XXIII. Mistake 19-Failure at Eavesdropping...Again

Okay, well, I think it finally got around to Sirius that I wasn't going to his New Years bash (took him long enough).

"What is this I hear about you not coming over for New Years?" I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. I could almost feel his scowl as he stood behind me. Instead, I gave a small sigh of exasperation.

"What about it?" I asked, not bothering to glance up from my book. I had been sitting in the common room relaxing now that I had no more homework to do as we'd had our last day of classes, and I was heading home for the holidays soon.

"You cannot refuse to come," Sirius said crossly, "Besides, I have news for you," he announced in a smug tone.

"Do you?" I asked, turning the page of my novel.

"Mind feigning interest for a bit?"

"Fine," I said, putting my book down, "What is your news?"

"James is breaking up with Emmeline."

"I heard," I said coolly, "Is that all?"

"Is that—well, I expected a little bit more of gratitude," he said huffily, sitting on the armrest and nimbly plucking my book from my hands, "Come on Lily, I don't know what happened between the two of you, but I know you both fancy the pants off each other."

"False," I said, reaching for my book, "Do you mind?"

"Yes, actually I do," he said, frowning, "You won't come to my party and now you're being just plain ungrateful," he pouted.

"Listen—whatever that was—James and I—it's over. Now give me back—"

"You're such a bad liar, Evans. Haven't we already been over this?"

"No I'm not, just give me back—"

"You're acting like a first year. Calm down," he said, looking amused, "Promise you'll come to my party," he said, holding the book way above his head.

"I'm not going," I repeated stubbornly. When was he going to get that through his thick skull? Besides, he thinks I'm the one acting like a first year?

"Why? What else do you have planned on New Years?" he pouted.

"Family stuff," I said quickly, "Now—"

"Liar," Sirius sang, "Why aren't you really? Why am I asking? I already know the answer: James." He must have noticed me stiffen because he started laughing. I don't know why. None of this is very funny…not at all, "I spoke with Marlene. She told me you were doing everything possible to forget about the bloke. Apparently you two got into a row…care to explain?"

"No." I was going to kill Marlene. She told Sirius? He was Potter's best mate! What was she thinking? I should have known they'd be in cahoots together.

"Lily," he began.

"Why don't you go bother James?"

"I would but you are much more entertaining, I must say," his lips twitched as I gave him a very doubtful look, "Honestly? I'd have a black eye by this point if I was badgering Prongs. Trust me, I tried to figure out when you two had snogged—"

"He told you?" I asked furiously, "He promised!"

"No," Sirius smirked widely now, "However, you just did. And to think, all this time, I thought you'd end up just as prudish as Emmeline! Merlin, Evans, do you just let anyone who wants to, snog you?"

It took me a moment to realize that he was joking. I smacked him in the arm, "Not funny," I muttered.

"Too soon?" he asked innocently, "Okay, okay, I'll play nice," he said with a deep sigh, "So I'm assuming he snogged—"

"It was just a small kiss," I muttered, "That's all."

"When?"

"I'm not telling you anything else," I snapped, feeling very irritable towards him. And he thought I was going to come to his party? Psh. We were so not mates anymore. (Not that we were previously anyway).

"Probably that one night when the two of you were acting weird. Then what happened? You became the turtle friend I never wanted." Er—what?

"The turtle friend?" I repeated in confusion. This boy just gets weirder and weirder.

"Yeah, hiding in its shell…I'm not stupid. McKinnon and I tried to figure out what was going on for ages—"

"It was only two weeks."

He glared at me for interrupting but continued smoothly as if I'd never spoken, "Like I said, we tried for ages and couldn't figure it out. Then Marlene came up to me this morning to tell me you were being stupid again."

"I'm not being stupid. I don't know why you keep trying to impose. None of this is any of your business!"

"It is my business," Sirius corrected, "We've been over this," he said with the air of talking to a simple minded girl, "Now, you are going to come to my party and look dashing and impress James who will once again sweep you off your feet, and you'll live happily ever after. Okay?"

