A/N- *pops from nowhere* Hiya everone~! ラブはここにある〜 Heh heh heh~! Gosh, I missed my little baby, Disorder! *huggles readers* and of course all of you!
So here's the big date, and forgive me if it's… bad. I'm asexual, don't date because of religion, and NO ONE HAS TOLD ME WHAT PEOPLE DO ON DATES! So forgive me…
Let's get this mind fuck started, ne?
Disclaimer- If I owned DRRR! It would be terrible. No one would like it…
The girl squealed and blushed lightly, grabbing the man's arm and starts dragging him up from his chair.
"Oh gosh, oh gosh! I'm so happy, Shizu-kun~!" Kanra said, too happy to notice Shizuo's irritation.
"Listen, don't call me that." He managed to say from the raven's babbling, "Just reminds me of a Flea."
Kanra just blinked and waved a hand, "of course, of course! I won't say it again!"
The two walked on the side walk of Ikebukuro and the blonde was starting to feel the strange glances from others. 'Yes people, I know she looks like the flea, but goddammit stop staring!'
After a few moments of awkwardness, Kanra finally asked the big question, "What are we doing~?"
When the blonde asked around for places, he only got simple things like the movies or a café`, maybe a more public place would work, though. So the park, he guessed.
"What about the park? It's a nice day outside…" he suggested, still not comfortable with how similar Kanra and the Flea looked alike.
The raven just nodded and they continued walking.
She looked up to the sky and was happy to see barely even a cloud in the bright blue sky.
'Good, good. Now nothing will ruin this moment…'
She smirked slightly when she heard a faint 'asshole' in the back of the raven's mind.
When they reached the park, the two sat down on the bench, Kanra still clinging onto the arm of her lover.
Ruby eyes stare at the handsome face of the blonde, who was now smoking, and smiled a small smile. "Do you remember how we met, Shizuo-kun~? It was such a while ago, you probably don't remember!" She whispers very slowly, right into his ear; which makes his eye wide with surprise.
So they had met?
"I remember verrry well! For me, it was simply love at first sight~!" she said with a very dream-like sigh.
(A small child-a boy- in a carnation pink, frilly dress walks around the park, sitting on the swings.
His hair was barely touching his shoulders, but his bangs hung over his eyes; not showing the blue and purple bruises.
Why was he like this? Why didn't Mother or Father like him?
The boy sat on the swing while he watches his mother chat with another woman, he hears, "What a beautiful girl you have!" and his mother agrees; not once mentioning that the beautiful girl was a BOY.
He remembers the times Father would screech at him for wanting to cut his hair; saying that it was the boy's fault for not being able to re-connect with their parents.
The boy sniffled, but then a kind voice brought him out.
"U-uh, excuse me, miss? Are you okay?" The boy looks up to see two other boys. They looked like brothers. The taller one seems so concerned, he liked that look…
He hears the woman's voice again, "Aww, lookie! Little Shizu-kun wants to play with your girl!"
Said 'Shizu-kun' blushed and offered to push the raven.
A tiny voice pulled the boy into thoughts. "Oh dearest me! He wants to play with me! How sweet~"
'Huh? No! He wants to play with me! Who are you?' he argued in his mind.
"I'm what the people want, what your parents want. What Shizu-kun wants. I'm loved. I'm the loved one. Not you~ so just sleep, sleep, sleep; and let me be loved already."
The boy began to tremble slightly, the other boy tried to calm him down; but the raven was fading. It was suffocating. A gentle little lullaby that Mother used to sing when she was alone and in the corner; drunk and hysterical, began to play in his head.
-Swaying, swaying back and forth.
I sing a soft tale of the stars and moon.
The moon being the only you.
The shiniest, surrounded by loving stars like me.
One day, sweet Moon, I hope you find-
Your bright Sun
Your sweetheart
To rotate alongside.-
The boy was soon fading; crumbling… he could feel it inside of him! A new spirit, it seemed like a whole new heart was beating in his chest; he was choking on water. But all the hurt left as soon as it came, it was so quiet and peaceful.
