an accountant… Though we probably could have gotten a discount if I hired Geoff and Marilee's future step-dad." Chris gave the two a cocky look, but Marilee knew it was mostly aimed at her.
"Okay, how does Chris know about that?" Marilee asked, clearly irritated. "I mean, the others knew, because I went on a tirade the night I found out about it, but Chris lives farther away from us! How could he have heard about it?"
"Well, you do yell pretty loud, sis," Geoff said as he stood next to her.
When she looked over at him, she screamed in shock and asked, "When the freak did you get in here?"
"Just a few seconds ago," Geoff told her, pointing to the door behind him. "This phone booth has a really quiet door. I mean, you didn't even notice me until-"
"Get out!"
"But first off, we'll start with the Fighting Ferrets!" DJ and Marilee walked over and shoved their dollars one by one into the slot, and Geoff hung back by Chris, who looked around curiously. "Uh, you seem to be missing more than half of your team, guys. Where are Trent, Duncan, Grace and Zoey?"
"You actually care where they are?" Gwen asked, actually shocked.
"Not really, but their parents and their lawyers might!"
LeShawna rolled her eyes and grumbled, "Figures."
*T*S*R*
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No, Duncan!"
"Yes, Zoey!"
Zoey, who actually looked angry for once, crossed her arms and glowered. "Fluffernutter doesn't wanna live at some dumb old shelter!"
"Hey, I wanted to let the thing live in the sewers, but Trent here said no!" Duncan yelled, pointing to Trent. "I'm just saying, dude, there are lots of rats down there for it to chase and-" The musician elbowed him in the gut, making him shut up, except for a small "Ow!"
Grace, who was seated on the bench by Fluffernutter, looked at the dog to her left. She was laying on her side, and Grace scratched her belly before looking at the animal shelter across the street and then up at her brother, who had recently taken the empty seat next to her. "Do we hafta do this, Trent?"
Sighing, Trent rested his hand on her back and softly patted it. "Yeah. Sorry, kiddo, but it's for the best. She'll be happier here than she would be cooped up under your bed."
"B-But we love her," Grace said, looking back down at the puppy. "And she loves us! She'll be so sad if she goes and lives someplace else! Can't we keep her!" She hugged his arm tightly, looked up at him with huge, teary eyes and pleaded, "Pretty, pretty please with nine million bajillion cherries on top?"
"Uh… Well… You really shouldn't…" He couldn't help but stare into her sad, sad eyes and feel like a total jerk for what he was doing. He looked back up at Duncan, who had still been arguing with Zoey and sheepishly said, "Y'know, maybe they could just-"
"Don't fall for it, man!" Duncan yelled at him. "You can't just do whatever she says because she looks at you with those…" He had turned to look at Grace, who was looking back at him with her glassy, pleading eyes and paused for a moment, looking as if he was in a hypnotic trance. "Those big… brown… sad, little…." He shook his head, as if shaking her affect on him away, and yelled, "No! No no no! Just don't fall for it!"
Grace crossed her arms, clearly disappointed. "Rats," she grumbled so no one could hear her. "That woulda worked if Mister No Emotions wasn't here…"
"Look, don't you girls think there was a reason she keeps running off?" Trent asked Grace and Zoey. "She doesn't want to be cooped up in our stuffy cabin."
"But she'd be cooped up in a stuffy cage if we leave her there!" Grace argued, pointing to the shelter angrily.
Trent sighed, rubbing his forehead. Trying to convince a stubborn little kid to do something she didn't want to was nearly impossible.
"But if we leave her here, then she'll get adopted and be able to run around as much as she wants," Trent told her, trying to convince her. "Don't you want her to be happy?"
Grace looked back down at the wolf puppy, then reluctantly nodded. "Okay, fine." She shook Fluffernutter awake and quietly said, "Time for you to go, girl…" She stood up and Trent started walking them over to the shelter, but looked back at Duncan and Zoey and asked, "You guys coming?"