"No," I said, managing to rip my book from his hands at last.

"Lilllly!" he cried, "What else can I say to convince you? I'll buy you chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate—"

"Why are you buying her chocolate?" asked James interrupting us. He had approached us so silently that not even sneaky Sirius Black heard him. I coughed awkwardly, and Sirius immediately quit his dramatic act, lowering his wild arm gestures. I took this as my opportunity to try and sneak away.

"Oh, trying to convince her to come to my party, right Lily?" he said, looking around for me. I'd made it behind both him and James but apparently not fast enough.

I froze and forced a smile, "Not happening, as you know, Black," I said attempting to keep my voice as light and friendly as possible. I was determined not to lose my temper this time, "Hello James," I added with a small nod. I think he was still mad at me because he just nodded coolly back.

"How'd it go?" Sirius asked. I really didn't want to be part of this conversation, "I hope you don't mind but I told Lily here," he said, dragging me back towards them as I tried to slip away, "Perhaps the two of you want to talk?"

"I don't think so, Sirius," James said, giving him a rather severe look.

"Er—fine," Sirius sighed, "No one ever listens to me anymore. The world would be such a better place if they did—"

I couldn't help it, I snorted. I know, I know unladylike and all that, but Sirius—I wouldn't trust him to buy my groceries let alone advise me on relationships.

"Hm...whatever you say Padfoot," James said, his lips also twitching, "Well, I still need to finish packing," he paused before leaving, "And Evans," he said turning to me for a moment, "Don't let me stop you from going to Sirius' party."

I watched him walk away and disappear upstairs, feeling absolutely furious. How dare he insinuate...the nerve of him! Sirius, however, looked pleased.

"See? There, now you have to come—" he began happily.

"Excuse me," I said, pushing past him without a backward glance.

"Wait, Evans, hold on—"

I ignored him and made my way up towards the boy's dormitory. I know I'm not allowed in there, but if James Potter thought he was going to get away with a comment like that-well, he had another thing coming! I flung open the door, feeling thankful only James was in there, unfastening his cloak.

"Evans?" he questioned, looking surprised. Psh. As if he didn't know I was about to come up and yell at him for his...impudence! Why did he always have to be such a prat!

"Don't even start to give me such…such…arrogance! You really think you're the reason I don't want to go to Sirius' party! You're so full of yourself, Potter!" I spat. I don't know why, but this felt good...refreshing almost. It felt good to yell at him. It was sort of like it used to be, "I'm sick of you going around acting as if you're so superior. You know there's plenty other blokes that would like to be with me besides you! So I don't care if you're with Emmeline or not! It doesn't matter!"

Okay, okay, so he might be right. Maybe he is the reason I'm not going to Sirius' bloody party, but I really don't want him thinking so highly of himself. Besides, even if he did know, he didn't need to rub it in my face!

"I'm really not in the mood for this, Evans," he said furiously, "I just broke up with my girlfriend as Sirius so kindly informed you, so why don't you bugger off?"

"You want me to…oh hell, you know, you don't seem to care what you say to people anymore do you! You want me to be honest, well; you need to try being bloody honest every once in awhile!"

"You don't think I'm honest?" he spat, "What about before Emmeline and I was dating? What then? I just didn't seem eligible? That wasn't honest enough for you? Did you not listen to me when I said how much I liked you? Or were you just ignoring me? You're pretty good at that, Evans. Ignoring things or problems or people! Just run away, right? Isn't that always the answer?"

"You're such a prat!" I yelled furiously. I went to smack him, but he caught my wrist and glared. Stupid seeker reflexes.

"I'm really not in the mood, Lily."

"Lily? Or Evans? Pick one, Potter," I said, pulling my wrist away, frowning deeply at him. He turned and stepped away.

"Fine, Evans," he said coldly, "Do you mind? I actually have something to do," he snapped angrily.

"Fine! I just wanted you to know that you were not the reason I'm not going to Sirius' party!"

"Good!" he yelled back, "What are you doing instead?"