And like that- Izaya Orihara had become Kanra; who shined a wide smile and said a cheerful "Hello~! Do you want to push me? It would be sooo nice, cutie! My name's Kanra-chan~!")
"It was such a wonderful day! We had so much fun that day, without any interruptions~! Definitely a fave of mine, ya know~? But then we had to go, but I remember host and me always talking about you for months and months in bed! I would give him memories to help him get through the night, poor sweet." She kept rambling on and on, when the words 'host' and 'giving him memories'.
Was this girl insane?
Probably, but just to be safe… Shizuo should keep listening.
"But then we didn't see you for such a long time! But I was smart, unlike host who never spoke about you much. I did my research, and whenever I went out, I would find you~ and Kasuka-kun!"
'Is she a stalker?' the blonde moved slightly away from the chatty raven.
The girl continued on.
"Ya know host never forgot about you! Whenever I would give him memories, he would smile~ But then he would get pissed. I don't know why though! I never really paid attention. But when we got to high school, Host got all weird! I remember that he would tell us all of his dreams, but never again during high school. BUTTT There was this onetime, remember your girlfriend?" Kanra finished the question with a very bitter tone, almost acidic.
"The only time I was happy Nakura came out…"
(Kanra strolls through the hallway near the stair case for the roof, where she smells smoke.
'Shizu-kun!' she thinks happily and skips up the steps, when she opens the door however; her smile automatically dropped.
HER Shizu-kun was being pushed away and called a "freak" before a girl turned around and ran out, not noticing Kanra making sure that the her eyes would memorize every detail.
Kanra watches the blonde sit and get out a cancer stick. The ruby-eyes notice the sadness in his posture- in his hazelnut eyes.
She processes the memories in Izaya's mind and –unfortunately- she slips away into the original.
"Well, well, well, Shizu-chan~! I guess no girl wants you! Hahaha!", Izaya laughs as the flashes come as a rush to him as he walks toward the blonde; who seems to not notice that he's here.
"C'mon, it's just some girl~! Knew it wasn't going to last, anyway; with a monster like you!" the raven laughed, finally getting next to the blonde.
Izaya leaned over the blonde's shoulder relieved that he survived thus far. He didn't like this Shizu-chan. Izaya needed him irritated, angry at him. Something –or some people- just says in his body to not let him be depressed.
Namely Nakura and Kanra.
"Izaya-kun! Do something! I don't like this! Why did that skunk leave someone like him?"
"Do something, ass. Or I will. He's one of the only humans who are decent."
'Don't know about that…'
Izaya leaned in and asked something that had been bugging him anyway.
"Would you prefer it if I was a girl~?"
That certainly brought the blonde out of his musings.
"Ugh! FLEA! Don't make stupid questions like that! That'll be one terrible girl, in which I don't need!"
Shizuo didn't notice the wide smile that the red-eyed male made when they were chasing each other for another game of cat and mouse.
~Later~
Nakura decided to take over when Izaya was far away from the blonde, and was now approaching the girl that was Shizuo's former girlfriend.
The girl was so simple; average height and weight, and simple black hair and brown eyes. Her name was Hatori, he believed.
She was taken by surprised by the tap on her shoulder.
They were all alone, in the girl's bathroom; and the door was locked with a sign on the outside that stated "stay out, radiation".
"Hello, Hatori-chan." He said simply, trying not to look at the mirror.
"A-ah! Orihara-san! I didn't notice you! W-what are you doing he-
She was cut off by the grasping on her neck, cutting her air flow. The coughing and struggles made Nakura smirk with a maniacal glint in his eyes.
"You're a bitch!" he shouted, "bitch, bitch, bitch! I hate you! Hate, hate, hate!" Nakura's grip got tighter with each word.
"He's the greatest human that's ever happened! I don't think none of us would be happy if he was unhappy as well." He let her drop to the floor, watching her gasp for breathe as he grabs the flick blade. He then grabs her arm and twists it back into the sink, turning on scorching hot water.