As Zoey walked over to Fluffernutter and gave her one last tummy rub, Duncan shook his head. "Nah, man. I kind of want to talk to Zoey about something."
Trent nodded, then continued to go over to the animal shelter with Grace and Fluffernutter. Duncan looked back at Zoey, who had taken a seat on the now-empty bench. "So… How long did you hide that from everyone?"
"Like a week," Zoey sheepishly said. "Maybe two…"
Duncan took a seat next to her, nodding. "Impressive." Zoey looked back up at him, confused. Wasn't he mad before? "When I first hid Petey from Ma and Pops, I was only able to keep him hidden under my bed for five days…" His brow furrowed in thought and he muttered, "Now that I think about it, maybe that's why he finally ran away…"
"Petey?"
Duncan sighed, leaning further back on the bench. "Yeah, guess it was about time you found out about Petey… When I was a few years older than you, I found him rooting around in the neighbor's garbage one night. I had seen him around the neighborhood before, lots of people had, but he didn't have an owner. I had always wanted a dog, but the 'rents said no. Probably because I shaved my friend's mom's cat a few weeks before then, but that's another story."
"So you hid your doggy, too?" Zoey asked. "And he ran away?" She frowned and patted her brother on the arm. "That's so sad! Is that why you hate dogs?"
The punk nodded, his expression a little more soft as he looked over at the shelter, though he couldn't see through the tinted windows. "Yeah. I guess it is. And why I got so mad when I heard you had been hiding one like I did. Because I knew you'd have to go through the same thing. I didn't want you to be hurt like I was…."
"Aww!" Zoey gave him a big hug and squealed, "You're the nicest, bestest brother ever!"
Duncan patted her back, but rolled his eyes at that statement.
Duncan shook his head, smirking. "If that kid had another brother, she'd realize what a total douche I actually am…" He shrugged and added, "But she lost her dog, so I didn't wanna crush her dreams too much. Ignorance is bliss, after all. Selena's living proof of that."
Selena glared at the camera and whined, "Even when I'm miles away, Duncan still somehow finds a way to insult my lack of smart molecules!"
*T*S*R*
After DJ and Marilee finally finished putting their money in the Fighting Ferrets' money machine and Selena had done Trent's guitar case full of money, the Fluffernutter-less foursome joined the group, which left just two other people missing. Duncan, catching on pretty quickly, pulled his and Geoff's check out of his pocket and stuffed it in the slot. Trent looked over at Geoff, then raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Uh, Geoff? Why do you still have that rock Duncan threw at you stuck in your forehead?"
Geoff smiled and shrugged. "I got used to the pain. It feels kind of good now. It's made my head all numb and happy."
Marilee rolled her eyes. "You didn't need the rock's help with that, bro…"
"Okay, while we wait for our total, let's let the Raving Ravens cough up their dough," Chris said, looking over at the other team.
Courtney took the few hundred dollars that she and Cody had earned and stuffed it into the machine. LeShawna sheepishly pulled a few crumpled dollars out of her pocket, looking down at them with sadness.
"That's all you two got?" Courtney asked as she put her hands on her hips, irritated.
"We did earn a lot more than that, but… but it sort of backfired," Gwen told her, not wanting to mention LeShawna's awful dancing being their downfall.
After LeShawna ironed out the money and put it in the machine, she looked all around. "Where are Jovie and Candace? They've been gone a while. I'm starting to worry…"
"While we wait for those two flakes to get back," Chris began, looking back at the Ferrets, "let's see what our money bag team has totaled!" He pushed a big red button on the front of their money counter, and the total amount they all earned flashed onto the small screen in big, red digital numbers. "Fifty four hundred dollars?"
Everybody excluding Geoff and Duncan gasped, eyes bugging out in shock. "H-How is that even possible?" Courtney half-yelled. "We've had less than ten hours! That's over five hundred dollars an hour!"
"We have our ways, princess," Duncan cockily said with a smirk.