"I'm—" I broke off. I really should have thought about this beforehand. "Er—I've got plans with my family," I said hurriedly.

He looked at me for a moment and then, to my utmost surprise, he laughed. Really? This was so not funny. "You're such a bad liar, Evans."

Er—okay?

"Why do you keep lying?" he asked in a serious tone. At least he wasn't yelling anymore. Actually, I sort of wish we were yelling. I don't mind that. I can always yell louder than him, so then I still feel like I've won—even if I haven't. Now he's giving me that half amused, half exasperated look that I feel like everyone is giving me these days.

"I'm not lying," I said immediately.

He sighed, "It doesn't work to say that when you're rubbish at lying," he explained as if I were some dimwitted first year. I really don't appreciate that. I realize I'm rubbish at lying but what does he expect me to say? The truth? Psh.

"I'm not—" I broke off, "Fine—I'm rubbish at lying."

"Okay, now why are you really not going to Sirius' party?"

"It's none of your business," I said, "But I just didn't want your ego to swell even more by letting you believe that rubbish about you being the reason for me not wanting to come. Things don't revolve around you," I snapped.

"Fine. You're right," he said shrugging, "Now do you mind?"

I suddenly felt extremely foolish, "Yeah, fine," I nodded. There was a long pause in which we just stared at each other. Feeling the need to fill the silence I added, "Er—well, sorry about you and Emmeline, by the way." Of course, I wasn't sorry, but I wasn't happy either so it's close enough.

"Yeah, it doesn't change anything though, does it?" he asked, sounding bitter.

"What do you mean?"

"You still hate me."

"I don't hate you," I said, frowning.

"Did you miss these last few minutes, Evans?" he asked, looking incredulous.

"No…just because I was yelling at you…you just…you make me so furious sometimes."

James just smiled weakly, "Fine, you don't hate me. I don't hate you. Just…make it to Sirius' party, yeah? He'll be really disappointed otherwise, I think."

"Okay, well," I shrugged, "I'll think about it."

"Alright," he said with a nod, "Happy Christmas Lily."

I nodded back, "Happy Christmas James," I said before leaving his room. I closed the door and leaned against once it snapped shut. I let out a heavy sigh and glanced back at the closed door for a moment.

Well. That was weird.

Following the strangest fight I've ever had with James, came a stroke of luck. (This is rare, I'm never very lucky). I didn't see him again before heading back home. I think it was better that way. Otherwise I probably would have been eaten alive by my conscious and give him some silly apology. Or worse, my feelings might just have spilled out as all my words seem to be doing lately. In other words, I avoided complete disaster-which as everyone is beginning to realize, it isn't very habitual. Regardless, I couldn't tell if he was still angry with me or just sick of fighting and deciding to appease me. Hm.

Either way, I suppose it's good. I haven't decided what I'm doing about New Years yet. I did have an awkward run in with Selene and Emmeline on the train. Marlene had been in the bathroom and they'd opened my compartment.

"Oops," Emmeline said then she realized it was me and she froze. We stared at each other for a long moment until Selene stuck her head in.

"Oh, Lily," Selene said, equally surprised.

"Er—hello," I said. I wanted to say something mean or sarcastic such as 'Heard about the break up. Pity it didn't work out.' In hindsight, it's probably fortunate that I didn't. Instead, they just stood there for a moment, and I stared back.

"We're just looking for a compartment," Selene explained one she found her voice, "But…um…have a good holiday, Lily," she said, giving me a shifty look as she looked between me and Emmeline. Ack. I can't even bear to stand the sight of her (Emmeline that is).

"Yeah, you too," I said, staring at the pair of them. They both looked embarrassed as they closed the door.

Well our friendship had crumbled pathetically. I really wanted to say something else to Selene, but I couldn't find the words. Marlene made it clear that she could care less about the situation, but Marlene tends to hold grudges, so I don't think she'll be getting over that anytime soon. Not without a proper apology, and if I'm honest with myself, it probably won't happen.