And he stabs her wrists, twisting it and forcing it up wards.
"Ahhhh! Stop! Stop! Please!"
The crimson eyed personality giggles quietly, trying not to be loud, and speaks so slowly, as if telling a fantasy to a small child.
"Don't get me wrong, the skank is in love with him- not me. I can't say love. Close, but if Host and I have anything in common, it's this…"
Nakura leans in real close with her face and when the boiling water washes away –leaving only the large wound and a pinkish tint to the sink- he stabs her neck and circles the knife around, just enough for it to make it look like suicide.
"We're obsessed." Were the last words Hatori heard, and piercing blood-red eyes were the last things she saw.
Nakura leaves the blade in her neck –having another blade anyway- and when no one is around he sneaks out the bathroom and starts screaming that someone is hurt.
And when he was left alone, he laughed so loud and clutched the host's pillow; it was just too lovely to witness another disgusting human's life gone!
The best part?
Shizuo never found out, and neither did Izaya.)
Shizuo just stared at her blankly as Kanra's eyes went hazy and smile more maniacal.
That's right… Shizuo never found out!
"Kanra, can I ask who and what you're talking about?" the blonde finally asked.
"What? OH! You mean Host and Nakura~ Hahaha! Host is Izaya-kun, silly! I just realized that you thought I didn't know him!" the ruby eyed personality laughed.
Shizuo moved quickly out of his seat and backed up, clearly token by surprised.
"You just fucked up, bitch! Izaya didn't want anyone to know, skank!" Nakura reminded the other personality in Izaya's mind.
"Wa-wait! Host? As-as in like… one body?" Shizuo tried to make sense of it… but couldn't find anything.
What?
Was the Flea that big of a mess?
Was this like a clone? No! That's not possible.
But as Shizuo thought, he knew that he had to get out of here. He'd confront Izaya later when he knew what EXACTLY to say… Because… even now, he didn't know what to say or think.
'Shit!' Kanra cursed, as she watched the blonde back away before he just sprinted away.
~Later~
"YOU WHAT?" Izaya hollered, angry at the woman personality. He was glad that he was alone.
"We-well… you see, I-
"The bitch fucked up and told Heiwajima about me and you. Nothing about those two, though." Nakura pointed to Hibiya and Psyche playing Hibiya's messed up game.
Izaya glared at Kanra, and without thinking that Kanra was just a figment of his imagination-
He lunged for her and landed on the couch.
Now on top of the personality, he pins her and asks with a panicked voice, "Why? Are you an idiot? And don't answer Nakura!" he stares at the woman version of himself, the most beautiful girl; if anyone asked. She had long, silky hair, perfect skin, and a nice body.
Kanra thought about an excuse and used the most perfect one.
"What does it matter? I'm the one loved! Mother and Father wanted me, all the time. They wanted you dead! And guess what, I-za-ya? So does your precious Shizu-chan! No one wants you! Besides they want the best part of you, me! Because I'm everything you want to be!"
"That was low even for me…" Nakura muttered as Hibiya and Psyche stop dead in their tracks in their game to gasp.
Izaya got off and with wide eyes; he tries grabbing her neck, but is only met with the soft pillow.
No. That wasn't true! There are people who want him- the entire human race. He loved all humans, so they should love him as well, right.
And Shizu-chan said it himself, he shouldn't be a girl. That would be gross in the blonde's eyes. That alone makes Izaya calm down and even smile a little bit.
"You're wrong, Kanra… Dead wrong." He turns his back towards her and sits in his desk.
"I know for a fact that you are wrong."
He needs answers. Maybe he should just confront Shizu-chan? He just doesn't know anymore.
A/N- FINALLY! This is the longest chapter of Disorder ever! Yay!
So yeah… Kanra's a bitch. Also if anything is confusing, that's okay. Sooner or later everything will be cleared up.
Review, please?
Until next time,
~Mikomi Ai