"Well, whatever ways you have, I think they're gonna lead to your victory!" Chris looked out at the road, not seeing Jovie and Candace rushing over any time soon. "While we wait for them, we might as well see what you morons came up with…" As the Ravens glared at him, Chris pushed their button and a comical fart sound played as their total flashed onto the screen. After seeing the tiny total, Chris burst out laughing, as did the other team.
"You only raised four hundred?" Duncan choked out, clutching his gut from laughing so hard.
"And six!" LeShawna yelled, reminding everyone of the pathetic amount she and Gwen supplied, even though she knew it didn't make much difference.
Gwen crossed her arms angrily as the Ferrets laughed at them, glaring at one in particular. "Trent! How could you?"
Trent let out a few more laughs, wiping his tears of joy away. "S-Sorry, babe! It's-It's just… so small!"
"Well, it won't be that way for long!" Courtney rebutted, trying to sound convinced, even though she was not at all. "When Candace and Jovie come back, they'll-"
"Wait, so nobody's seen those two in a while?" DJ interrupted, suddenly looking scared. "What if they got hurt?"
"Come on, that's not likely," Courtney told him. "It's not like they could have been doing anything dangerous or life-threatening."
"Weren't they talking about mobs during lunch though?" Cody asked, eyes widening in fear.
Courtney rolled her eyes. "Oh, they were just looking for attention. I don't blame them, considering Selena and Marilee hog the show's spotlight so much."
"Hey!" the two blondes yelled, clearly offended.
Chris nodded in agreement and said, "Considering that those two have failed to show up, I'm guessing they forfeit! Which means that the Fighting Ferrets are our winn-"
"WAIT!"
Everyone spun around, seeing the missing duo running toward them. Jovie was lugging a huge bullet-proof suitcase with her. As they skidded to a halt, the Fighting Ferrets, Cody and Chris all looked confused by their new appearances. "Wait, you guys got makeovers?" Marilee exclaimed. "Why did you get makeovers?"
Candace shrugged and explained, "We needed to disguise ourselves or else we'd be swimming with the fishes."
"Oh, okay, tha- Wait, what?"
Candace ignored Marilee freaking out and turned around to find Geoff staring at her, mouth agape. "Hi, Geoff!" She posed sexily and asked, "Like my new look?"
Geoff didn't answer for a moment, but when he finally did, it was barely a mumble. "Heart attack, BRB…"
As he fainted, Candace giggled. "Oh, Geoff! You're so funny!" She looked down at him, seeing that he wasn't springing back up and chuckling, and suddenly looked more concerned. "… Geoff?" She poked his side with the tip of her foot, but he didn't budge. "Wake up! And why is there a rock lodged in your forehead?"
"Uh… Okay then," Cody said, barely able to look down at him, since his neck was in a neck brace. Since Jovie and Candace were right in front of him, he was at least able to look at them. "Wow, when did this happen?"
"When you were running that kiosk Courtney mentioned at lunch," Jovie answered, looking at the total on their money counter. "Which you apparently didn't do that good of a job with."
"Oh, yeah… I was a little busy getting molested," he quietly grumbled, but then looked back up at her. "But you look great!"
Jovie gave him a small smile. "Really?" LeShawna was shaking Geoff in attempts to wake him up. He still didn't.
As Grace kicked Geoff to try and wake him up, Cody smiled back and tried to nod, but couldn't. "Really."
"You're sweet, you know that?" Jovie reached out to pat him on the head, but withdrew her hand and asked, "Uh, not that I didn't notice before, but what's with all the injuries?"
"I crashed Earl's truck into a brick wall…"
"… Why?"
"Long story," Cody sighed. Gwen was finally able to wake Geoff up, but only by kicking him in the kiwis. He looked down at the silver suitcase and asked, "By the way, what's in the case?"
She lifted it up and smirked. "The answer to our prayers." Once everything calmed down and everyone gave Geoff some room, Jovie and Candace proudly walked up to Chris. "Chris, I'm not entirely proud to say that we raised…" Jovie popped the case open, revealing neat stacks of money and finished, "five thousand dollars!"