Marlene came back, and I didn't mention Selene's accidental visit (I wanted to have an enjoyable train ride). Marlene spent the entire train ride trying to convince me to go to Sirius' party. I just shrugged and tried to blow it off. I know I won't be getting off that easy, but it's nice to hope.

Either way, it was nice to be home and away from the drama of Hogwarts…sort of. Petunia was busy getting things ready for her wedding. My dad was going crazy with all the wedding planning, so I think he was relieved to have someone at home besides Petunia and my mum—all they talk about is the bloody wedding.

I know, I'm a girl, so I guess I'm supposed to like this sort of stuff but after three days of talking about the sort of lace she was going to get to match the doilies, I thought I was going to curse my mum and Petunia.

That's when my father suggested I have a bit of a break (bless the man). I wasn't hesitant to say the least. The next day, I owled Marlene, and we agreed to meet up in Diagon Alley. We said we'd meet a Flourish and Blotts (I needed new quills) around lunch time and then I suppose I had to buy Petunia a Christmas present (I had money left over since I never did buy Selene a Christmas gift). My mum was happy that I was getting out of sight because apparently I've been 'messing with Tunney's nerves'. Whatever that means. All I said was that the napkins looked a different shade of pink and she completely lost it. Petunia's a bit mad, but at least now I'm not the only one who thinks so. Dad agrees with me.

Anyway, I made my way the muggle way with my father- he had to go downtown to his office anyway. That's when I nearly walked in on a James and Emmeline reunion in the Leaky Cauldron.

You can just imagine my reaction.

Remember when I was saying I was over James and we would never be together? Well, that was a lie! I was just upset. In fact, I'd been thinking a lot over break about him. I nearly sent him a letter but being the cowardly Gryffindor I am, I never did. I reckoned that he needed a bit of time after breaking up with Emmeline-I didn't want to be a rebound for Godric's sake!

You think that would be something a bloke would realize. I mean, everyone says it's obvious I fancy him-so why the hell is he drooling over Emmeline Vance? He broke up with her! He kissed me! Me! Lily Evans! In the snow! Hm...I wonder if she knew that?

Either way, somehow I found myself sneaking into a booth behind them and spying on the 'happy couple' in the Leaky Cauldron. Well, I'm using the term couple very loosely. They weren't exactly acting like a couple. It's not like they were holding hands or anything. In fact, James almost looked annoyed...unless I'm imagining that. Emmeline...well, she just looks perfect as usual. I wonder what would happen if I used a frizz charm on her hair? Does that sort of hex even exist? Hmm...

Marlene is going to kill me for being late.

Or possibly not showing?

Oops.

Hopefully she'll understand. I mean, I couldn't just ignore this opportunity. The fact that they were here at the exact same time as me...well, it had to be fate...or something.

So yes, I tucked myself in a booth and tried to lean as close to them as possible. You see, they were murmuring. It was really difficult. They'd been talking for almost an hour, but all I got was a bit of Emmeline's sobbing. I could only hear what she was saying when she began to get hysterical which wasn't really intelligible either. I wonder if James could understand her because I certainly couldn't. Unfortunately, I couldn't hear what James was saying either. I don't think he was saying very much however. He just kept nodding a lot from my point of view.

"I just...I've really missed you," I caught Emmeline say. She sounded very emotional. She must've just quit it with the water works.

Urgh. Gag me.

"I got you something," she said brightly (and rather loudly). I tried to peek around the booth, making sure to hold the menu close to my face, only allowing my eyes to peek over the top. Well, the bleeding gift was wrapped, of course. I bent a little bit more over the edge, trying to get a decent view. Ack. Stupid Potter. Why couldn't he move his gift a bit more to the right when he unwrapped it so I could see it properly? That's when a not-so-brilliant idea occurred to me. Magic.

Now, magic does many wonderful things. It can heal people. It transfigures and charms. It can create wonderful spells, but (in my case) it can also make you look like an absolute fool. I attempted to levitate his gift into my line of vision. I only planned to move it a little to the right—he wouldn't have even have noticed (trust me, I'm excellent at Charms).

That's when a voice interrupted me-rudely may I add.