Everyone gasped, and the Ferrets looked horrified. "Haha, yes!" Courtney cried, jabbing her finger in Duncan's chest. "I told you all our girls would pull through for us!"
"You got lucky, toots," Duncan said, clearly trying to hide his anger.
"Lucky they got, indeed," Chris announced. "they won by a mere six dollars!"
"Yeah, that wasn't so useless after all, now was it?" LeShawna smugly said, crossing her arms and shutting her eyes in pride.
"Looks like one of your sorry butts is going home," the host said, shooting a glance at the sad Fighting Ferrets. "We'll just get back on the plane and-"
"There y'all are!"
Everybody spun around and saw a hefty Southern-looking man charging as fast as his short legs could take him. He stopped a few feet away from the Raving Ravens and shouted, "Them's there be them dang ol' teeny-boppers who stole mah dang ol' truck!"
"You must be Earl!" Candace exclaimed, extending her hand out to him. "I'm Candace and I…" Her voice feigned as he glared at her and she quickly took back her hand and rubbed the back of her head awkwardly.
"Let me guess," Chris started, walking between Candace and Earl. "This is the guy you stole the truck from. The truck that you crashed?"
"WHAT?" Earl tossed his trucker hat on the ground and shouted a copious amount of slurs, which could have been curses for all they knew. He was talking too fast and too Southern to tell. After he was done, he got right in Chris' face. "Y'all better gets me a new truck, dangflabit! I'll sue fer everythang y'all are worth!"
"Sheesh, calm down, Billy Ray," Chris said, holding his hands up. "Why don't I just get you a new truck? That heap you had couldn't have been more than what, thirty bucks?"
"It was worth over four thousand dollars, ya yellabelly!"
"What? That pile of scrap metal?" Courtney exclaimed, only making Earl more angry. "Where is Chris going to get that kind of money?"
"Right here!" The handsome host slammed the lid of the case of money shut and took it from Jovie, shoving it into Earl's chest. As a few of the Ravens argued in protest, Chris loudly reminded them, "Who hijacked this hairy man's truck? Who crashed his truck?" They didn't have much of a response to that, so he nodded. "Yeah, I thought so…" He looked back at Earl, who was grinning widely as he poked around inside the suitcase. "Okay, you got your money and ruined these teens' chances of winning, now get lost." He shoved Earl off screen, turning back to the Ravens. "Looks like you guys are back to being losers. And the Fighting Ferrets are once again our winners!"
Said team let out loud cheers, while the other one slumped and sulked.
"I love that euphoric feeling you get when you win," Marilee happily said. She leaned her back against the glass wall and dreamily sighed, "I love winning almost as much as I love spoons…"
"Guess we did all that for nothing," Jovie told Candace with a sad sigh.
"Yeah," Candace said, trying her best to smile. "But I can honestly say that going to 699 Main Street and joining the mob was an enjoyable experience for me."
"Speak for yourse-" Jovie did a double take at her and said, "Wait, 699?"
"Yeah, that was the street number of that abandoned business where we met Big Daddy. Why?"
Jovie looked up at the billboard that had led them to the mob in the first place, and her voice shook in what seemed to be fury. "Candace… The billboard right there said the job was located at 669 Main Street!"
Candace's eyebrows furrowed in thought and she pulled Earl's Hooters receipt out of her shorts pockets. "But I wrote the number down, see!" She handed it to Jovie and it clearly said '699'. That is, until Jovie flipped the paper upside down and it read '669'.
"… Oh. What was that building, then?"
"It was a candy store!"
"Oh… Oh. That sounds like it would have been fun!"
"More fun than getting chased by pitbulls and almost dying!" Jovie cried, looking ready to strangle her.
"Hee hee…" She nervously rung her hands and muttered, "I guess that explains why Big Daddy said he was 'expecting us' and kept calling us Constance and Joanie… I thought he was just having a Lindsay moment…"
Meanwhile, in the Happy Fun Yummy Candy Emporium…
A muscular strawberry blonde in her early twenties was grumpily yanking a large glob of pink taffy on a taffy stretcher, trying her best not to let the sticky stuff touch her leather jacket. "This gig ain't at all like what Vick described the otta day," she told her partner in a thick Italian accent.
A woman with dark skin and a frightening scar running from her eye and down her cheek nodded, handing a chocolate bar to a kid from behind the counter. "Pipe down, Constance. I didn't think Big Daddy would be a skinny Jewish guy either, but you don't hear me complaining."
"Shaddup, Joanie!"
"You shaddup!"
*T*S*R*
The entire cast was seated in a room in the back of the plane they had arrived in while Chef and the interns were in the cockpit up front. The Ravens were seated in the front two rows of a set of bleachers in front of Chris' podium, while the Ferrets were in the back two rows.
"Well, I hope you all had a good time giving back," Chris said, hiding something under the podium. "And hopefully, you got something in return."
"I got a new guitar," Selena said, holding up her treasure.
"I got an awesome new look!" Candace joyously said, standing up to spin around and show off said look.
"I got one, too!" Jovie exclaimed.
"I got several broken bones," Cody mumbled, looking at his bandaged arms and leg.
"I got a rat in my pants," Gwen grumbled, crossing her arms and frowning at the memory.
"I got a rock," Geoff sadly said, pointing to the rock lodged in the middle of his forehead.
Chris tried holding back a laugh, but failed. "Haha… Charlie Brown references…" He motioned to the platter of peanut-filled barf bags he pulled out from under his podium and said, "Instead of our traditional marshmallows, I thought this plane setting would mean a change in invincibility was in order! If you don't- Wait, none of you are allergic to peanuts, are you?"
The losing team shook their heads and Chris sighed in relief. "Okay, good. Our mobster mamas over there already rumbled with attack dogs. I wouldn't want to give your parents another reason to sue the show… Regardless, you guys know the drill. No peanuts, no chance at half a million dollars. The first camper to receive a barf bag is… Gwen."
Courtney quietly huffed as Chris tossed the Goth a bag. Once she caught it, her nose wrinkled in disgust and she quickly dropped the bag. "Ugh, why is it so slimy? Please tell me those bags aren't used…"
"Okay," Chris said with a cheeky grin. "I won't tell you, then. The next bag goes to… Courtney.
The former CIT caught her bag, then sat it down and wiped her hands off on Duncan's pants, since he was conveniently seated behind her.
"… Candace." The redhead squealed in delight, catching her bag and shoveling half of the peanuts into her mouth.
"Jovie." Once hearing her name, she uncrossed her fingers and cheered when he tossed her bag to her.
Chris turned to the last two campers: LeShawna and Cody. "Look's like you two are the only ones left for tonight. LeShawna, you lost almost all of the money you and Gwen earned. Cody, you crashed a bumpkin's truck, which messed you up pretty bad, and pretty much cost your team the win so you all could cover the damage. And speaking of which, LeShawna was the one who found the truck in the first place!" he exclaimed, pointing to LeShawna and only making her more nervous. "I gotta say, it's no wonder one of you is going home…"
He walked over to the door leading to the exit of the plane with the bag of peanuts in his hand and slowly said, "And the final barf bag goes to…
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Chris never did announce one of their names. Instead, he threw the door open, sending a gush of freezing wind into the small room. He tossed the bag out the door, making more than a few contestants gasp.
"What did you do that for?" Cody cried out. "Who's staying?"
Chris slammed the door. "Neither of you!"
"What?" LeShawna stood up and stormed over to him. Poking him in the chest, she growled, "You better quit playin' with us, boy!"
"I'm not," Chris said, shoving her finger away from him. "What's the fun in doing a double elimination if I tell you all about it?"
"What?" both Cody and LeShawna exclaimed, the overall shock of being eliminated finally hitting them. Cody was crestfallen while LeShawna was more angry than anything else. "You can't do that! It's not-"
"Fair. I know." Chris crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Since when has this show or its host been fair?"