"Lily Evans!"

That led to me toppling out of my seat, my wand taking a sharp descent along with me...as did Potter's stupid gift.

Apparently it was something breakable. Er—oops?

Emmeline screamed while James and Marlene cursed. (Yes. Marlene had found me). Me? I sort of laid there, sprawled on the floor, frozen in shock. Merlin-I need to get better reflexes. If I'm in a crisis situation, I don't want to stand there and gape at them like a fish! Maybe I should ask James for some seeker lessons-only if I could remain on the ground though. Well...argh! Focus!

"What are you doing?" Marlene demanded at me, "And what are you two doing here?" she snapped at James and Emmeline.

"Your present!" Emmeline cried, ignoring Marlene completely.

"Marlene?" James asked in confusion, "Lily?" he added, looking at me on the ground, "Why are you on the floor—?"

"Get up," Marlene snapped in exasperation.

"It's ruined," Emmeline continued to wail. I looked around. There were broken shards of glass and weird white flakes scattered across the floor. Er-what the hell was that supposed to be anyway? Emmeline was quick to answer my unvoiced question, "It was a crystal ball. I charmed it myself," she sniffed, "It was of Hogwarts, and it had us skating out on the ice...remember that?" she asked, tears in her eyes.

Oh please. Like he was going to fall for that...

"Hey, Em," he said, giving her shoulders a reassuring squeeze, "It was wonderful," he assured her. Emmeline nodded, shooting me the most horrible glare. James wasn't daft; he noticed. "It was an accident," he explained, "And you know, it's always the thought that counts," he said, smiling at her.

"Yes, well," she sniffed, still looking at me and Marlene with her dirtiest glare, "What a surprise to see you here Lily...been here long?"

"No," I said quickly, "Not too long."

Marlene snorted, and James even looked skeptical.

"Not eavesdropping were we?" she asked with narrowed eyes.

"No!" I said hotly.

I couldn't. They weren't talking loud enough.

"Well," Emmeline gave us a haughty look and turned around, "We should probably get back to our lunch."

"Yeah...we have shopping to do," I said, gesturing to Marlene. I was still sitting on the floor, I realized. I hastily got to my feet.

"Still Christmas shopping?" James asked, his eyes twinkling.

"Er—yes, some people are difficult to shop for," I said, but I wasn't really paying attention to what I was saying. I was just staring at him. Emmeline noticed because she coughed loudly and tugged on James' arm. I blinked and looked away. Marlene was frowning beside me as she asked.

"I thought you just needed quills?"

"Shut up, Marlene," I hissed, "Er—we'll see you guys later," I said quickly, "Bye James, bye Emmeline. So sorry about the snowball thing," I added, giving her an awkward, short wave.

Emmeline's lips pursed like Petunia's (again...I really hated when she did that), "Hm."

"Accidents happen," James said, nodding.

It was actually an accident although I know Emmeline will never believe me.

Besides, snow was my thing with James. Or-it was. For maybe half a second. Argh. If they get together, I really will end up a bitter hag.

Marlene, thankfully, pulled me out of there and into the crowded streets of Diagon Alley before I did something else equally idiotic.

"What was that?" she demanded, "Do you realize I was waiting for you for over an hour? What were you trying to do? Be a spy?"

Psh. Me a spy? Never.

"It was...never mind."

"Don't 'never mind' me," she said sharply, "What were you doing?"

"Failing at eavesdropping," I sighed and linked my arms with hers as we walked down Diagon Alley.

"Hm," she looked pensive, "Well, what are you going to do now?"

"Me? Well, I know we are going to go find him a bloody present. Preferably one better than that blasted snowball," I said, smirking slightly.

Marlene smirked back, "Good. That's the Lily I thought I knew," she said looking, pleased, "It was about time you started acting reasonably sane," she laughed.

Hmpf. Right. Winter Break couldn't end soon enough.

...

And what in the name of Merlin did she mean by 'reasonably sane'?

A/N: Thank you all for your lovely reviews. I so enjoy reading them! :)