"… Since never," LeShawna sighed, looking down at the floor in disappointment.
*T*S*R*
"Chris is such a jerk," Bridgette said, seated to Zack's left on the comfy couch in the Playa de Losers lounge. She reached into the bowl of popcorn in his lap and grabbed a few pieces, popping them into her mouth. "Cody and LeShawna shouldn't have both been voted off. I mean, I'll be happy to see them when they get here because they're my friends, but still…"
"Yeah, sucks to be them," Keith, seated to Zack's right, said with a nod, shoveling popcorn into his mouth.
"Why are we all so surprised he'd pull something like this?" Zack asked, raising an eyebrow. "It's Chris. CHRIS."
Bridgette and Keith looked deep in thought and finally nodded in agreement after a few minutes. "Good point," Bridgette said, then smiled at him. "I'm glad you're feeling better."
Zack grinned a little and sheepishly shrugged. "Yeah, I freaked out a little before… Selena is pretty bad at thinking before she talks, after all. Maybe I should apologize to Jamal…"
Bridgette waved a dismissive hand and mumbled, "Don't. It's just Jamal."
Keith chuckled, grabbing another handful of popcorn. "Who knew you could be so harsh, sis?"
Bridgette giggled, leaning farther into the couch. "I'm full of surprises. Just like you. I mean, sobbing like a PMSing girl?" As Keith blushed in embarrassment, both Bridgette and Zack laughed and looked back at the television.
Chris opened the exit of the plane again once Cody and LeShawna said most of their goodbyes. However, there were still a few that were saved for last.
LeShawna was standing by the exit of the plane with a parachute securely on her back. She gave Gwen one last hug, then looked back at her little sister. Clinging to the side of the opening with one hand, she gave her a small, sad grin. "Win for us Jones girls, okay?"
Jovie sadly smiled back, nodding. "Will do…" She wheeled Cody over and gave LeShawna a big hug, both trying to be strong. Once they released each other, LeShawna gave the whole crew one last wave before jumping out of the plane and screaming her head off in fright.
She didn't even want to think about seeing her sister plummet to her death, so she turned to Cody instead, parachute sitting in his lap. She rubbed her arm and apologetically said, "Sorry you got voted off. I didn't vote for you or anything, but I'm still sorry."
"I'm not too torn up about it," Cody admitted, looking at his wounds. "I wouldn't be much use, anyway… It's kind of funny, though," he chuckled, looking to the side. "Y'know, leaving the game in a wheelchair two seasons in a row…"
"I'll say…" Jovie looked at the camera and glared. "But it ain't your fault Kelsey don't have a creative bone in her body!"
A sixteen year old girl with short blonde hair, a purple t-shirt and rolled up jean shorts was sitting in the Restroom Confessional, looking like she was ready to cry. "Give me a break, I'm trying here! I thought it would be funny!" She crossed her arms, her sadness fading, and she threateningly said, "Jovie needs to learn to watch her mouth. I created her, you know. I could destroy her just as easily! … Or at least vote her out next episode!"
Chef flung the door to the confessional open, grabbing Kelsey by her arm. "Who let your sorry behind in here? Quit breaking the fourth wall, Lindsay wannabe!" With that, Chef yanked her out and the screen went to static.
"But I'd like to thank you, Cody," Jovie began, smiling down at him. "You sort of helped me get out of my shell, be more open-minded to new stuff, y'know? I've still got some work to do, but I'm getting there!"
Cody chuckled, nodding as much as he could, despite his injured neck. "You have fun, okay?"
"Sure will," Jovie quietly said, leaning down to his eye level. "Take care now…" She gave him a friendly peck on the cheek, and since his back was unfortunately turned to the door, her kiss pushed him back and sent him plummeting out of the plane, wheelchair and all.
Jovie leaned out of the plane as much as she could without falling out and looked at him falling with wide, fear-filled eyes. "CODY! Oh my Lord, he's gonna be…" She stopped, then said, "No, wait. He pulled the string with his non-bum hand… Okay, okay, he's good."
"Wheelchair-ridden Cody gets shoved off of something to his death," Chris muttered to himself, rolling his eyes. "That Kelsey chick should not be allowed to write…"
Kelsey suddenly ran into the room, a sweaty mess from running away from Chef and huffed, "I'd… like to… see you… write better!" As she wiped off her forehead with the back of her hand and tried to catch her breath, Chef ran in, grabbed her, and tossed her onto his shoulder. After he carted her out, kicking and screaming, everyone looked a little more than freaked out.
"I really need to get a new fourth wall," Chris muttered, trying to make a mental note of that. "This shows' was clearly destroyed a long time ago…"
Selena, who seemed a bit off about something, looked around the new confessional and sat down. "Um, I'm not sure if this is a confessional or not, but there's a camera, so I'm just gonna assume it is. I need to get something off of my chest."
She faced the camera and said, "Zack, I'm a terrible girlfriend. You know that, I know that. It took me longer than you to realize it, most likely, but at least I finally got it through my head. You deserve better than me, and you most certainly don't deserve to be stuck with me when we're not even physically together. But I just want to say…" Tears were slowly building in her eyes and she quietly said, "I completely understand why you broke up with me."
"DUDE!" Keith cried, grabbing the bowl of popcorn and dumping it over Zack's head. "Why'd you break up with her, moron? It's not like she made out with that Ale-whoever guy or anything! And look at her, she's almost half as hot as Marilee! That's seriously hot!"
"Keith, how on earth would Zack have been able to break up with her without either of us knowing?" Bridgette asked, trying to calm him down. "He's been with either you or me the entire day! Not to mention the fact that he has no way of getting in touch with her and-"
"Shh, she's talking again!" Zack cried, pushing the empty bowl off of his head. He wanted to know what the heck she was talking about…
"I knew if you were here with me, you'd be able to do it in person, but since you can't, I did the liberty of letting you break up with me for you…" She poked the side of her head, narrowed her eyes and whispered, "In my mind…"
Izzy, who had just recently joined the group and sat Indian style in front of their couch, blinked in confusion and muttered, "That girl's insane…"
"But the point is, there are no hard feelings," Selena said, softly hugging herself and trying her best not to cry. "It's not me, it's you, you'd still like to be friends, you went over all the basic break-up bases… Thanks for at least being nice about it. I didn't deserve such kindness, but you could never break my heart like that, could you?" She sadly smiled, but that smile quickly faded and was replaced with a flood of tears and sobbing.
All four losers looked at the screen confusedly, even after she ran out of the confessional. "Um… Could somebody explain to me what just happened?" Keith asked, scratching his head.
Bridgette, who had started pulling popcorn out of Zack's dark brown hair to help clean him up, looked down at Zack sadly. He looked straight ahead, a devastated expression on his face. As he finally pieced together what Selena had said, he quietly murmured, "I think I just dumped my girlfriend…"
"Oh, SNAP!" Kelsey cried, gray-blue eyes wide in excitement. "Poor Zack and Selena! Only that girl could make break-up drama crazily funny! And poor Cody and LeShawna!" The dramatic music stared playing and she asked, "What will be in store next time for our sibs? Will we explore the Gwen and Courtney rivalry more? Will Selena have Zack get back together with her in her mind? Will I write more shameless author insertion?"
The door burst open and Chef poked his head in the confessional once again. "Did you seriously think you could get away from me again?" He tried yanking her out, but she grabbed the sides of the doors with her hands, keeping her body from the belly up in the restroom. She grunted as she struggled to stay inside, looking at the camera with annoyance.
"Will Chef be mysteriously written out of this story in the next couple of chapters? Find out next time, in Total. Sibling. Rival-RYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Chef finally succeeded in yanking her away, which sent the both of them flying down the corridor and causing the off-screen crash.